u/CupOne7656

TLDR at the bottom!

Hi! I’m sure this question has been asked plenty of times before but I would like advice for my situation.

To start off I am about to be a sophomore in college and so is my ex. I met her before college started and we became best friends and eventually started dating. She used to be a lesbian and then became bisexual when we started dating.

We were dating for about 4 months and things we going really well and then one day she texted me saying that she might want to breakup when school starts back. She said that for her sophomore year she didn’t want to feel like she was tied down by anyone. she wanted to explore and have fun and then things might change junior year. I freaked out and we had an argument and she ended it by breaking up with me over text. she told me I was the healthiest relationship she’s ever had and that it has nothing to do with me but just the fact the we were in a relationship. I was devastated since then. I eventually texted her a couple days ago saying I want to go no contact and then said a few words that I’m not proud of. She texted back saying that she didn’t mean to end things the way they did. She was trying to slowly bring up the idea of an open relationship but since I freaked out about her wanting to end our relationship she assumed I didn’t want an open relationship.

The thing is I’ve have only ever been in monogamous relationships and so has she. The thing is idk what her idea of an open relationships is. I am assuming her version is not really an emotional attachment but purely just a sexual one. Like one night stands and stuff. I’m currently waiting on a reply for what open relationship means to her.

The things is idk if I want an open relationship. I am sort of a jealous guy and am afraid that I might feel even worse that she’s sleeping with others. But also I might be open to trying it. I truly am so in love with this girl and I absolutely love her family. I want to be with her again but I am scared that if she tries someone else that she might fall for them instead of me. Or if I try a different girl that I just be depressed cause it might feel like I’m cheating on her when I’m not. But again this is all just speculation as I’ve only been in monogamous relationships before.

If we try an open relationship and then I don’t enjoy it I don’t know if I could ever be friends with her again which is devastating to me because she’s basically my only friend in college. Please help me with advice!

TL;DR: My ex-girlfriend (both of us are college sophomores) broke up with me because she didn’t want to feel tied down and wanted to explore during sophomore year. After we broke up, she told me she hadn’t actually wanted to end the relationship. She was trying to bring up the idea of an open relationship instead, but thought I wasn’t open to it after I reacted badly. I’ve only ever been in monogamous relationships, and I’m worried I’d be too jealous or get hurt if she slept with other people. I’m also worried that if I tried sleeping with other people, I’d just feel guilty and depressed because it would feel like I was cheating on her, even though it wouldn’t be. I still love her and want to get back together, but I’m afraid an open relationship could make things even worse or permanently ruin our friendship if it doesn’t work out. I’m waiting to hear what an “open relationship” actually means to her and would appreciate advice from people with experience.

TLDR at the bottom

Hi! I’m sure this question has been asked plenty of times before but I would like advice for my situation.

To start off I am about to be a sophomore in college and so is my ex. I met her before college started and we became best friends and eventually started dating. She used to be a lesbian and then became bisexual when we started dating.

We were dating for about 4 months and things we going really well and then one day she texted me saying that she might want to breakup when school starts back. She said that for her sophomore year she didn’t want to feel like she was tied down by anyone. she wanted to explore and have fun and then things might change junior year. I freaked out and we had an argument and she ended it by breaking up with me over text. she told me I was the healthiest relationship she’s ever had and that it has nothing to do with me but just the fact the we were in a relationship. I was devastated since then. I eventually texted her a couple days ago saying I want to go no contact and then said a few words that I’m not proud of. She texted back saying that she didn’t mean to end things the way they did. She was trying to slowly bring up the idea of an open relationship but since I freaked out about her wanting to end our relationship she assumed I didn’t want an open relationship.

The thing is I’ve have only ever been in monogamous relationships and so has she. The thing is idk what her idea of an open relationships is. I am assuming her version is not really an emotional attachment but purely just a sexual one. Like one night stands and stuff. I’m currently waiting on a reply for what open relationship means to her.

The thing is idk if I want an open relationship. I am sort of a jealous guy and am afraid that I might feel even worse that she’s sleeping with others. But also I might be open to trying it. I truly am so in love with this girl and I absolutely love her family. I want to be with her again but I am scared that if she tries someone else that she might fall for them instead of me. Or if I try a different girl that I just be depressed cause it might feel like I’m cheating on her when I’m not. But again this is all just speculation as I’ve only been in monogamous relationships before.

