u/Asleep_Excitement_59

I know it sounds exaggerated. I know it sounds crazy. If I never had experienced it myself and it were anyone else writing this post claiming this about someone they never knew, I would think the same.

But it doesn't make it any of the less true. It was real for me. Too real. Somehow Liam's story broke the blood/brain barrier in me. And despite how hard I tried to control it, keep it at bay, I quickly knew it was completely uncontrollable for me. I couldn't separate myself from it like I could with other victims I fought for in the past. It became imprinted on my very DNA. Out of all the horror stories of the victims I fought for, even worse than Liam's, I have no idea why his affected me this deeply. I wish I knew. I wish I could tell you. I just don't know.

Everyone knows my story and how I came to learn about Liam. It was as simple as me reading a news story the day that Liam Payne died and just happened to see a comment, and that comment led me down a rabbit hole. A rabbit hole full of torture.

I won't lie. I wish I never clicked on any articles regarding Liam. This is by far one of the most painful experiences on someone eles behalf that I have ever experienced.

The day after Liam died, the next four weeks, I spent day and night just reading all the extreme hate from all over the web that he endured that was written and cemented in internet history for the last 15 years of his life. (Long before his ex ever entered the picture so they can't even dare attempt to claim that was the reason why.) From the time he entered X factor, until the day he died. I'm no stranger to life or the internet. I know many celebrities experience hate and some more worse than others. But what happened to Liam, this was on a scale that I had never seen before. It was truly horrific.

During this time, I literally felt the chemicals in my brain starting to change. I didn't know what was happening to me, but deep down I knew what it was, it was traumatizing me. I've seen the worst human kind had to offer. I've personally experienced the worst of what humans had to offer. But I never seen anything quite like this. I'm not saying what happened to Liam is the worst thing that has ever happened to someone, because lord knows that wouldn't be true. But I can safely say that I never seen this completely unjustified measurable and unending type of inhumane cruelty that took form in psychological violence slung at just one person before, that's for sure. The way Liam's very core, his very soul, was repeatedly ravaged, by so many, for over 15 years was absolutely heinous and brutal. It simultaneously highly disturbed me that his peers in the industry, his friends, many others who saw what was happening, didn't and wouldn't step in to provide real sincere efforts to try to mitigate what was happening to Liam. If anything, they just did things to make it worse. My mind simply couldn't fathom what I was seeing. Still can't. And never will.

By week five after Liam died, things came to a head. I decided to actually go on Twitter. To see the online home for One Direction with my own eyes. To see where the hate against Liam was born, lived, thrived and flourished the most. I had never been on Twitter in my entire life up until that point. I had made an account on a whim a couple of months before he died, but barely used it.

Now I was going to sign on to actually see it all with my own eyes what Liam experienced first hand. Before this, I was just reading screenshots and things written about him on other websites which I've already explained were horrific enough. But I had to see ground zero.

If the vicarious PTSD wasn't official before I went to look, it certainly was solidified after that. There are no words to accurately explain the utter torment I experienced reading everything on Twitter. And then to see the ones who inflicted harm onto him, either gloating or trying to arrogantly justify what they did or pretending to mourn him and use him for clout when they were the ones who sent him the hate. Just looking like demons dancing on Liam's grave. Celebrating that they were able to end him. Not hint of remorse anywhere. When it came to see how low humanity had sunk to, how evil they had become, it was truly apocalyptic.

I will just explain it like this. Six years ago, I was inflicted with a very serious medical health issue that produces severe physical pain everyday and has left me bed ridden. Since early 2020, I was suffering and slowly dying, but I wasn't able to cry. Because if I cried, it made my physical pain so much worse. For whatever reason, those with my condition, when we cry, it sends our body into orbit with pain. So not only do we suffer, but we can't even shed a tear. I can't explain how awful that is. Not being able to cry when you're in so much pain. To have to hold it back. My husband, my kids, everyone that knows me knows this. Knows that I can't cry. Knows that I have to fight to hold myself back from crying because the sheer amount of physical pain I know I will suffer afterwards is terrifying.

So, since I can't explain into words how it affected me and now that you've read the last part, let's just say after I read what went down on Twitter that happened to Liam, I laid in my husbands arms and sobbed for hours. HOURS. I hadn't cried in over four years when I needed to so badly. After five weeks of just merely glancing over 15 years of the worst inhumane psychological cruelty inflicted onto a single human being, I was deep, almost wailing sobs from the depths of my soul. I couldn't control it.

Now, does that give you any idea about how bad it was?

What's even worse, as time went on, every week since then all the way up until now, I would find new ways of the way Liam was tortured. I just kept asking out loud, "how???"

It all left me with profound sadness, grief, and most of all rage.

And if it couldn't get anymore exponentially worse for me, is the thought of the fact that one day, Bear is going to see it all. And it seems that no one gives a fucking damn about that but me. My heart breaks for that little boy so much. I can't imagine the pain his little sweet heart has already endured losing his father. I simply can't bear the thought that he doesn't even know what's really out there and one day he's gonna see everything I saw. I wish there was some way for me to adsorb that for him. I really, really would if I could. The only thing I can do is beg God to give me the brunt of the pain to spare Bear as much as possible from it. I also extremely worry that these monsters will do to him what they did to his father. These bastards already hinted as to it. The lengths that these monsters went to and continue to go to, to hurt Liam and his family, they are just so unhinged and dangerous. This is NOT going to bet better until there is REAL accountability for what happened to Liam. You all hoping it will just go away and "ignoring it" doesn't work. It just gets worse and worse. We already seen that. We are seeing it in real time. Why don't you all use your fucking voices and demand accountability??? Just as complicit, you all are!

