r/YoungAdultStruggles

I don’t want to make this post too long but basically I’m a 26 year old guy who’s a kiss less virgin. The crazy part is, I feel like i have good qualities. I take care of myself and appearance, i have my own life and friends, i think I’m adventurous and have a good personality.

I can interact and socialize with woman just fine. In fact I’ve been invited to group hangouts by woman before, so I don’t think I’m off putting. But Ive never gotten those types of signals that hint that a girl is into you.(lingering around, prolonged eye contact, adding to flirtation, or initiating contact) All throughout school and throughout jobs I’ve had, I’ve seen people date and get into relationships and it just seems like it happens so naturally for them. One of my close friends gets a decent amount of attention from woman, and the crazy part is he doesn’t act and do anything wildly different than I do, and he is a reserved person.

Anytime Ive been interested in a woman I always felt like I was the one initiating all interactions and putting more overall effort into conversations. This made me feel like they weren’t interested so I backed off. I don’t expect a woman to make the first move but I just want to feel like my presence is valued if that makes sense? Like I see how woman act around guys they like and theres a level of engagement that i feel that I don’t get. I don’t wanna do dating apps. I don’t think I’m ugly but I’m 5”7 and have a boyish face and I feel like this is a factor. I know a guy doesn’t need to be a super model but it feels like if you don’t meet a certain looks threshold your invisible.

I’m starting to feel like this part of my life will never change. I wanna have that special someone to share my life with but its hard to feel like it will happen when it seems woman don’t ever give me much thought. I know my worth isn’t determined by what woman think of me but it sucks to not feel wanted that way. At this point a relationship feels like a fantasy. Like very foreign. How are people finding someone that makes them a priority, spends time doing mundane things together, and have physical and emotional intimacy with? Is anyone else in the same boat?

Hey guys, can someone give me some advice?

I’m turning 22 soon, and honestly, I really want to change my life and get myself out of poverty. I’ve had two part-time jobs even before I graduated, and I’m still working now, but the pay isn’t that high.

Sometimes I look at other people and wonder, “How did they get to the point where they can afford the things they want?” I want that too. I want to be financially comfortable, experience the good things in life, and not always have to worry about whether I can afford something.

I also really want to travel. I haven’t even been outside my country yet, and I’d love to see the world someday.
For those of you who were once in a similar situation but eventually became financially successful—what did you do? Did you start a business, invest, learn a specific skill, change careers, or just slowly build your way up?

I’m not looking for a get-rich-quick scheme. I genuinely want to know what worked for you and what you wish you had started doing in your early 20s.

I’m 21 and I feel like I have so much to learn. Any honest advice would mean a lot. ❤️

For context I am a 20yo female and he is 22yo male. We have been going out for a year and have been seeing each other for roughly a year and a half. My previous boyfriend was bad for watching p£rn and watching naked girls online. My current boyfriend knew this and knew i did not like it. I am a student and we do long distance and see each other roughly every 2 weeks. Apart from when I’m home for holidays.

The other week I seen in his twitter a girls name i didn’t recognise. I was not looking in his phone, we were out drinking and he gave me his phone to search soemthing up and it happened to be on twitter and i clicked on the search bar thinking it was google when it was actually twitter and that’s when i seen it.

The next day i typed up this girl and found out she was a p£rn ⭐. I confronted him and he lied, saying he didn’t watch her. He kept lying but eventually told the truth. I was really upset. He said he didnt know why he did it, but was so sorry.

After a few days i decided to forgive him. He promised not to do it again, but how do i know that? I can’t get it out my head and don’t know if i ever can.

Can anyone who has been in similar situations give me advice ?

I’m 24 years old and still live with my family. I share a room, so I basically have no privacy. I also lost my car, so right now I take the bus and Uber around. Honestly, I don’t mind doing that, and when I eventually move out of state, I wouldn’t mind relying on public transportation for a while.

I live in the Northeast, btw.

My biggest problem is that every time I start saving money from a job, something goes wrong. I’ll end up unemployed for a month or two and have to use my savings to pay bills or ask a family member for money. Then I’m basically back at zero and have to start all over again.

I don’t have a degree yet, and I don’t have any certifications either. I know what I want out of life, but I feel like I’m stuck in a broke mindset. I also don’t really have any interests right now, for real. Part of me feels like maybe I’ll figure more things out once I move and actually have some independence.

