u/Clarissalayton

Job Interviewers think they are some bigshots with their BS Questions. And with making a candidate nervous. Oh you think you are really smart asking these question and acting all unsettling huh? No you are really stupid and unprofessional.

You are in the power position. Of course the poor guy applying to the job is nervous if you machine gun him with BS Question after BS Question. "Pushing a candidate" in order to see how he reacts in an artificial unnatural environment, gives you exactly 0 usable data about him

It gives the interviewer power over another person, and for a short time they get to feel like the smartest person in the room as they fool candidates with a bunch of dumb gotcha questions they already know the answer to.

They all turn hiring process in to interrogations and psychological or psychiatric evaluation rather checking if skill set align with the company target. Most of the time is just a Grotesque burlesque.

Ja und es ist mir klar dass vieles von dem was ich hier schreibe nicht für alle möglich war und nicht alles Rosa war. Aber heute ist das was früher so halbwegs normal war, fast unmöglich.

Leute die nur mit Matura wo eingestellt wurden, wo heute mindestens ein Master + 5 Jahre Berufserfahrung gefordert werden.

Pensionen wo nur die besten 15 Jahre berücksichtigt wurden.

Arbeit im Schneckentempo mit 1/10 des Zeitdrucks von heute.

Familien die sich ein Haus+Kinder leisten konnten wenn nur der Mann arbeiten war.

Das Beamtentum.

Und erst die Lebebensläufe von manchen Leuten.

Der Wehrschütz z.B. wurde mit nur 26 Chefredakteur einer Wochenzeitung. Heute unmöglich.

Das ist wie eine andere Welt. Eine ruhigere. EInfachere. Heute ist nur noch alles kompliziert und hektisch. Die Hürden und Anforderungen hoch.

By this point I think over 200 chapters of the manga are flashbacks.

And now Brook gets one?

In DBZ when past events were revealed it was done in a panel or a few sentences.

In Fairy Tail the whole Zeref backstory took just 2 or 3 chapters.

There done. No need to have half a Manga volume dedicated to some backstory.

Having constant flashbacks that go over several chapters is just tiresome and bad pacing.

Most young people think about their future and get guidence and help from parents. Then they study something lucrative and have good jobs. Obviously not everyone but a majority.

For us its just survival. We dont think about tomorrow, because we struggle to survive today.

When we turn 18 we then pick the easiest or most familiar topic because we never thought about it and never got help. Then we end up with bad jobs.

One guy I wrote with said then when he went to college with 19 all he did until he was 24 was party because for the first time in his life he was free from the absue. For the first time in his life he was free.

If life is hard you dont look for ways to make it even harder, even if they make it easier in the future. You finaly want to have some good and easy time. You dont think about the fact that it makes life harder in the future. Because you never thought about any of this. Because you were busy surviving.

"I got to where I am exclusively through hard work and smart decisions"

"Luck doesnt exist. You make your own luck"

"If I did it then everyone can make it"

"Stop making excuses. If you work hard you will make it".

I hate this stupid bootstrap talk that just denies circumstances and luck.

1. Everyones situation is different. Just because you made it does not mean that another person will make it even if they do exactly the same things as you did. Geography exists. Differences in Parents exist. Accidents exist. Socioeconomic status exists. Different stimuli in childhood exists.
2. Luck is when things you have no or limited control over and that can go either way turn out in your favor. To deny that you ever had a situation that you had no or limited control over and that could have gone either way but turned out in your favor, is just self - deception.
3. If you look at most successful people, they had good or wealthy parents that supported them. Or a mentor that supported them. Or they got incredibly lucky. Bascially no one has managed to become successful without help from parents/mentor or a healthy dose of luck.

You think Musk would be the richest person on the Planet if he had not rich parents ? Never. Not in a Billion alternate timelines.

You think Taylor would be the pop icon she is now if she had poor abusive parents that would not have lifted a finger to help her? Never. Not in a Billion alternate timelines.

Its just a convenient way to blame the unfortunate/poor, while denying that outside factors play a gigantic role.

Ich bin 33 weiblich. Vor 4 Jahren bin ich mit meinem jetzigen Freund, (35) zusammengezogen. Er studiert immer noch und arbeitet Teilzeit. Er hilft mir auch kaum im Haushalt.

Der Hauptgrund ist weil er ununterbrochen übermäßig viel Zeit mit seiner Familie verschwendet. Keine Zeit zum Aufräumen, er muss mit den Eltern ins Theater. Keine Zeit zu lernen, er muss zum 5. Familienessen dieses Jahr. Er hat seinen Bruder seit 2 Wochen nicht gesehen, das war sooo lange. Daher müssen sie jetzt den ganzen Nachmittag miteinander verbringen.

