r/Brides

Hi all!

Just had my wedding last Friday. It was magical. I hired a makeup artist who did an epic job on my hair.

I don’t wear much face makeup - just my concealer, blush, my own way since I’ve been wearing makeup.

I had my trial and my makeup was okay, but hired her anyway because of my amazing hair. I knew I could switch my makeup myself and said that was my backup. Her team did a great job on my bridesmaid and mom.

My mua said she was doing my makeup for photography. And I didn’t care about photos really - bc I knew I’d look good with my own makeup anyway and wanted more to look good in person.

After doing my makeup, I looked in the mirror and just felt wrong. My fam and friends told me it looked good, and maybe it did kind of, but I knew it should look better. My family and friends are also very honest but still didn’t sway me to change it until I did!

Luckily my mau left at noon and I walked at 3:30 for my ceremony. At the last second in my bridal suite I knew if I didn’t wipe it off, I’d be uncomfortable all day.

So that’s what I did. Game-time decision, wipe off all the face makeup. Put my concealer and blush on. Felt a trillion times better. And looked stunning in my own face makeup. Photography still looks incredible (even better honestly).

So my tips to my brides who don’t wear much face makeup: have mua do your eyes and lips, and do your own face makeup. OR have the mua do it all, but have buffer time with the mua not there to change it if you are not feeling it. Or just do your makeup yourself.

Another tip was get a lash lift and tint! Get one months ahead by an artist to test her out and make sure you react well to the lift chemicals. Then get one my the same person a few days before. My eyes looked excellent and no mascara needed or false lashes. And I don’t have a ton of lashes either :).

Hope this helps all the brides who have that pit in their stomach when they see their makeup on wedding day and feel uncomfortable! You have permission to change it! I’m so glad I did!!!!!

I literally don’t know what to do. Yes I can sue and whatever, but in my country that’s not really effective and anyway that does not get me a photographer for literally this Saturday. Anyone had a similar situation? How did you handle it?

I’m trying to figure out the overall style for my wedding, and I keep going back and forth.
There are so many wedding trends I genuinely like right now, but I’m worried I’ll look back at the photos in 10 or 20 years and think, “Why did I choose that?” 😅
At the same time, I don’t want to spend a huge amount just trying to make everything look super polished or “timeless.” I’d rather put the budget toward a few things that actually make a difference and keep the rest pretty simple.
I’m considering styles like classic, romantic, garden, or something a little more modern, but I’m not sure which direction would age well without needing a massive decor budget.
For those of you who already got married, what style did you choose? What was actually worth spending money on, and what could you keep simple without regretting it later?
If you’re comfortable sharing, I’d also love to see some of your wedding photos for inspiration. I think it would really help me see what actually looks good and holds up over time.

I seriously am so pissed. I just got my dress back after 4 weeks of it being in the seamstress’ possession. She used to be Amish and I thought she would be responsible and dependable enough with my dress. WRONG. Some kind of blue marker down the side of it where the seam is, and brown spots almost resembling fingerprints under the arms where she took it in on both sides. There’s also blue marker under the train which will be visible when I’m carrying it the wrist loop.
On top of that, it smells like an old persons house. Not a good smell. It smells awful and I should’ve thought of that immediately when deciding to let a seamstress work on my dress out of her home.
She was also supposed to let it out after taking it in too much, because at my last fitting it was too tight. I have not gained any weight. I don’t know how to tell if she let some of it back out or not. But it sure does not feel like she let anything back out. Unfortunately, I have already paid her before noticing the smell or the flaws on my dress.
I’m FREAKING out not knowing how to get rid of the smell, since the garment bag also smells bad.
I live with my fiance and there’s really no where I can put the dress that will allow it to air out some of the scent, where he won’t see it. Wedding is in 3 days

My fiancé and I are getting married next year. since we’re not well off and neither is our family, we had to compromise on what to save and splurge on.

Is it my dream to have an open bar for guests? Yes! But is it absolutely necessary? No!

Instead of the open bar, we decided that each table will have a bottle of liquor and we can have some self serve beer/wine and other types of liquor available on the side for those who want it.

As wedding planning goes, people are constantly asking what we plan on doing, are there plus ones, etc.

