u/Live-Message-4358

I wasn't feeling like I was getting better after two years (among other issues) so I terminated with both my therapist and psychiatrist and got new ones. While I think I've settled on a decent therapist and psychiatrist now I can't help but compare to my old therapist and psychiatrist. I see now that while they weren't perfect they were actually a good fit for me and after two years of course there would be ups and downs. Another issue complicating things is I did have some sort of transference with both of them. With my therapist I felt like he was a friend, and with my psychiatrist it was more like I felt like he was my dad or something. I'm finding I was more bonded to them than I cared to admit and I miss them now. I'm not sure I did what's best for me but I'm also not sure if I just feel that way because of the transference.

When I terminated with them I think I blindsided them and I didn't want a termination session with my therapist. I felt like it would be too hard for me. Did I reach a point of no return? Does it make more sense to continue with my new therapist and psychiatrist and see how it goes? I feel lost.

I'm selling my 2022 Subaru Crosstrek Sport to Driveway and there is some minor cosmetic damage on the bumper of my car that is covered by a plastic bumper cover (the ones that you commonly see on vehicles that cover the top of the bumper). There is also a scratch on the rear door. I'm not sure how either happened.

They saw the rear door scratch on the virtual inspection and said it wasn't a big deal. I told them about the other damage and they brushed me off and said it wasn't a big deal either but now I'm worried about the next person taking the plastic cover off and seeing the damage and feeling bad about it. They didn't adjust my offer for either.

I don't really know how to describe the damage. It's sort of like the edge of the bumper was slightly shaved down. No exposed metal from what I remember. It's just a few inches long. What should I do in this situation? Should I be more insistent about it or should I just let it go? With the plastic bumper cover the damage is not visible.

I'm in the market for a new psychiatrist. I think I may have found one but I need to see him more to decide. It's gotten me wondering about what makes a good psychiatrist.

My old psychiatrist wouldn't listen to me when I brought up unpleasant side effects, and instead would make suggestions such as to drink more coffee if a medication was making me tired. So I'd say a good psychiatrist is willing to listen to concerns regarding side effects.

What else makes a good psychiatrist? Is it empathy? Listening skills? Willingness to collaborate in your care with you?

I'm diagnosed bipolar and I have a friend who supposedly has it too. I say supposedly because I think he might be misdiagnosed. For one, he does not understand what bipolar is. He thinks it means mood swings - like "manic" for an hour or being in a bad mood for a day. We are close and I've never heard him talk about a manic or hypomanic episode, he will just say he's a little "manic" which to him means hyper. He doesn't deal with depression.

What I think he has is ADHD. He always seems a little hypomanic. I think he got the bipolar diagnosis at some point and it's stuck with him. He takes a mood stabilizer (one that isn't good for mania) but I think it doesn't do much for him. I feel weird bringing it up because I'm not a psychologist or psychiatrist, but at the same time I really do think he's misdiagnosed. I'm concerned that he's on meds he doesn't need and if he does have ADHD he isn't being treated for that. How would you bring this up to a friend? Bipolar seems to be a big part of his identity as he was diagnosed when he was young. And as I said I'm not a professional so I feel a little weird having these judgements.

If you love your job, what do you do? How did you figure out that you wanted to do it? I'm currently feeling very lost and like I will never find a job that I don't dislike.

My old therapist and psychiatrist were basically a team. My therapist works closely with my psychiatrist. I fired my therapist because he was falling asleep in session a lot and didn't know much about bipolar disorder, for example thought I was hypomanic whenever I was in a good mood and didn't know it was for life until I corrected him. He also would just kind of sit and stare at me, long awkward silences were the norm.

I saw my psychiatrist and he told me he would no longer be seeing me because I switched therapists.

It's a bad situation for me because I'm in a depressive episode and am extremely anxious on top of it. I'm a PhD student and need to take a medical leave of absence or I'll have a mental breakdown. I just don't know what to do now and I'm worried I won't be able to take leave because of this.

My dose of Seroquel (instant release) was increased to 200 mg and shortly after taking it I experienced an episode of SVT for the first time. I called 911 because I thought I was having some sort of heart attack and when I got to the ER they stopped it with Valsalva.

When SVT happened, I felt a couple flutters as I was laying on my left side and then the pounding started which I learned was SVT. Seroquel would make my heart race shortly after taking it. Is it possible that I don't have an extra electrical pathway and the Seroquel caused the SVT somehow? I'm also on Lamictal. Could this have interacted with the Seroquel to cause this? I was 39 when this happened and had never had SVT before in my life.

So I posted not too long ago asking if people are bored reading papers and many people said no. This kind of surprised me because when I try reading papers related to my research I am completely bored. Furthermore I find writing about my topic excruciating because I'm just not interested. It's something my advisor wanted me to work on. I've been feeling really unmotivated and I'm wondering if science isn't the right path for me or if it's just that I picked the wrong topic. How do you know if you've found the right topic for your PhD?

Has anyone tried these for anxiety? What side effects did you experience? My psychiatrist is suggesting one or the other. My anxiety is SO BAD and I need some relief. Tried gabapentin already and that did nothing for me except made me feel dizzy.

One issue is that I have a heart arrhythmia and I already take metoprolol for that so he wants me to switch from metoprolol to propranolol. But with Buspar we would be adding it on. So I worry about how these medications will affect my heart too.

