u/takeaabreath

Over the past few months, I’ve noticed some of my most nauseous/ queasy days are the days following my period and before or during ovulation.

Before my period, I may get a little queasy as well, but I swear it’s not as bad as how I feel at the end or after it ends…

Anyone know what causes this?

I’ve been a mom for 10 1/2 years now. My son was born when I was just 20 yrs old and then I had my second, my daughter, eight years later. I now have a 10.5 yr old and 2 yr old. It’s a whirlwind to say the least. Our second really did throw a wrench in our lives. Everything is so much harder with multiple kids than it was with one child. And I’m still not used to it. I may never be.

I’ve really struggled finding my peace within motherhood. I’ve lost myself in the responsibilities and workload of it all and rarely get glimpses of true happiness and fulfillment.

Over the years, I’ve noticed a change in my demeanor. I used to be really positive and kind to everyone. Now Im like a ball of negativity and have this downright hatred for all of society. I’m overly critical - towards myself and others. I can be really blunt and mean at times. It takes a lot to get me to enjoy something. I’m always thinking about the next task I need to do. I put so much focus on myself and the kids, especially the toddler, that I neglect my boyfriend, who’s been by my side since the beginning. We love each other so deeply, but we bicker more than we ever have before.

It doesn’t help that we have a lot of financial strain causing a whole lot of stress in our lives, but honestly, that’s just a small part of it all.

I truly believe that the endless stress of being a mom has made me this way. Some women fall in love with the motherly role and others may feel more resentment towards it. I love my kids beyond measure, but I don’t enjoy mom life. I feel like each and every day I’m doing things that I don’t want to do, which causes me to feel layers and layers of frustration and anger. It’s all just piled up over the years.

I can’t figure out what I want or how I can make my life feel happier and more enjoyable. I can tell you though - having a toddler doesn’t help anything. Im always eager for the years ahead, when the kids are a bit older, and life may feel more manageable once again. I look forward to being able to laugh more often and have some real fun. I don’t even know what that’s like anymore. Everything is so damn serious!

Are you able to keep up the same routine as normal? Do you take more rest days? Do you lessen the intensity; walk instead of run? Drop heavier weights for lighter ones? Do more yoga instead of hiit?

I’ve been in a solid workout routine for over a year now. It started with 3-4 days a week of some kind of movement. Now, it’s focusing more on strength (using dumbbells and kettlebells) and running 3-4x a week. There are many weeks where I am exercising everyday, 7 days each week. I ran my first 10k back in December and then did 9 miles last week. I’ve never been a runner and it feels so good to be at this point. I’m constantly afraid of losing progress.

Before my period even begins, I notice a change in my energy. I want to sleep more, I want to be lazy, and I just feel heavier. I still manage to keep up with my movement but working out becomes more challenging for sure.

Once my period starts, I start off feeling okay. Aside from cramps and bleeding, I can (somehow) still keep up, with a little help from ibuprofen. Day 3 hits and oh my god - this morning I felt like I got hit by a bus. I had all the plans to wake up early and workout but physically I couldn’t do it. It’s funny because I bleed less on day 3 but often times will feel physically worse than the first 2 days of my period.

Just curious if your period (including PMS/PMDD) affects your ability to exercise?

The dinner rush- it’s my least favorite part of the day. As a mom, it’s probably the most overwhelming and overstimulating time of the day.

It creeps up before I know it. The dread. The exhaustion. Wanting the day to be over but having to get over the hump of cooking first. There seems to always be a big rush to get it over and done with and to get the kitchen cleaned up and ready for the next day. I don’t know what it’s like to enjoy cooking or preparing a meal because I feel like there’s always something else I’d rather be doing or a hurry to eat and get the kids bathed and in bed pronto.

Not to mention, food is freaking expensive and it’s so hard to keep up with! You run out of things 24/7 and trying to come up with a new meal every single night UGH! It sucks. Also, grocery stores nowadays are so unfriendly. Everyone you see grocery shopping acts pissed off or in a hurry. Don’t even get me started about the self checkouts. Nobody wants to do any of it.

