u/Alarming-Summer-5606

I’m genuinely open to being proven wrong, but I currently believe that a long history of relationships, especially many short-term relationships, is a legitimate red flag when choosing a long term partner.

I’m not saying someone with a high “body count” is automatically a bad person or incapable of love. I’m talking specifically about relationship patterns.
At some point, I think repeated relationship failure has to tell us something.

If someone has been through 4, 8, 10+ relationships and almost every one eventually ended, why should we assume this time will be different? At what point does “I just haven’t met the right person” become a pattern of choosing poorly, losing interest, avoiding commitment, or being unable to tolerate the normal difficulties that come with long term relationships?

Long term relationships aren't sustained by chemistry alone. They require patience, compromise, forgiveness, emotional regulation, and the willingness to stay when the relationship stops being exciting.
My concern is that someone who has spent years repeatedly replacing partners may become conditioned to think:
“If this relationship gets difficult, I'll just find someone else.”
And once someone develops that mindset, how do you build something that lasts?
There’s also the emotional side. After enough breakups, disappointments, casual relationships, and starting over, I wonder whether some people become emotionally numb. They may still want companionship, but have less ability or willingness to deeply trust, attach, sacrifice, and be vulnerable.

Of course, there are exceptions. Someone can have several relationships while young, learn from them, mature, and eventually become an amazing spouse. And someone with only one relationship can still be an awful partner.
But I'm not convinced that exceptions invalidate the broader pattern.
If relationship history tells us anything about someone's future behavior, shouldn't repeated inability to maintain relationships be considered relevant evidence?

So change my view:
What is the strongest argument that someone with a long history of failed relationships is just as likely to become a stable, loyal, successful long term partner as someone who has demonstrated that they can maintain a healthy relationship for many years?
And please don't just say, “People change.” What specifically changes, and why should I expect it to?

For women thinking about marriage, what matters more: a man’s looks, height, personality, or financial stability?
Would you marry a guy who is average looking and the same height as you or a little shorter, but has a great personality, is loyal, emotionally mature, and financially stable?

Which of these matters most to you when choosing a husband?

لو في راجل مناسب جدا من كل النواحي، محترم وحنين وشخصيته حلوة، بس بيحط شعر مستعار أو باروكة عشان عنده صلع أو شعره خفيف… ممكن تتجوزيه عادي ولا الموضوع ده هيكون بالنسبة لك turn off؟
بجد بسأل من غير تنمر 😅 عايز أعرف البنات بتشوف الموضوع ده إزاي، علما ان البروكة شكلها طبيعي و مش باينه انها باروكة؟

They’ve turned people into profiles, options, and numbers. Swipe left, swipe right, match, ghost, move on. And because there’s always another person a swipe away, it feels like nobody is willing to put in the effort anymore.

I think it’s created this mentality that everyone is replaceable.

Someone has a flaw? Move on. A date isn’t perfect? There’s someone else. Instead of getting to know someone and accepting that real people are imperfect, we’re constantly looking for a “better option.”

But people aren’t products. Relationships take patience, effort, and getting through the parts that aren’t perfect.

Maybe dating apps didn’t give us too few options. Maybe they gave us too many, and made us forget the value of choosing one person.

Salam everyone,

I was born and raised in the West, and most of my family lives here. I'm looking for a wife who shares my Islamic values and prefers a more traditional approach to marriage and family life. Because of that, I started looking on marriage apps and focused my search on places where Islam is widely practiced and people tend to have more traditional lifestyles.

I matched with a sister, and we've been talking for a little while. We exchanged pictures, and I think she's very beautiful. She also seems like a genuinely kind, shy, and soft-spoken person. She told me her mother encouraged her to create the account because she's looking to get married.

Interestingly, over text she actually seems fun, active, and engaged. She'll joke around and the conversation flows much better. But when we spoke on the phone to get to know each other before I decide whether to introduce myself to her father, it was completely different.

She hardly asked me any questions. Most of the time she just agreed with what I said or gave very short answers. She was extremely quiet. Part of me thinks she's just shy or nervous, especially since this might be a new experience for her. Another part of me worries that this is simply her personality.

The thing is, she seems like someone who would probably make a wonderful wife. She appears respectful, kind hearted, and sincere. At the same time, I didn't really feel a natural connection during our call. I found myself carrying the conversation, and I honestly got a bit bored. I also don't want to lead her on because she seems very sweet and sensitive, and I'd hate to hurt her feelings.

I'm wondering if I should give it more time because she's just shy and may open up later, or if the lack of connection this early is something I shouldn't ignore.

For those of you who are married or have gone through the marriage process, did attraction to someone's personality grow over time? Or is this a sign that we're probably not compatible?

One more thing: she lives on the opposite side of the world. Meeting her in person would require an expensive trip, so I only want to travel if there's a good chance she's the right person. I'm not sure if it's worth taking that step based on how things have gone so far

Please give me honest advice. I'd really appreciate hearing from people with experience. Jazakum Allahu khayran.

