r/LifeAfterSchool

Just graduated a few weeks ago. May 15th to be exact.
Throughout school I was very disciplined, ate clean, hit the gym daily, had friends, had a regular job and life was pretty good.
Over the past few weeks it feels like my life has fallen apart. For starters, I renewed my lease in my college town because rent was so cheap. So I've already been feeling like stuck. Then I lost my job about a week after I graduated, and have been eating horrible fast food daily, barely hitting the gym. I have been doing DoorDash to just get by, and applying for loads of jobs online with no responses.
I just feel like my life instantly fell apart, and I need to get it back asap before | let myself go, I've already gained a few pounds, and my motivation tanked to do anything besides DoorDash.
Any advice...

I’m thinking about what degree I want to do at uni and i’m stuck between two paths (geography or computer science)
They're such different subjects which would lead me to different things I guess that it's made me wonder how people actually figure out what they want to do with their lives.

So I'm curious:

Did you always know what career you wanted, or did you end up doing a complete 180 later in life? If so, how did it work out?

If you did a degree that you didn't really enjoy, what did you do afterwards? Did you stay in that field, switch careers, or go back and study something else?

And for those of you who did know what you wanted to do, how did you know? Did you always have that passion, or was it something you discovered over time?

I feel like there's so much pressure to choose the "right" degree at 18, so I'd really appreciate hearing other people's experiences

I’m 20F and moved abroad about 6 months ago. It’s been a mix of excitement, loneliness, and trying to figure life out. I don’t really have friends here yet, but academically I’m doing well.
About a month ago I met a guy, and on my birthday I invited for a movie since he’s like the only friend I’ve had since I got here. We spent the night together, but we didn’t have sex because I told him I wasn’t ready, and he completely respected that. I’m still a virgin.
The thing is, I can’t seem to stop thinking about him. I don’t even know if it’s him I miss, or if it’s the feeling of finally having someone around after being so lonely. He texted me though which I replied formally and the last message he sent I didn’t reply to it.
I’m also trying to navigate life as a new 20-year-old, living in a different country and finding my place. Has anyone been through something similar? How did you deal with the loneliness and all these emotions without losing yourself?
I’d really appreciate any advice.

Hi!

I’m in my mid to late twenties, just finished medical school & am moving back home (to London).

I will be contributing by paying rent (slightly lower than market value), but still significant enough to help my mum who’s now a single parent , I have 2 siblings who are 17 & 18. I’ll be working full time & am moving home to save up for about 2 years.

I’m nervous to move back because I’ve done 8 years of uni in total, and have gotten used to living out.

Does anyone have any advice on how to go about ensuring I maintain as much of my independence as possible??

Even things such as food shopping, cooking dinner, chores etc - what’s the best way to go about it?

I was thinking I’d be happy to cook dinner 2x a week ( & we plan ahead and do the food shopping together for those meals) but then to do my food shopping separate otherwise? Will do my own laundry, and I wanted to make a cleaning rota…

Also, I’m the first born daughter who grew up carrying too much responsibility in the home & im conscious of not slipping back into that whilst still being fair and useful at home.

Any thoughts or advice would be much appreciated!

Hey Reddit, I have been postponing locking in onto career stuff. I’m completely new to everything. I have a bachelors in computer science what should I be doing as a recent graduate? I naively would love to work for Google or Apple. Is big tech even considerable right now?

People aged 30+, what do you wish you had done more of in your early 20s that you can't easily do now?

I really don’t like the city I was raised in. I (23) need advice. My parents don’t help me with anything financially anymore, really since I was first year university. They have the money to buy just care about their own retirement (whole other issue).
I was on contract and decided to leave my student house with my friends to move back home since I am around 30k in student debt. I am so sad about moving back home. My uni was 5 hours away and I loved that city dearly and my friends there. I just graduated with a psychology degree and I have about a years work experience doing admin at a law firm. I have been home since May and absolutely hate it here. I feel bad cause my parents want me to like it and I am closer to my boyfriend, but I hate it and feel like I am back in high school. Is it a bad idea to move out again, even tho I just moved back and try to find a place around 1k a month for me and my cat? Or do I try to rough it here for a bit and save? My work offered me to get off contract but I only make around 44k and have been mass applying in other cities too. I want to have a bright future and travel and maybe move abroad one day, but I need to get out of debt so I can start my life, but being here is so draining😑

Hi everyone I’ve been having a really hard time thinking about graduating (I graduate spring 2027 from my undergrad). I hate that there’s no structure for post grad and adult life. That there’s no guarantee I’ll get a job I’ll like there’s no guarantee I’ll find the love of my life. I’m scared for what’s coming. I am passionate about so many things but hate the unknown of it all!

