r/ufyh

My bathroom cabinet has annoyed me for probably two years.

Every time I opened it, something fell over. Half-empty bottles behind other half-empty bottles, hotel shampoos, skincare I tried twice and hated, three nearly identical hair products, random samples I kept because "maybe someday."

Today I pulled everything out and made one rule: if I actively avoid using it, it doesn't get to live here anymore.

That was apparently the permission I needed.

I threw out the dried-up stuff, emptied products that were basically finished, put unopened things I won't use into a donation box, wiped the shelves and only put back what I actually reach for.

Took 32 minutes.

The cabinet isn't Pinterest pretty. I didn't buy organizers or matching containers. There's just... space now. I can see everything without moving six bottles first.

I've opened it four times since cleaning it for absolutely no reason.

Tiny unfucking, huge satisfaction.

Hi all ♡

I recently started dating someone that I love to pieces. We are getting to do many fun things together, but also more than with anyone else in my life, I want to be there for the hard times, too. He very recently lost someone, and I'm getting to see the strokes of color come back into his life.

His house really needs some love. I know depression and grief kicks people in the ass. I want to help without being pushy. I don't judge at all, but want him to have a place to land that is cozy and safe.

Tips on how to offer without causing any offense? So far, I have been making us both bentos for work! And when I stayed over the other night, as thanks for his housemate making dinner, I did a little extra dishes. We are also planning a date to plant a low maintenance garden, with flowers in his mom's favorite colors, and work on the outside.

I know grief is not something that resolves overnight. Everything is just going to be day by day. Looking for more ideas like packed lunches or the garden that could be something happy :)

she helps a friend clean an entire trailer, the whole place disorganized and messy.

we can all relate to that!
they really did an awesome job in a short amount of time.

definitely helps w motivation!

Dishwashing has always been a complex issue for me. My mom never washed or rinsed dirty dishes before putting them in the dishwasher and I grew up eating off dishes and flatware that had dried food stuck to them. As an adult, I wash my dishes completely before putting them in the dishwasher and have noticed mineral buildup on friends’ dishes and glasses because they don’t scrub out the glasses or use a scrub pad on their plates & flatware.

My daughter and I are currently living in a rental using the late owner’s dishes and flatware (we bought our own coffee cups and water/juice cups). Before I joined them in October, they’d been eating off paper plates and using plastic flatware. This drove me crazy — it feels like camping out — so I started using what our landlady owned and also put the dishwasher back into service after at least a year of not being used.

I’ve struggled with cleaning all my life and let the dishes get really out of control — both sides of the huge old ceramic sink full of dirty dishes, gnats landing on everything in the kitchen, and me putting off washing a load every single day because some of the dishes had visible mold on them and I didn’t want to deal with that, as I have a skin mold allergy. I finally washed one side of the sink Wednesday night and was astonished to find mold had stained the ceramic sink. I tried scrubbing it with Comet, but no improvement. I cleaned it as best I could, then filled it with soapy water and loaded the other side of the sink into the empty but stained side.

After noticing tonight that the water had drained out and the gnats were flocking even more to the filthy dishes, I got out of bed (I’d settled in for the night), emptied the dishwater, filled the empty side of the sink with soapy water, and started scrubbing. There was a lot of food debris on the side that had drained, so it wasn’t until I’d finished the dishes that could be washed and set the really filthy ones to soak, then rinsed out the newly empty side, that I was astonished to find the mold stains had disappeared! Apparently the new soapy soak had cleaned away the stains! I was really worried about those stains, because the landlady’s son is reluctantly renting to us strictly as a favor for keeping his mother and our longtime friend and neighbor out of a nursing home. He’s already had a talk with my daughter about how much stuff she’s acquired since his mom died when he was under the impression she’d be clearing out. (She’s a terrible hoarder just like both my parents were.)

