u/Icy-Hovercraft-1375

I am one of many, but gen need some tips or whimsy to get better. I am reaching lvl 40 with him soon on consol and I gen feel like nothing had gotten better. I am only maybe helpful when my team is already kinda good and absolutely throw when others aren’t rocking it either.

I don’t wanna be a pain in the ass in ranked so I am bagging so much- pleaseeeee give me some enlightenment.

The hardest stuff for me to do is get a good balance when it comes to heal and taking picks on the enemy back line.

Also 1v1s (my aim is shit) and getting proper height with him. Somehow I need to look up at the universe to get upwards which is such a pain bc I can’t see where I am going.

And yas. I am a console victim. But I love him so much.

I am 22F female I am 158cm tall and weight around 48kg and 50kgs. I don’t smoke I don’t drink.

think my medical issues are starting to give me intense phases of feeling very very unwell mentally. There isn’t a single day where I don’t feel any kind of pain. From manageable to truly horrible, can’t-move-and-laying-in-darkness kind of pain. Even the manageable pain isn’t just manageable anymore. It’s starting to make me tired 24/7 and put me in an awful mood.

Now, a bit more detail. I have had migraines since I was 7, but they never came extremely recently. Maybe once every 2–3 months. Nothing which bothered me and was just a lil unfortunate, at least I could skip a day of school kind of situation.

Now, since a year after having Covid for the second time (even worse than my first time), it started to get absolutely awful. Not saying it’s connected, but I use it as a time stamp for myself. It’s been around 1 and a half years since then.

It started with extreme tiredness the whole day, never really felt fit. And then it suddenly started with mild headaches that turned into hospital-kind-of headaches because I genuinely thought I was dying or having a stroke. They didn’t find anything. Great. The headaches stayed, and my 1 every two months headache turned into 31 days a month headache, around half being genuinely horrible migraines which cost me my job.

I have gotten really bad memory issues and I feel cloudy every day. Like I can’t think or see what’s in front of me properly because my head feels like it’s full of fog. I am clumsier, my joints hurt, I feel dizzy and sick as if I am getting a fever some days, but I am not.

I have moments of feeling nauseous where I need to sit down, and suddenly the skin around my face feels extremely tight and my vision pulls together. It doesn’t feel like I faint, but it’s weird moments of my brain just clicking off.

I had a bunch of CTs, MRIs, and blood checks, but NOTHING. Only figured out I am apparently now allergic to the liquid they give u before, which I didn’t have before. Also nuts. I am now allergic to nuts. Two rndm new allergies.

I had horrible vision issues in my right eye, with its vision being insanely blurry and having double vision, but my eye doc said everything seemed fine.

And all the doctors go, “good news! Everything alright,” but I genuinely want to cry every time they say everything is fine because clearly, CLEARLY something is so wrong and it’s costing me my life.

I can’t function anymore. The only reason I am not homeless is because I was allowed to move back in with my parents. I can’t earn my own money right now. The doctor my neurologist told me everything is fine and to make a headache diary for 6 months and then come back. What am I supposed to do in these 6 months? I feel like I will eventually die to all the pain. I feel like my whole body burns every day. I never wake up rested. Never.

The first time I told myself I was a boy, or one of the boys, was when I was just 6. I came out as trans when I was 13, but my mental health and fear were overwhelming, so I never ended up transitioning. I was very masc-presenting and looked like a little boy. But puberty made everything a lot worse. My family never properly supported me, always sticking with she/her pronouns and my deadname.
I had, and still have, a lot of self-hatred that goes in so many directions that I can’t properly pinpoint where it’s coming from anymore.

At around 19, I started growing my hair out and realized how much easier I had it around people in real life when I didn’t look the way I did before. So I started being girly again, liking feminine clothes and long hair. And I have never seen my mum so happy as when I started being her little girl again.

At 21, I could tell how horrible I felt being just a girl, so I settled on being non-binary and let my family believe I was a girl. The feminine clothes stayed, and so did the name and pronouns. I told myself to just push through until I moved out and met new people and friends who would get to know me differently.

I am 23 now, and something that has never stopped, though, is the intense pain in my chest when I read certain books or watch movies with male actors and characters. I get sad and horribly jealous, telling myself that should be me and wondering what I’m doing here acting the way I do. These moments completely throw me off because I can sit here for months feeling alright with being non-binary or being seen as a girl.

Was I just ignoring it so well? I am genuinely a mess and don’t know who I am.

Lifeweaver in a 1vs1 fist fight. My friend says it’s a 50/50 bc he is physical weak while I think I would easily loose bc he is definitely able to swing and hit hard. He keeps saying because of his lore it’s says clearly he is weak without his tech but I think that’s not trueeee.