If we try an open relationship and then I don’t enjoy it I don’t know if I could ever be friends with her again which is devastating to me because she’s basically my only friend in college. Please help me with advice!

TL;DR: My ex-girlfriend (both of us are college sophomores) broke up with me because she didn’t want to feel tied down and wanted to explore during sophomore year. After we broke up, she told me she hadn’t actually wanted to end the relationship. She was trying to bring up the idea of an open relationship instead, but thought I wasn’t open to it after I reacted badly. I’ve only ever been in monogamous relationships, and I’m worried I’d be too jealous or get hurt if she slept with other people. I’m also worried that if I tried sleeping with other people, I’d just feel guilty and depressed because it would feel like I was cheating on her, even though it wouldn’t be. I still love her and want to get back together, but I’m afraid an open relationship could make things even worse or permanently ruin our friendship if it doesn’t work out. I’m waiting to hear what an “open relationship” actually means to her and would appreciate advice from people with experience.

So for some context, I was a first-year college student last year. I am an electrical engineering major, and so I didn't really have any good friends except for this girl that I met on Instagram. She was a human biology major. When we first met, things were kind of awkward because we had only talked online, but after a while we became best friends. I didn't really have any other friends that I talked to that much.

She was a lesbian in high school and didn't really like men that much, but I guess she made an exception for me. We were a lot like Steve and Robin from Stranger Things. I basically did everything with her, and if I didn't do it with her, I basically didn't do it. We watched movies together, went to parties together, and I basically was always in her dorm room.

I eventually started to gain feelings for her after we dressed up as Coraline and Wybie (everyone tells me I look exactly like Wybie, and she has dyed hair) for Halloween. Over the whole first semester, she was sort of questioning her sexuality because she had only ever been attracted to women, so she didn't really know if she liked guys. She said she wanted to "try a guy" to find out for sure. She didn't want to make some guy feel bad if she tried a guy and didn't like it, so she asked me if I would be the guy she tried, and so I said yes. She eventually liked it and said she might be bisexual, and so after that we started hooking up and then started dating in March.

I should also mention that she has a history of mental health problems, as she is bipolar. So she changes her mind about things QUITE OFTEN. So at first she rejected me because she said, "I didn't want to hurt you if I went crazy." I didn't really care because I was in love with this girl. Eventually she said yes.

We were happy for the rest of the semester, and then it was summer break, and we went back home, and she lived about 5 hours away. We still talked every day, and I made a plan to visit her and her family for a week. When I went, everything was great, and we had such a fun time. About a week after I went home, I received a text from her basically saying, "Hey, I don't wanna scare you, but when we get back to school I might not want a relationship anymore," and of course I was scared because I didn't want to lose her.

We had a conversation for a while, and she told me that she just didn't want to feel like she was tied down to anyone. I said, "Did I do something bad?" and she told me, "No, quite the opposite. You are the healthiest relationship I've ever had, and I love you." She wanted me to make sure I knew that it wasn't me that was the problem, it was the relationship that was the problem. I asked her why, and she said she didn't really know. I was starting to get really scared, so I said, "I plan on using our school's free therapist center when we get back, so maybe you should too. I think they might help you figure out why you feel this way. It might help or it might not, but it doesn't hurt to try."

She then freaked out a little and said she had therapists before and they were helpful, but she doesn't think a therapist would help. Then she just said that she didn't think it would work out and then broke up with me.

I haven't really messaged her since then. It's been a couple days since then, and she reached out and said, "You can ignore this if you want, but I wanted to ask how you're doing, and if you want to talk, I'm here." But I have no clue what to say or if I even want to.

I don't think I can go back to just being her friend, but I also don't want to lose the only friend I have at college. So right now I am just hoping that she might change her mind and come back like she did the first time.

TL;DR: My (20M) girlfriend (19F), who was also my best and pretty much only friend in college, broke up with me because she said she doesn't want to feel "tied down," even though she said I was the healthiest relationship she's ever had and that I didn't do anything wrong. A few days later she reached out asking how I was doing and said she's there if I want to talk. I don't think I can go back to just being friends, but I also don't want to lose the only close friend I have at college. I'm not sure what to do.

I have a 6’11 C with a 7’3 wingspan. I have a 90 standing dunk and driving dunk and 83 vert with gold rise up. But everytime I’m standing under the basket with a guy a little close to me it does a layup instead of yamming it. Do I need a better rise up or something or do I need to be fully open to dunk it or something.