I feel like, at one point in time, we all had more patience for cooking and grocery shopping. People were more pleasant about it all. Now, nobody wants to cook, everyone acts like they don’t have time to cook, we’re all impatient, pissed off about the cost of food and then having to cook for children and a family adds a whole other layer to the dread and complexity.

I feel like most people we know have their kids in some sort summer camp/activity every week or every other week all summer long. My kids - ages 2 and 10 - are stuck with their grandparents 3x a week while I work my part time job. On the days they’re home with me I try to get them out to do things, but there’s only so much I can do as we have a super limited budget. We go to the library and the park as often as possible. There are definitely some days where a trip to the grocery store is the most “exciting” activity of the day.

I find there’s so much pressure to have your kids constantly busy throughout the summer. I get that some families work full-time and have to plan for their children to be in regular camps because of that, but the cost of it all is crazy. I was lucky enough to be able to afford one camp for my 10 yr old but it’s not until July.

We don’t have the means to travel. There are lots of days at home. The kids are bored sometimes, but that’s our reality right now. Anyone else in the same boat?

I have a late teether! My 2 year old is just now getting her top/bottom canines and they’re all coming in at once. Honestly though, she’s still been pretty happy - she’s eating normal, sleeping (mostly) normal, and acting her usual self.

The only thing that’s changed: her poops!

This girl has dealt with constipation for a long time. Mostly firm poops and very few soft ones. The last few days they’ve been alternating between her usual to very soft, mushy stools. One being a big blowout on Sunday morning. We had to change her bed sheets, etc! Since Sunday, she’s had some normal/firm poops with these random mushy and messier ones here and there.

As I stated, she’s acting normal and eating normal. No fever. Just very inconsistent bowel movements.

Is this teething?!

Firstly, my daughter is a generally happy toddler. She’s not in any obvious discomfort or pain. She eats well. Drinks well. Sleeps well. Plays well. Etc…

For the longest time - she’s been pooping pellets and balls. We’ve gotten used to (sometimes) 3-4 poops per day, with just a little bit in each diaper. It’s been like this for a long time, maybe since she started eating solid foods. We’ve tried limiting her milk consumption and adding more water into her days, but even still, it doesn’t always change anything.

Every so often, she will have a HUGE blowout and legit clear herself out. Sooo much poop. It happened just yesterday actually - she had taken a massive poop in her diaper and it spilled out into her crib and we had to strip her down, give her a bath etc. Very atypical from what her usual poops look like 😅
These kinds of poops happen maybe 1x a month or less. Maybe she was extra hydrated and had more fiber that day or something.

We are wanting to start potty training soon, however, I’m a little nervous as to how it’s gonna go based on her pooping track record.

Curious if you’ve dealt with similar issues with your toddlers before and what may have helped?

I have functional depression so you could say. I stay on top of everything. The house is (mostly) clean. I still cook multiple times a week. I force myself to get out of the house with the kids. I work part time and even (somehow) manage to hold myself together enough to exercise regularly. I’m in good shape and from a distance, look as if I’m doing quite well.

In my mind, it’s a completely different story. Deep down I want to quit everything. Sleep is my best friend and every morning, it’s an internal battle to get out of my comfort space. Lots of dwelling the day ahead; lots of audible sighs. I’m in a chapter where I very much despise a lot of my motherhood duties/responsibilities and the weight of it all causes me so much depression, loss of interest, etc. I’m responsible and I go through all the motions but I feel as if I’m on auto-pilot. I feel numb to everything. There’s an intense lack of excitement for anything and everything I do. I find that being a mom and struggling financially, has put me in such a deep hole. I literally feel stuck every day. I feel stuck because I’m a mom and the responsibilities never end. I also feel stuck because we aren’t making enough money to do anything. I have no motivation to change any of it. It’s a perpetual cycle.

As far as keeping up with the basic stuff - cooking, cleaning, exercising, my work, etc… I, somehow, have a lot of discipline even while I’m at the lowest of lows. I feel very strong in that regard. But, I also know there’s so much more I could be - to myself and my children. I’m not a bad mom, but I’m not a great mom. I’m proud of myself for maintaining my healthy, active lifestyle but it still hasn’t “cured” my depression.

