u/sassy_greens

I've come across communities like r/KenyanLadies and thought it would be nice for Tanzanian women to have something similar.. a space where we can connect, share experiences, have open conversations, exchange ideas, and simply meet other women.

I created r/TanzaniaLadies as a women-only community for conversations around relationships, friendships, careers, everyday life and anything else we may want to discuss among ourselves.

Women from outside Tanzania who are visiting, living, studying, or interested in Tanzania are welcome too.

If that sounds like something you'd enjoy being part of, come join us.

I've come across communities like r/KenyanLadies and thought it would be nice for Tanzanian women to have something similar.. a space where we can connect, share experiences, have open conversations, exchange ideas, and simply meet other women.

I created r/TanzaniaLadies as a women-only community for conversations around relationships, friendships, careers, everyday life and anything else we may want to discuss among ourselves.

Women from outside Tanzania who are visiting, living, studying, or interested in Tanzania are welcome too.

If that sounds like something you'd enjoy being part of, come join us.

I’m a 23female, currently in my final year at university( dar es salaam) and about to finish my final exams. I never thought I would be writing a post like this, but I’m honestly in a very difficult situation and I’m hoping someone might have advice, opportunities, or leads. I urgently need a paying job..any honest work.. because I need to cover rent and meals in the coming weeks. At the moment, the only thing left hanging over me is a little savings and my student loan (HESLB) debt, and I don’t have any financial support to rely on. Going back home is unfortunately not an option, because the situation there is even harder and would make things worse for both me and my family. The challenge is that I’m just finishing university, so I don’t yet have many formal qualifications or years of experience, which makes job hunting feel almost impossible right now. Still, I’m willing to work hard and learn quickly.

If anyone has advice, job leads, websites, referrals, or opportunities, I would be deeply grateful. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

I’m a 23F, and my long-distance boyfriend (23M) and I have been together for a while. We’ve had a lot of conversations about our values, future goals, and what we want out of life. One thing I’ve struggled with is the idea of becoming a mother. I’m not sure exactly when this fear started, but the thought of pregnancy, motherhood, and raising children gives me a lot of anxiety. It’s not that I dislike children; I’m just terrified of not being a good parent. I was raised by a single mother, and although she did her best, my childhood had many difficult moments that I still carry resentment and pain from. I’m scared of unintentionally passing those same experiences or emotional wounds on to my own children. I know no parent is perfect, but the possibility of causing that kind of hurt frightens me. My boyfriend is an only child, and because of his own upbringing, he naturally imagines having more than one child someday. I’ve shared some of my fears with him, and he admitted that he also worries about not being a good father because of issues with his own father. For now, we agreed not to make any major decisions yet, since he’s in medical school and I’m still trying to build my career. The truth is, I genuinely don’t know if I want children. What scares me is the possibility of realizing one day that I don’t want them and having to tell him, knowing it could deeply hurt him. I also know I have a tendency to prioritize other people’s happiness over my own, and I’m worried that I could end up sacrificing my own dreams, mental health, and identity to make someone else happy. Since he’s training to become a doctor, I can realistically imagine that a large share of the domestic and emotional load would fall on me. Another fear is divorce and single motherhood. The thought of carrying the mental load of parenting, potentially putting my ambitions on hold, and trying to meet the needs of both children and a spouse feels overwhelming to me.

I’d really appreciate hearing from people who have been in a similar situation or how you would have handled this

I’m a 23F, and my long-distance boyfriend (23M) and I have been together for a while. We’ve had a lot of conversations about our values, future goals, and what we want out of life. One thing I’ve struggled with is the idea of becoming a mother. I’m not sure exactly when this fear started, but the thought of pregnancy, motherhood, and raising children gives me a lot of anxiety. It’s not that I dislike children; I’m just terrified of not being a good parent. I was raised by a single mother, and although she did her best, my childhood had many difficult moments that I still carry resentment and pain from. I’m scared of unintentionally passing those same experiences or emotional wounds on to my own children. I know no parent is perfect, but the possibility of causing that kind of hurt frightens me. My boyfriend is an only child, and because of his own upbringing, he naturally imagines having more than one child someday. I’ve shared some of my fears with him, and he admitted that he also worries about not being a good father because of issues with his own father. For now, we agreed not to make any major decisions yet, since he’s in medical school and I’m still trying to build my career. The truth is, I genuinely don’t know if I want children. What scares me is the possibility of realizing one day that I don’t want them and having to tell him, knowing it could deeply hurt him. I also know I have a tendency to prioritize other people’s happiness over my own, and I’m worried that I could end up sacrificing my own dreams, mental health, and identity to make someone else happy. Since he’s training to become a doctor, I can realistically imagine that a large share of the domestic and emotional load would fall on me. Another fear is divorce and single motherhood. The thought of carrying the mental load of parenting, potentially putting my ambitions on hold, and trying to meet the needs of both children and a spouse feels overwhelming to me.

I’d really appreciate hearing from people who have been in a similar situation or how you would have handled this

I feel like i have been dating horrible men my whole life. I feel dumb looking back to how bad i was treated and still stayed. Fell inlove again with people who treat me worse. Did you all also have multiple bad relationships? Or only one and you learnt a lesson and never did something stupid again.

