u/NovelRazzmatazz8111

My therapist seems to be dismissing B’s feelings whenever I have a session with her and everytime I want to talk to her about B’s (male altar protector) body dysphoria or gender dysphoria she always starts to ask about other questions to change the subject and it seems like she keeps dismissing his feelings like their not important
I started low dose HRT and my therapist seemed kinda upset about it and I told her that I was very ok with being gender fluid and slowly transition I want to help make my altars happy and feel comfortable in this body doing that makes me happy as well. like she’s trying to tell me that I shouldn’t help B with this and that he needs to accept that the body is female and that i shouldn’t let him mutilate my body. But it’s not only my body and I feel like maybe I should find another therapist idk if anyone else has had an experience like this and why would she be telling me these things?

I had a therapy session yesterday and it made me realize how fucked up my life is😔 since childhood. Like damn how am I still even here? Why am I still even here? There’s nothing for me no more my life is over but yet I’m still somewhat here? I’m nothing but misery trauma pain sadness and depression it’s all I am.

Hi this is something that happens often and for as long as I can remember and it’s just made me kinda break down rn😭 there’s a new neighbor where I live and she knocked on my door and said I left something outside and I told her thank you and sorry I haven’t met her and introduced myself and she said that she knocked on my door earlier and that I spoke to her already and when she told me that it just broke me in the inside I felt so bad😭 this happens so often and it makes me feel so bad
I don’t even know who I am right now.
I’ve struggled like this for so long
the same thing has happened with my bus driver and even family and friends the other day my mom said that while I was on the phone that I didn’t even remember that I had a sister I just feel so bad I’m sorry😭

I wish my family was supportive like other families Ive heard about. I don’t tell my family or siblings about all my diagnosis and disorders because

1. They wouldn’t believe me.
2. They think doctors label people for money.
3. They would think I’m faking for attention
4. My dad always says we’ve known you your whole life there’s nothing wrong with you
5. They will say you weren’t like that before your just faking and your fine
   I struggle everyday with these disorders I’m in therapy for for these disorders and that still wouldn’t be enough for them to believe me

Weird question I just had an episode of sleep paralysis today it’s a terrifying experience but I get episodes often I’m also diagnosed DID. but what if I’m an altar that woke up and the host was still asleep that’s why I couldn’t wake up the body from the host’s dream?

Hi it is (A) I’ve been seeing a therapist regularly she’s been asking some questions and wants me to talk about some past trauma that is very hard for me to talk about. I noticed that I kept getting thoughts and memories blocked and started getting really bad anxiety and heart racing. I noticed that my therapist also kept trying to force/trigger a certain altar to front and I know who (B) because she’s read his notes. After therapy I had anxiety because of what she wanted me to try to remember and talk about (past trauma) and I noticed that my altars now don’t feel safe and a little afraid of her and therapy now. I feel like therapy might be doing more harm than good and also is it harmful if she’s trying to force/trigger an altar to front?

B always takes over with phone calls because he already knows I (A) will overshare things I’m not supposed to say it has happened before and then B has to fix everything that’s why he does the talking with phone calls to keep us safe but this time he let me talk to my mom on the phone and I know he was listening just in case but I was the one actually speaking to her this time and it felt so good to connect again with her and talk about memories and things I actually had feelings and emotions memories with. What I mean is like when B answers the phone and does the talking he’s very apathetic and can’t remember certain memories like if a family member or friend says remember when we baked cookies together he would say something like “Yep” or if they ask why I don’t remember something like a birthday he will say something like “I didn’t forget about it just been busy” but honestly he has no memory of it no connection feelings or emotions to the memory or person family or friend. It’s hard to explain but I tried my best to explain it. It’s sometimes hard especially when you have emotions feelings memories with others like family and friends and they wonder why you seemed different or detached or don’t remember certain things

Years ago when I still had life in me and the days were still beautiful . I never knew what real love was or what falling in love was until I met this guy (now ex) that made me comfortable and was ok with me being quiet and shy he always made me laugh and we always had fun wherever we went
It was the first time I ever felt feelings for someone and I had never dated anyone before. we hung out all the time talked all night till we fell asleep bought each other gifts. Then he just got distant and said one day it’s best if we stay as friends for now and that ended it.
he texted me that. I accepted staying as friends but never saw him again after that day. I remember going to the restroom and crying my eyes out. I cried almost everyday hugging the plushie he had given me. It was the first time I ever felt heartbroken. That day it felt like my heart shattered into a million pieces it’s all just a memory now.