I had my own experience being on the receiving end of peer support specialist services after I got out of a stay in a CPEP. This has me interested in becoming a peer support specialist myself. However, I'm wondering if I can handle it. Is it emotionally taxing? What's it like doing that kind of work?

My mental health has been unbelievably bad throughout my PhD and I'm at my breaking point. I need to take a leave of absence. During my leave, I plan to decide if I want to quit my PhD or not. I'm wanting to hear from people who've taken a leave of absence before. How did you tell your advisor? If you were thinking of quitting, did you mention it? What was it like returning to the PhD afterwards?

I have a 2022 Subaru Crosstrek Sport with 17k miles on it. I'm gearing up to sell it but I can't for another month or maybe two. In the mean time it will be mostly sitting. It has a full tank of gas right now and I'd like to add fuel stabilizer to it to prevent the fuel from degrading, but the guy at the auto parts store said it will only work if I add is to a quarter tank. Is this true? Is it okay to add fuel stabilizer to an almost full tank?

I'm a PhD student and thinking of mastering out of my program (leaving with a master's and not finishing the PhD) and just getting a 9-5 job. But I don't know how I can work a job like that anymore. Since I've been diagnosed I've dealt with crippling depression and hypo/manic and mixed episodes that sometimes included psychosis. I've needed to take a lot of leave. Now I'm sufficiently medicated for mania but my depression lingers. In my PhD program I have a lot of flexibility in my schedule although I find the program very stressful. The stress is so much I want to run far away from academia and anything resembling it. I've been looking at jobs that I'm qualified for and they all seem to be 9-5 type jobs. Anyone here working a job like that and doing alright with it?

I just sleep to get each day over with. I sleep so much and I'm still tired. I don't want to do anything and there is little pleasure in my life. My hobbies and interests are no longer enjoyable to me. I'm medication compliant and it's still not enough to keep me from feeling like this. I go to therapy and haven't improved, although I think part of that is my therapist is a poor fit for me so I'm starting to see a new one. At least this depression is milder than in the past but it's relentless. It's been years of this on and off.

It doesn't feel like I'm living.

I've been in therapy for a couple years now and I haven't really gotten better. I see signs that my therapist isn't the best (not really asking me questions or challenging me, falling asleep and checking texts during session sometimes, giving me bad advice at times) but he also is decent in other ways, like he has given me some tools to help me with time management that have worked for me. He also takes a lot of vacation. By a lot, I mean probably two months out of the year cumulatively.

The lack of progress has been kind of pissing me off lately, mostly because I don't think my therapist is present in session half the time. It feels like I'm paying just to vent to someone about my week. A lot of the time I talk and he just sits in silence and stares at me. Is this typical in therapy? Is he giving me space to talk more or just not listening enough to follow up? I don't know. I don't like that he doesn't offer many insights or help me dig deeper. I had been blaming myself for not getting better but now I'm thinking I just have been seeing a bad therapist. My mental health has been really suffering.

Has anyone else had a similar experience with a therapist? I've already started seeing a new therapist who seems much more present and will tell my old therapist that I don't want to see him anymore (he's on extended leave right now) but I wanted to vent and see if anyone else has been through something similar.

I'm a third year STEM PhD student in the US. I'm wondering if research and academia is the wrong path for me. I failed my qual the first time I took it. I don't like the day-to-day activities that my field entails (a lot of coding) and I don't like reading papers and also have a hard time writing papers and proposals. I published a paper this year and I've been on the verge of a mental breakdown because I'm worried I've made some sort of retraction-level error. I can't stop obsessing about it, mainly because I'm worried about hurting my co-authors' careers. If this is what a career in research is going to be like, I don't think I'd like to continue. But on the other hand, I just have two years left and it may open up doors to more jobs in the future. I've already put in so much time and effort I'm worried I'll regret it if I leave. How do you know when it's time to give up?

Every time I read a paper I am so bored. I can't tell if this is just what it's like or maybe I'm on the wrong path. Is anyone not bored when reading papers? Or is anyone fully fascinated sometimes? This issue is starting to hinder my research and I'm not sure what to do about it.

My therapist is currently on parental leave and after some reflection I have decided to not move forward with him when he returns. He's an okay therapist but he doesn't always seem present in our sessions, including looking at his Apple Watch throughout the session and even falling asleep briefly sometimes. He also doesn't really ask me follow up questions. The sessions end up feeling like I'm just venting to a friend or something, and not even like that because my friends usually pay attention to everything I'm saying and ask me questions if I'm needing support. After two years I haven't seen much improvement in the issues I went to him for. For these reasons I think it's time I move on. How did you go about notifying your therapist that you would be switching? Did you end it in session or send an email? I'm thinking of sending an email but after two years I'm wondering if that's inappropriate.

I published a paper a couple months ago (my first lead author paper of my PhD) and after acceptance I found several mistakes in the code for the analysis. I managed to correct them but the paper did have to go out for review again. However, there are still some results that are suspicious to me, although my co-authors think everything looks okay. Because coding is so finicky I keep thinking I made some tiny mistake in the code that threw everything off and is a retraction-level error. I've gone back and checked many times and everything has turned out okay, but then I find other things to worry about that I didn't check. It's a torturous cycle. I have to use some of the same code for my next paper and I have panic attacks while working because I worry I'll find something wrong again. Has anyone experienced something similar? How do I let this go?

Edit: I also want to add that I haven't done my dissertation proposal yet and I will have to use the figures from my paper in my proposal. It's not until the fall but I'm freaking out about that too.