u/oiiaiaooiiai

I just can't stop looking at picture of women and it ultimately leads to worse. it's not even about corn itself, I just crave a pretty wife and marriage is so far away so I resort to the easy way. I do my faraidh, pray every day at the mosque, do nawafil, read quran, even post it, I keep telling me that it's haram, that it will only bring me Allah's anger and disappointment, that it will mess up my brain, that no woman would want to be with a bum like that, go to the gym, have other hobbies, nothing works. The moment I start I can't stop. it's like I don't even have brakes anymore, no discipline, no motivation, nothing. I try my best I make dua I have so many ways of busying myself instead, nothing works. and I've stopped before but during that time it was because of straight up h0rnyness but now it's like an emotional void that can't be filled. I want to ask for advice but unless it's something completely new I probably tried it so please just make dua for me to stop

do I need to register to all the electives right away? one electove that I want isn't available for registration can I wait for next semester to see if it will be available?

talking about USM if it changes anything

I uploaded my documents and notified them almost 3 weeks ago but didn't get a response. now when I send them an email I received an automated response telling me their inbox is full but idk if that was case when I first notified them. should I call them instead? (knowing that I'm not from malaysia)

I use an app to learn vocab and it says that ayah tiri means step father and anak tiri lelaki is step son, but that abang tiri is half brother, how do we say step brother then?

baraka 3lia mn had ch3kouka bghit nqadha chwia b3da

I fulfilled my conditions, uploaded my documents and notified them by mail, how much time should I expect before receiving an answer?

I uploaded the documents I needed, do I just wait now?

Im addicted to pmo and had a streak of no pmo for 1.5 years but relapsed and Im now in my 7th month

the thing is, before that streak I was just straight up horny so I could remove it bit by bit, but now it's not about being horny anymore. Im just so lonely. not having female friends anymore, not following women online, not being able to feel the slightest thing towards a girl bc I dont talk to them, I took a big hit sentimentally. Im far from marriage and when I think about it I see no real way of getting there, and even then Im scared of feeling a heavy burden bc if the responsibilities that come with it and not be able to enjoy it fully and be carefree even just sometimes. I constantly feel like Ill never experience anything like that so my brain often just resorts to the easy solution. I pray my five prayers almost always at the mosque, I read quran before the prayer and when I come back from fajr, I do dhikr, I pray nawafil, I pray the prayers I missed when I wasnt practicing, but whatever is wrong with le still makes me fall back to it. I tried fasting but I broke it during midday (what helps in ramadan is that I will need to fast 60 days which isnt the case for non fard fasting). everything I tell myself to help me stop doesnt work I have no idea anymore please if anyone can help me I will really appreciate it jazakum Allah khayran

Im addicted to pmo and had a streak of no pmo for 1.5 years but relapsed and Im now in my 7th month

the thing is, before that streak I was just straight up horny so I could remove it bit by bit, but now it's not about being horny anymore. Im just so lonely. not having female friends anymore, not following women online, not being able to feel the slightest thing towards a girl bc I dont talk to them, I took a big hit sentimentally. Im far from marriage and when I think about it I see no real way of getting there, and even then Im scared of feeling a heavy burden bc if the responsibilities that come with it and not be able to enjoy it fully and be carefree even just sometimes. I constantly feel like Ill never experience anything like that so my brain often just resorts to the easy solution. I pray my five prayers almost always at the mosque, I read quran before the prayer and when I come back from fajr, I do dhikr, I pray nawafil, I pray the prayers I missed when I wasnt practicing, but whatever is wrong with le still makes me fall back to it. I tried fasting but I broke it during midday (what helps in ramadan is that I will need to fast 60 days which isnt the case for non fard fasting). everything I tell myself to help me stop doesnt work I have no idea anymore please if anyone can help me I will really appreciate it jazakum Allah khayran

السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته

I had a pmo addiction from 13 to approx. 20. during that time, I wasn't religious at first but at 17-18 I started learning islam more and slowly became actually practicing. I spent the next few years battling my addiction among other things to get closer to Allah and stopped having female friends and following girls online, but "removing" women from my life and stopping haram entertainment, which made me unable to make new friends and a bit disconnected with my old ones, made me go through a loneliness that made me fall back to pmo last december after 1.5y, and I couldn't stop again since (my longest streak is maybe like 10 days). I just want to look at a pretty woman. that's the only thing that goes through my mind. most of the time it's not even being h0rny or anything just wanting to appreciate the beauty of a woman. I always struggle with lowering my gaze bc my eyes want to see everyone passing by but now that I specifically crave women it's even worse. marriage is far from being an option rn, working out doesn't help and sometimes ironically makes it worse (no free mixing), and fasting could work if I didn't break it halfway through bc of this. everyone says that marrying with an addiction and hoping it would help is stupid but lowkey I feel like it can help my case, but on the other hand the kind of pious wife I pray for probably prays to *NOT* be married to someone like me. I still make tawbah and pray to Allah that I stop this and in shaa Allah I always will until I stop or die. jazakum Allah khayran if you read everything I really needed to get this out of my system and would really appreciate if you have any advice

I hate myself both physically and as a person. I know that there isn't anything in me that justifies it but I really despise myself and will always find a way to remind myself of that fact. I keep trying but everytime I make a small "mistake" everything crumbles and I want that to change

my goal isn't to have the most visible abs so will compounds be enough or should I add some exercices?

I make dua to start hating my previous sins and what's haram in general but I also want to take practical steps if anyone has an idea

I actually fully hate myself + find myself extremely ugly (grew my beard to its max + groom it and I've been going to the gym for years but nothing helps) and giving up haram entertainment made me "boring" and new ones just don't hit the same so now I'm convinced that I will never find a wife and that I don't even deserve one which in moments of weakness makes me think "waiting is so long and I'll probably never have a wife anyways so might as well look at some now" I still repent after every incident and in shaa Allah Ill keep doing it and I make dua everyday for me to stop and for marriage but idk how long I can keep fighting Im scared of doing something worse in the future

(ig the overeating is included in the package bc why not)

there are things I want to happen but every time I think about them I tell myself it's impossible even though I made dua for it does anyone know how to stop overthinking it?

ana soft w drwich bla qyas sahl i sr7ni lwa7d w chi mrat kay tnsb 3lia w qan 3iq w ma kan goul walo makan 7mlch rasi kan 7s brasi b7al chi 7mar