I do have a job right now, and I actually love it. I was rehired at a shoe store, but it’s part-time and seasonal. My mom’s friend is also going to put me on with a public school job, so I’m hoping that could lead to something more stable.

But I actually DO know my number one goal: I want to go to esthetician school, eventually own my own business, and work for myself. That is what I really want to do. I want to build something that's mine.

Before I move out of state, I’ve also been thinking about getting a phlebotomy certification so I can hopefully make more money and save up for esthetician school. I’m wondering if that would be a smart move or if I’d just be spending money/time on something I won’t use long-term.

I’ve also been invited to stay with a friend and her family in Texas. She has a 2-year-old, and I really love being around her, so part of me would honestly love to be closer to her. But I don’t know if actually living with them would be a good fit for me, especially since I’m trying to become independent. I could see myself living in the same city or even the same apartment complex instead of necessarily moving in with them.

And then there’s the whole question of where I should move. 😭

The places I’m considering are Philly, Charlotte, Raleigh/Cary, and Dallas/TX. I keep going back and forth because I don't want to move somewhere just because it sounds good. I want somewhere I can realistically afford, find work, eventually go to esthetician school, and actually build a life.

I’m also about $6k in debt because of a car I had to give back after I lost my job. It messed up my credit, which is another thing stressing me out. My credit is slowly improving, but I’m worried about how I’ll ever get an apartment with a bad credit score.

If I’m able to save enough, I wouldn’t mind putting down a larger security deposit if that would help me get approved. I know I’d have the discipline to keep an apartment once I actually have one. Having my own place and some independence is honestly one of my biggest goals.

I guess what I’m really looking for is advice on what order I should do all of this in.

Should I focus on getting a stable/full-time job first? Get the phlebotomy certification? Pay down the $6k debt? Save for esthetician school? Move first and figure things out there? Stay home longer and save as much as possible? Or move somewhere cheaper and work my way up?

I also struggle with motivation and my moods sometimes completely throw me off track, so I’m trying to figure out how to build actual discipline instead of constantly starting over.

If you were 24 and in my position, what would you do?

I’d especially love advice from people who have moved out on their own, rebuilt their credit, gone to esthetician school, started a beauty business, or moved to Philly, Charlotte, Raleigh/Cary, or Dallas/TX.

I know this is a lot 😂 but I feel like I’m at the point where I REALLY need to make a plan instead of just thinking about changing my life. BE REAL WITH ME PLEASE!!!!!!

For context: I'm newly turned 18 (about a week ago), I live in ON Canada, im a fairly healthy person physically etc etc, so nothing limiting me physically and no disabilities. Ive just turned 18, graduated highschool 2 months ago, Im not going into college/uni, I dont have a job rn, im still living with family, no relationships and like 2 friends. My social skills are shit and im just introverted AF

I come from an arab family, so I'm constantly under pressure and im constantly reminded of how much of a failure I am by my parents and by this age, they expect me to have started working a job, or have entered a top uni and program like engineering or medical etc, which I am doing neither unfortunately.

I just need some guidance on what to do, Im such a bum, i have genuinely no hobbies or anything that interests me crazy. I have no career aspirations, no special skills or attributes. I have thought about apprenticeships and stuff, Ive contacted some and have gotten a response back from a foreman personally, however that was almost 5 weeks ago, and even with 2 follow up emails, he still has not confirmed an interview or something with me.

Any tips/advice/recommendations on ways to make money would be so so appreciated or just any guidance and support, thanks for reading

Hi i know this story might look like some small problem, but i came here just to hear unknown people what they think about my situation and maybe they can give me an advice.
So im 20 yrs and now is the hardest situation in my life cause i told today my parents that i dropped my university and wanna leave my country to try something new and live by myself cause i dont see any future here.
My parents dont belive in me and i can say more nobody belive in me i am sick of listening that i will end up homeless if i leave and i am trying not to be scared i want to find a job in eu and i don care where it can be cause i have eu passport.
An hour ago i left my home to make walk cause i had a horrible talk with my parents and i know that my father want me to go he just make it look like he dont want it.
Deep in my heart i dont want to disappoint them but it is either my happynes or their dreams that will never be true i dont belive in university degrey anymore and i just want to find my place somewhere alone i want to be able to live by myself.
I want to know if there is a country that you can recomand me to start my OWN LIFE and a job to start and in wich i could evolve as a person.
I will be happy if somone will reply because it is my first time using this app.