A few days ago, it came up that we will not be having an open bar. To which one of my cousins called “tacky”.

Is it customary now to have a bartender and open bar at weddings? Did I miss the memo? It’s not like we’re asking people to pay for their own drinks. We will still be providing everything. We just don’t have the budget to hire bartenders and have open bar. For a wedding of our size and where we live, it could cost well over $10,000.

We did budget around $3000 for alcohol, though I’m willing to spend more if needed. Just not $10,000 more! I would say about half our guests either don’t or can’t drink either, so that would be wasted money. Of the drinkers, a majority just take shots. So what is the need for special cocktails and drinks that only 10% of guests will actually drink?

My cousin proceeded to suggest cutting down the guest list and saying she will pregame in the car.

Do people just not enjoy weddings anymore? Has it become a reason to get drunk?

Please let me know what i’m supposed to do in this situation. Do I rearrange the budget to a get the open bar? Or do I just ignore her opinion and do what I originally planned?

Hey all,
I just need an outside perspective to make myself feel better about this situation. My fiance and I have been engaged over 6 months, and he recently has decided to enlist in the military. When this was decided, he discussed with his family he wanted to be married before he leaves. They instantly said no and that they didn’t support it, rattled off some stuff about me that wasn’t true, and basically said they wanted nothing to do with us getting married. They also weren’t excited about our engagement, but kind of accepted that as it was. I have some stories about my future MIL and the crazy stuff she’s done, but I won’t go into that right now.
We decided we still want to get married regardless and are signing papers at the county recorder, and my parents are coming out for it in 3 days. Honestly, the only thing that’s bugging me is the anxiety surrounding his family not knowing. We don’t plan on telling them, we just plan on having a wedding ceremony/reception after he is done with tech school. I’m going back and forth between a mindset of guilt and are we doing the right thing, and a different mindset of if they find out, I guess so be it, but I’m such a worrier. I don’t want it to take away from our day. We also aren’t telling any of my extended family members because word gets around fast and we don’t want anyone questioning our later ceremony.
Is anyone else having a completely private/unknown wedding or had one? Any future/current military spouses? (I also have anxiety because there is so much unknown right now with the military part of it).
Thanks ahead of time

My fiancé and I need help planning our ceremony/ceremonies.

Some part of me is worried I’m going to regret not having a Catholic ceremony. But my fiancé really wants to have an outdoor ceremony. We booked a reception venue that has an on site ceremony space because I originally said that a Catholic ceremony didn’t matter too much to me. Recently my parents pulled the guilt trip routine when I said that we may not have the ceremony in the church.
It’s been causing A LOT of anxiety to say the least and we honestly don’t know what to do. I’ve been doing some thinking and I think I do want a Catholic ceremony. I grew up catholic and I love the idea of walking down the aisle of a beautiful church on my wedding day .
We tried to find a compromise by doing a small Catholic ceremony the day before our wedding but my parents didn’t like that idea. We then have been thinking about doing a Catholic ceremony in the midday then something else at the outdoor ceremony site in the afternoon.
What’s most important to the two of us is that we get to say our own vows to each other. This isn’t possible during the Catholic ceremony. I know having a second ceremony is frowned upon in the Catholic Church but it seems to be the only way to have a wedding day that we are both happy with.
My question is, how do we make both ceremonies meaningful. My fiancé brought up a good point that if we are just repeating similar events in the second ceremony but with our own vows that it might just be meaningless. Do I walk down the aisle the same way I would in the morning at the church? Do we have the bridal party and groomsmen involved in both? Is it silly to entertain the idea that we could do both?

I’m genuinely curious — how many wedding dresses did you try on before you found *the one*?
I’ve heard completely opposite stories. Some brides know after trying on 2–3 dresses, while others go through 20, 30, or even more before they feel sure.
And I wonder if there’s a point where trying on more actually makes the decision harder rather than easier.

How many did you try? And looking back, do you think it was the right amount?

I started to write this as a comment, but seeing an influx of confused, stressed and disappointed brides here, I thought I can share my two cents about the wedding industry from a perspective of a planner. I am writing anonymously, because my goal is not self promotion, it’s sharing the observations I have and starting a conversation that is long overdue.