Salam everyone,

I was born and raised in the West, and most of my family lives here. I'm looking for a wife who shares my Islamic values and prefers a more traditional approach to marriage and family life. Because of that, I started looking on marriage apps and focused my search on places where Islam is widely practiced and people tend to have more traditional lifestyles.

I matched with a sister, and we've been talking for a little while. We exchanged pictures, and I think she's very beautiful. She also seems like a genuinely kind, shy, and soft-spoken person. She told me her mother encouraged her to create the account because she's looking to get married.

Interestingly, over text she actually seems fun, active, and engaged. She'll joke around and the conversation flows much better. But when we spoke on the phone to get to know each other before I decide whether to introduce myself to her father, it was completely different.

She hardly asked me any questions. Most of the time she just agreed with what I said or gave very short answers. She was extremely quiet. Part of me thinks she's just shy or nervous, especially since this might be a new experience for her. Another part of me worries that this is simply her personality.

The thing is, she seems like someone who would probably make a wonderful wife. She appears respectful, kind hearted, and sincere. At the same time, I didn't really feel a natural connection during our call. I found myself carrying the conversation, and I honestly got a bit bored. I also don't want to lead her on because she seems very sweet and sensitive, and I'd hate to hurt her feelings.

I'm wondering if I should give it more time because she's just shy and may open up later, or if the lack of connection this early is something I shouldn't ignore.

For those of you who are married or have gone through the marriage process, did attraction to someone's personality grow over time? Or is this a sign that we're probably not compatible?

One more thing: she lives on the opposite side of the world. Meeting her in person would require an expensive trip, so I only want to travel if there's a good chance she's the right person. I'm not sure if it's worth taking that step based on how things have gone so far

Please give me honest advice. I'd really appreciate hearing from people with experience. Jazakum Allahu khayran.

A few months ago, I deleted my Muzz account because I was taking a break. I'm a private person and wasn't comfortable with the idea that my photos and information might still be visible after deleting my account. I started worrying that my profile hadn't actually been removed, so I created a temporary female account using AI-generated images (not a real person) just to check whether my deleted profile was still appearing.. I set the filters to my details, confirmed my profile wasn't showing, and deleted the temporary account within the same hour. I never messaged or interacted with anyone.

Three months later, I tried logging back into Muzz and found out I'd been permanently banned.
I appealed the ban and explained everything honestly, but Muzz rejected my appeal.
I've always been respectful to everyone I spoke to on the app, which makes this even more upsetting. I live in a Western country with a very small Muslim community, so Muzz was one of the only realistic ways for me to meet someone for marriage.

Is there any legitimate way to get back on the platform, or to bypass the ban? Does purchasing a new phone and creating a new account with new phone number and email work?

أنا شب فلسطيني سوري، معي وثيقة سفر سورية، لكن تربيت وعايش بالأردن طول عمري. عندي شغلي الخاص والحمد لله وضعي المادي ممتاز ومستقر.
هالفترة أهلي بلشوا يدورولي على بنت الحلال، واللي صدمني إنه أكثر من مرة، أول ما أهل البنت يعرفوا إني مش فلسطيني أردني وبحمل وثيقة سفر، بيعتذروا مباشرة وبيحكوا: "ما في نصيب". بدون ما يسألوا عن شخصيتي أو شغلي أو أي إشي ثاني.
بصراحة أنا كنت متوقع إنه أهم إشي الأخلاق، والاستقرار، وإنه الواحد يكون قادر يفتح بيت ويعيش حياة كريمة. ما كنت متخيل إنه موضوع الوثيقة أو الجنسية ممكن يكون عامل حاسم لهاي الدرجة.
هل هاد الإشي فعلاً منتشر؟ ولا بس أنا صادفت هيك حالات؟ وإذا في حدا مر بنفس التجربة، كيف تعامل معها؟
حابب أسمع آراءكم وتجاربكم.

يا جماعة عايز أعرف رأيكم بصراحة.
واحد صاحبي زي اخويا قالي إن خطيبته نفسها و مُصرّه تشغل أغنية "مسيطرة" في الفرح، وسألني عن رأيي. أنا شخصيًا قلتله إني مش شايفها اختيار مناسب خالص، وبالنسبة لي مستحيل ولا يمكن أقبل بحاجة زي دي لو كان فرحي، مهما كانت الأغنية مشهورة أو الناس بتحبها، و حاجة زي دي ممكن تخليني افكر بالشخص الي قدامي اذا مناسب بجد ولا لا.

بس في نفس الوقت عارف إن الأذواق بتختلف من شخص للتاني، فحبيت أعرف رأي أغلب الناس هنا.
لو حضرتوا فرح والعروسة شغلت "مسيطرة"، هتشوفوا الموضوع عادي ومجرد أغنية للجو والرقص؟ ولا هتحسوا إن كلماتها ورسالتها مش مناسبة لمناسبة زي الجواز؟
وليه؟
ياريت النقاش يكون باحترام، لأني فعلًا مهتم أعرف رأي الناس وهل أنا متشدد في الموضوع ولا في ناس كتير شايفاه بنفس الطريقة.