Tf idk whats happening in my life. Here im trying my best to build my startup and here my love marriage wife is boring out my brains along with my mom.

So what I do, I just go to cafe , sit alone and smoke. Thats it.

Damn it.

Im a 17 yr old college freshman. I graduated HS in May and jumped straight into going to college. I even have a dorm, a meal plan, and roommates. I hate it. I hate it here. I hate the work. I hate the classes. They dont even have the major I want, and I’m just overall stressed out. Mind you I’ve only spent one day here. I’ve only gone to half of my classes. I keep crying and thinking about home, and how i could be with my family instead of all alone with nothing and no one.

I dont have a job, dont have allowance, shit i aint even got a dollar. I owe $1,717 as of September 10th and i have to keep paying that same amount every month. With no job, or allowance, or money. Yeah no I’m fucked and I want to quit. I have until the 21st of august to drop out without any charges made to my account.

Should I drop out, get yelled at by my sister (guardian) for fighting so hard to go to college, just to drop out and work for a year or two, get my ID, Drivers License, make a bank account, and get a taste of Adulthood. Or stay in college, get riddled with debt, not make any friends, suffer, be depressed and broke and incapable to do anything about it and watch my family move away without me bc they are moving.

Orrrr again just stay with my family and stay happy? Like i know everyone gets home sick that first week but, i genuinely don’t think I will last here. If i start college right now I will fail. I don’t know enough about the world yet and if i’m being completely honest I just genuinely don’t think i’m ready. Maybe in like 2 years but definitely not now.

My sister is a pretty strict lady and she was already really upset about me applying to college without telling her and now i wanna turn back around and quit?? Please someone help!!! Do i just sound like a dumb kid who should stay because everyone goes through this? Or should I go? Because i really really really wanna go home..

(P.s. is this too wordy? I really need help.. and no one is responding yet..)

EDIT: I spoke to my HS teacher that helped me get to this point, and she has convinced me to keep going to school. Thank you to whoever actually intended to help me with your comments.

I passed Class 12 (PCB - Physics, Chemistry, Biology) with 68% marks. I completed it about three years ago.
I’m not good at academics, and I have absolutely no interest in the medical field. Instead, I’m a very creative person. I’m passionate about films, entertainment, acting, and design.
I believe I’m good-looking, confident, and naturally introverted.
The reason I haven’t done anything for the last three years is because my family went through a very difficult financial crisis. Someone convinced my father to invest in what seemed like a good business opportunity. He even borrowed money from others to invest, but everything was lost. We had to sell almost everything we owned—our cars, bikes, land, jewelry, and more. We are still dealing with a lot of debt.
Because of this situation, I have mostly stayed in my room for the past three years. We also don’t have a good relationship with most of our relatives. They don’t support us and often make fun of our situation, so I don’t want to depend on them for help.
Right now, I’m confused about what I should do with my life.
I have only completed Class 12 (PCB) with 68%. I’m not interested in traditional studies, and I don’t want to waste my parents’ money on a degree that I don’t enjoy.
My biggest dream is to become an actor because I want to spend my life doing something I genuinely love—not something I feel forced to do. I also enjoy design and other creative work.
My interests are:
Acting & Entertainment – 100%
Design & Creative Field – 80%
Can anyone please guide me?
I’m looking for an affordable career path that allows me to continue pursuing my acting dream while also helping me build a stable source of income. I don’t want to waste my parents’ money, especially considering our financial situation.
Could you suggest:
The best career path for someone like me?
A step-by-step blueprint or roadmap.
Whether I should go to college or not.
Which degree or course would be worth it.
Affordable colleges or institutes.
Admission process.
Approximate fees.
Career opportunities and expected salary.
How I can continue working toward acting while earning a stable income.
I would truly appreciate any genuine advice or guidance. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this.

I’m 24 years old and still live with my family. I share a room, so I basically have no privacy. I also lost my car, so right now I take the bus and Uber around. Honestly, I don’t mind doing that, and when I eventually move out of state, I wouldn’t mind relying on public transportation for a while.

I live in the Northeast, btw.

My biggest problem is that every time I start saving money from a job, something goes wrong. I’ll end up unemployed for a month or two and have to use my savings to pay bills or ask a family member for money. Then I’m basically back at zero and have to start all over again.

I don’t have a degree yet, and I don’t have any certifications either. I know what I want out of life, but I feel like I’m stuck in a broke mindset. I also don’t really have any interests right now, for real. Part of me feels like maybe I’ll figure more things out once I move and actually have some independence.

