u/unhinged-baker

My old credit card account (which I still use and have good credit on) has all of my old information.

It has my old legal name (first and last have changed), old address, and old phone number.

My anxious dumbass has neglected to update information on this card throughout the years. I've had it since I was 18-19.

How do I approach this situation without customer service thinking it's identity theft?

I have amassed legal documentation that proves who I am and that i own this card.

When I call, do I start by requesting to change my legal name?

Or my phone number?

Because they constantly ask to verify who I am through texting me, but texts then go to my old phone number.

I am US based.

I got this credit card account (not through my personal bank; different institution my parents randomly suggested) when I was freshly 18-19.

My scared dumbass has since neglected to update my personal information since throughout the years. I am terrified of phone calls, though it's gotten better.

My credit card has the wrong legal name, phone number, and address.

How do I convince customer service I am me when I contact them?

They have no physical offices where I live so it will have to be over phone.

I have been amassing the legal documentation I need to prove I am me and that I still actively use this credit card.

I have my old and new licenses, marriage certificate, name change court orders, a verification letter from my personal bank, and a recent credit card statement.

So when I call them, what should I attempt to change first?

My phone number?

Legal name?

Address?

I got my Citibank credit card when I was freshly 18-19. Being the dumbass that I am, I have since neglected to update the information on my account throughout the years.

My Citibank credit card account has the wrong legal name, wrong phone number, and incorrect address.

How do I call and get this changed without them thinking I'm a scammer/fraud?

Which do I attempt to change first?

I have amassed legal documents that prove who I am and that i am the rightful owner of this account still. I just need to get it to their customer service department somehow.

This is more of an open question for everyone who is neurodivergent (autism, ADHD, audhd, etc.).

I find it incredibly difficult to comfort and support people around me who are struggling emotionally and mentally. I feel awful about it.

It's not that I don't care, though I've lost so many relationships because people assume as such.

Ive been constantly burnt out for the last few years to such an extent that I'm almost always emotionally unavailable.

That and I have big emotions frequently that I struggle to contain and regulate.

People around me quickly assume all I care about is myself. But really i just have to spend so much time regulating myself so that I don't have a meltdown.

The only person I make time for without question and to the detriment of myself is my husband. He recently lost his mum and Ive done everything I could think of to support him within my ability.

His father though is also grieving. We just began living with him, and i am trying to be supportive, but I just had a meltdown in front of him because of the stress of moving and a different environment. I feel so guilty because it's such a stupid thing to cry over when he literally just lost his partner.

How do you manage helping others when you're barely regulating yourself? How do you be emotionally available when you're on empty?

My father in law's house is currently in a level 3 evacuation zone due to a 3000 acre fire. It has not reached his neighborhood so him and his neighbors decided to stay and not evacuate.

My husband and i were in the middle of moving into his dad's place when the fires hit. We are currently right outside the evac zone with our pets in an Airbnb.

His dad asked him if he was coming back to help finish the painting. I immediately got angry and told him to stay with me.

My husband and i argued for a bit. Finally he did agree to stay.

But now I feel like I look like the bad guy here. I just don't feel comfortable with my husband entering an evacuation zone with the fires actively burning still.

I vented to my mom and she agreed with my FIL.

She actually told me I just needed to trust my husband and FIL and their judgement for what they thought was best. She said as wives it's basically our duty to just stay quiet and listen.

I blew up on her and now made her cry. I feel like such an asshole. But I am just really scared right now. Homes are burning down left and right.

I have no idea what to do. Im hunkered down with my pets hoping we don't have to evacuate. My job is in the evacuation zone and the fire is moving their way.

The store is not answering so I can't call out. My boss wants me to go into the evacuation zone at 3am to work.

I don't know what to do.

Edit: found out my store evacuated but it's a disaster. No one knows what is going on. No one knows if the store will even be open tomorrow.

Level 3 evacuations are all around me currently. Im just outside the zones, though.

A 2000 acre fire is heading towards my neighborhood. I have to work in the morning at 3am.

Should I call out if I evacuate? Will I get fired if I don't show?

Ive never experienced this before. I've never evacuated before.

Im currently packed up and ready to go because level 3 evacuation are all around me. I'm staying at an Airbnb with my 2 birds.

The smoke is so bad and ash is reaching my area.

I am keeping them safe from the smoke in the basement of the Airbnb.

What can I do to protect them from smoke if we evacuate? They're already in travel cages.

Edit:

Thank you all for the advice.

I am currently deciding to stay put since no evacuation for my area has been sent.

I am literally surrounded by 4 fires in every direction. And traffic is stuck. There really is no way out right now.

UPDATE:

I saw a couple comments asking for an update.

My birds, my husband and I are all safe. We're still sheltering at the Airbnb; the host was kind enough to allow our family to stay too if they needed it.

We were in the middle of moving when all this happened, and so we're kind of stuck right now because our new place is in the evacuation zone. Here's to hoping the fire does not reach it.

Thanks again everyone for all the concern and advice.