r/PhD

I am nearing the end of my PhD and I have mixed emotions. My journey hasn’t been easy at all. Issues with supervision, writing and cliques. Made me think if I were to go back in time would I do the phd or not.. so thought to hear (read) your experiences and what you think of your journey?

Husband is in his final year of his PhD (humanities). During his PhD, we had 2 kids and I’ve taken on most of the mental load in our family to give him space to work. He does a pretty good job with chores and he’s an involved parent, but he works at least half of every weekend and every night after the kids go to bed. He’s an extremely hard worker and created extra opportunities for himself (related to his program) for which he was paid extra, which has been very helpful. He did this in part to try to get a job here, where we’re close to my family. I’m so grateful for that, but now it looks like that opportunity won’t pan out (thanks Trump administration).

My problem is that I’m just done with it all. I’m tired of carrying the mental load myself. I’m tired of making excuses to my friends and family for why he’s not there. I gather that this isn’t unusual, but his program is toxic, and I’m tired of hearing about it. He keeps asking me to read parts of his dissertation, and I don’t want to. I don’t have the time or energy, and maybe also I just resent it. He is talented and he’s achieved amazing things, while also trying to create job opportunities that make sense for our family. But I don’t have it in me to care about this venture anymore. I’m tired.

He just found out his dissertation is due in December (long story), so the next couple months will be a major push and he will need more support. It’s going to absolutely suck.

I don’t know that there’s any advice to give, but I’m open to it if anyone has some. Or perhaps someone has a PhD-insider perspective that can help me find some empathy again. Mostly I just needed to cry out into the void, because I don’t want to stress him even more right now.

Edit: I wasn’t sure if this was the right forum to post in, but I’m so glad I did. Thank you for all the helpful advice, stories and perspectIves—it’s given me lots to think about and some things to do right now to make it a bit better.

Everyone says a PhD is the worst financial decision you can make. As a current PhD student or PhD graduate, what is your experience? How bad is it really ? Did you find a job ?

I’m especially interested in those who did a PhD in agriculture or biological and physics related fields. And if your PhD is interdisciplinary like mine is, I’m even more interested !

Let me know your experience with the current living crisis. I want to know how to prepare for life after PhD.

1.) My advisor asked me to complete a task, which I did. We went over it together and she told me she was “very pleased”. The next week she asked where the task was and I told her we went over it the week prior, she told me that I misunderstood, that’s not what she wanted, and that I need to stop falling behind.

2.) She gave me another task to do and told me to follow up with an email to explicitly state what the task was to ensure I understood . I did. I came back with the task completed and before I showed her she said “you never sent me an email…”. I showed her that I did, she even replied to it, and the task was completed.

3.) She has made jokes about my disorganization in front of my peers.

4.) In an annual student review she flagged me as falling behind and being disorganized. This has hurt my perception in the department and I have now learned that if I get a similar review again, I could be terminated from my program.

5.) The other student that she advises has pulled me aside twice now, asking “is ‘advisor’ okay?”. They don’t really expand on why they keep asking me this, it just seems like something is going on.

6.) I worked on a research project for her that she then wanted me to present to my cohort, expressing she was excited about it. When I presented it to my cohort, she expressed that she thought my results were uninspiring and not sound, and used the presentation as a launch board to ask my peers to join the project. This has also hurt my social standing. I later found out she asked one of my cohort members to reach out to me and tell me good job.

I’m just confused.

hello i’m doing my masters in sydney (comp science with specialization in data science and ai) i will finish my masters in december 2027. and i was thinking about doing phd in germany. is it hard to get into a good phd program in germany in my field and i am interested in researching about how ai is thinking for us and how bad we are getting dependent on ai and another topic im interested is ai tutoring like using ai to understand/ learn concepts because i am a student and i use it to learn programming.
none of my friends have done a phd and idk anyone who’s done it. is germany a good option ? thank you

I'm headed to a conference soon and am planning to make some fun t-shirts to wear while I'm there. Tonight it popped into my head that there could be some really great "that's what your mom said" jokes. I'm looking for funny/silly ones that are just plain silly and don't denigrate moms (because F*** patriarchy and violence against women).

Best joke will go on a T-shirt I will actually wear at conferences and I'll be happy to make and send you one for yourself.

I only have a couple examples but I know y'all could do better.

Your farts have a <.02 p-value, (Mom, Y. 2025).

More research IS needed (Mom, Y. 2025).

"Lets get interdisciplinary!" (Mom, Y. 2025)

My body of evidence is qualitative (Mom, Y. 2025)

What else? Let's have a few laughs shall we?