Anyways… motherhood is hard. Especially as a depressed mother. I really have to fight and give it all I’ve got to step foot out of my bed each morning. I move with grace and show a lot of strength from the outside, but mentally I’m so tired and nobody knows it. I’m just not having a good time.

Seriously, though. It sounds all nice and good and then the reality is- stimulation overload. Trying to pivot from one thing to the next. Trying to finish a sentence before having to run off in the other direction. Trying to sit down to enjoy a little picnic lunch and some toddlers are actually eating, the others are too distracted to eat (mine).

By the end of the little get-together, I’m flat out exhausted. Overstimulated. I’m hot and sweaty. Irritated. And disappointed that I didn’t get to chat with the other moms hardly at all because my toddler was pulling me in all the other directions.

I often ask myself, is it even worth it? I’m so excited to get passed this age, where there’s a bit more independence and I can sit down, relax, and talk with other moms, friends, etc without it feeling like my head is spinning to do so.

I’ll be honest- a majority of my workouts don’t happen in the morning’s. At least, not the super early morning. I’m such a night owl and have always struggled getting up at 5 or 6am to do a workout. Occasionally, yes, I can do it. The other week I managed to get up at 5am on a Tuesday and get my workout done. Did it feel good? Absolutely. Do I want to add more of those into my routine? Yes! But right now, it’s never consistent. I’m lucky if I can do it once a week or every couple weeks.

With all that said, I don’t stress about what time I get my workout done as long as I get it done. Every day my schedule looks different. If I don’t feel like working out in the morning, then I’ll wait until the afternoon or evening. On the weekend’s, I have the luxury of doing a mid-late morning workout and wish I could do a 10 AM run every day cuz that timeframe is perfect. Not too early but not too late.

Of course, if I know I’m not going to have time later in the day, I will try to get up earlier and do it. Otherwise, I find that being flexible makes it feel more enjoyable for me. Anyone else feel this way?

I’m a 30 year old mom (2 years postpartum). My cycles are very regular and have always been, for the most part. As long as I can remember, I’ve always had this random lull around day 3 or 4. Even before I had my baby two years ago, although it might be more apparent now.

Here’s how my period goes:

Day 1: Mostly physical discomfort and cramps. Bleeding gradually ramps up to a moderate-heavy flow.

Day 2: Cramps get better. Bleeding is heaviest.

Day 3: Much, much lighter bleeding. Feel really fatigued and lethargic this day.

Day 4: Flow will diminish completely. Sometimes this happens on day 3, but it’s usually a gradual taper between end of day 3 and day 4.

Day 5: Light bleeding returns. Sometimes mild cramping too.

Day 6-7: Period gradually diminishes and ends.

Is this normal?!?

My daughter turned two at the end of March. So she’s barely over two. I’m trying to let her get out of her stroller and walk more often when we go on our neighborhood strolls, however, she’s not very good at it…

She walks slow. She still wants to pick up every interesting object she sees on the ground - rocks, flowers, etc. She gets very distracted and trails off, literally. It still takes us forever to make it one block because of how often she stops and starts. We’re constantly trying to encourage her to keep up with us and walk faster. Eventually, we end up putting her back in the stroller because the patience involved is insane 😅

At home, she’s constantly moving and running around. From room to room. When we’re outside, all walking together, she slows to a halt and gets so distracted. Doesn’t want to hold our hands either. It doesn’t help that our neighborhood is not very family friendly and there’s only a few sidewalks on certain streets, so I can’t just let her go, unfortunately.

Is this still fairly typical for a newly 2 year old? I feel like she should be better at it by now. When did your toddler become more capable at walking for longer distances without getting distracted by everything?

My daughter is not a good water drinker. I don’t know why. It’s not like she hates water and she will drink it when she really wants to, but I often have to remind her to take a sip of water throughout the day.

Water is the main thing we offer her. I will, occasionally, mix a little juice (grape or apple) with her water and she tends to gulp that down faster. Surprise surprise haha. She gets 1-2 small cups of milk per day. Otherwise, she gets most of her dairy from cheese, yogurt, and other things.