I do have a job right now, and I actually love it. I was rehired at a shoe store, but it’s part-time and seasonal. My mom’s friend is also going to put me on with a public school job, so I’m hoping that could lead to something more stable.

But I actually DO know my number one goal: I want to go to esthetician school, eventually own my own business, and work for myself. That is what I really want to do. I want to build something that's mine.

Before I move out of state, I’ve also been thinking about getting a phlebotomy certification so I can hopefully make more money and save up for esthetician school. I’m wondering if that would be a smart move or if I’d just be spending money/time on something I won’t use long-term.

I’ve also been invited to stay with a friend and her family in Texas. She has a 2-year-old, and I really love being around her, so part of me would honestly love to be closer to her. But I don’t know if actually living with them would be a good fit for me, especially since I’m trying to become independent. I could see myself living in the same city or even the same apartment complex instead of necessarily moving in with them.

And then there’s the whole question of where I should move. 😭

The places I’m considering are Philly, Charlotte, Raleigh/Cary, and Dallas/TX. I keep going back and forth because I don't want to move somewhere just because it sounds good. I want somewhere I can realistically afford, find work, eventually go to esthetician school, and actually build a life.

I’m also about $6k in debt because of a car I had to give back after I lost my job. It messed up my credit, which is another thing stressing me out. My credit is slowly improving, but I’m worried about how I’ll ever get an apartment with a bad credit score.

If I’m able to save enough, I wouldn’t mind putting down a larger security deposit if that would help me get approved. I know I’d have the discipline to keep an apartment once I actually have one. Having my own place and some independence is honestly one of my biggest goals.

I guess what I’m really looking for is advice on what order I should do all of this in.

Should I focus on getting a stable/full-time job first? Get the phlebotomy certification? Pay down the $6k debt? Save for esthetician school? Move first and figure things out there? Stay home longer and save as much as possible? Or move somewhere cheaper and work my way up?

I also struggle with motivation and my moods sometimes completely throw me off track, so I’m trying to figure out how to build actual discipline instead of constantly starting over.

If you were 24 and in my position, what would you do?

I’d especially love advice from people who have moved out on their own, rebuilt their credit, gone to esthetician school, started a beauty business, or moved to Philly, Charlotte, Raleigh/Cary, or Dallas/TX.

I know this is a lot 😂 but I feel like I’m at the point where I REALLY need to make a plan instead of just thinking about changing my life. BE REAL WITH ME PLEASE!!!!!!

They say you can’t really do much in life unless you find your life interesting like you should do what you’re genuinely interested in. But I’m in my ‘go with the flow’ phase right now (and I’m alr in my 20s), and I feel like I’m missing out on good things.

So how do I figure out what I actually like or what I need?

I live in iran i failed the entrance college exam Strict parent they think every and all money is in education and they want me to study another year for the next exam im 19 i had this big dream of becoming a global rapper for 4 years now i dont know what to do man im stuck
They never believed me they think im fucked while ive always studied and high graded in high school but im tired i feel like a doll thats controlled i feel like dying i think im delula and brain fucked cause of being diff

Recently for the past 3 months ish, ive been feeling really lost and kinda confused about life... I dont know what my purpose is and I dont know what to do. I started a year long internship, and I worked really hard for it, and now I am here, its great, like its a great place to work and everybody is really nice and they have great amenities but. I just keep dropping the ball.... Like I feel like I am always messing up or misunderstanding something and just making mistakes around every corner, and I just feel so bad because I feel like everybody has expectations of me, and I have expectations of me but I am just not living up to any of it. I dont know I just feel so dumb and useless. Has anyone ever felt this way before?? How did you push through it?

I just feel like I wake up everyday to go to my 9-5, and I just keep making mistakes and I feel like the dumb intern who does stupid things, and I look at my peers around me and I feel like everybody just has it figured out. And obviously I know thats not true, but sometimes like man looking at linkedin or just like my engineering friends makes me feel really dumb, unproductive, and like stupid... I dont know its like everybody is so obsessed with productivity and tech and jobs and all these corporate things and I just feel so away from that??? If that makes sense? I feel like well I do like electrical engineering when I am studying, and I liked my courses, I thought they were super interesting.... But now I dont know... All this stuff about getting a huge tech job, and doing a million personal projects, and hackathons and it feels like everybody has to have a million things they have done, and be super smart...... Am i just dumb? Or like I dont know... It all just feels weird...