I love writing and designing (everything from fabrics to graphics). I love entertainment and media! I live in NYC and am currently interning at a bank and hatttting that everyone keeps telling me I suit marketing. I don’t want a desk job (no hate to desk jobs) I want something that I want to do! Does that make sense? My dream would be to maybe write a book series or tv show, I have a few ideas but the world of writing is so undervalued and the jobs aren’t lucrative enough to keep me in the city.

I’m 24. Since I was a kid, I’ve always wanted to dedicate myself to something I genuinely enjoyed and become really good at it. I played football in primary school, throughout middle and high school I got into martial arts, I loved photography and filmmaking, and I wanted to travel and see the world. I always liked learning new skills. But for one reason or another, I always stopped before giving any of them a real chance.

I graduated with a Chemical Engineering degree almost two years ago. You see, growing up in the Middle East, studying was a huge part of life. Or at least what they tell you to do if you want to be something. Ever since I remember, I always went to school at 6 in the morning and got out at three, studied until 6, squeezed 2-3 hours of what I felt like doing. It didn’t help going into uni picking one of the hardest engineering degrees out there.

When I graduated, it felt like it was summer but with no end. It was fun while it lasted, but then like every honeymoon, it was coming to an end and the weight of responsibility started catching up. Then I came to the realisation that I’ve been studying for so long I haven’t thought about what I liked in a while, so I started thinking what I enjoy and if I even still enjoy the things that I did 6 or 8 years ago.** **It felt like I’d hit pause. Since graduating, I’ve spent more time thinking about what I should dedicate my life to than actually dedicating myself to anything.

Looking back, I realised something.

If I’d spent just an hour a day during the last two years doing any of the things I’ve been thinking about, I’d probably know by now which ones I genuinely enjoy, and which ones simply aren’t for me.

Instead, I spent those two years trying to figure it out before even starting, when the only way I could’ve ever figured it out was by starting.

So that’s what I’m doing now. I’m starting.

And I will be documenting the entire journey not because I know how it goes, but because I’m figuring it out. I’ll be learning the same way most people do: YouTube, books, Reddit, asking questions, approaching people who know more than I do, making mistakes, and figuring things out as I go.

This post is part of that.

If you’ve ever dedicated years of your life to becoming good at something, anything, it being a sport, filmmaking, photography, business, music, climbing, writing, or anything.

What did the beginning actually look like?

What nearly made you quit?

And what’s something you wish someone had told you if you were where I am today? I want to hear from real people, not billionaires and millionaires doing street interviews.

My 17 tear old nephew is a standout football player at his high school. He starts his senior year in August. He has been fortunate enough to receive multiple D1 offers, a few Ivy offers and even Naval Academy and West Point.
He has carried a 4.0 his entire life. He naturally has the mathematical/mechanical brain.

He is a fun kid, never been in any trouble but he has been internalizing his future. He seems to be overly worried for some reason. Maybe it is because he doesn't have a solid plan mapped out just yet? His football brothers are ahead of him in recruitment - he was out for camps and trainings all last summer due to shoulder surgery. He is about 4 months behind his teammates on anything college recruitment related.

All of that to set the tone of where he is right now. I just wondered if any of you had any advice or anything that can possibly have a profound affect on him. Sometimes, someone says something that sticks with us. Thanks in advance.

I’m 27 and currently finishing a law degree while already having a master’s in finance and a BBA. I’ve worked at a small consulting firm, spent some time in my dad’s business, and done a few internships, including in law.
On paper, things seem fine. I have qualifications, some experience, and some financial safety through investments I’ve made over the years.
But I honestly have no idea where I’m heading. I don’t feel particularly interested in finance, law, consulting, or the family business. Meanwhile, friends are getting married, settling into careers, and seem much more certain about life.
Has anyone else felt this way in their late 20s? Did direction eventually come with time, or did you have to actively create it?