I also want to mention that we’ve had constipation problems with her for what seems like forever! I can’t figure out if it’s from a particular food (or lack there-of) or if it’s simply because she’s not hydrated enough. It’s always been a mystery because she’s not in any discomfort or anything.

I just want her to stay more hydrated and I obviously don’t want to resort to juice too often because then I worry she won’t be as interested in her water. Any advice is welcome! TIA!

My daughter turned 2 at the end of March. She still has a younger baby look to me and I think to others as well. A mom today guessed her age at 18months and she’s almost 26 months 😅

I think it also depends on how I dress her. Certain clothes definitely make her look younger and if I dress her up and put her hair in pigtails, she looks a bit older.

Either way - she’s a petite little thing. Still has a stocky body type, with short legs and a round belly. She’s only 34 inches tall at most. I’ve seen some 2 years olds her age that are much more mature looking with longer legs and more kid-like body structure. I’m still anticipating some bigger growth spurt that has yet to happen - where her body stretches out, clothes don’t fit anymore, and her facial features change.

Speaking of facial features, she still doesn’t have her canines (top or bottom) and her second molars haven’t come it yet. Perhaps she’s just a “late bloomer” lol

I love my kids. I really do. They have my heart forever. I try to be a good mom to them. I try to make them nutritious meals, interact and play with them, take them places, plan fun activities, and, of course, be there for them emotionally. I do my best with the energy I have.

With all that said, I’m a very depressed mom. I’m an anxious mom. Im an extremely lonely mom. I wake up with little to no excitement for the day ahead. I drag my feet. I go through all the motions,feeling like I’m on autopilot, just drifting from one task to the next task. I don’t enjoy any of it really. I’ve felt stuck for a long time. As if I’m living a life I don’t appreciate. I force smiles even when I’m feeling sad. Most of the time, I just feel numb to all my emotions. It’s been hard for me to shed a tear for a long time.

I have 2 kids. A 10 year old son and 2 year old daughter. An 8 year age gap. It’s tricky yet maybe slightly less chaotic than having two toddlers at once. Either way, my mind convinced that I NEEDED to have a child when I was 20 years old. I never knew why. It was just this intense craving I had and thought it was what I needed. Having one child was tough, but fast forward 8 years to having two children and it’s far more challenging than I ever imagined.

With each child I had, happiness and contentment was never obtained. For the most part, it’s just made me want the freedom I’ve never had. The responsibilities of being a mom have been hard to accept. It’s like I’m in denial that this is my life and I have this much work to do every single day to keep these kids happy and healthy and thriving.

And before anyone asks - yes, I have a very wonderful partner/boyfriend. We’ve been together through it all. For 11 years. He’s a good dad to our kids and helps/supports me as much as possible. But our life isn’t easy… we both struggle with depression. We’re both not making enough money. We both lack a lot of ambition. We both struggle to focus on multiple things at a time, which makes juggling our life around 2 children very tough. We both crave slower-paced lifestyle and would rather make less money if it means having more downtime. I should be working more, but with the cost of childcare, I’ve sacrificed my income to stay home with the kids more often. The last decade of life, I’ve only worked part time jobs. I think (mentally) with being a mom, it’s all I can handle without it feeling like too much. I don’t do well with stress and being a mom is SO MUCH STRESS AND WORRY. I just feel very limited with what I can do because being a mom takes so much of my energy. And because of this, it makes me frustrated with motherhood. It’s like I’m constantly pushing against my normal “flow” and trying so hard to adapt to this new flow and I’ve been fighting it for YEARS.

Anyways, thank you if you’ve read this far. I didn’t know it would be this much but I guess it all relates to my WHY in not enjoying being a mom.

Have there been joyous moments? Yes, of course. There have been very tender, sweet moments, but even still the negative outweighs the positive and has been so for a very long time.

I just don’t think that being a mother is as enjoyable for every woman. You can’t plan for how you’re going to feel after you have kids. What really surprises me is to see these women having one baby after the next, going through so many miserable and exhausting moments, and then wanting more?! It’s the definition of torture, really.

Because of my social anxiety, I find that I literally cannot form relationships. Nobody wants to talk to me. I’m always the one person in the room that feels as if I don’t belong. At times, I feel like a ghost. I’m not memorable. I don’t stand out. I can’t contribute to conversations. I’m just there, looking calm and happy on the outside, but legit screaming on the inside.

