u/tldraddict

Hey everyone. My son is five days old and since early pregnancy I was set on the fact I would be exclusively formula feeding. I had breast cancer some years ago and while my oncologist said it may still be possible to express on one boob, I felt it may be too triggering and difficult to try. But now he’s here I feel guilty for not giving it a go. I’ve had no signs that milk will come in but I wanted to ask if it’s too late to give it a go, or any success stories from similar contexts? Thank you in advance

Our baby has spent the first few days of his life guzzling Kendamil ready to feed bottles and loving it. But we’re home with him now and ready to try a less expensive alternative. This is probably a stupid question but I can’t understand how his stomach can go from drinking 30-50ml at a time to a 4oz/120ml bottle we make up… For anyone who did the same shift did you notice a drop off in volume and baby’s weight as a result

I am on day 3 post c section and as expected feeling very tender and slow. What I didn’t expect was the pain in my left butt cheek and leg, every time I lie down. It’s almost as if I’m bruised around my tailbone. Has anyone experienced similar

My in laws came to visit my new baby in hospital today and when they were leaving they both kissed him on the head. It was a one off and they are quite old so won’t have realised - although my husband says he’ll now speak to them about waiting until after the baby is vaccinated etc. But I’m worried. As a one off is it still really bad? Baby doesn’t have his midwife/paediatrician checks until we leave hosp tomorrow, should I ask/inform them about it…?

Did anyone here have a c section between 38-39 weeks? Panicking I will go into labour early before my elective and I’m looking for positive stories I guess - my anxiety has been so high the past few days I can barely function.

I’m having my c section on Thursday, and both the chat with my (very lovely and supportive) anaesthetist about risks and some judgemental comments from (older) people in my life have got me down and made me so nervous. Where I live (in the UK) c sections are so common, so logically I know my panic is unfounded, but I feel like I’m being perceived as a failure as not trying to give birth vaginally for my first baby.

I’ve had a lot of health issues in the past and suffer with severe anxiety, so the control of an elective always appealed to me. My husband is super supportive, but I guess I’m looking for positive stories to get me over the last little hump! Thank you x

Did anyone else not hear from them before birth? Nearly 37 weeks and giving birth at 38+4, but still haven’t had any contact with them. I live in London

…so when did you guys stop? I’m 34 weeks now and our sex life has slowed only slightly due to logistics. I’m kind of keen to just keep on going till the end, especially as we have to take six weeks off. If we did is it harmful in any way?

Hey everyone. Looking for advice bc I am tearing my hair out with vinted’s customer service emails/messages. A month ago the app banned me for uploading a counterfeit product that was actually real. I’ve emailed them and messaged them LOADS, provided images to prove the item is real along with the receipt and yet my account is still blocked. At one stage they sent me an automatic message to say the issue was resolved, but the account was still blocked? I know their customer service AI is bad but this is getting ridiculous. Anything else I can do to speak to an actual person? Or can I just make a new account with a different email. It’s driving me nuts!

Hello! I am a FTM and have been very anxious due to previous health issues for my entire pregnancy. My baby was measuring really big up until the past few weeks - he’s now 57th percentile but he started in the high 90s. I panicked about size and a potential GD diagnosis (which later turned out to just be some mild insulin spiking) and booked in an elective c section.

But now we’re five or so weeks out and I’m having cold feet. Has anyone changed their mind about how they choose to give birth? I’m about 33 weeks and so uncertain and worried about all the risks and variables. My consultant says if I go into labour before my elective date she can give me a category 3 c section, I’m wondering if I should ask to give it a go vaginally if that happens.

EDIT: I feel like I may have worded this badly! I know i CAN/am entitled to change my birth plan. Im really wondering if anyone’s had a similar experience. I can never tell if my dithering is down to anxiety or whether it’s worthwhile abandoning a previous plan. Sorry bad wording!

This is a question I can’t really find an answer to online but - for those who are self employed, is there a certain number of hours a week you are entitled to work while claiming MA/SMP? I’ve heard mixed things from my self employed friends, and while it would be great to supplement my income bc obviously I can’t take maternity leave, im wary of accidentally doing some sort of esoteric benefit fraud.