(TW)⚠️

Hi I am A (host) I just started therapy again but there’s a altar (P) that I feel I should maybe not tell my therapist about because he’s depressed and has su*cidal thoughts/feelings and i’m afraid to tell her about him I have found lots of notes from him talking about his sadness and also I know how he is we can also communicate internally with each other he hardly speaks he speaks more through emotions feelings thoughts
he has never acted out on anything su*cidal he just gets those feelings/thoughts but I don’t know how a therapist would
handle and react when they find out a altar is depressed and has those kinds of thoughts and feelings that’s why I am afraid of showing her his notes and telling her more about him i’m just kind of wondering what do therapists do when they meet an altar like that

Hi it’s me A again the host. I just started therapy again and I feel so bad one of my altars has been experiencing gender dysphoria for a long time already we are a system of 7
there’s J (male) M (male) Izzy (male) C (male) B (male)
P (male) and me A (female) I feel so bad because J, Izzy, C and B have gender dysphoria but the one that has it the most severely and it’s been affecting him pretty badly is B
I feel so bad because I don’t know what to do about it
I feel so selfish😭

Quick update hi I am A (host) (female) and the other day I was switched out unexpectedly by B (protector) I can only remember so much of what he said he spoke to me while I was in the innerworld or headspace
(not sure what it’s called) and he was fronting. He said he was upset at me because it’s kinda selfish when I do things and make decisions that put the body at risk of harm or danger and doing things that harm the body (like not eating and not taking care of myself) (putting up with abusive men) he said this is my body too it is our body. I have a life too we have a life. And when you hurt yourself or get in a risky situation your hurting everyone else too (everyone else meaning the other altars) he helped put some things in order and he’s not upset at me no more (he doesn’t stay mad at me for long) I just felt really bad like why can’t I be the one to just disappear or be locked up🫣
but after that talk I’m really trying to do better because he’s right about that stuff😔

It is me A again (host) it seems that even though M helped me delete my BF the other day B my protector is upset at me and not talking to me😭me and him are really close and we have been really close since I was a child and before I even knew what DID was and before I got diagnosed. I know he gets upset at the stupid decisions and things I’ve done in life and he’s always been the one that has to step in to fix everything and my mistakes and I always feel bad it’s my fault again for putting us through what I did the last couple weeks with my now ex. I think B is just finally fed up with me😭

Why do some men say they are very lonely and no one talks to them and they wish they had friends but it’s so hard to make friends as you get older but then you talk to them and become friends so that man is not lonely and then find out he was lying and is talking to several other women and telling them the same thing that he is so lonely and has no friends and nobody to talk to. I just ended a friendship because of that. I like to be friends to those that are really lonely and don’t have friends I’ll be there but not to someone that lies about it. Why do some men do this and wonder if someone has experienced this too

I am A (host) and last night I deleted my BF off my phone. I was having very bad anxiety to the point of having a panic attack because of my BF. And M (male altar) talked me through it and helped me delete my BF. I felt a huge relief after. But then I also felt like what have I done? When I start to miss him and feel like crying I’m reminded by M and B (male protector) why it was the right thing to do and how much harm he was causing me/us. I felt so bad and so weak for putting us through this.
I apologized to everyone (my altars). Im still recovering from all the anxiety and emotional harm my bf was causing me/us.

Hi it’s me Izzy I’m 13 years old male. I’ll make this quick. Our host named A for short (female) always has problems especially when talking to guys. She gets overly emotional at the things they message to her and she gets a lot of anxiety from it. Another alter named M for short (Male) has been in love with host for some time and even tho host says no one else can ever replace M. M feels kinda hurt and jealous now because host has been talking to some guy she met online and this guy has been treating host like she’s just someone he’s messages when he’s bored or his bestys are not around. Host has a good heart but often gets stepped on a lot by people. Our protector named B for short (Male) and I have both agreed to delete the guy’s contact off the phone because B doesn’t like the extreme anxiety host has been getting because this guy

I noticed that my altars depending who’s fronting will talk to my family members or my friends/BF it’s been hard because no one knows I have been diagnosed with DID but when they speak to me they often expect to speak with that same person they know and spoke to.

EDIT: I often don’t remember what they talked about and I have to pretend that I know but then they ask me if I’m feeling ok and I seem different today stuff like that

Hi everyone I was just diagnosed with DID but what if the diagnosis was a mistake. and I’m still learning about it
sometimes I don’t know who I am or who’s fronting I just feel like that’s the real me at the moment and then sometimes I feel like I’m watching someone else take the wheel in my body
(best way I could describe it) I often hear other voices in my head anywhere I’m at for example I’m at the store and I want a cute plushie and a voice in my head says
“you don’t need that you need to save money focus on what your here for” or “you better not waste your money on that”. I have also overshared some things when I’m on the phone with others and then I regret it and a voice in my head will say things like “that’s why I need to step in with stuff like this because your too emotional and I have to protect our peace”
I just wanted to know am I crazy or can an alter be telling me these things? Also would he be considered a protector?

Hi everyone I was just diagnosed with DID but what if the diagnosis was a mistake. and I’m still learning about it
sometimes I don’t know who I am or who’s fronting I just feel like that’s the real me at the moment and then sometimes I feel like I’m watching someone else take the wheel in my body
(best way I could describe it) I often hear other voices in my head anywhere I’m at for example I’m at the store and I want a cute plushie and a voice in my head says
“you don’t need that you need to save money focus on what your here for” or “you better not waste your money on that”. I have also overshared some things when I’m on the phone with others and then I regret it and a voice in my head will say things like “that’s why I need to step in with stuff like this because your too emotional and I have to protect our peace”
I just wanted to know am I crazy or can an alter be telling me these things? Also would he be considered a protector?

Hi im AuDHD and looking for others to talk to and make friends I’m F33 and I’m really obsessed with Carebears, Bluey, Monster high, TMNT, Roblox, Dandy’s world, Anime, Rocks and gemstones and a lot more I like to talk about my day or things I find interesting but don’t have anyone to tell and talk to