u/Opening-Tea-9745

I didnt exactly know where else to put this but if this doesn’t belong here i will delete it im sorry. What is a permakid? I know what an age regressor is and i am one of those but if a permakid os what people have been telling me. Like you feel mentally permanently in the mindset of a kid. I think i am that. I see the world through a innocent and childlike standpoint and i am very childish. I also have very big emotions. But can you be both? Or am i mistaken. I am confused and it has frustrated me to tears.

For context i live with my grandparents, they do not have much money and neither do i but i will save up and buy what i need, Can i be vegan without getting rid of my new shoes and clothes as long as i dont buy anything new thats from animals or do i have to throw out my clothes and shoes that are used animals because i dont have enough money to buy new ones. I wanna be vegetarian but advoid dairy and eggs or be vegan but not get rid of my clothes. I don’t know what to do or how to label myself i will stop drinking milk and eating eggs! I’ve already stopped eating meat and anything animal, but my aunt yelled at me and said that i cant be vegan because id have to buy all new stuff and to just be vegan when i move out. But i want to help NOW. Do i just be vegetarian and avoid dairy and eggs? What do i do?

I am really into taxidermy and bug pinning as long as it is ethically sourced. But i wanna become vegetarian do i have to stop liking and buying ethically sourced taxidermy and bug pinning?

Edit :

Heres the thing i still live with my grandparents they don’t and i don’t have enough money too go vegan yet. Or atleast what they told me. So i will be vegetarian now and vegan when i move out. Now when i said taxidermy i meant bug taxidermy and bug resin and bug pinning.

Can i still be whimsical if four years ago when i was getting bullied and sent home with bruies and scratches i started bullying with them so they would stop hurting me. All i would do is say mean stuff and bark. But i still feel so guilty even tho they have already forgave me and became friends with me again. I still feel so guilty because once a bully always a bully. Nothing can excuse what i did. But i think ive changed. This was four years ago. All the friends forgave me but i don’t forgive me. People say once a bully always a bully. I don’t think thats true i don’t feel like a bully. Id say i changed. I was a weird kid, then a popular kid. And now a weird kid again. But this guilt still eats at me. I love everything and everyone. I love bugs. I love people. Id never judge or be rude to anyone ever again. I haven’t in four years. I now cant even say no to people. But i still feel so guilty. What can i do to help. Is it true once a bully always a bully. Can i still be whimsical because its not just about style its about personality and inside. But does my past define me..? NOT VENTING. just a question. So can i be whimsical if i used to be a bully?

I used to be bullied so bad to the point i ended up bullying my friends with the bullies so they would stop hurting me (they would send me home with scratches and bruises) then became bullied again and it repeated. This was four years ago. All the friends forgave me but i don’t forgive me. People say once a bully always a bully. I don’t think thats true i don’t feel like a bully. Id say i changed. I was a weird kid, then a popular kid. And now a weird kid again. But this guilt still eats at me. I love everything and everyone. I love bugs. I love people. Id never judge or be rude to anyone ever again. I haven’t in four years. I now cant even say no to people. But i still feel so guilty. What can i do to help. Is it true once a bully always a bully. And what i mean by i was a bully was i would bark and be kinda mean to them.

Okay so im outing my age. Im 16. Ive been diagnosed with bipolar 2 for almost a year now. Ive felt this way since I was 12. I know how i will die. Its going to be suicide. I just don’t know when or how. Ive tried 7 times. I don’t think I will or can get better. Will I always be this miserable. Will I always hate myself and life so much. I just need reassurance that maybe it will get better. And this wont be how I will die. That maybe theres still a chance for me. I know this is so corny. Sometimes i feel so great and i love life so much and i just want to be like that all the time. It comes in waves big scary waves. And im scared. Is this bad to say. Im sorry. Dont worry i will reach out for help. Im going to talk to my physcatrist.