I don’t know how other people perceive me, exactly. I can only imagine that I’m a very difficult person to read, which (in turn) makes people less likely to interact with me. Maybe I give off uncomfortable vibes since I am uncomfortable and people can feel that so they stay away. Who knows.

I’m always envious of other people’s social and conversational skills. I watch how confident they are when they speak. Their voice is loud and they’re always heard and noticed. When I do choose to speak, it’s barely acknowledged. I often wonder why I even try. I might as well just not be there.

I’ve been dealing with social anxiety for so long. I’m 30 years old now and some days it ruins my entire day. Other days, I can power through it. Either way - I always end up feeling like I don’t belong. I feel isolated. I crave connections, I want to be that person who doesn’t go unnoticed, I want to have good conversations with people, and I want to feel like I’m important and recognized. I just don’t know how to break free and shake all this anxiety away. I want so badly for it to just disappear.

Anyone else feel this way too?

My daughter turned 2 at the end of May. She’s measuring 33.75” tall and 26-27 lbs. So, like 40-45th percentile. She can still fit in 18 month clothes, but ranges up to 2T depending on the brand, fit, etc. Most of her shirts/jackets are 2T, but pants and shorts are 18m. I’ve been waiting for her to grow out of her 18 month footie pajamas but, alas, they STILL fit! She just recently sized up to size 6 shoes but has 5’s that still work.

She’s still got fairly short wavy/straight hair and it’s longer in the back, kinda like a mullet lol.

It’s funny because some days I look at her and I think she looks so big and other days, she still looks SO small and baby-like, especially compared to those 90th percentile toddlers her age!

What does your workout routine look like? How many minutes per day and how many days per week? What time do you workout - AM or PM?

As a mom of two (a 10 yr old and 2 yr old) I’m forever trying to figure out my “flow” and rhythm with exercise. I’m always interested how other momma’s are balancing it all.

It’s tough, not gonna lie. Some days, if I don’t get up at 5am, I lose my shot at a peaceful workout. Other days, I’m trying to squeeze some movement in at the end of the day, after the toddler goes to bed. When both kids are with me, we go for walks. I don’t own a jogging/running stroller so my runs have to be solo. Occasionally, I’ll try to get a 30 minute strength workout in while both kids are around but it’s so distracting and never ideal. I try to hit my 10K step goal each day at a minimum, however, I aim for 30-60 minutes of intentional exercise. Sometimes I’ll split it up and do 30 mins here and another 30 mins there.

Are you just winging it? Do you actually have a routine?

I’m a mom of two - a 10 year old and a 2 year old. I work part time a few days a week and it’s usually only 1/2 days which is nice in my current season of life. Currently, I prioritize movement whenever I have any little bit of downtime. That can be during naps, in the afternoon or evening, or any gaps in my workday (if I’m lucky). Anyways, I’m really trying to get my exercise in early in the day, like before the kids wake up! I’m finding it extremely difficult to do. I’m not a morning person and it takes me awhile to get myself up and going each morning.

Another challenge is the fact that my 10 year old gets up for school at 6am and we leave the house at 6:45am to drop him off. So my cut off for “me time” is 6am. I like to try to be present with him during that time and make him breakfast, etc before he heads off for the day. Sooo in order to get exercise in I need to wake up at freaking 5am or earlier to give myself that hour to do so. Some days I can do it and other days I just can’t! It’s very inconsistent and I’ve never been able to maintain that routine, ever!!

This AM I set my alarm for 5am and I had all intentions to do a 30 min upper body workout + a brisk walk or a run for some cardio and guess what?! I didn’t get my butt out of bed until 5:25 and now only have time for a 15 min exercise. So frustrating. The second part of my workout will have to come later in the day. That’s what I gotta do sometimes - split it up!

I still get my movement in each day, regardless, but man is it tough to always find the time. I’ll be honest - some days I don’t want to do it at all. I wish I could just throw in the towel. Tomorrow my exercise consists of running a 10K and I gotta figure out how I can squeeze in an hour of running into my day. Phew.