Hi everyone! New to this subreddit and don't know if this is even the right place for something like this, but I am a young adult and struggling!!! :D

I don't know where to even begin, but I guess I'll start by just saying I need advice. I'm a 20-year-old male, living at home with my parents and not in any higher education at this moment, though I do have my high school diploma and some college credits. I work and have been working, but I'm not making much because my jobs have all been part-time and entry-level positions (california min wage is 16.50/hr). I was earning 20/hr at a fast food job I was at for about a year and a half, but quit due to how miserable it made me. Now I'm a busboy/host at a restaurant in the downtown area of my city.

Life after high school has been.. weird. To be fair, though, life IN high school was weird. I was never able to keep a friend group or a girlfriend, but I always had both. Relationships would start, and we'd date for a year or two, then break up, and everything would go to shit, and the friend group would go with it. I never actually took the time to introspect on why and realize that I was part of the problem, so I just kept up the cycle, bouncing around and destroying friendships and relationships with drug and alcohol abuse. My last girlfriend and I broke up about a year and a half ago. The pain was so bad that I decided I didn't want to engage in relationships until I figured out what went wrong and how to prevent it in the future, so I've been on a path of self-discovery and reflection, and here I am now! Single for a year and a half, working on myself, and finally (~95%) sober!! Only been a couple of months without anything hard, and I'll have an occasional drink, but I don't like how I feel when I do, so I might just fully bite the bullet and go 100% straight edge. But this has led to a rift in most of my friendships, as all my friends ever wanna do is go out and party. And I'm struggling to meet new people, even though I don't consider myself socially inept or someone who has ever struggled making friends. I just haven't been able to meet anyone. I try to talk to people at work, but it's all so surface-level, and I don't see it going anywhere past small talk. I used to meet people at parties or through my current friends, but now that I don't really engage in degeneracy, I don't have anything in common with the people I'd meet, with the common factor previously being getting fucked up together. So I guess I'm struggling to see what connection is past that, I guess.

I do have a band, and we're all pretty close! 3 people, not including me, and we are all somewhat on the same thought process. All used to be big partyers, but have straightened up a bit to focus on the music and our lives in general, so I'm not completely alone! I see these people being in my life for the foreseeable future. I truly do love them like brothers. Yet I still want to meet new people and just don't know how.

Past that is education and a career, I'm lost there, too. All I've ever cared about for a long time was getting drunk/high and making music, but I've lost or am losing passion for both of those things. I still love music, but I want more in life than to be a broke, struggling musician, and I was never that great at anything in school other than English or creative writing, which I did decently at and toy around with pursuing from time to time, but it isn't something I'm passionate about to go through with. I've considered blue-collar, office jobs, healthcare, everything, but nothing is speaking to me. I feel as though if I just pick something, I'm capable enough to mold myself into it, but I'm just struggling with those first few steps.

Anyways this whole long-winded post is basically a mild cry for help and some vent to compartmentalize the issues I'm struggling with. I truly do think I'll be okay if I just take action rather than life passing me by. I have every support system and a decent head on my shoulders; I just need a push in the right direction. Any and all advice is appreciated and would be a major help. Thank you to anyone who even read this, as it makes me feel just a little less alone.

I did terribly throughout my high school career due to depression that I feel I’ve had my whole life and I’ve only just recently been diagnosed.
My current GPA is a 77 unweighted and 80 weighted. (2.3-2.7) which I know is really bad, especially for getting into a decent school. I also failed chemistry and had to go to summer school for credit recovery.
I have a 1400 SAT score but I don’t know how much that could help me.
I’m not really involved in school or outside of school except for maybe one club and community service at my local church.
I’m interested in majoring in a STEM related major, specifically computer science or software engineering since I have a huge passion for coding and I just love everything about computers. I have small projects I started to show this but they’re not super big.
I’m looking into schools in New York State so any recommendations are great. Also, would applying undecided help? And what are thoughts on doing a year of community college and transferring.. and ideas for small projects to do. I just want to be able to do whatever I can to succeed. Next year is my senior year and I’ll try my best but it probably won’t do much on my GPA.

i guess im trying to get a feel for where i should be atm. for context, i just graduated HS (17, early grad) and im planning to start online school in the fall if they get me in enrolled in the fall. my mom has always had high standards for me, so i dont know if this is one of those times or if im actually falling behind.

