Does anyone else have a distinct memory where they were when OCD hit them in life, almost as in flipping a switch?
I have a very clear memory of being 9 years old when I felt like my OCD quite literally began in an instant. I was in my mom’s bathtub in her room watching something on her tv that I angled towards the tub, when I got the INTENSE feeling of impending doom. The worst feeling I’d ever felt in my entire life, just horrendous guilt. The thing I felt so horrible about was watching clips from the Chucky movie on YouTube. I have always been really into scary stuff and had briefly explored on YouTube, but I suddenly felt so horrible that the clips that I had seen had inappropriate concepts / curse words. I literally felt so intensely anxious and guilty instantly.
I think I tried to sit with it for a few days but I had this intense urge to confess that I had seen this chucky clips to my mom. Eventually I couldn’t handle it and I confessed to both my parents sobbing like three days later. Ever since then it’s been a battle, now I am 20 and my OCD has shifted to many different themes throughout the years and I think I handle it better now. But I remember that moment so vividly. Like a literally switch went off in my brain. I no longer was a carefree child and felt like a slave to my own brain.
Just wondering if anyone else has something similar to this experience? Like a distinct memory of the moment that your OCD hit them like a truck?