u/OkFix126

I've always been attracted to men, particularly older men, so I always assumed I was gay. But recently I've realised that I'm also very attracted to older women, and not just one woman. I've noticed a pretty consistent pattern. Apparently, my type is people in their 40s-60s who look like they have their life figured out. Y'know people that look confident, established and composed, they absolutely do something to me.

Also, I'm not particularly attracted to men or women my own age, even though I would genuinely love to have a relationship with someone my age but it just feels so impossible.

The worst part is I've always wanted affection from older people, regardless of gender. My parents were pretty awful, so naturally I'm wondering whether this is some kind of attachment issue like daddy/mommy issues. But I'm also very independent and don't want older partners for money or some sense of security. My relationships with older people have always felt like they were on equal footing. I've also avoided relationships for a long time and have sabotaged some genuinely good ones.

I sometimes feel weird about the age difference in the opposite direction. When an 18 yo messages me on Grindr, I feel incredibly uncomfortable because they seem so young to me like I feel like a pedo. Yet I'm perfectly comfortable looking for people 15-20 years older than myself.

I am genuinely really confused. It feels like I am giving some sort of power to them. As I've stated earlier, I'd like to think I have my life together, or at least that what it looks from outside, but I am genuinely scared of this whole thing. It feels like I am losing everything I've worked so hard for. Nothing against older people but idk why I feel like that. I don't want to feel like that, I want a partner my age. I don't know what to do.

Does anyone else feel like that?

Any rich guy/gal looking to get rid of their MacBook m2 air 16 gb in 150k? I know it's basically me robbing y'all but a brother really needs a computer for work...

And If this career worked I'll pay y'all back the rest of the amount.

I’m in a bit of a predicament and would really appreciate some advice from people who know about this stuff.

My current system is an i7 4790 (I think), 16GB RAM and an RX 590, and it’s been giving me nonstop problems lately. I’m pretty sure there’s something going on with the motherboard and psu, and at this point I’m wondering if it’s even worth putting more money into this thing. I initially thought I’d just keep the RX 590 and build around it, but now I’m leaning toward scrapping the old system altogether and building a completely new one.

My budget is around 200k PKR. My main use case is productivity, specifically Figma, Photoshop, illustrator and davinci resolve. I do game as well, but gaming isn't really the reason I'm buying the PC. It would just be a nice bonus, I really want to play God of war Ragnarok, my current PC can't really run it and it's sitting dormant in my steam library.

The other option I'm considering is an M2 MacBook Air. The portability is obviously a huge advantage since I currently don't have a laptop, but I'm worried apple won't support it much longer and I'd like to keep it for a few years.

So if you had 200k to spend, what would you personally do? if you would build the PC, what exact components would you choose for. Also, the amd GPUs are priced better but I've heard Nvidia works better for productivity, I am not sure tho.

Thanks!

What if the boy everyone called “gay” was actually a victim?

I’m a straight guy, and I’ll be honest. I’ve always been on the homophobic side of the spectrum. I don’t support LGBT, and I’ve generally believed homosexuality is unnatural and that things like porn or outside influences can play a role.

But recently I remembered something from Class 1 that has genuinely made me rethink how I view gay people.

There was a boy in my class who used to touch the d*** of the boy sitting next to him. This was long before smartphones, Android phones, social media, etc. So it wasn't like he was watching things online and copying what he saw.

Later, that boy developed a reputation because of it, and some other boys took advantage of that reputation.

As an adult, I now look back at that memory completely differently.

What if that child had himself been exposed to sexual behaviour by someone? What if he had been abused? What if something had happened to him that none of us knew about?

He was literally a child.

It also made me wonder about biology, hormones, childhood experiences and how much of someone's sexual behaviour or orientation is actually within their control. I don't know enough about the science to give an answer, and I'm not claiming that childhood abuse causes homosexuality.

But something in my attitude has changed.

I’m still straight. I still don't support LGBT, and I'm not saying I've suddenly changed my beliefs or become an LGBT supporter.

But I find myself feeling sympathy rather than hatred now.

Because if someone genuinely experiences same-sex attraction and didn't choose it, then having to live with those feelings, social stigma, family pressure and religious/moral conflict could genuinely be an incredibly difficult test for that person.