I'm already on finasteride and minoxidil but I'm still losing hair and my density keeps decreasing. I still have hair coverage, just low density throughout.
I'm considering a transplant but I'm worried about shock loss and damaging my native hair, which seems to be a bigger risk for diffuse thinners.
Which clinics/surgeons in the UAE would you recommend, and did anyone experience permanent loss of native hair after the transplant?
Would appreciate any experiences or advice.

I’ve noticed something in Dubai that I genuinely don’t understand. A lot of men here spend insane amounts of money on women they barely even know.

I recently saw a video of a girl talking about fines she got in Dubai. A while later she posted another video saying some random guy paid all her fines for her… and she doesn’t even know him personally!

I went on a date with a girl who had a brand new iPhone 17. She casually told me, “Yeah, some guy bought it for me.” 😂

Another girl literally told me she’s living in an apartment that a guy bought for her. I’m not even exaggerating at this point. 😂

And honestly, I feel like this kind of behavior inflates a lot of women’s egos here because they get used to men constantly throwing money, gifts, phones, apartments, trips. Then naturally their expectations become higher and higher.

Maybe I’m old fashioned, but I don’t believe in spending my hard earned money on women I’m just getting to know. A simple coffee date is enough for me to see if we’re compatible. I care more about personality, loyalty, character, and how someone treats people.
If a girl proves she’s genuine and worth investing in emotionally, I’d gladly give her my eyes. But acting like an ATM for strangers? I genuinely don’t understand it.

And before someone says “you’re just broke” or “poor,” relax 😂 I have my own business here in Dubai. This isn’t about not having money, it’s about values and self respect.

Am I wrong for thinking this way, or has this become normal now? Curious what other people think.

اليوم و انا بالمول كنت قاعد بمطعم مع صحابي. شفت وحدة كتير عجبتني و لفتت نظري باكثر من شيء. المهم اني كنت بدي اقوم احكي معها بس ما قدرت. من الآخر خفت تحطني بموقف محرج. سؤالي هو هل البنات بتتقبل لو اجاها شخص ما بتعرفه و طلب رقم ابوها او امها عشان يتعرف عليها بطريقة شرعية بهدف الزواج؟ اذا اه شو هي احسن طريقك الواحد يفتح الموضوع؟ حابب اعرف شو راي البنات بهالموضوع و اذا متقبلينه.

Me and my wife got into a huge fight recently.

Basically, she secretly agreed to guarantee a pretty big bank loan for her brother and never told me about it. I only found out because her brother stopped paying and the bank filed a case against her. That’s when she finally came and told me everything.

Then she asked me to help and pay the money.

I refused.

Maybe this sounds cold, but I was honestly shocked. We’re married and she made a huge financial decision behind my back that could’ve affected both of us. I feel like if her and her brother made this mess without even talking to me first, why am I suddenly expected to fix it?

She got really upset, left the house, and went to her parents.

In the end, her dad paid the money himself. But now my wife refuses to come back, and her dad keeps saying I “left her during her hardest moment” and that he can’t trust me with his daughter anymore because I didn’t stand by her.

I told him respectfully that his daughter and son created this problem together, not me. But somehow I’m the bad guy now because I didn’t wanna pay a huge amount for something I wasn’t even told about.

Now I’m wondering if maybe I should’ve handled it differently or tried harder instead of standing my ground.

أنا شاب عمري 28 سنة، ومن وقت ما تخرجت وأنا بدوّر على بنت الحلال، لكن لحد الآن ما لقيت الشخص اللي أحس إنه مناسب لي.

خليني أكون صريح: عندي مشكلة أنا واعي لها، وهي إني ما بنجذب للبنات القصيرين. طولي 182 سم، ودائمًا بنجذب للبنت اللي تكون قريبة من طولي. الموضوع بالنسبة لي مش تفصيلة صغيرة، بالعكس هو من أول المعايير اللي بلاقي نفسي بركّز عليها. ممكن بنت تكون جميلة جدًا لكنها قصيرة، وبنت ثانية جمالها عادي بس طويلة، فألاقي نفسي ميّال للطويلة بشكل واضح.

المشكلة إنه نادر جدًا تلاقي بنت عربية طولها فوق 175. اتعرفت فعلًا على كم بنت بالطول اللي يعجبني، لكن ما كمل الموضوع بسبب اختلاف التفكير أو القيم.

واللي معقّد الموضوع أكثر إني حاليًا متعرف على بنت فيها تقريبًا كل شيء كنت أتمناه: جميلة، لطيفة، متفاهمين جدًا، ومتوافقين في أغلب الأشياء المهمة… لكن قصيرة. والمشكلة الأكبر إني مش حاسس بانجذاب جنسي لها.

الحين أنا في حيرة: هل المفروض أحاول أتغاضى عن موضوع الطول وأدي فرصة للبنات الأقصر؟ خاصة إني حاسس إن الانجذاب عندي شبه معدوم لو الطول أقل من 175.

سؤالي بصراحة:

هل أكمل وأحاول أتجاوز موضوع الانجذاب؟ ولا هذا مؤشر واضح إنه العلاقة مش راح تنجح على المدى الطويل؟

حابب أسمع آراءكم، خصوصًا لو حد مرّ بتجربة مشابهة.