It's been more than a year and I don't see my research going anywhere. I don't see any upcoming publication. I'm really upset at this moment and I want to at least have one publication through this year.

Do you have any remarks to make on how I approach this

This may be just a bit unrelated.

Just a couple of months ago I was 100% sure that 2026 will be my last year. I was depressed (am still) and sucidal (am not currently). I was sure I was going to off myself and I already had a plan.

I've only recently started my PhD after being depressed for months, an year maybe. Moved to a different country for it. One of things I thought of before deciding to take this position on was "if you don't do this it is the end." This PhD opportunity wasn't the best and I know that I'll have academic barriers to face but this was the only thing that helped me see a future for myself.

Its not the best PhD opportunity. And I know I could do much better (better department, better scholarship) but I was desperate to take this role on to have a purpose.

I just wanted to put this out here because I have no one to talk to about this and just needed to say that I've been dealing with a lot. Sorry if it isn't exactly about my PhD.

AI in 2026 is powerful and will only get 1000x better in the next decade. If you were someone who did your PhD 10 or 15 years ago, do you regret it when you see how powerful AI is? If you regret, why?

Which of the above two kinds of students do you think are better prepared for a PhD? Those who know exactly what they want, or those who are flexible?

Second, what reason do they have to want "exactly" what they want....I mean, for some, it's family history of disease that motivates them...but for the rest, there is no reason to have a burning desire to answer a specific type of question- is that right? Thank you to all for responding.

I am asking specifically for Bioscience PhD in USA. It would be nice if you mention if you are a PhD student/postdoc/professor. Thanks!

Looking for genuine feedback:

I’m in my mid-30s and currently a Senior Manager in cyber defense. My background is mostly in incident response, threat hunting, SecOps, and defensive operations.

The longer I've been in this field, the more interested I’ve become in the research side. I’m especially interested in adversary behavior: how attackers make decisions, how their behavior changes during an intrusion, and how we can use that understanding to improve threat intelligence, detections, and defensive programs.

I don’t want to leave industry right now. I actually love the work I do. I just want to go deeper and eventually contribute research to the field, rather than only consuming it. Additionally, I would also love to develop cirriculum/ teach a course or two, and maybe pivot further into academia when the time is right.

A PhD has been a goal of mine for a long time, but I’m at a stage where leaving my career and life for a full-time residential program isn't possible with a house and heavy financial responsibilities. That has me looking at part-time, hybrid, low-residency, and online cybersecurity PhD programs.

And this is where I’m stuck.

I keep seeing people completely dismiss online or low-residency PhDs, and it’s honestly making me question whether there is any realistic path for someone in my position and if I should just give up on this dream.

I’m not looking for an easy degree or a credential. I want real research training, good mentorship, a serious dissertation, and hopefully publications. I just need a format that allows me to keep working.

Has anyone here actually done this while already established in cybersecurity or tech? Did the PhD format affect how seriously your research or degree was taken?

I’d really appreciate hearing from people who have been in a similar position. Thank you.

Current Ed stack:
- A.S. Cybersecurity
- B.S. in CompSci
- M.S. in Information Security

So, as somebody who just finished their PhD (yay), I'v been thinking about something that bugged me my whole study, and is bugging me still. Motivation vs deadlines... As an example, advisor deadlines and submission dates tend to hold, but the in-between ones (finish the lit review section by Friday, send the draft...) slide constantly because nothing happens when you miss them. Plus my supervisor did not give a damn majority fo time, so I could ignore even some of the major deadlines for days or weeks, before any consequences.

What do you use? A writing group, a check-in with your advisor, locked calendar blocks, anything else that actually works?

Hi all,

I know there are a lot of posts here about burnout. I’m wondering if anyone has gentle advice or encouragement for an ABD who is a few weeks shy of being done a draft. I’m at an R1 university. I don’t work in a lab. I have publications and stuff under review and they’re all solo-authored. I have a great committee but have, for the most part, probably made my PhD journey more difficult by not relying on them as much as I should have and choosing to figure things out alone a lot of the time.

I’ve heard people say the longer they’re in a PhD the “dumber they feel.” I can relate. I’ve found that the closer I get to finishing, the more I have trouble thinking. I’m so tired. I just want to be in a dark room with my eyes closed most of the time.

In the middle of the dissertation, I began using Claude when I ran into coding difficulties and even my brilliant quant colleague couldn’t help me. I didn’t think it was a huge deal. I would get the code, read up on where I was going wrong, and actually felt like I was learning something because I was seeing in real time where I was going wrong and how to fix it and why. Okay, fine.

