I had a dream where the Carpenters, Sabrina Carpenter and a literal carpenter released a single together

It was just Yesterday Once More, Espresso and carpenter working sounds playing at the same time.

My idea for a Gavan Bushido V-Cinext movie

Since Gavan Infinity is getting a V-Cinext movie starring Infinity, Raiya and the new Gavan Eterniry, I hope there'll be another movie that focuses on Setsuna and expands on his backstory. My idea for the story is that Setsuna returns to the planet where he was made and confronts his manufacturers, with one of the villains being an android of the model that replaced him. It would also be cool to learn more about his past as a soldier and his relationship with the woman that gave him his name. What do you guys think?

▲ 185 r/Jokes

A woman was cleaning up her parents' attic

Her period cramps were making the job painful. While moving some boxes, she found a golden lamp and rubbed it. A genie came out and told her that he can grant her one wish.

"Ugh... I wish there were no periods." Said the woman.

"Your wish is granted Now we're all going to sound restless while speaking Don't you think it was a bad idea?"

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u/Prestigious_Bad_7646 — 3 days ago

[M 20] Am I asexual or just screwing with my own mind?

I am a 20 years old, heterosexual guy, and a high-functioning autistic. I have been thinking for the last few hours about asexuality and if I'm on that spectrum. Honestly, this is quite surprising, considering I get a new crush almost every month. I don't even remember what triggered this thought even though it was very recent.

Why I think I might be on the asexuality spectrum:

  • I'm repulsed at the idea of sex when it's not done to conceive a child. I don't mind hugging, kissing, cuddling or even cuddling naked with a partner. But thinking about the penetration itself makes me feel weird and nauseous , and I find it strange that people do it just for fun and not only to bear children. After all, you'd see people saying they'd have sex once a day if they could, but you won't see women wanting to give birth every day. I know it's not entirely the same thing, but still.
  • I could handle being in a relationship with an asexual partner, even if that means we won't get intimate often (though I can't imagine a relationship where I don't or rarely get to hug my partner. Hugs are fun).
  • The fact that I'm even bothered about this now may mean something. If it was just a passing thought I wouldn't think so much about it, let alone post here.

Why I don't think I might be on the asexuality spectrum:

  • Recently I found a really cute girl on a dating app. She's asexual herself, so I think it's possible that I'm consciously pretending to be asexual just so we'd have this in common.
  • I've always been a little jealous at the LGBTQ+ community for how united and strong they are. This might be because I'm autistic and don't have any friends that I can turn to when I need support (I do have friends, but they're more people to hang around with for a few hours in Friday than shoulders to lean on). Meanwhile, the LGBTQ+ community is like a warm circle of support. It's possible that, again, I'm consciously trying to make myself asexual to feel like I belong somewhere.
  • I've heard that watching sexual content can give people wrong impression of sex and may even repulse them. While I don't watch porn, I do watch videos with sexual tones and masturbate a lot.
  • The fact that I don't mind physical touch, or even an intimate naked cuddling, feels contrary to being asexual.

So, what do you think? Am I asexual or not? And sorry if I offend anyone. I don't know shit about asexuality so I may have gotten a few things wrong here. This is unintentional.

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u/Prestigious_Bad_7646 — 13 days ago
▲ 0 r/Jokes

A tribe of cannibals are having a BBQ

Another cannibal joins them, and a burnt naked woman's corpse is sitting on his erect penis. "Ew! Get this away from here!" Said the chief. "Why? You asked me to bring kebab."

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u/Prestigious_Bad_7646 — 23 days ago

Describe a Kamen Rider season, but make the main Rider sound like a villain.

I saw a post like that in r/shitpostcrusaders so I wanted to make one here too. Here are a few examples:

* An amnesiac cook goes against God's plan and kills his angels.

* A journalist stands in the way of a guy who just wants to save his dying little sister.

* A drummer is part of an organization that dedicates itself to killing members of the local wildlife with loud music, and also recruits child soldiers.

* Grandma's boy ruins any chance for peace between humans and aliens.

* A homeless man finds a dismembered hand, uses it to abuse animals and steal money.

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u/Prestigious_Bad_7646 — 24 days ago
▲ 115 r/tf2memes

AITA for teleporting bread for three days?

I (50M) live together with eight other mercenaries. Recently, two of them (fake names), Mechanic (52M) and Doctor (??M) have created a teleporter. It's a machine that can transport objects and people from one place to another. My partners have been using it to get alcohol for Friday nights. I've been using it to teleport bread. I love bread.

Three days ago, Mechanic and Doctor discovered that teleported bread starts growing tumors. It enraged it and I lashed out on Reconnaissance Specialist (23M), but Mechanic told me to calm down, and that I can still teleport bread. Since we all had only three days to live (it was really grim, but at least I had my dying wish granted and got a bucket), I decided to spent my final moments teleporting bread.

So today, Doctor realized that the tumors are not dangerous and that we won't die. Mechanic told us that everything should be okay as long as no one teleports any bread. When I told him that I did nothing but teleport bread for three days (to be fair, he told me that I can do that), he and Doctor got angry. We also had to deal with a mutant bread monster. Though we defeated the bread, Doctor and Mechanic don't let me use the teleporter anymore. AITA?