And I feel like I am ungrateful, because I have this internship, and the content is pretty interesting, and everybody is so nice, and there are so many cool things there and its a great opportunity. But for some reason I come home everyday sad. I don't know why. People would kill for an opportunity like this, and I know I was dying for this a couple months ago. But I just keep messing up. I feel like a screwup and I just keep making mistakes and I dont know how to fix them. I just always am on edge if I am doing everything right or if I messed up. I come into work and I feel so scared and nervous. I am scared to ask questions, or hand things in. And I spend so much time making sure things are right before I hand it in, and somehow I keep making mistakes. Its been 4 months already, I dont know I feel like by now people say they are settled in, and make big contributions. But i havent done anything like that. I am so intimidated by everyone and everything. Everything feels so big and I feel so small.

TLDR: I just feel like I keep making mistakes and losing out on an opportunity Ive always wanted. I wake up everyday confused and lost about my life and what I am meant to do with it. I feel really intimidated by my coworkers and my peers and just the general state of society and tech right now. I feel like every body is moving at 300x speed and I am stuck on 0.5 speed. I just feel stuck. And stupid.

If anybody can help me out with some advice or their experiences or even if someone else feels this way, I would really appreciate it.

I'm honestly kind of lost right now.

I got a degree in a field that doesn't seem to be hiring and am now going back to school for a second bachelors in another field that I'm not really thrilled about. I've never had much of an interest in anything career - oriented, yet I'm always seeing people who are thrilled to be working their dream jobs or internships and look forward to the future.

Sorry this is super depressing but I'm wondering, how can this be acheived? lol. Any and all answers are super appreciated.

Also worth noting that I've had struggles with depression for the past few years and that definitely hasn't helped in figuring out what I want out of life.

Hi!
I am 18 and feel behind on life
I graduated Hs in may and then immediately moved to a new state like 3 days later
I was originally going to do college in my current state but unfortunately couldn’t because of residency and not being able to appeal
I am currently enrolled in 12 credit hours/4classes at my local cc (3 in person classes and one online) I would only need to go in person 2 times a week
I never had a actual job before nor do I have a drivers license (I used to have a drivers permit though)

I have no clue if I’m considered behind or a loser I don’t know I am planning on getting my license and eventually getting a part time job

Hello everyone!

This is my first Reddit post ever. I feel so stuck that I wanted to reach out to other people. I jumped from one career to another for years because i didn’t know what to do and I just chose safe options. Now I am finally in a sector (textile) that I want to continue my career. I’m 32 and obviously at the beginning of my career at textile. I’m learning everything from scratch. Though I enjoy the material just the fact that I’m starting all over is really overwhelming. And I keep finding myself in need of motivation. I keep comparing myself to others. This crippling anxiety about being so behind my peers is really affecting me. Do you have any tips/advice for sb who needs to keep the motivation alive but also get rid of the anxiety of staying behind?

Thanks a lot.

Hi, I need as many people as possible to genuinely respond to this. I’m 20 in extended foster care I’m 21 at the end of 2026 so I don’t have a lot of time to get my life together. I never got to save any money since 18, I Just got hired for Door to Door sales and I’m scared because it’s all commission only salary and this was the only job willing to hire. I don’t have a car or a bike so it’s already hard to get to work and keep a job as it is. I can’t get back into school because of a debt that was absolutely not my fault, just recently paid half of it but I can’t pay off the bigger half. I live in Cali in the IE area and the foster system really stops helping once you’re 16. Because of the debt I can’t get into the dorms either so I’m facing homelessness, I stopped qualifying for EBT as well when they put in those new rules (May possibly re-qualify but I’m not depending on it). I have no family or friends to crash with and I’m terrified. I’ve been trying to stay calm and give my worries to God but with everyday starting with bad news I can’t help it. I’m desperate for advice, Please. (I should also mention my goal is to live comfortably in Corona)

Since i generally wake up late so it’s easy for me to get past the daytime especially when i have classes but basic things like just waking up early is very scary since i have nothing to do….. I’m just left with my miserable thoughts and nothing really interests me at all…. All the energy I reserve from socialising just makes me unrest, uncomfortable, confused and eventually exhausted again. Passing merely a day can be so hard for me was never on my wishlist lol….. I’ve few hobbies but that too required for me to break through the social anxiety and I’m noo good at that

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