Months on, though, I’ve found it’s easy to get AI to mull over the structure of something (a chapter, a paragraph) when I feel stuck. I’m not like, hallucinating references or putting in a sentence and asking it to construct a chapter for me or anything like that. I just have these moments where I’m trucking along and I hit a wall and I have these terribly garbled thoughts about what goes where (ie, should this section go before or after that section?) and I just plop it into Claude and feel relieved when I don’t need to puzzle angrily through a roadblock with no cognitive energy. Sometimes I look at the output and fully disagree and just go, okay, well, back to the drawing board then.

Because I’ve noticed that it’s something I’ve come to rely on, I’ve been intentional about limiting my use. But, the desire to offload cognitive tasks is strong when there’s such intense burnout. Now, I have this vague fear someone is going to “catch me” for using AI to work through hiccups in my code, or help me organize my thoughts for longer empirical chapters, or proofread passages. And, not, to rag on my colleagues but I’m also surrounded by extremely productive young adults who have no qualms about talking about how many stimulants (we’re talking pills, not lattes) they’re on. Sometimes I feel like I’m behind because I’m not on drugs. Sometimes I wonder if I could push off the burnout just a little longer by trading my dopamine for short term gain.

Does anyone have any advice? I’m sorry this is scattered. Anyone found they have had to break an “AI habit” due to burnout? Anyone ever feel like everyone around them is snorting adderall in the TA lounge while they’re just trying to make do with a coffee? Has anyone found a routine that helped burnout and cognition during the last stages of the dissertation? I feel awful :(

Edit: I’m in the Midwest and in the social sciences.

Trying to do some independent preliminary research stuff and don't want to commit to paying Rayaan...

Hey everyone,

I am starting a PhD in chemical engineering and I wonder how people are doing after a PhD (especially financially). Has it made any difference doing a PhD instead of going to the industry after a master’s? Has it helped in any way? I see a lot of different opinions but I want to know how people in Europe with a PhD in ChemE/ chemistry have chosen their career path and how they’re doing financially.

Thankyou all!

Edit: PhD will be done in Germany but I am open to enter any industry in Europe.

Hi!

I'm trying to start a Discord server for CS PhD students or researchers in the field. The goal is to enable academic interactions while playing games or similar.

This would be a closed-ish community (involving a researcher status verification) and centered around learning/discussing while engaging in hobbies. This is in contrast to communities solely focused on networking, mentoring, hackathons, etc.

Not sure if this will work but DM me if interested!

Edit:

I may not be getting messages on Reddit. Contact me on Discord, my ID is wapencio.

Hello everyone! <3 As the title says, I’m looking for something advice. It’s a sort of a mix between personal and academic. I sincerely apologize that this is so long, but advice would be much appreciated..

I just started my PhD this semester and am regretting all of it…

I have started a PhD in geology (paleontology specifically) in the USA for clarification*

For context, I originally started my undergrad in a different major, then switched into geology which I got my BS in. My first major was something I was attempting to do for everyone else and therefore was hating it and struggling. The switch was something I had finally did for myself, and was the best decision. I was not in a good place mentally before hand, and I wouldn’t still be around today if it weren’t for Geology.

I always had a love for science, and immediately believed that I wanted to being an academic professor and researcher as my end goal. But I was skeptical in the final year on if I should go straight into grad school. I was worried I’d be burnt out from doing only school my entire life without rest, and also knew it is a massive step to take.

I’d met my now advisor at a conference where I was presenting and we hit it off extremely well. I’d mentioned to him some reservations I had of jumping straight to PhD from undergrad and that I wanted to do the MS first for just in case (in case bad match, burn out, or any other sort of issue that I’ve heard many have faced while in a PhD). He was just fine with that and it worked out great because he didn’t have the funds for a PhD student. We had discussed my MS, fully planned out my thesis and every aspect.

Then suddenly, around a month before applications were due, things had changed. He had funding for a PhD student, and it was a near grantee that I’d be accepted as if the school didn’t accept me as a GTA, he would have the funds to hire me as a GRA for the first year or so. He told me this, and that I was his top choice to have this offer. We reassured me things wouldn’t change in the difficulty department for the first two years, and that he would treat me as he does any other MS student, just that I’d have more chapters to my thesis and need to stay a few extra years sort of thing.

I had 24 hours to decide.

Everyone pushed for me to do the PhD, and so.. I did. I applied as a PhD student. I received an invite to view the campus, have a 1-1 meeting with my now advisor, and meet my lab group. When I visited the lab group was wonderful, everything seemed absolutely perfect. I could see myself fitting in, and was exited to also have friendly faces and friends already here as soon as I started. Less than a week later I got accepted as a GTA, and am now in my first semester.

