u/Lemon_Nede

I have a couple friends I hang out with regularly ever since school got out, and we are all seniors heading to college. We've made like charms together and went to each other's houses, and I even made the effort to hangout with a few of them personally to try and further bonds... Butttt it seems like, all my life, no matter how close I am with someone they always finds someone they are closer with. That's not bad either, but I was wondering if what I wanted WAS just a closer, more best friend related friendship? Is there a possible reason I feel like this despite hanging out with these group of friends who explicitly invite me as well as our other friends? I feel like it's just like a big group thing, and that might be why I don't feel like I'm super close with anyone since I'm trying to be close with all of them at once. Is that not how it could work? Am I even making friends right by doing this? And, when I go to college, will I really just forget my friends? Is that even so bad, despite all the time we spent together? Lots of questions. For context I have ADHD so if that helps at all. Any advice is appreciated! Not intended to be a vent or rant either, just very confused

Upcoming freshman here, just wondering how it might be?

As of now I would say I have friends, and I hang out with them a lot sure, but I don't think I am "close" or "best friends" with any of them like how they are with each other. So I was wondering how making friends would be like in college, since I heard that's where people make their best friends for life or something. But also, from my current college friend, they reported they didn't really keep most their friends from last year. So I'm just concerned if it'll be easier making friends or not, and if I'd even get close with them? Any tips on how to make college friends too?

What's a normal friendship supposed to look like as you leave highschool and enter college? I've known this pool of people my whole life, and then recently found a group that I regular hangout with either as a whole or individually ever since junior year. But I get this nagging feeling I'm not as good as friends with them as they are with others. During school, when we saw each other everyday through extracurriculars and stuff it was easier.

Now I can even get a little jealous when I see friends hanging out together and I'm not invited, but that's something I try to ignore because I do the same thing and I know logically there's no hard feelings.

Then college is gonna be different since there's these completely new people. I'm just not sure how to really be a friend or how to see a friendship if that makes sense.

Are they supposed to text you randomly? Because I do that with a few people because I want to stay in contact but they don't always do that to me. And then is it normal if I suggest to hangout but it never really gets anywhere? Or, even if it does, I'm usually the one suggesting it.. but if other people suggest a hangout then I'm still invited and I do know they genuinely like me to some degree. How often are you supposed to hangout? How do I get closer with friends without being so clingy? They tend to call a lot and so I try to join, but calling really isn't my thing and I much prefer to see people in person.

This might be RSD, because I don't really feel this way on my medicine but I've been off it for a few days so maybe that's why all my anxiety is coming back? I'm not really sure. Advice is appreciated!

I've thought about it a lot, but I guess because I can genuinely come out now at my college AND I will have access to HRT is making it worse but I'm genuinely sick a wreck right now thinking about my dad. 18 years of being the only parent there for me, with 3 daughters being "failures" (made a lot of bad decisions), one son, and I unfortunately am the one who's non-binary. I don't plan to tell him anything - at least not until I'm 21+ and out of the house because years ago when I was maybe 13 he said if I was or any of us were trans he'd kick us out of the house.. But I also don't want him to die and then that be the moment I can finally be myself. That makes me feel so bad. I'd rather take the chance of him possible being able to accept me than him die and never knowing... But also, how do I ever go about that? I'm so terrified and sick to my stomach thinking about how he may accept that 21+ years of being there for me for every event and every part of my life was a failure and that his fourth daughter turned out to be a dud, too. The thing is, I don't even care if I'm his daughter still. In fact, that's fine. I'm genderqueer/nonbinary anyway and I'd say largely I'm fluid... Idk it's a little complicated to explain right now but I know what I am for sure. I've tried changing and even looked into therapy to change that but I've accepted I can't change because that's genuinely who I am. I am non-binary no doubt about it. I've realized that if he doesn't accept me I'd have to move on, anyway, but losing my dad would absolutely kill me. I'm just not sure how I'd go about it when the time comes, or what to think. Father's Day is also soon. I can't look at him without thinking how he might not love me anymore.

Has anyone who is trans and/or nonbinary had experience in a frat or sorority? How did it go? Did they know? Were they accepting? Lots of questions about the general experience because I plan to be out when I go to college, and I'm interested in Greek life a lot. I'm a left leaning area so it's not unheard of, but just from others I'd like to hear the general experience, if any.

I don't think that's too uncommon for anyone who takes medication, but I'm just confused as to why I don't like it. I think it's because I feel like I'm not going my true self? Or I hate that I can't just be normal? Something silly like that. With my meds, though, I know they help greatly with my emotional regulation, overstimulation, and general anxiety. When I'm on my medicine consistently, even if I don't notice it at the time, I can tell afterwards that I can comprehending things a lot better without getting overwhelmed and I'm actually able to function normally . To a degree. I don't even feel funny physically (when I take them consistently), I just don't know why I hate taking them so much. Is this just a common thing with ADHD medicine?

There's a trans barber near me, about 45 minutes away. That'd be fine, however I'm not sure how I'm supposed to get there. I'm eighteen, but I still live with my dad (of course because I just turned eighteen like a few months ago). He usually ends up taking me to hair appointments because all the good ones are like an hour away, but I'm not sure how to tell him this place might be the best for me. It's very visibly queer, and I know he'd do my hair justice for sure. It's also a pay what you can, so that's even better for someone who doesn't have much money. I just don't know how to get there since my car going that far probably wouldn't make it, plus he'd want to know where I'm going if it's that far... And if I got a friend to drive me he'd still want to know where I was going. I guess I could lie and say I was getting a haircut at some normal place, but he'd probably want to know the barber's name too 💔. Any other ideas? I feel like I'm at a loss here.

Not inherently a bad thing, but I am eighteen. It's been for a while now I've liked older men and I'm pretty sure it's just due to some familial issues probably. Regardless, point of coming here was because I know it's stigmatized and I can't really talk about it because I'm, again, eighteen. It'd be weird if I said I wanted a guy my father's age. I know it's an issue and I'm trying to stop myself but honestly I just can't stop thinking about it. It's most likely a phase and it's not the worst thing in the world, but I've just felt real guilty about it. I should like someone my age, or at least near it.

I've definitely experienced emotional neglect with my mother, and then in early childhood with my dad and brother and probably a lot of areas, but at least my dad and brother are now nicer and my dad specifically has improved so much. Even then, recently I've found I can hardly express real emotion when talking to them. Sometimes they still get mad or angry, and that's fine, but they're actually more happy than angry nowadays. So, when my dad is talking about taking us somewhere to go do something or like we want to plan something between the three of us, I for some reason just blank out? Like not dissociative, but I do become a lot less expressive. It makes me upset too because I genuinely just don't know how else to act. I think the reason I do is because I'm getting angry, but again, why?? I don't understand why I get so frustrated when they're both acting incredibly normal and being genuinely nice. I have a feeling it might be due to emotional neglect? But again, still figuring out, so if anyone relates or has any advice please let me know

I did just start to come out in school, so I know it'll take a minute. One thing I can do is correct the people mid conversation, but that always feels rude or just mean. That, plus awkward. And if I try to talk to them after, well, I don't even know if they'll Rene since it's like second nature to them since the pronouns they used I've been using all my life until now. Just how do I correct people and when do I do so? Anyway to make it less awkward, or feel less bad about it? I just feel like a nuisance or something when I go to.