u/Cute-Estate-312

I’m mid 30’s F and husband is early 30s. This is my first marriage. His second. When we met I knew we were very different people. Besides our love for extreme sports, pretty much we are the opposites with everything (politics, interests, values,etc), but something I saw in him, which felt like the thing that was missing in all my other relationships, was his desire to work on himself.

He would often ask how he could be a better partner, what‘s on my mind, apologize first after arguments, even if we were both at fault-just basic emotional intelligence things that felt like such green flags, and very much husband material lol.

Well, he doesn’t do any of that anymore. When we were in couples therapy I asked him why, and he said I ask too much of him already, and nothing he does is ever enough. Honestly this could be partly true; I grew up around people who went to college, had good careers, were educated. He did not. I think my upbringing contributes to me feeling like he’s not trying hard enough, and doesn’t have high enough aspirations for himself...So how do I get past this critical thinking?/ what do I do about this?

I also feel like I’m always nagging him to do normal things, like go to the doctors, remembering to take the dogs inside after walking them, drinking less, etc. He doesn’t ask anything of me, besides to have more sex with him, which I do/ try to do. I love him very much but I just wish he was the same guy I fell for, who desired to improve himself.

TLDR, my husband doesn’t try to work on himself or our relationship anymore, and I don’t know how to get myself to be less critical of him.

I have ADHD and work with primarily neurodivergent clients. With clients who talk a normal amount, I am great at pausing before speaking, reflecting, asking insightful questions.

However with my big talkers, the kind that could easily fill up 55 minutes with their own words, I find that in my effort to slow them down, or get a word in, I blurt out "non therapeutic" things [Nothing terrible, usually it's my own opinion on what they said, or my ideas about their various theories] It's like my brain is like "Hey just say whatever you can to contribute to this session."

-So, besides things like interrupting the client to slow down, or get into their body (which I can do on occasion), what are ways you have been able to stay focused, professional, and therapeutic when you notice your brain wanting to say unhelpful things.-

I am a step-mom to my husband's two kids. I used to hate being around them because they are so chaotic, but as they grow older I am not as bothered. Well, we only get to see them for a month once a year, and when they got dropped off this time my husband cried and asked me to have a baby. I have no desire to have a child. Never had, never will.

My sisters daughter however, is so adorable, like the cutest kid I have ever seen. I spoke to my mom about my husband crying to me, and she told me I would love my kid more than I love my dog (I'm obsessed with my dog). Has any female here had a kid when they had no desire to be a mom, and end up liking it? I am heavily leaning towards no but would like to hear other stories.

when I first started on 30mg I would wake up with so much energy, and the a few hrs later get tired and stay tired. my psych increased it to 60 for the effective dose to take effect, and now theres no energy, just lack of anxiety and motivation throughout the day. Should I take it af night? I’m just sick of trying out meds ..ugh!- also I e been on it for 6 months .

Therapist here. I have many people pleaser's who will not talk about certain things because it's "inappropriate," or in poor taste. As a non-people pleaser, my first reaction is to say "This is your time, you can talk about whatever you want to talk about." For reference, I'm a female and have mostly male clients worried about these things. So do I just drop it, and let them talk about these things when they feel comfortable enough around me, or is there some other way to help people pleasers feel more comfortable being themselves?

I have a client who (I believe) was missdiagnosed with schizotypal personality disorder. I diagnosed him instead with PTSD based off history and my view of "paranoia" from a sociological perspective. This client, sometimes misstakenly, sometimes correctly, believes he is being misstreated because of his race. Sometimes he will say things happened because of his race, which could not be true based on circumstances (i.e no one could have known his race in certain contexts). Am I right in believing he does not have schizotypal personality disorder and that the paranoia comes from racism? -I know no one can diagnose based off this, but if this were a case study what other factors would come into play?

I own a unit in a condo which is between 2 other condos. constantly people walk from the street to the condo behind us and leave garbage everywhere. Recently a wooden fence was installed to prevent this, but it keeps getting broken down by the hoodlums going from one neighborhood to the next. I have put the fence back up a few times with screws but it keeps getting broken, and now there’s just broken fence everywhere. is there something mean but not illegal I can do to prevent people from crossing?

My HOA managmenet company is total trash, but this isnt what the post is about. On multiple occasions I have volunteered to prune the bushes and do maintenance but they say I’m not allowed to, tha they have to go with an outside company. However, there are no attempts to get a company to do these things, so we’re just left with a rachet looking yard, and still paying $7000 per year (all of us total) for yard work that no one’s doing.

So, I know this is unethical, but I also don’t feel like it harms clients, and I don’t think it makes sense. And yes, I know the thinking of “this rule doesn’t make sense so I shouldn’t have to follow it” is a slippery slope, but here goes my question:

Given that pure couples counseling (the couple as the patient) isn’t accepted by insurance, yet many therapists still bill couples under 90847 with the rationale that the other partner is part of the family system [which is murky in some circles but totally accepted in others] why can’t I bill 90837 with the identified patient while the other partner is documented as the support person?

I guess what I’m asking is: who is the fraud actually hurting in that scenario?

What is the likelihood of getting claw-backs if you document sessions as individual sessions with spouse present?

Another thing that’s true in my state is that people can no longer have 2 sessions in a day, even if one is individual and one is family therapy. I’m only mentioning that to point out that this wouldn’t be taking away from the potential types of sessions a client could otherwise have in one day if I were to bill this way.

So a few months ago I got tested for ASD. I have been diagnosed with ADHD since age 8, but over the years people said, "You seem autistic." So, even though I know the DSM5tr clearly lists for ASD you must have 2 out of 4 be true for the Restricted/Repetitive Behaviors categories, and I only have 1, I thought "maybe autism testing has more discreet criteria then the DSM?". And, alas, I was not diagnosed with ASD, but given an additional diagnosis of social anxiety. So anyway, whenever I see videos, posts, just people talking, and saying things like, "you may have autism if you..."that are very true for me, I am filled with annoyance. Taking things literally, highly sensitive to all senses, bad at making and keeping friends, easily emotionally dysregulated, doesn't make you(me) autistic. I guess I am annoyed that the neurodivergence community just decided to have their own definition of autism, only loosely based on DSM criteria. Can anyone relate?