Hochgerechnet ist er jeden Monat so 6-8x auf irgendeinem Besuch/Essen/Event etc. bei seiner Familie. Dann telefonieren sie noch dazu jeden Tag ca. eine Stunde lang.

Mir ist das mittlerweile viel zu viel. Auf die Besuche komme ich gerne mit, will aber dann meistens nach 5-6 Stunden gehen, wir müssen jedoch 7 oder 8 Stunden dort bleiben. Und wenn ich früher gehen will bin ich die böse.

Ich habe ihm gesagt, dass er seine Zeit priorisieren muss. Sieht er seine Eltern/Bruder halt nur einmal im Monat. Dann hat er genug Zeit um zu lernen und aufzuräumen. Ich sehe meine Eltern und meinen Bruder auch nur so 5-10x im Jahr da wir weiter weg voneinenader wohnen.

Da kommt von ihm der Vorwurft, dass ich ihn "isolieren" will.

Lange Rede, kurzer Sinn: Was macht man mit einem Partner der übertrieben "vermascht" mit seiner Familie ist? Gibt es irgendeinen Weg ihm klarzumachen, dass dieser Kontakt viel zu viel ist und dadurch ich als Partnerin vernachlässigt werde und es nicht gesund ist wenn Sachen wie lernen/aufräumen immer ganz weit unten sind weil man wieder mal die Familie sehen muss?

Er ist ein toller Typ und ich liebe ihn. Er hat so viel Potenzial und eigentlich nur gute Seiten. Bis auf diese fehlende Prioritisierung/seine Familie welche wie eine Sirene auf ihn wirkt.

Můj přítel každý den asi hodinu telefonuje se svými rodiči a bratrem.

Kromě toho s nimi ještě asi dvakrát týdně něco podniká. Navštíví je na celou sobotu, a pak s nimi jde mezi týdnem do kina nebo do divadla. Je mu 35.

Na domácích pracích se za to ale téměř vůbec nepodílí. Řekla jsem mu, že by stačilo s rodinou telefonovat každý druhý den nebo s nimi podnikat něco jen jednou za dva týdny.

S ušetřeným časem by mi mohl pomáhat v domácnosti. On však řekl, že ho chci „izolovat“. Teď nevím, jak dál. Ukončit vztah proto, že mi nepomáhá v domácnosti, zní nějak hloupě.

Na druhou stranu jsem extrémně nešťastná, že investuje veškerý svůj volný čas do své rodiny a mně nepomáhá. A já musím dělat všechno sama.

Most parents help their kids. N-Parents at best dont lift a finger to help you and at worst actively sabotage your possibilities. I was a bright and talented kid. If they supported me I might have become famous or at least studied something complicated and landed a good paying job.

But because they discouraged me from trying anything and because most of my time was occupied with surviving their abuse, I now have a sub standard job and will never be able to afford a house or family.

I also will never have the fond childhood memories of just sitting and laughing with parents. Of enjoying their company. Of vaccations. Of them helping me and I helping them. Just struggle and shouting and toxicity and survival.

Its so unfair. It just hurts so much what could have been but wasnt. What they have taken from us.

The constant stress and tension and pressure makes you sick. It doesnt let you think straight. it disrupts your sleep. It makes you nervous. It makes you tired. It makes you agitated and angry. It increases your blood pressure. It makes your immune system weak and more vulnerable to diseases.

How exactly are you to navigate life, when you are constantly under pressure? How are you to work hard when you are constantly exhausted? How to make smart decisions when you cant think straight? How not to be overly agressive at anyone who does you wrong, when you have to take everything at home? How to havy any self confidence or drive to better yourself when you are constantly demoralized, gaslighted and kept down.

Im sure we all have experienced this. Tell a friend or acquaintance what N-Parents did to you and its:

"Im sure your parents love you"

"They made mistakes. Thats just human"

"Im sure they tried their best"

"Im sure you were a difficlut child"

"It must have been hard for them as well"

"They might have been difficult. We all have our faults. Dont be so hard on them"

People/Society demand understanding and make up excuses for their actions. And what do we get? Victim blaming.

Mostly something like:

" You are exaggerating."

"You made bad life choices"

"Stop feeling sorry for yourself"

"You should have just done "random impractical/bad advice"

"If it was really so hard you should have just left them and become homeless"

"You should have stood up to them. I would have never tolerated this"

"You cant blame them forever. Take responsibility for your life".

We were kids. Parents abused us and fucked us up. They then get the benefit of the doubt. Not us. We get blamed. Its crazy.

How was anything my fault when I was trapped in the middle of nowhere and they refused to drive me?

When they constantly yelled and punished and attacked me?

When they gaslighted us into awkward, immature, wrecks with 0 self confidence or drive because they made us constantly question and doubt our self worth, intelligence and sanity by "remembering things differently" by claiming with absolute confidence that things that were wrong were right?