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u/Prestigious_Bad_7646 — 1 month ago

Is it childish/immature to be so bothered and anxious whenever I have to stay late at work? How do I stop treating it like it's the end of the world whenever it happens?

I am 20 years old, male. I work in an office where we help people with financial problems. In about a month I'll leave this place and go to university. I was never very social while I was in school, so I'm excited to finally go there. Unfortunately, I think that this excitement is affecting my enjoyment of my current job.

I work every day from 8:00 to 14:00, but sometimes, while helping someone, I have to stay a few minutes later. Recently it has become much more frequent. When I have to stay late, I grow anxious and angry. I keep it in so that I won't lash out on my co-workers and/or make a fool of myself, but it's painful to keep it in. Today was the last straw that led me to write this post. I had to stay another hour.

I know I can't tell someone in trouble that they'll have to wait because I have to go home now. I don't even have a good reason to go back home. I do have dog training classes on Mondays and martial arts classes on Tuesdays, but they both happen hours after I finish work, so it's not like I'd miss them.

How do I stop worrying and getting angry whenever I have to stay late?

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u/Prestigious_Bad_7646 — 1 month ago

Reimagining Super Sentai as Kamen Rider (part 1?) - Kamen Rider Shugodom.

A few days ago, I thought about how some Super Sentai series could work as Kamen Rider shows. I wrote a reimagination of Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger, which is very similar in tone to Rider, as a Kamen Rider show. Hopefully this will become a series of posts (I might do the same thing with Boonboomger next). Unfortunately I'm not coinfident in my drawing skills so I didn't draw anything listed below. Anyways, here's the concept:

  • The main five Riders

The Riders are named after their respective kingdoms (Kamen Rider Shugodom, Kamen Rider NKosopa, Kamen Rider Ishabana, Kamen Rider Gokkan and Kamen Rider Toufu), and are based on the five main King-Ohgers. They use the Shugodriver (which is similar to the grip of the OhgerCalibur) to transform. The collective device is the Shugod Souls, which resemble their crystalized appearance in King-Ohger but have switches on them, making them similar to both the OhgerCalibur and the Astroswitches. They still use the OhgerCalibur and King's Weapon as their weapons, and the Calibur interacts with the Shugod Souls. Their backstories are the same as in the Sentai, and the Shugods still exist, but they can't combine into King-Ohger.

  • Other forms

The Riders can use auxiliary Shugod souls to transform into other bug-based forms. There are Shugod Souls for all of the Shugods in King-Ohger. Shugodom's first upgrade, which can also be used by the other Riders but not as frequently, is Kamen Rider [Rider name here] Legend, which is accessed with either the God Kabuto, God Scorpion or God Hopper Shugod souls and equip them with their weapons.

  • Dark Rider

Kamen Rider Lord Shugodom is OhKuwagata Ohger's counterpart. He uses the Lord Shugodriver, a recolor of the Shugodriver, to transform, and the OhgerCalibur ZERO and King's Weapon as weapons.

  • Spider Kumonos/Kamen Rider Kumonos

Jeramie is an elusive and unpredictable character, so I decided to give him the Mashin Chaser, Night Rogue and Valvarad treatment: He starts as the pseudo-Rider Spider Kumonos. Despite the name, it looks different from the Ranger in King-Ohger, and instead looks like a cross between a Rider and a Bugnarok, emphasizing his nature as a human-Bugnarok hybrid. He uses the Venomix Shooter as a transformation device and weapon. After the timeskip, Yanma build the Kumonos Driver, which he uses with the Kumonos Keys to transform into Kamen Rider Kumonos. The Kumonos Driver can be detached from its buckle and extends into the Kumonoslayer.

  • Kamen Rider Shugodom's upgrade forms.

In addition to the Legend forms mentioned above, Shugodom has two, exclusive enchanted forms. The first, accessed by inserting the Venomix Shooter in the Shugodriver, fuses him with Kumonos and is called Kamen Rider Extreme Shugodom. The second, Kamen Rider King Shugodom, is the counterpart for King Kuwagata Ohger, and is accessed using a hive-like Shugod Soul. It gives him the powers of all Shugods as well as the Ohger CrownLance.

  • Villains

The Bugnarok and Uchu are both the same as in Sentai, but have human forms. And since Dagded is a parasitic sea bear, he spends most of the series possessing other people before obtaining his body.

  • Movie/Spin-off Riders

Haven't really thought about it a lot, but there'll be two movie Riders based on Reiniol Husty and Evil King Gira. Both use the Lord Shugodriver to transform.

u/Prestigious_Bad_7646 — 1 month ago

I had a dream where a very nihilistic Sheldon Cooper was a character in the first Mortal Kombat.

Instead of mutilating his opponents when it's time to finish them, he would instead tell them that victory will give them no satisfaction as all of their achievements will be erased in the heat death of the universe, causing them to burst out crying. The announcer fittingly says Mentality instead of Fatality when it happens.

u/Prestigious_Bad_7646 — 1 month ago