r/exvegans

i wonder what y’all think about wool sweaters? i remember last year when i got wool sweater that i found in thrift store. winters in eastern europe are rough. it was so warm and i loved it. one of people i used to have contact with went fully vegan around that time. she got mad when she found out that i had this piece and first thing she did was pretentious talk where she yapped about how wool is cruel. she told me that i am normalizing an promoting exploiting and torturing animals when i am wearing this sweater. she said that there are many vegan alternatives. after research i found out that the most common vegan wool alternative is recycled synthetic wool imitation. i doubt if poliester things are any more ethical than second hand wool. and id they last this long and are equallt warm. especially that most of these synthetic sweaters are sold in fast fashion so i dare to say she supports exploiting children and cheap labour.

i personally would rather buy a second hand wool sweater than any „vegan alternative” one made with synthetics. what is your opinion? i am curious!

Hi everyone, was hoping to get some insights from ex-vegans (you guys seem to have more neutral views on the matter having experienced both). My bf recently became vegan and I’m still on an omnivore diet. I don’t have any intentions of becoming vegan, but discussions on raising children have come up as a result of this. Now that he’s vegan he wants to raise any kids we may have vegan. I’m open to this, but am concerned about malnutrition. I’ve seen mixed opinions on the matter. What are your thoughts? Have any of you raised kids vegan? If you did, were they healthy or did you experience nutrition issues?
In a similar vein, have any of you been vegan and dated a non-vegan? How did you make it work?
Any insights would be great, thanks!

I am an ex vegan turned conscious omnivore/still mostly vegan, and my boyfriend is supportive of being selective of eating only ethical, regenerative/sustainable/organic meat when we cook at home, but wants to eat what he likes when he goes out to eat. It triggers the freaking hell out of me to see someone I love eat meat from a factory farm. My man is honestly incredible; he is a really hard worker and he treats me really well. I know I don't get to control what someone else does. I do not want us to split up, but it is really hard to feel like we are not on the same page. I feel like a raging narcissist spoiled brat when I bring it up.

I know it really is not much different than when I use plastic/burn gas, etc.

He tells me it feels like I am in a cultish way of thinking.

Can anyone give advice for how you can get past this? I am trying to stay with my partner, so please no comments telling me to split up. I was raised very religious and the good vs. evil black and white thinking is burned deep into my bones. I isolated myself when I went vegan because I felt like my ability to trust others disappeared. I regret doing that and I feel ashamed for the years I spent feeling superior to others. I don't want to be that way, but it is really hard to be aware of the suffering and love people who live differently. I also have ended or self-sabotaged every romantic relationship, and I know this is partially a manifestation of that.

I'm sorry if this isn't the right sub. I just don't think the vegan sub is the right place for this, because I am looking for words to help get me OUT of the cult-y thinking.

What scares me the most is ending my relationship over what could very well just be propaganda. That feels anti-human dystopian

Edit: please do not spare my feelings. I need outside voices to tell me how crazy this is. I feel like I have been in the vegan mindset for so long that I am out of touch with the world outside of it. I do not want to be this way.

I’m typing this as someone who’s eaten meat all my life, but when I see vegans say this in response to someone else saying they’re not vegan anymore, it drives me insane. When you see someone renounce their Christianity, would you tell them ‘you were never Christian if you don’t believe in it anymore’? No, you wouldn’t, because it makes you sound like a pedantic asshole. ‘But veganism is a belief, not a diet’ someone can hold vegan beliefs and transition later on in their life? That doesn’t mean they didn’t believe in vegan values, just that they don’t align with them later on in their life as they once had. That doesn’t mean that in the period that they were vegan it doesn’t count anymore. In the same vein, you could argue no vegan food exists, because food can’t believe in veganism. Therefore, food can only be plant-based, but nobody fucking says that.

I was a vegetarian from age 12-28. I started eating meat again three years ago but still struggle with thin hair. I did bloodwork last year for another health issue and discovered I had borderline low b12 and Vitamin D. I started taking b12 shots and supplements, my levels are normal now. I initially saw a ton of new hair growth after the first three months but feel like it has since plateaued.

After eating meat again, how long did it take for your hair to look thick and healthy? Especially interested to hear from those who were vegetarian for long periods during puberty.

