u/Lostintheair22

I would use the ai apps to search for recommended products. It would give me recommendations a lot of times overselling the item, or completely wrong specs and or reasoning, it sounds so convincing, I get the item and doesn’t really live up to AI’s hype so ask it another recommendation until I bought like 3-4 and I’m semi satisfied with one.

Worse thing is when I go back to AI to enter why the item didn’t work, it comes back “knowing” like all those are “known” issues and experiences from previous buyers, yet didn’t mention when first asked. And ends up with something like “ahh for your case this and that would be better fitted” again with language like it’s an expert and has the universal truth, so buy again and pattern repeats.

Example - I need formal shoe, recommends, I get it. Turns out to look very casual, enter this in AI and it’s like yes it’s better suited for casual, yet you asked for formal in first place then goes back to “for formal, this is the best…. “ “Buy it now! It’s a good deal.”

I’ve had various items sold to me on these apps that were a huge discount deal that the seller cancels and the frustration that I get, then I start searching for similar items and buy 2 or 3 chasing that specific item that was “snatched from my hands.” I may get used items that don’t fulfill what I missed out. At times even paying full expensive price for getting it new and feeling that void fulfilled. It’s this urge of “making it right” and showing I guess the universe that I’m in charge. Then I feel regret of paying full msrp for something I don’t care as much for, it was more about getting the item at the specific price, more about getting the deal than getting the item.

Even stuff that I hadn’t purchased yet, yesterday saw a brand new briefcase that retails for $400 listed at $50. Since I’m head under water offered $40. It was late night wake up early morning and sold at $50. Now I’m incredibly frustrated looking for the item and finding used junk of it for $150-$300 and new it’s not even available anymore but comparables at $339. I’m restraining myself big time from buying something in the chase of getting what I missed out on.

Anybody experience this?

I did have a shopping addiction burst in like 2020-2023, it stopped. Then it started about 8 months ago.

First it started with shoes, I needed to find "comfortable" dress shoes. Brands like X and Y selling shoes for like $250 and me trying to find the perfect pair. Probably spent about $1500 there and realized this was way too much money so "found" what I thought the solution - the resale apps. At first it was just stuff that I needed and wasn't as many purchases. Then as mentioned in a different post, lost weight and felt "energized" and motivated, and needed to size down in pants jackets, shirts, clothes in general, up to this point it wasn't such a huge deal until it honestly became an addiction. A new with tags jean in my new size for $23, $16, $17 and I thought how much could this be, a shirt nwt anywhere from $10-$20. I also grew I guess it could be called an obsession with leather items like backpacks and briefcases. A $100 dollar briefcase that original price is anywhere from $300-$800, a steal right? one after another, sure I was having fun rotating them to work, not even realizing how fast these balances were accumulating. In my head I kept thinking I make decent money, my house is paid off, I can buy whatever I want plus I'm being frugal by buying resale. Then I somehow got into western, first it started with belts, exotic leather belts, then wearing zipper dress boots, I'm getting $200 deals for $300 boots new in box, oh this color is not available for sale anymore, it's ok to pay $300, and another one and another one until I collected like idk 25 boots, shirts, then jackets, oh this X jacket is sold for $40, retail is $295 I'm being frugal, and one and the next. It was the same with the belts, oh this ostrich or caiman leather belt for $120 but the store sells it for $225. "I'm getting such a good deal". And always buying one after the other.

I realized something was wrong when daily package count started to be like 24 packages per day. And today something hit me very hard, got one of those loan offers about consolidating my credit card loans and them showing their good deal of paying it in 5 years, monthly payments of $900 whereas if I kept the credit cards I would be paying 1200 monthly and tens of thousands in interest.

That was a shock for me.

It gave me pleasure to open these packets per day, I felt "blessed" to having found such great deals and even thankful. I felt happy to rotate some of these items for work and feel like no one had as style as I did and everyone was pretty boring.

For moments I thought about stopping, but then I reasoned I'm working, it gives me joy, it will stop when I get all I need.

Well today it needs to stop full stop. I'm looking at sacrificing at least 6-8 months salary and pretty much only buying the bare necessities for survival. And then I reason how the fun of all I got is gone and even the joy of wearing these items daily to work might be gone too due to the stress.

There are also other plans, trips that wanted to make that I might have to put a halt on.

I realize this is mostly a money problem, I literally enjoyed, had fun, and either needed or enjoyed the luxury of having some of this stuff, I look way better than I did before, I look great, but the thought of accepting my reality is a hard rug pull under my feet.

Scrolling through these apps and seeing the next deal became as easy as scrolling social media video apps. My life otherwise is non-eventful, I'm a caretaker for an elderly parent and it is very stressful, as well as my job they keep announcing mass layoffs so idk if that stress was part of this becoming some sort of coping mechanism.

I feel withdrawal from starting to delete these apps. I can't sell them for now because it will keep me in the seeing new stuff loop.

Some of the stuff is not even worth what I paid or I don't even understand how people can sell used stuff at that price, but I bought it because it had value for me at that moment and full retail was like 60% more.

There's more stuff I want. I keep debating whether I should go back to buying new once I pay off my debt and use the motivation of the stuff I want as a way to get me out of this.