And this semester has been hell already..

3/4 of my lab mates seem to avoid me like the plague and only will great me with simple ‘hello, how are you, I’m fine’ and then more or less ignore me when I talk. They avoid me like the plague. I have no idea what I did wrong, they had seemed so different when I visited in the spring. The other person is wonderful, and we seem to get along well but we also are only really able to interact 1 day out of the week when we have the mandatory guest speaker talk.

I’m also struggling in my classes. In undergrad I specifically would take fewer classes and instead take mini-semester courses so that I wouldn’t overwork myself. I have fewer classes than I did in undergrad even still, but it’s too much. I’m technically already failing a class and will need to work my butt off more than I already am in order to pass. I’m currently putting in around 12 hours each day Monday-Friday, and ~6-8 hours over the weekend for TAing, research prep, and classes/studying. I don’t know how I could physically put in more hours. And I know these numbers are high. I struggle with dyslexia, adhd, and autism, so learning is slow for me. I on average need to do 2x time studying and prep to learn something compared to most anyone else I know.

In addition to that, I’m the furthest I’ve ever been from my family. My ESA/soul pet is back home with my parents and this Friday ended up needing to go to the vet. He is getting old, loosing his sight, hearing, mobility, and now memories. I can’t go home till thanksgiving, and even then it’s iffy with how I’m doing in my classes. I never can get anything done when I visit home.

Also: my advisor was doing field for the first month as well so he only got back recently, and when we had our first 1-1 meeting with me as his student, 50% of my PhD thesis had changed, he already had chosen my committee, and was saying the entire time that my PhD is for me to shape and ultimately I have a choice in my Chapters, but he disregarded everything I had to mention. I feel most of this is because he was seriously jet lagged and had only gotten back in town the day prior, but thought I’d mention it..

For the past 2-3 weeks now, I’ve been seriously considering if a PhD is right for me. I’m burnt out, not sleeping or eating, having constant anxiety and panic attack. I feel isolated and can’t figure out how to fix it. My ultimate goal hasn’t changed though, I still want to become a professor and teach, I love being a TA so far. But at the same time, every day im becoming more scared about my emotional and physical health, like might need a 72 hour hold soon sort of scared...

I am attempting to set up a therapist. But finding someone has been tough so far.

I don’t want to be here. I don’t know if I can do 4-5 years of this. I knew I wasn’t ready, and now I don’t know what to do.

If I quit, am I ever able to start a new PhD? I’m also scared I won’t find another advisor that has a research lab that can help me with my research questions. I’m also feel like quitting (especially so early into it) means I’ve failed. I’ll have failed my family, my mentors, my advisor, myself. And I oriented my BS in a way where I don’t know nearly enough to go into another field of geology. I specifically took classes that were intended to help with my field, a field where nothing can be done without a masters at least. There is also the aspect where I have rent and can’t end a lease, and to pay rent I need to still be a GTA. And I don’t even know how to begin the process to quit…

Thanksgiving can’t come soon enough..

I’m to a point where it is either I quit, or I somehow convince my parents to move closer. But I don’t think I can ask that of them.. they finally have made friends since moving 6 years ago, and have finally started placing roots down.

Anyways, I do apologize for how long this is and will greatly appreciate any advice, any thoughts, or if you’ve experienced something similar, how you handled it.

Does anyone else have a super long winter break? I'm a first year PhD student and I'm realizing that my university's winter break is almost 6 weeks long, during which time PhD students don't receive stipend payments. I've heard breaks at some point in the summer are also common.

How do other PhD students deal with this? The job market is already so bad but idk how I'd get a job for 6 weeks or less. My university is also in a fairly small town so I'm guessing jobs are limited.

For those with a PhD in psychology outside of clinical psychology: What do you do for work, and how are you earning income? I’d love to hear actual job titles, career paths, and how you got there.
I have a PhD in psychology(cognition/instruction,quantitative focus) and run a private practice under my master’s-level therapist license. I also teach as an adjunct, but neither role requires my doctorate. I’m having a hard time finding work where my PhD meaningfully changes the opportunities available to me—or my earning potential.
I enjoy research, analysis, and learning, but honestly, the degree is starting to feel like a colossal waste of money. I want to hear from people who have found a way to make it work.
Are you in industry research, UX, consulting, program evaluation, academia, or something I haven’t considered? Did your PhD open doors, or did you have to build an entirely different skill set to get hired?
If you’re comfortable sharing, what’s your income range, and would you choose this degree again?
Where are the jobs that make you think, “Okay, this is what I earned this PhD for”?