I’m now running a partial load in the dishwasher and will finish up tomorrow to have a kitchen full of clean dishes, flatware, and lunchware my daughter uses for weekly lunch prep. I’ll be able to wash the dishes as I eat each meal or snack and run the dishwasher when full instead of letting the dishes build up in the sink for my daughter to chide and stress me about. The gnats will diminish immensely and I’ve already put out several dishes of apple cider vinegar & Dawn to control them until the weather cools in late October and early November. I also opened the screened window an inch or so to get some of the flies out of the kitchen into the opening between the window & the screen.

I feel so much better! I was too embarrassed to take pictures, but wanted to let everybody know about the progress you’ve inspired me to make.

Today's plan was to get trough as much important data as possible, making some progress in the garden, and getting the floor decluttered.

What I managed to do at all, was an antivirus-scan of the PC, a few bananas on this platform, 15 mins of gardening, sorting the stuff on the floor in two piles of clothes and literally trash, and when the afternoon came stupidly taking a look in an old shoe box, I almost forgot.

For context, I have an autoimmune disease that gives me quite an fatigue, problems to concentrate, a good amount of headaches etc., especially when the weather is hot and the air high in humidity, so I was fighting even harder than usual trough the day, sitting around in braindead/zombie mode and somehow made the stupid decision to use the little bit of energy to sort the lose change in that box.

Anyway I'm going to buy a dehumidifier with that money to make the future hopefully less of a "brain function almost zero by weather" situation.🤣🤪

My apartment has been slowly getting away from me for a while. Nothing dramatic happened, I just kept putting things down instead of putting them away until every room had its own little pile.

Yesterday I decided I was NOT cleaning the apartment. I picked the kitchen table and told myself that was the entire job.

Trash went in the bin, dishes went to the sink, random stuff got returned to roughly where it belonged. I even wiped the table down.

It took maybe 18 minutes.

The weird part was that once I had one completely clear surface, the rest of the room stopped feeling impossible. I ended up doing the counter too, but I stopped there before turning it into a four-hour punishment session.

This morning I walked in and saw an actual empty table instead of a storage area.

Apparently “clean one thing” works much better on my brain than “clean the house.”

The issue I keep bumping up against is I have a lot of large pieces of necessary medical equipment and medical supplies that take up a ton of square footage in our house. To the point that our kitchen looks like a hospital post-earthquake. I cant get rid of it and cant put it in the basement (think oxygens tanks and tube feed supplies as examples) but our house is only 900sqft!

I guess this is more of a vent than anything, its very frustrating to live in chaos, especially with our kid having to navigate it as well.

I do clean here and there, but not often enough to get my place looking nice. I want to get the big cleaning done so I’m just doing maintenance cleaning. My to do list is long and I get overwhelmed when trying to decide where to start. I know “just pick something”, but I also like being strategic, so I want to hear how other people work through things.

Do you pick one room and do nearly everything there? Do the same thing but in all of the rooms? Start with specific tasks? Do your “maintenance tasks” (dishes, laundry, taking out trash) first and then the bigger things? Move clutter out of sight and organize later? Do you rotate which room/task you focus on? Just pick whichever thing you think of first? Do the easiest thing or the hardest thing first?

I’m curious! I also have ADHD, depression, and anxiety, and while they’re mostly managed this is an area of my life where I see some symptoms of each come up.

Oh my goodness. I had no idea I wasn't soooo alone! My entire house (the humble abode) truly needs unfucked. Like everywhere. It's been mental block for a long time.

I left my marriage 2-1/2 years ago ( not for this sub ), got the humble abode for me and the critters, and I've just let it get out of control. Then I broke my ankle in May, had surgery 10 days later, and it's only gotten worse due to immobility. Now that I'm able to move about a little more, with a walker, I know it's time. But it's also daunting. I get very sore and tired from being out of shape from being zero weight bearing for two months.

I am grateful to have stumbled upon this sub at this exact point in time, and I'm hopeful now, realizing I'm not the only one facing these issues. It's a lonely state to be in, so hopefully the stories, before/after pics, and support I read here will help me along to the place I want to be.

Thanks for reading, and wish me luck!

This weekend was a wash, but I can at least do some work in the kitchen and try to do the floors. What are you up to?