I feel like i have been dating horrible men my whole life. I feel dumb looking back to how bad i was treated and still stayed. Fell inlove again with people who treat me worse. Did you all also have multiple bad relationships? Or only one and you learnt a lesson and never did something stupid again.

23F here. I've been an atheist for a couple of months now, but I live with my mom, who is a devout Christian.

She wakes up at 4 a.m. every day to attend what's called "Morning Glory" at church, and she's always wanted me to go with her. Since I'm a homebody and usually have to do all the chores, I've been using that as an excuse.

Sundays are the real problem. She always uses emotional manipulation to pressure me into going. When I say no, she starts calling me names, saying I'm doomed and that I'm a bad child. I usually try to stay silent, but then her friends join in, telling me I'm being irresponsible, that I have no valid reason not to go, and that I'm just being stubborn.

I can't really tell them I'm an atheist or that I simply don't believe anymore because I know it would create a much bigger conflict. My mom is also very concerned about her reputation, so she keeps insisting that I should go to church, which honestly makes no sense to me.

I'm mentally exhausted from the constant nagging, the insults, and being treated like an outcast. I just want to know how to deal with this situation until I'm able to live on my own.

23F here. I've been an atheist for a couple of months now, but I live with my mom, who is a devout Christian.

She wakes up at 4 a.m. every day to attend what's called "Morning Glory" at church, and she's always wanted me to go with her. Since I'm a homebody and usually have to do all the chores, I've been using that as an excuse.

Sundays are the real problem. She always uses emotional manipulation to pressure me into going. When I say no, she starts calling me names, saying I'm doomed and that I'm a bad child. I usually try to stay silent, but then her friends join in, telling me I'm being irresponsible, that I have no valid reason not to go, and that I'm just being stubborn.

I can't really tell them I'm an atheist or that I simply don't believe anymore because I know it would create a much bigger conflict. My mom is also very concerned about her reputation, so she keeps insisting that I should go to church, which honestly makes no sense to me.

I'm mentally exhausted from the constant nagging, the insults, and being treated like an outcast. I just want to know how to deal with this situation until I'm able to live on my own.

Like even holding hands in public can be hard for some partners. I need to understand why this happens and why you hate pda. My partner(26) and i(23) have been arguing alot about it and i feel like he is being too dramatic with this. He hates pda and even just the thought of a kiss in public leaves his spiralling and never wants to discus about it. I understand some people can be sensitive and shy but it doesn't conclude to never showing some affection . I need to know why this happens.

I need advice on this. Many of us have been raised by parents and caregivers who never told us about emotional intelligence or understanding our own emotions. We have very few emotions vocabulary and as a victim of that i need to improve and learn but i am still lost. I have read a couple of books, they are good but what else does one need?

Need to hear from people who work as market analysts or business analysts, how is your work like? What's really interesting about it and what's not that amaizing. As a young person in tanzania i am interested in this career path, what do i need to learn and upskill. Not sure if my degree holds ( took a bsc in information systems)

Been struggling alot with friends and family. They might say something as a joke but i feel like i always take them personal. I feel hurt whenever they say something that looks really not of a big deal to them. I always start overthinking stuffs and crash out. I really wanna change this.

I remember being in one of a so called prophet church service back then. He demanded that if it's your first time inside the church you must pay him a private visit before session where he prays for you and gives you a fruity " blood of jesus" juice which tasted very weird..after that during the service prayer i started hearing stuffs and vision being colored asf. I have been thinking maybe that juice contained something and was given on purpose of showing 'god's powers'

I have been reading most of the posts here, and I came to see if other people had the same experience as mine. I feel hopeless, really, most of the time. It's like everything is falling on my shoulders

I'm a 22F and have been living with moderate hearing loss for almost 10 years now. It all started when I was 13, suddenly. We believe it was caused by medication since I had a really bad fever that had to be brought down quickly before it caused major harm. That's when my life changed. I wish I had received the same medical and emotional support that everybody else seems to have. But back then, my parents would just give me some money, and I had to deal with everything on my own..doctor's appointments and all. I was eventually given a hearing aid that did nothing but make everything louder and noisier while leaving me uncomfortable. I ended up ditching it and just surviving regardless. I've been acting strong all these years, but truthfully? I'm not that strong. I'm dying inside whenever I'm reminded that I'm different, that I'm not normal. I was lucky that my hearing loss wasn't progressive, and I've managed to live with it all this time. The biggest effect it has had is destroying my self-esteem. I just finished university, and I've been really depressed thinking about how I'm going to survive in a work environment, let alone even getting a job. I still have dreams, i still have plans..but i feel like a failure whenever i remember i can screw everything up. I'm so devastated. I'm so angry that I never really got the support I deserved. My parents didn't seem to care at all. They only asked me about the hearing aid after eight goddamn years. I feel lost. I feel anxious. I wish I had enough money to get proper treatment, but living in a third-world country, you can probably guess how hard things are.

I just wanted to get this off my chest.

I have tried being patient, tried to forgive him multiple times i found him flirting with random girls. He always tried to control himself from hitting me when he was angry but the sound of his fist on the wall always scares me..he sa'd me last time we were together when i tried and tried to say no..i need to end this but i don't know how💔