u/Boojo45

I’m in year 13. My parents are very against me moving out for university and believe women should only move out once married. Recently they’ve been talking about me getting married to my relatives back home (my worst fear) and it’s really making me want to escape this house. They currently want me to go to a local university which is like one of the lowest ranked in the UK. I got all 7,8s and 9s in my GCSE’s and I’m predicted AAB. I want to go to a Russel group university but it’s not possible since they are against me moving out for university.
It’s possible they won’t even let me attend the local university because they currently blame that same university for my sister’s disrespectful attitude and she’s planning to cut contact with them just before I start uni so they could react badly and stop me from going all together.
What do I do?

There is a situation that may happen next year just before I start university that could cause problems.

My sister is planning to move out and cut contact with my family. I will be attending the same university she currently goes to and my parents talk about how my sister has become disrespectful ever since she started going to university. For some reason my brain has linked the two and made me believe that when my sister leaves then my parents will restrict me from attending university out of fear that I’ll turn like her.

My education means a lot to me and this uncertainty has me analysing every single thing my parents say, it has me continuously checking for reassurance from my parents that I will still be able to go to university. Once I get my reassurance I expect the thoughts to stop but they come back worse and I keep imaging scenarios in the future where I am helpless and unable to attend university. These thoughts have hindered with my motivation to study because I keep thinking what’s the point.

I got good GCSEs (98888777) and I’m going into year 13 doing chem,bio and psych A-levels. My parents don’t care about my achievements like at all, they don’t even know what A-levels I’m doing and don’t really care what I apply for at university. It’s kind of hard having unsupportive parents because there is literally no one to push me. Does anyone relate or are my parents just odd?

My sister is 20 years old, we come from a Muslim Pakistani immigrant household and my parents are very traditional. My sister told me she is not Muslim, she is lesbian and hates this family. She plans on leaving next year and cutting contact with everyone except me. The problem is that my parents may become extremely strict towards me.
My parents currently blame university for corrupting her and making her disrespectful but the problem is that I start university the same year that she will leave and it’s the same university she currently commutes to, they could potentially not allow me to attend university although I will be commuting.
I will not be considering moving out because I cannot afford it and I currently have a good relationship with my parents.
What do I do in this situation?

If you had an older sibling leave a toxic home and cut contact with parents, how did your parents relationship with you change? Did they stay the same, become more strict or become more lenient?

My elder sister is planning to cut contact with my parents, the problem is I’ll be left behind as I don’t have the finances to move out and also don’t mind living with them at the moment. I’m terrified of my Pakistani immigrant parent’s reaction. How did your parents react when you moved out? Did they become overly strict towards your siblings?

My sister is planning to move out and cut contact with my Muslim immigrant parents. She currently commutes to a local university and I plan to go to the same one. She will move out whilst in 3rd year and I’ll be starting 1st year.

I’m scared of my parents reactions- what if they say I can’t go to university because of her actions because they’ll think I’ll do the same. They can’t physically stop me from attending the university right? It’s very unlikely that they’ll kick me out too.

Should I move out with my sister and face lots of financial difficulties (I’ll likely get minimum sfe and applying for estrangement will be too complicated for first year) or should I stay at home and potentially face my parents trying to block me from attending university but I’ll get the maximum sfe whilst staying home which I can save to move out after my degree?

My parents are Muslim south Asian immigrants. They support the idea of me getting a good job in the future but are not keen on it. I’m in sixth form right now and they act as if me getting an education is up to them. Eg. My mum said “I’m letting you go to school to learn not to mess about” notice how she said “letting you”. One time my dad said to my sister “you’re not going to university” when she was acting up (she literally commutes btw). They also often talk about how their main goal is to get me and my sisters married off. They don’t care about my grades or what I’m doing at school, I don’t think they even know what A-levels I’m doing. They both have minimum wage jobs so know what it’s like to struggle yet don’t support me in my education. When I tell them I’m stressed about exams they don’t seem to understand, they just brush it off.

My sister who is 20 is going to move out of my immigrant brown Muslim household next year. She plans on cutting contact with my parents since she doesn’t have a good relationship with them and doesn’t consider herself a Muslim. She will be going into her 3rd year of uni and currently attends a local university which she commutes to. I am extremely worried about how my parents will react especially how they will treat me after she leaves. I’ll be 18 and starting university and it will likely be the same university she’s going to. How do I deal with my parents after she leaves?