I am copying my og comment here, in hopes to give clarity to everyone struggling with vendors atm.

“Hey as a planner seeing the industry in big trouble I can maybe give you my perspective. I actually agree that there’s something rotten, in all areas not just with planners. I have been in the industry long enough to witness first hand the shift that happened.

Sometime after COVID we got an influx of new vendors (mostly in the photo category, but it can also be seen in other categories), at the same time there was a lot of mentorship programs going on basically telling inexperienced vendors they can charge insane amounts of money for their services, even though the knowledge is not there.

Vendors were told they need to live the luxe style, dress the part and act like they’re millionaires. The truth is, maybe 1% of wedding vendors worldwide are truly that successful, and those people have years and years of experience.
Scaring tactics to the clients was used as a selling point, so was hiding of the price of the service.
In this era I have rarely seen someone mentor vendors how to actually get better at their job. It was mostly sales and life coaching.

Around 2022 all you could hear was “charge the number that makes you feel uncomfortable”. You can see the shift happening here, everyone slapped Luxury to their business names as if that is enough to be considered high end.

Some also started to do a ton of styled shoots that they were selling as real weddings to prove their “Luxury“ status.

Most paid for publications and awards so it seems to you that they’re worth the price tag. The clients believed them, not knowing that while all of that has been done, the real experience was just not there.

A couple of years ago the standards from clients were lower, brides were not connected as they are today and a lot of bad business practices got unnoticed.
Cancel culture was also not in full swing then.

Around 2024 things were turning, bad vendors get called out and canceled, couples want to know where their money is going and how it’s being managed. That is fair and should be standard.

Now in 2026 I am noticing everything
becoming extreme, the vendors behaviors getting out of hand (i think it’s burn out and just lack of knowledge) but also the clients thinking all of their vendors are basically the enemy and trying to rob them (understandably).

I am seeing a lot straight up harassment from both sides (vendors and clients) and i am seeing burnout from both sides as well.

There’s a lack of trust and humanity in the process, lack of good business practices and overall a great lack of understanding.

I see both clients and vendors asking for mental health help and therapy because they’re feeling anxiety and depression.
Nothing wrong with asking for help ofc, but it’s telling how toxic the industry actually is.

I feel like we’re approaching a point where the industry is going to burst and we will all need to adapt or find new careers.

Don’t get me wrong there’s a ton of fairly priced, experienced vendors in the industry, but it’s hard for the clients to figure out who’s the og and who’s a fraud since there’s so many of us.

Things are so out of hand that when an amazing photographer with experience is quoting 6-7k for their services, the clients see it as a red flag because all the other quotes they got were 20k+.
Not knowing that the 7k one has more experience and is easier to work with.
Obviously this is not a case every time, but it actually is a thing that happens a lot.

I can tell you from my own experience, I was trying to be Luxe as well (without actually adding the title because I found it cringe). I thought I was doing something wrong because I did not want to pay for life coaching, publications etc.

I tried to justify bad behavior from colleagues and sometimes even clients, as a normal thing that is going to eventually make me worth the luxe title.
I know no one is here to hear my sob story, but at one point after a high budget wedding I had a legit panic attack mid season. It did not feel right.
It was then and there where I decided I want to work with vendors and clients on events with a soul. Mix the smaller, mid and bigger budgets, and leave the weddings not with a panic attack, but with a smile on my face.
I realized there a paid Vogue publication, status and how Luxe my social media looks, is not telling anything about me.
The fact I care and have 10 years of experience is telling something.

I hope all of you reading this, a vendor or a bride will do the same. Hire or book the people that actually make you happy and excited, even if it takes longer to find those. You are all spending too much energy and time to feel the way some of you feel. Weddings are happy occasions, the industry was once beautiful and there’s still beauty underneath all the negativity.

Sorry for the rambling but i think these are the conversations we all should be having at this point.

PS. I feel like that character in Mean girls that doesn’t even go to the school but is there to promote love lol”

Next September Venue booked, photographer booked video keeps sliding down the list every time we sit down with the spreadsheet are we late ?

Hi!
I get married 08.07.2027.
I’m looking for some registry ideas — things you were glad people bought / or any you didn’t think of!
TYIA