Even if I don't agree with their choices or lifestyle, I don't think that automatically means I have to hate them as a human being.

Maybe I'm completely wrong about some of this, and that's why I'm posting.

Has anyone else ever had a childhood memory that made them rethink their attitude toward homosexuality? And what does science actually say about the relationship between childhood experiences, abuse, biology and sexual orientation?

Any idea where I can get a good mesh ergonomic office chair? The one I have is a hazard to my butt and lower back.

Thank you.

Assalamualaikum everyone, I'd love to get your honest thoughts on an idea I've been working on.

The first part is a platform focused on long-term rentals, not something like Airbnb, but a place where you can find verified homes, apartments, and commercial properties for long-term rent.

The second, and more important part, is a platform built specifically for architects. Architects would be able to create profiles and showcase their completed projects, designs, and portfolios, allowing potential clients to browse their work and contact them directly. If you're planning to build on your own plot, you could compare different architects, explore their previous work, and choose the one that best matches your style and budget.

Individuals would also be able to submit property listings, but every listing would go through a verification process before being published. The goal is to create a trusted platform where every listing is legitimate, reducing the scams and fake listings that are common on some property websites.

I've already designed and built the website, and I'm now trying to figure out whether there's enough demand for something like this and whether it has the potential to become a profitable business.

Would you use a platform like this? What features would make it valuable to you, and what concerns would you have? I'd genuinely appreciate any honest feedback.

Assalamualaikum everyone, I'd love to get your honest thoughts on an idea I've been working on.

The first part is a platform focused on long-term rentals, not something like Airbnb, but a place where you can find verified homes, apartments, and commercial properties for long-term rent.

The second, and more important part, is a platform built specifically for architects. Architects would be able to create profiles and showcase their completed projects, designs, and portfolios, allowing potential clients to browse their work and contact them directly. If you're planning to build on your own plot, you could compare different architects, explore their previous work, and choose the one that best matches your style and budget.

Individuals would also be able to submit property listings, but every listing would go through a verification process before being published. The goal is to create a trusted platform where every listing is legitimate, reducing the scams and fake listings that are common on some property websites.

I've already designed and built the website, and I'm now trying to figure out whether there's enough demand for something like this and whether it has the potential to become a profitable business.

Would you use a platform like this? What features would make it valuable to you, and what concerns would you have? I'd genuinely appreciate any honest feedback.

Aoa.

I have a 2019, wagon r. Until the recent fuel price hikes, I never really paid much attention to its fuel average, but I've started tracking it lately, and honestly, I'm surprised by how poor it is.

I'm getting around 9–10 km per liter in the city, and sometimes even less. On average, 7 liters of petrol gets me only about 60–65 km. Which is surprisingly low for a wagon r?

I don't think my driving style is the issue. I drive fairly sensibly, don't accelerate aggressively, and I'm generally light on the throttle. That's why this fuel consumption seems unusually high to me.

Is this considered normal for a 2019 wagon r in city driving, or is there likely an underlying issue with the car? At this point, fuel has become expensive enough that I'm genuinely considering using a motorcycle for my daily commute.

I'd appreciate any suggestions on what I should get checked.

Edit: could it be the O2 sensor? I got it changed recently.

So my trusty phone finally gave up. So I am in the market for a new phone. I've shortlisted 4 phones.

Pixel Nine

Vivo v seventy8-256

OPPO Reno Fifteen

Samsung a56

All of them are PTA approved. 3 of them are brand new. Pixel has a better camera.

I wanted to inquire about battery life and Network reception. I've heard some horror stories about pixel devices. I am travelling a lot these days so a reliable internet connection and battery life is really important for me. I do like the design of pixel and cameras are obviously great but it's not my main use case..

I'd highly appreciate detailed answers instead of "pixel, great phone," thanks in advance!

Edit: do all these support nfc payments?

I have to tell someone because I am losing my mind over this.

So there are these two guys who live on my street, we're basically neighbors. One is in his early 40s, let's call him John. The other is in his late 30s, we'll call him Adam.