I have a job where i work about 20 hours a week, but until im in school, that’s all i have until the fall starts, but my mom keeps pushing me to get a second job. this all climaxed when she was trying to give me driving lesson, we got into an argument bc i was struggling and got overwhelmed, and she insisted i either go to trade school or get another job so i can ‘tell everyone to fuck off like i want to.‘ i really dont know if she was just upset or if im actually behind. i really dont wanna be behind.

My husband and I are finishing up training that has taken 13 years and are finally looking for jobs. I'm very very close with my mom who's been here for us, helping us with our 3 kids (age 1.5, 3, and 6) for sometimes months at a time the whole way through (and then moves back to places far away for the winters and summers, so she's never been permanently close by). My mom was saying she'd try to move wherever we settle down, which I would love because our kids are so close with her and so am I. Fortunately for her she met a guy her age (71) this past fall and is really smitten over him, so now that whole plan changed. She's planning on moving down south to be near/with him to a very small town. My sister lives 2h from there, which is so nice for them that they'd be close to each other.

I get along well with my sister, but she is very pre-occupied with vanity, "keeping up with the Jones's", has her kids in a million activities, and has a busy social life in that area. She would never include me and my husband in if we were there. We get along well but she hasn't really been an inclusive older sibling to the point I'd want to move somewhere to be near her (I'd still see her twice a year).

Now we're at a crossroads where we can finally look for jobs and I'm getting pressure from my mom and sister to move to the state that my mom's moving to and my sister lives in. The problem is I don't want to settle in that area at all!! I don't want to live in that political climate, it's sweltering hot, buggy, I don't have a single friend there (and can't rely on my sister for social inclusion at all if I transplant there). I'd rather live near my best friend in CO if I had to pick. But I hate the thought of never seeing my mom anymore as she goes from 70 to 80. I'm so torn. We've worked so hard through training to finally live where we want and family is important but ... if my mom is choosing to leave, why do I have to follow?

rn, I just don't feel like talking to anyone. Ayoko lumabas, ayoko makisalamuha. I just want to stay in my room, scroll through my phone the whole day, and shut the world out. Ang hirap ipaliwanag ng pakiramdam na parang nawalan ka na lang ng gana sa lahat.

Hindi ko alam kung saan nagsimula o kung ano ba talaga ang dahilan. Maybe it's because of everything that's been happening lately. Maybe I'm disappointed in myself. O baka dahil pakiramdam ko wala akong maibigay na tulong kina Mama. Ang dami kong expectations sa sarili ko, ang dami kong pangakong akala ko matutupad ko. Pero ngayon, parang isa-isa silang nawawala.

I thought I was capable of doing so much more. I thought after graduation, things would slowly fall into place. Pero eto ako ngayon—stuck. Watching days go by while feeling like I'm not moving at all.

Ang pinakamasakit, gusto kong magsimula. Gusto kong kumilos. Gusto kong baguhin 'tong sitwasyon ko. Pero every night, I tell myself, "Bukas na lang. Tomorrow I'll do better." Then tomorrow comes, and I still can't bring myself to do anything. It's like my mind wants to move, but my body just won't.

Sobrang frustrating kasi kahit sarili ko, hindi ko matulungan. I know what I should do, but I don't have the strength to actually do it. And that makes me feel even more disappointed in myself.

I don't know what's happening to me anymore. Hindi ko na kilala yung sarili ko. I miss the version of me who had so much hope, so much drive, and so many dreams. I just hope that someday, I'll find my way back to her.

Hey, 17M, I graduated alone and I guess I’m just sharing this because I don’t have anyone to celebrate with, but yea congrats to me I guess ^^

Hi!

So I'm a senior in undergrad right now with a major in journalism. I have a 3.9 gpa and am studying for the LSAT. Having just started taking it, I am getting very average scores (154 the very first full test) so am planning to keep studying.

But part of me is thinking a gap year may be the wiser decision. I had hesitated because I was worried about being able to get back into the swing of academia again, but I am interested in doing something with environmental law. I want to grow a bit more of a base understanding in science if I did so (I already have some background but not much) and also to just save some money.

For the people who took gap years, what did you do? And if there's anyone with environmental science in their ledger, legal or otherwise, what might be a good way outside of an academic institution to get ahead on that, since I'll probably take science classes on the side in law school.

Thanks in advance!!