My sister who is 20 is going to move out of my immigrant brown Muslim household next year. She plans on cutting contact with my parents since she doesn’t have a good relationship with them and doesn’t consider herself a Muslim. She will be going into her 3rd year of uni and currently attends a local university which she commutes to. I am extremely worried about how my parents will react especially how they will treat me after she leaves. I’ll be 18 and starting university and it will likely be the same university she’s going to. How do I deal with my parents after she leaves?

I was thinking of going to the university of Bradford to study optometry because it’s ranked 2nd in the Uk for optometry and it’s close to home. I’m just a bit embarrassed since I get really high grades and got the best GCSEs in my secondary school so people would think I would go to a Russell group university. I’ve done some research and I found that the university prestige doesn’t matter for healthcare degrees, is this true? Is it better if I just apply for something like biomedical science at a russel group?

I was thinking of going to the university of Bradford to study optometry because it’s ranked 2nd in the Uk for optometry and it’s close to home. I’m just a bit embarrassed since I get really high grades and got the best GCSEs in my secondary school so people would think I would go to a Russell group university. I’ve done some research and I found that the university prestige doesn’t matter for healthcare degrees, is this true? Is it better if I just apply for something like biomedical science at a russel group?

My sister who is 20 is moving out of a south asian immigrant home next year because my parents are extremely toxic and emotionally abusive towards her. I’m scared of how I will get treated after she leaves- will my parents become incredibly strict? If so, how do I stop them from getting too controlling?

My mind keeps imagining and thinking the worst possible outcome of an event that may happen next year, this anxiety has stopped me from being able to live in the present and enjoy what I used to enjoy. The thing is I don’t know what could happen next year but my mind won’t shut up. Can someone help please

My mum has 6 kids but has never ever been interested in how any of them feel. In fact when one of us is upset we get sworn at and called names by her. For example, I was crying the other day because I was stressed about school and she saw me and asked what’s wrong, when I told her, she said “your ugly ass won’t get far in life”. Another example is when my 3 year old sister cries about being in pain because of constipation, my mum starts swearing at her and saying the most diabolical things like “I’ll put my hand up there and pull your shit out” (sorry if this is disturbing). My elder sister has SH marks all over her arms because of my mum, ever since my sister was little my mum has always told her “I wish you die” or “you’re so ugly and hard to look at”. It’s so hard living with a mum that you can’t talk to because it always results in her calling you names. My mum is only nice to you if you clean the house and make her life easy.

Right now I need to study to get the grades I need to get into university. My sister has talked about wanting to move out next year (the year I go to university). This will drive my strict immigrant parents crazy and I’m scared that they won’t let me go to university because of her actions. I am planning on going to the same university as she does which is a local university and I plan on commuting like my sister does. I cannot study because I keep thinking what if I don’t get to go to university because of her actions. This anxiety keeps me up at night and makes my heart race. What can I do to stop these thoughts?

Right now I need to study to get the grades I need to get into university. My sister has talked about wanting to move out next year (the year I go to university). This will drive my strict immigrant parents crazy and I’m scared that they won’t let me go to university because of her actions. I am planning on going to the same university as she does which is a local university and I plan on commuting like my sister does. I cannot study because I keep thinking what if I don’t get to go to university because of her actions. This anxiety keeps me up at night and makes my heart race. What can I do to stop these thoughts?

I’ll be in year 13 in December and my mum is planning a holiday from 15th of December to 5th of January. My mocks are in early December eg. Start on the 4th of December. I’ll have already submitted my uni application but I’m applying for optometry and so will likely have an interview, I’m worried about the interview dates clashing with the holiday, I also won’t have stable internet in the country so I don’t know if I’ll be able to reply to interview invites. What do I do?

Is it worth commuting 4 hours a day (2 hours to go and 2 hours back) to study at a prestige Russel group uni (university of Manchester) or is it better to just go to a local university that’s around 20 minutes away (university of Bradford). I am going to study optometry and Uni of Bradford surprisingly ranks second highest in the uk for optometry but my dream has always been to go to the University of Manchester. I am unable to move out because of my strict parents.

Basically for my biology alevel end of year 12 mock, I revised using past papers like I usually do. I use this study app called Studocu to do my past papers and it turns out one of the papers I did was the paper used in the mock - I think it was the 2025 paper. But I recognised this during the exam and believe it boosted my performance as I did the paper a few weeks prior so remembered some of the mark scheme answers. Today my teacher told us that some people looked at the mark scheme and so I emailed him telling him my situation and that I am happy to resit the mock in September (my school offers resits to those who do badly anyway). Does he think I am a cheat, what will he think of me?