I’ll start this out with the fact that I do not care what other people eat. Eat all the meat you want.
I was playing with the idea of going full pescatarian since I’m basically that already because I’m not a fan of meats. And I’ve been kicking around the idea of almost going exclusively vegan by cutting out eggs and dairy since I don’t really like eggs and I prefer non dairy alternatives besides cheese which doesn’t love me as much as I love it. I was vegan/vegetarian for three years so this isn’t something I haven’t done before but this is the first time I’ve interacted with other vegans ever.
So I started lurking on r/vegan and r/vegancirclejerk and r/vegancirclejerkchat and boy howdy. I escaped a cult when I was 15 when my mom thankfully died and I wasn’t being forced into it anymore. They act like a cult. The similarities astound me. Not only with how they treat outsiders but how they treat each other. You have to be the exact perfect pure vegan doing xyz perfectly. It’s like when I was in the cult of you had any harmless earthly temptations (teenage mutant ninja turtles, monster energy drink, tofu, soy milk for example) you weren’t a real Christian and you were basically mistreated for it. If you weren’t doing everything exclusively for the glory of god and to convert people (playing a basketball game perfectly and carrying the team to show how wonderful god is to convert people as example) you weren’t a real Christian.
If you didn’t proselytize or circle the conversation into Jesus or god every time you interacted with someone you weren’t a real Christian.
And the persecution complex where other people existing peacefully was a personal attack on you and your god and your faith.
In the cult everyone was unaware of how they were behaving was pushing everyone away. I went to school with Bible verses written in sharpie all over my hands and arms. Everyone was proud of me but all it did was alienate me from everyone which goes into the isolation and us vs them feedback loop.
I’ve seen it several times already where you’re only a real vegan if you only do it exclusively because you feel bad about the animals. Every other reason is not good enough and you aren’t a real vegan if that’s why or part of why you’re vegan.
If you aren’t doing the kind of an activism that harms the movement you’re not a real vegan. If you don’t harass everyone into being vegan you aren’t a real vegan.
I was reading one where this woman couldn’t understand why her boyfriend was getting frustrated with her because she “never tries to convert him” she “only brings up veganism every time he eats” and tries to force him to watch vegan documentaries. Other times people talk about how they’re alienating everyone they know or meet and they’re completely unaware that the way they’re going about it is the problem.
They talk about this persecution I’ve never witnessed and everyone knew I was vegan and I have successfully got people to cut meat out of several meals without proselytizing or patting myself on the back (that wasn’t my goal I was just showing off my meal because I think I’m a badass cook and like sharing). My dad loved the veggie burgers and would eat those if I made them over the burgers he cooked. People love my vegetarian/vegan meals I cook and ask me to make them. I genuinely think it’s them being aggressive about their veganism. I’ve never been harassed like they talk about and I’m starting to think the “harassment” they talk about is people being reactive to the holier than thou attitude and self congratulating they do every time they open their mouths. They do that a lot in the posts/comments and even describe how they’re interacted with people and yeah that’s why people don’t like you, bestie. Thats why no one is receptive of veganism.
I think they are the way they are to reinforce the feedback loop of proselytizing, being rejected, us vs them, frustration, isolation, and proselytizing again. It’s very cult coded. I also think the Pure Vegan (tm) vs the Fake Vegan is also part of that feedback loop like how it was in the cult with the True Christians vs the Fake Christians.
I don’t know it’s just my observation.

I started watching Freelee on Facebook and began doing the fruit diet and Raw Till 4 for about a month before signing up. I then signed up and followed her protocol for about two months. During the day, I had it down perfectly with no mess-ups. I was eating half of a large watermelon for breakfast, and for lunch, a smoothie with 6–7 bananas and passion fruit, strawberries, or mango. I didn’t stray from the plan or snack in between.

At night, however, following the raw diet was a struggle, so I would eat cooked, healthy meals. I basically cut meat out almost completely. I had previously eaten meat every day, and I reduced it to almost nonexistent. I was not perfect with the vegan aspect, for sure, but I was still eating healthy, nutritious dinners.

After two months of following her fruit diet very strictly, my potassium levels were extremely high. I have seen a naturopath for over 12 years and have consistently had blood work done, and I have never had an issue with my kidneys. After following this diet, however, my kidneys began showing signs of stress, and I was told they were struggling to process the EXCESSIVE amount of potassium she recommended with her banana diet.

My knees also swoll up, and I could barely walk for two months. I am still struggling to correct these issues after following Freelee’s program and have had to pay a significant amount out of pocket trying to get everything resolved.

When I first emailed Freelee, I wanted to know if I could cancel my program. I was told no, so I then asked if she could offer any insight into what might be going wrong. Instead of offering help, I was scolded by her, similar to how I have seen her respond to many other people in her private group and online for not following the diet perfectly.

What I ate at night did NOT cause this. I followed the fruit portion of the diet very closely, and the excessive amount of bananas and fruit was the 100% the issue!

My experience with Freelee was extremely disappointing. I found her to be arrogant, condescending, and rude, and when I had a serious issue, she offered zero help. She also would not refund my money, even though I followed the program for two months and ultimately had to stop, and won't be doing it ever again.

If you are looking for an fruitarian who is authentic and supportive to follow, I would recommend looking into Ted Carr. He is extremely professional, kind, and costs around $30 a month to follow and get help and answers. When I emailed him about my situation, before I knew I had high potassium he was not sure but messaged with several times and suggested people who could potentially help me. I received nothing like that from Freelee. If anything goes wrong she will only play the blame game and blame you!

Based on my experience, I would strongly caution others about following this diet, it can cause some people serious health issues. If your potassium levels reach the level mine did not only are your kidneys being compromised but your heart is highly susceptible to heart issues at this point. Beware and be very careful following her protocol and if anything goes askew with your health just know you will receive ZERO help and you will be met with the most combative accusations ever!