r/AskMenOver30

Does anyone else feel like they’re constantly cleaning?

38M, no wife, no kids. I live alone with a dog in a pretty small house, and somehow I am always behind on cleaning.

No matter how often I clean, the place seems to hover around a 6/10 most days. Occasionally I can get it to an 8/10 if I go absolutely commando on it for a few hours, but then a day or two later I’m right back where I started.

It actually takes a toll on my mindset. Clutter, dust, dog hair, dishes, laundry, wiping things down, baseboards, floors, whatever. There is always something.

I don’t consider myself a slob either. I straighten up constantly and probably spend at least some time cleaning every day. But I’m starting to feel like I could spend my entire life cleaning up after myself.

Does anyone else experience this? At what point do you just say fuck it and accept that your house is never going to be perfectly clean?

And yes, I know I could hire a cleaning service, but even then I feel like the place has to be reasonably picked up before they can actually clean it.

If I join it would be as an officer.

I am CM in residential construction (Bay Area) make about $160k before bonus. Have okay medical but I am tired of the constant stress and 55+ hour weeks. I have a college degree and field experience as an electrician before I moved to CM.

I have two kids on a single income and bought a house a last year and about $10k left in student loans.

I see a lot of advice online about people who "just joined" in their 30s but not much context of what was life like 10 years afterwards.

I have been looking at careers on their webpage and what makes sense would be logistics given my background.

I just want to hear your advice or your stories on joining and work life balance after joining, financial attainment, healthcare, full active vs reserve. My kids are young so would like to not move a lot i'm in California. I dont have a rich social life after kids its mostly work and games/birthdays on the weekends, too tired to do much else so I would like a career where I am not drained every weekend and where I can take my PTO without coming back to a larger pile of work.

I'm 37 decided to divorce my wife

I don't have anyone and can't even share on reddit because most of the times i try it just gets deleted for whatever reason. So thank you for reading in advance.

She felt pure contempt for me, couldn't stand me and disrespected me on a daily basis. I've tried everything to solve it, it didn't work, so now we're pass that.

I can't stand life anymore after this, i gave everything for that, i really did go all in and couldn't imagine myself out of that life. I had nothing before her too, i've been some sort of loner my whole life and when i found her she convinced me of many things, i created expectations, i made incredible plans for the future, i made sure to demonstrate affection and love every single day, i didn't know what to do anymore so i had to end it.

The thing is, it's absolutely hopeless for me. Not because i can't find anyone, it's simply because i don't want to find anyone, this was a one shot, one i was certain would last forever, i don't even know what to do now.

Hopefully you don't see me as simply someone trying to be a victim, i'm just really in an existencial free fall. Even though i've always been some idiot who just read existential literary crap my whole life that probably helped me to be down already, it felt like there was still some mystery for the future and i had already accepted, back then, that i would never get married. Then i changed my mind and this happened, i think this thing will end up killing me, somehow.

TL;DR i'm just in melacoly because of divorce

I'm 31 and I'm having a hard time accepting where my life is right now.

I still live with my parents in the small town where I grew up. I've basically spent my adult life doing seasonal jobs, I have no degree, almost no social life and my long-term relationship is ending.

I constantly feel like everyone else started building their adult life years ago while I stayed in the same place.

The weird part is that I don't actually want something extraordinary. I want fairly ordinary things: to live somewhere I like, have some friends, work toward a career, travel, meet people, have relationships, feel like I'm actually participating in my own life.

I've spent years telling myself that I'll change something "next season", "next month", "when I feel better", etc. And now I'm 31 and realizing how much time has passed.

So I'd really like to hear from men who were genuinely stuck in their late 20s/early 30s and eventually changed direction.

Not success stories where you already had a degree, career and social network.

I'm interested in the messy ones:

• What was your situation when you finally decided enough was enough?
• What did you actually do first?
• What changed your life more: moving, changing jobs, meeting new people, therapy, taking a risk, something else?
• Did you ever feel like you had "missed your window"?
• What do you wish you had done at 25 or 30?

I'm not looking for motivation. I'd really like to hear from people who have actually been through a similar "I wasted too much time and don't know how to restart" phase.

Getting 30 and struggling to get out of entry level hell, I've been wondering how you guys have been able to get ahead and change careers. I've been stuck in hospitality and restaurants for a while it's been aggravating to say the least.