Anyway, that's it. That's all. I gotta stop here. You all are useless. I did all I could do and then some. My conscience allows me to sleep at night. You all will never be able to say the same.

You are being heavily attacked and they are going for the jugular for one reason and one reason only. They are jealous of you. You, and Soulidified in general, are a threat to them or whoever they support. The ones who are attacking you are bottom feeders who roam and slither along the lowest vibrational parts of the earth, with the rest of the jealous wicked.

Let's state the obvious first. Before I do, there is NOTHING wrong with being plus sized if you were. Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. However, the fact of the matter is, that you are not fat. You're just not and for anyone to claim it is a lie. You aren't even a little bit overweight. Not even a smidge. I never once thought you were fat, chubby or the least bit over weight. It's an absolute asinine ridiculous claim only meant to break you. Your body is very fit, in shape and you are very sexy. Believe me when I tell you that you break straight women's hearts because we know we can never have your fine self.

These earth demons mocking you are just saying this to break you down. You are actively being sabotaged. They don't want Soulidified to succeed. This is why this is happening to you and you're their target right now.

Malik, I want you to close your eyes and channel Liam. As you are very well aware, no one understands better what you are going through right now then our Liam who is watching over us. Whenever I am getting attacked, such as massively downvoted being one of the many ways, which they will downvote this post just because they hate me (so don't take it personally when they downvote this post because it's about me, not you) I quietly meditate and I channel Liam and his strength. I am quickly reminded of the protective bubble that always surrounds me and I instantly feel so safe. It's an amazing feeling that I can't even describe. It's such a gift. Now I'm borrowing from mine to form a protective bubble around you also, to protect you from this spiritual warfare.

Look at me. They can't touch us. All their weapons they used to attack you with completely break and fall apart when they hit the walls of our bubble. You see it? Look. Look at them break and fall. You with me? There is nothing they can do to harm you. You are meant for great success. Now lets have a good laugh watching their weapons break and fall apart, toast and drink our sparkling water shall we?

Love you Malik.

Edit to add*** they are going after Bradley too. I'm sure Landon as well but i haven't seen it on him just yet. So it's the whole group.

And don't even say ignore them because I tried not giving them attention myself, but now it's gotten way out of control. I can only imagine how hurt the boys are by it. The amount of tweets going viral and racking up likes and retweets is insane. That's why I say its impossible this hate wave is inorganic.

It's coordinated by who and why, are the questions. Or maybe the attacks aren't coordinated at all and this is just how disgusting people act.

But this is where it gets even more insidious. They really went for the jugular because the hate that they are attacking Soulidified with is calling Malik and possibly Shade too, "short and fat". Hundreds of tweets saying this with thousands of likes and retweets like I said.

On what planet are Malik and Shade "fat" or even close to it? WTF?

I can only imagine how f***ing hurtful this is to Malik and Shade. I want Malik and Shade to know they are NOT fat. Not even a little bit. Your physics are amazing and on point. Completely beautiful and sexy gorgeous men. Please do NOT pay attention to what is being said, especially by these accounts which all of them have no photo of themselves. That's all you need to know about them.

Again Malik and Shade, I'm so, so sorry. This is beyond cruel. You all don't deserve this and none of it's true. Not a single word.

And since I am just seeing the stuff being said about Bradley (and Landon possibly) the same goes out to you. You are a gorgeous man, extremely talented and kind.

They are jealous of Soulidified and trying to take you all down. Don't let them!

Oh how I remember, and have everything saved, in December of 2025, how the fans were fighting me tooth and nail that the reports about Zayn knocking Louis's lights out were false. Fans arrogantly laughed at me, called it fake news, and swore that the Zouis documentary would be officially listed on Netflix’s slate on January 7, 2026 as it was promised by Netflix, the production and everyone else involved, obviously before the assault had happened.

My detractors, swore up and down that the Zouis documentary would definitely be listed on Netflix's slate come Jan 7, 2026. They were so cocky about it.

But I was very certain it wouldn't be on there because I believed the assault actually happened. I even bet the fans I'd delete my account if it appeared anywhere on the 2026 Netflix slate released on January 7th. If the reports of Zayn assaulting Louis were fake news, the documentary would have been right there with the rest of them as promised.

However, if I won the bet, then they would need to delete their accounts.

We all already know what happened. The Zouis documentary didn't appear on the slate as it was promised.

Told ya so :)

And months later, when the news re-broke that Zayn assaulted Louis and insulted his dead mother, the same day Louis unfollowed Zayn which confirmed that the assault took place.

But nine months later, the fans have yet to keep their end of the bargain. I haven't brought it up because I've been waiting for them to do the decent thing, keep their word, on their own. Maybe even apologize. I would have let them keep their accounts if they at least apologized to me. Admitted I was right and apologized. But they didn't even do that much. If they had won the bet, they would have expected me and demanded that I keep my word and delete my account.

Now I'm demanding them to delete their accounts. I have every conversation and interaction saved. I will put everyone on blast with screenshot after screenshot. I will never let them forget it.

Anyway, as for the documentary itself, at this point, the best you will get of a Zouis documentary is what was already filmed if anything were to be released. I'm sure there were many lawyers involved after what happened and they did their best to save what was left of this major PR nightmare, injuries that Louis suffered, money lost and images damaged. I'm sure Zayn was on the hook for a lot because he is the one who assaulted Louis. I'm sure Zayn was threatened with major legal action that would have wiped out a mass of his fortune. So I'm sure a deal was struck along the way.

Anyway, I wanted to give an update about it all since it's been over a year since the project was announced and I saw the memories of it being shared on Twitter.