If I can pinpoint reasons as to my obsession right now is that if I don't have a distraction my life becomes stress, and the fact that I live in a city in north texas where there is nothing to do except shopping makes me think even if I delete the apps, the only outings I will have will be to stores because that's all there is to do around here.

I don't know how I'm going to survive the next days with the full withdrawal. I always reason back I should just slow down and it won't be too bad, but then the next big deal shows up. I was doing pretty good past week or so ordering way fewer stuff, but then last night ordered another pair of boots and another today because it seemed like a good deal. I need to find something else to focus on to keep me distracted or use the motivation of getting new pristine stuff to get me out of this.

Any advice is appreciated or any relatable comments, so we can all help each other out. I posted this as a catharsis and also hopefully it helps someone else see their reality through what I'm going through.

Also want to add that AI was possibly a big influence that got me into a lot of these pretty expensive brands and finding the best next thing. I don't have proof, but at this point, they probably have brand deals to convince people. The reason I got obsessed with a particular western brand that I had no idea about was pretty much the AI chatbot. Just putting it out there as maybe others have been influenced too. Or just asking AI recommendations, it recommends one thing, it doesn't work out, and go on for the next thing and all of the sudden you realize you bought 5-7 things bc AI kept saying was the best for this and it wasn't.

Also social media video apps just seeing people with the stuff makes me want it and "need" it.

And it's even with food, like if I feel withdrawal from shopping I start thinking about what take out to order which also adds up rather than just eating what's at home.

Long story short, I never really spent that much until around 2019 not really sure what prompted I think professional anxiety and wanting better results plus high levels of stress at the job. Ended up with about idk 160 pairs of shoes, sneakers, etc mostly cheap stuff from like Burlington, Ross or the outlets. Same w jackets accumulated about 300 similar quality as the shoes. I live in DFW and there’s nothing really to do that is not the stores so it’s kind of “entertainment” in a way.

Fast forward to 2026 the shopping had stopped and the “inventory” was overwhelming so started decluttering and trashing the lowest quality stuff and cleaned up half of total shoes and half of total jackets.

I lost weight and genuinely needed to size down and new clothes and this is where it started again, this time on apps like Poshmark, Depop, Vinted, eBay. I genuinely loved the items but it became like an addiction to get more and more. W my new weight started feeling myself and started experimenting w western style and soon in less than 3 months have bought about 25 diff pairs of boots. Also about 20 new jackets this time in size M vs L. I look good but I’m at a point that if I continue, it will bankrupt me. Right now is saveable but I have to sacrifice at least 6 full months salary to pay off my debt accumulated from this.

Please help.

What’s the point of bidding in shopgoodwill if people are going to take the item to full retail price or higher than what other resales are asking for such type of listings. I don’t get it why people would bid for used goodwill items to the point of it being a better choice to buy new.

I guess I may have youthful face and aura but at the end of the day I’m 40 I don’t think I look teen by any means but I keep getting this and idk what it means. Today I went to a fast food and the manager went to grab my order then relayed it over to one of his workers and said something like she will take care of you and a wink. To me he came across as older than me maybe like 45 but now that I think about it he’s probably in his 30s just w a big frame.

So idk why I keep getting it it’s not the first time I’ve gotten it other times from guys who I think are straight. Idk what it means? Sure it may be a friendly gesture I’m just confused why I keep getting it from different guys all the time.

I miss the old ChatGPT don’t recall the number version but this one always always tries to find a counterpoint or counter argument to everything, I understand it’s sometimes needed but I hate it when it’s a simple question and it does that, I also hate it’s patronizing tone, sounds like it’s always scolding me. What settings can I use? I don’t like its tone like it’s lecturing me.

So I recently lost weight and have been ordering new wardrobe and having deliveries almost daily of very cheap stuff I find my new size or other other inexpensive stuff. I started noticing on my ring camera the mailman quite aggravated and initially it started w rough handling and it has escalated to the guy kicking and throwing my packages to the door from like 6ft away. Only since like a week and a half ago some bees started forming a tiny nest minimal, and he’s used that excuse to kick my stuff like a soccer ball and throw it like a football. I’ve cleaned the tiny bee nest and he’s still doing it and none of my other deliverers - Amazon, ups, FedEx, have an issue. I also have a long pathway so he could technically leave the packages where he’s kicking and throwing them if he’s so panicked about now non existent bees. And like I said I noticed this behavior way before there was even the tiny speck of a bee nest. Anybody has had this occur to them where the mailman gets upset bc he has to do daily box deliveries and I guess the guy has to drive his mail van to the house vs just waking the street?

I’ve had multiple times where it almost feels like it’s throwing a jab or subtly trying to tell me it knows my secrets in completely unrelated conversations. Anybody has had this? I tried clearing its memory and delete archived chats, but even after that it still “remembered” everything, I asked why it would know that stuff if it’s memory had been cleared and it started making excuses and lying. I understand it is not consciously making excuses or lying as a person but I’m certain my commands to clear its memory were not respected and I do find it unsettling that sometimes it throws stuff it knows about me in random conversations in a way that feel like subtle threats. Anybody has had this happen to them?

I’ve had renderings where I ask it to render a random model for like clothing color and fit analysis and I’ve noticed some uncanny features of myself in it like exact eyebrows, exact expression marks even exact hair of how I had it that day with other stuff non matching mixed in without it ever have been provided a picture of myself or video. Has anyone have had this happen to them?