John never married. He still lives with his parents, while all his siblings have moved abroad. Adam got divorced a few years ago, and from what I've heard from my mother, he was never really into the marriage in the first place. He's the youngest in a big joint family.

Now, let me preface this by saying they're both ridiculously, shmockingly hot. John has this whole salt and pepper look going on, and Adam is just so cutie pie and I've had a crush on both of them for years. They're very close friends. Both work, but by the end of the day they're almost always together. Adam is constantly at John's house, and I've seen them out driving together countless times. I never really suspected anything, but I definitely wondered. I mean there are close friends in Pakistan, extremely close ones, so I never really dug deeper.

But about a week ago, I was coming back from a run around 10 or 11 at night. As I walked past their parked car, I saw them touching each other in a way that definitely didn't look platonic. I looked away almost immediately because I didn't want to be a peeping Tom of my neighborhood. Guys, I was internally screaming. I genuinely think they're together.

I'm weirdly happy for them. Also a little jealous because I've been lusting after both of them for years, and meanwhile they've apparently this whole relationship going on. I have this urge to ask them a million questions and somehow become friends with them, even though I know that's never going to happen, Alas!

The only thing that worries me is that they're lucky it was me who happened to notice them and not one of those self righteous, overly religious uncles, especially the corner house one, who would make their lives miserable. If they really are together, I just hope they're careful. I almost wish I could somehow warn them to be safe, but that would probably terrify them more than help.

Also, is it weird that I am monitoring them a lot these days, I am full on fangirling over them, istg. Life has never been this exciting.. but I should probably stop obsessing over them and pray to gay gods that they spend a healthy long life with each other... Or maybe they're just friends and I am overthinking about it.

Assalamualaikum everyone.

I've been a windows user for as long as I can remember. My current machine is still perfectly capable, but the experience has become increasingly exasperating. Every solution invites a new problem, and with Windows 10 nearing the end of its support, I'm not enthusiastic about investing in another windows machine. Maybe It's simply my luck, but I've grown tired. The past few months have involved more trips to repair shops than I can remember, and I'm at a stage where I'd much rather own something dependable. I simply want a machine that does what its supposed to do without acting like a snowflake.

My budget is around 150k–180k. My workflow involves figma, illustrator and photoshop. I did look at Macs, but the pricing left me scratching my head. A six year old macBook air m1 with 8GB ram still going for around 200k which seems difficult to justify. As to why I am gravitating towards macs? I've heard positive things about battery life and the performance under battery. And I'd like to see the world outside while working.

My only real requirement is 16gb of ram. Storage isn't much of a concern since figma is web based and I already use external ssds.

I'd really appreciate the recommendations. Thanks in advance.

Edit: I'd appreciate it if you guys can direct me to someone who isn't charging a significant markup on these devices.

I started losing weight at the beginning of 2025. Back then I weighed 122 kg (269 lbs). Today I'm 82 kg (180 lbs).

Ever since I dropped below 85 kg, people's attitudes toward me have changed in ways I can't ignore. Strangers look at me differently now. They don't make nasty remarks anymore. Some of them even smile and make small talk. My friends changed too. These days they invite me out. Before, they'd go places without me and I'd only find out through Instagram stories,if I found out at all. Sometimes they hid those stories from me. I've cut most of them off now, and apparently that makes me the rude, egotistical friend lol

What hurts the most is my family. Suddenly they take me seriously. Suddenly my opinions seem to matter. It's like I have transferred my former weight into my words

I was obese for most of my life and I didn't even develop much of a personality and always struggled socially, so I convinced myself that was the reason I couldn't make real friends. The weird thing is that I'm still the same shy, introverted guy I've always been, yet people seem to want to talk to me now. Even at the gym, people who barely acknowledged my existence when I first joined suddenly say hello and no it's not just confidence and not because I dress better or I've become more charismatic, I am still the same old me

What bothers me is that every interaction comes with the same question Would this person have treated the old me the same way? That's what makes me angry. Instead of enjoying these interactions they make me resentful. I find myself pulling away from them. I've become even more housebound because I don't want to deal with the constant reminder that the world seems to treat people differently based on how they look. I know the bitterness is probably irrational but it's so overwhelming that they suddenly treat me like a human.