
Sent my first Mun mission. It went great until it didn't. 6 Kerbals currently stranded.
- Step 1: The scanning probe disaster
Built a nice little scanning probe to find ore deposits. Forgot to put it in polar orbit. Ran out of delta-v trying to change inclination after the fact. Mission failed. Probe dead. Learned what polar orbit means the hard way.
- Step 2: Built the most overengineered mining lander in Kerbal history
96 tonnes. Fission reactor on top with massive radiator wings. 4 Wolfhound engines. 2 drills. Convert-O-Tron. The works. Spent approximately 3 hours arguing with an AI about which engines to use before settling on Wolfhounds after browsing through approximately 47 terrible booster engines.
- Step 3: Actually landed on Mun
Worked perfectly. ISRU filled the tanks beautifully. Bill, Bob and Valentine Kerman and 3 other Kerbin that are not a part of the main cast performed the first-in-history landing on Mun, opening a new chapter for Kerbalkind. We were very proud.
Shitfuck 3 landed on the Midlands of Mun. Drills running.
- Step 4: All 4 engines simultaneously exploded on ignition
Full fuel tanks. Kerbals strapped in. Return mission ready. This is it. The culmination of everything. Engines on. Full throttle.
The Wolfhounds blew up within a blink of an eye.
All 4 of them. Simultaneously. Gone.
Nothing survived except the command pod, which now sits on the Mun surface as a monument to human hubris.
- Step 5: The Rescue Mission (ongoing)
Currently building a rescue lander. Same design but this time we're fixing whatever murdered the engines. Leading theory is the Wolfhounds clipped into the surface and detonated on ignition. Alternative theory is Kerbal physics just said no.
The rescue lander will have taller legs, better engine clearance, and the hard-won wisdom of a man who has already killed 4 engines on the Mun.
- Worst case scenario for Step 5:
The rescue lander lands perfectly. ISRU fills the tanks. We load all 6 stranded Kerbals aboard. Engines explode on ignition again. We now have 6 original stranded Kerbals plus however many Kerbals were on the rescue mission also stranded on the Mun.
We will then build a rescue mission for the rescue mission.
At some point the entire Kerbal Space Program will be living on the Mun and there will be nobody left at KSC to build another rocket.
Jeb thinks this is fine.
!!!!UPDATE!!!!:
- Step 6: The Rescue Mission's Rescue Mission
The Shitcuck 1 Munar Rescue Lander touched down beautifully. Jebediah Kerman at the helm. The 6 stranded Kerbals from the wreck of Shitfuck 3 marched across the Mun surface to their salvation.
Shitcuck 1 Munar Rescue Lander landing site.
Drills deployed. Reactor on. Convert-O-Tron set to produce fuel. Everything was going perfectly.
Jeb noticed the fuel gauges weren't moving.
He asked Bill to go outside and check. Bill exited the hatch, walked around the entire ship, came back inside, and asked Jeb one question.
"Where's the ore tank?"
Jeb had no answer.
The Shitcuck I Munar Rescue Lander, sent specifically to rescue the crew of Shitfuck 3, had no ore tank. The drills were drilling ore directly into the void. The Convert-O-Tron was converting nothing. The fuel gauges were going to stay exactly where they were.
All personnel are now stranded on the Mun. The rescue mission required a rescue mission. We predicted this.
The Rescue Mission Rescue Mission is now underway.
Jebediah still thinks this is fine.
(This isn't staged, I actually forgot the fucking ore tanks.)
!!!! FINAL UPDATE !!!!
- Step 7: Shitcuck 2 lands on the Mun. With an ore tank this time.
Shitcuck 2's transfer to the Mun.
Shitcuck 2 Munar Rescue Rescue Lander touched down beautifully. Ore tank present and accounted for. Drills deployed. Reactor on. Convert-O-Tron running. Fuel gauges moving.
Shitfuck 3, Shitcuck 1 and Shitcuck 3.
The 6 stranded Kerbals marched across the Mun surface for the second time, past the command pod monument, past the corpse of Shitcuck 1, and climbed aboard. All 8 Kerbals strapped in. Tanks full. Engines on.
Nothing exploded.
- Step 8: Home.
Shitcuck 2 burned for Kerbin, aerobraked through the atmosphere as a fireball in the night sky, deployed chutes over the clouds, and set down in a field somewhere in the middle of nowhere as the sun rose over the mountains.
All 8 Kerbals alive. Nobody stranded. No missing parts. No exploding engines.
The mission that started as a simple scanning probe ended as a three-act tragedy requiring two rescue missions and a permanent graveyard of spacecraft on the Mun surface. Back there right now, undisturbed forever, sits the command pod monument to human hubris and Shitcuck 1 with its empty ore tank.
We're already planning the next mission.
Jebediah thinks that went great actually.