I’m 31 weeks today and as it’s going to be so so hot in London this week we are driving out to Cornwall to get some relief. My husband thinks it’s a great idea and so does my consultant. I know deep down it is too but I am SO anxious about the long drive. We’re taking lots of stops and I am wearing very fashionable compression stockings too. Is there anything else I can do to make it more bearable? Or at least stop worrying lol

I’ve been struggling during pregnancy, not enjoying it or being able to enjoy life generally to the point that my GP now wants to do an urgent referral to the perinatal mental health team for depression. I am worried about this - the fact it will be I guess “marked” on my file and possibly means that when the baby comes they think I won’t be able to look after him as well as if I didn’t have any issues during pregnancy.

I’m nearly 28 weeks so quite close to the end, which makes me worried about the postpartum interventions I might expect… has anyone got any experience with prenatal MH teams they could share?

I was super active pre pregnancy and managed to keep up working out four days a week until I hit about 20 weeks and then it all started going sideways… I got hit badly by nausea and acid reflux and my MH has taken a knock as I’ve got bigger. I’m almost 27 weeks now and still managing to work out twice a week but the intensity has really let up and I’m feeling super disappointed in myself. This week I had to get off the cross trainer after 15 minutes because I thought I was going to faint!

I really thought I’d be able to keep it up till the end. Now I’m thinking - will all my progress completely disappear into nothing by the time this baby comes? I feel as big as a house already.

Hi! I’m planning to formula feed my son once he’s born, but this is my first baby and I feel fairly clueless (especially because a lot of the advice I’ve received is BF-focused).

I wanted to see what people do overnight if they formula feed - Does anyone use the Kendamil ready to feed bottles, as these seem easiest? I’ve seen lots of mums on social media prepping a big jug of formula to use throughout the day/night but they seem mainly US based and using a brand called Dr Browns, so I’m not sure if NHS recommends against it?

I feel a bit awkward asking these questions in real life as perhaps they seem really obvious and I’ve also had some unkind comments about not breastfeeding, so grateful for any advice!

My baby measuring on the large side and it’s making me reconsider how I might give birth further down the line. At 20 weeks his tummy was in the 97th percentile (tested negative for GD) and now at 24 weeks he’s around 74th percentile overall. I’m surprised as both me and my partner are pretty small people and delivered underweight. Kind of similar trend for both our families too. Nobody seems to be able to predict whether he’ll keep trending downwards towards a more normal weight or whether I’ll give birth to a baby as big as me lol. Anyone had similar situations?

I am around six months pregnant now, and I'm genuinely curious whether my NHS experience is really as bad as it feels, or whether I'm being sensitive and stupid. In the interest of context, I have previously been treated for chronic and serious illness by the NHS, and I know how good some hospitals and doctors/pathways can be (although the majority of my expeirences were admittedly pre-pandemic).

Since becoming pregnant I have never seen the same midwife, and I've never felt properly listened to at any of those appointments. On one occasion I rang triage only to be told not to bother coming in because there were no doctors to see me anyway. On my most recent midwife appt (24 weeks) the midwife asked how I was feeling emotionally and physically, and when I reported feeling very bad in both instances, simply said "ok". Not a single one of the vaccines and tests I'd previously already had during pregnancy had been logged on her system, and to top it all off she misspelled my name on my MA1 form. I think I'd become used to feeling not listened to by this stage, but my husband, who was with me for this last appointment, was pretty shocked at how bad it was.

Which makes me think... is it bad? It's a busy London hospital so they obviously have so many people to care for at any one time. At the same time my personal experience has honestly made me so wary of getting pregnant again. It's frustrating too because I keep reading these news stories about how bad maternity care is within the NHS in terms of excess deaths and pain management, and how all these extra measures are being put in place to tackle it. But actually experiencing it doesn't feel great.

I'm not just looking to rant here but more for context or opinions. I know it's very variable - for every terrible antenatal experience it seems there is a good one etc. It just feels very depressing and frustrating really, bc it feels like there's nothing I (or the NHS really, after endless austerity/cutbacks) can do about it. I suppose I feel quite torn between being very grateful that the NHS exists in theory, but wishing it worked better in practice.