How was I to navigate life when they gave me bad advice and didnt teach me anything?

How was I to suceed in life when they were so loud that I couldnt sleep until 1 AM, couldnt learn, couldnt concentrate, couldnt think straight?

When I had no energy and my priority NR 1 was just surviving the abuse and getting some peace and good time?

People who have good parents, or at least average ones, who actually help and support them, don’t realize how easy their lives are.

And its absolutely crazy and infuriating that for some reason, they mostly side with N-Parents and make up excuses for them, while blaming us who had to deal with their abuse.

I had narcissistic parents. They were pretty awful. Maybe a 7 out of 10. There are people who had it much worse than I did, but what I went through was hard enough to ruin my life.

I lived in the middle of nowhere. In a small village with about 200 people. There was almost no public transportation there. The nearest major city was 15 miles away. And my parents refused to drive me anywhere. I had no internet, no library, no friends, nothing. It was a 2 mile walk to the next train station.

They constantly yelled at me, manipulated me, and told me I was worthless. They destroyed my self-confidence and turned me into a shy and frightened person.

They wouldn’t let me sleep. My father watched TV with the volume turned up loud every night until 1 a.m. I had to get up at 6 a.m. So most nights I slept no more than 5 hours.

I didn’t get any help from them. Instead, they just put obstacles in my way. So I didn’t do well in school, and I didn’t have any friends because I was weird, shy, and withdrawn.

I was immature, behaving like a 15 year old when I was 25. This also ruined my life. I was afraid from authority. I was afraid to fail because it meant punishment. I was always angry and confrontational. If I had to take all that Sh*t at home I wouldnt take anything from anyone else. This also ruined lots of possiblities for me.

Because of that, I have a bad job now and suffer from sleep disorders.

People who have good parents, or at least average ones, who actually help and support them, don’t realize how easy their lives are.

But what chance did I have? None. I was abused and poor. And then nasty asshole people who had it easy in life dare to victim blame you for "making bad choices" in life. And tell you to "stop feeling sorry for yourself" or tell you that the first 20 or 25 or 30 years "dont matter". I hate these ignorant stupid assholes so much. And I hate that the deck was stacked against me right from the start, while others who were less intelligent or competent got handed a Royal Flush.

I had narcissistic parents. They were pretty awful. Maybe a 7 out of 10. There are people who had it much worse than I did, but what I went through was hard enough to ruin my life.

I lived in the middle of nowhere. In a small village with about 200 people. There was almost no public transportation there. The nearest major city was 15 miles away. And my parents refused to drive me anywhere. I had no internet, no library, no friends, nothing. It was a 2 mile walk to the next train station.

They constantly yelled at me, manipulated me, and told me I was worthless. They destroyed my self-confidence and turned me into a shy and frightened person.

They wouldn’t let me sleep. My father watched TV with the volume turned up loud every night until 1 a.m. I had to get up at 6 a.m. So most nights I slept no more than 5 hours.

I didn’t get any help from them. Instead, they just put obstacles in my way. So I didn’t do well in school, and I didn’t have any friends because I was weird, shy, and withdrawn.

I was immature, behaving like a 15 year old when I was 25. This also ruined my life. I was afraid from authority. I was afraid to fail because it meant punishment. I was always angry and confrontational. If I had to take all that Sh*t at home I wouldnt take anything from anyone else. This also ruined lots of possiblities for me.

Because of that, I have a bad job now and suffer from sleep disorders.

People who have good parents, or at least average ones, who actually help and support them, don’t realize how easy their lives are.

But what chance did I have? None. I was abused and poor. And then nasty asshole people who had it easy in life dare to victim blame you for "making bad choices" in life. And tell you to "stop feeling sorry for yourself" or tell you that the first 20 or 25 or 30 years "dont matter". I hate these ignorant stupid assholes so much. And I hate that the deck was stacked against me right from the start, while others who were less intelligent or competent got handed a Royal Flush.

There is a new trend out there. On Tik Tok, Youtube and other social media. People supposedly reading hundreds of books a year. Like 300 or 400 or 500. The sky is the limit. One Tik Toker I saw claimed that she has read 541 books last year.

People will not believe you anyways because these numbers sound like outright lies and exaggerations. So why brag or lie on social media if at least half the people wont believe it anyways? Why brag at all?

Even if someone managed to read 300 or 400 books a year, practically all of them would have to be light and short books of some 100-200 page lenght. No classics or complicated books. No non fiction books. No long 300+ page books. And whats the point to read 300 Mangas, Comics, Graphic Novels, light romance, crime, young adult novels in a year? Day after day after day? Nonstop for the entire year? But not a single book about phylosophy or history or a long classic like the Hyperion novels or Quo Vadis?

Just lying about completing impossible reading challenges to gain views and attention.