I just moved in to a new neigborhood, it started as rumination wether I am being judged, liked or what, Now I'm back to compulsions , just researching reddit constantly, It's kinda stressful
What do you guys do if there are major changes in your life? How do you get out of the loop?
How do I deal with rumination when more thinking causes more thinking. It's an endless loop
I don't know if I'm trapped by the Tao instead of flowing. I learned practical things, But this is another ebb, This causes me so confusion. I want to learn/practice the tao. But my OCD mind frames everything, even in simple things. I don't know if this is beneficial but its exhausting. like for example, working out, before working out I ponder wether Im doing to much or not, My mind says "This chapter applies to this" Or a personal problem, "This line applies to this" . I mean its kinda beneficial but I know its not the only solution, The reason for this is because I got so much benefits from taoism that alsmost everything needs taoist consultation. Experience is the best teacher they say, The real tao is not being talked but to be experienced. But I have negative experiences, I have been conditioned. When reflecting about my responses I know its not rational but the trauma is there I don't know how to experience when All I experience is fear. I really don't know what's happening to me. Im running out of answer, I guess Im too obsessed with Taoism that I discard things outside taoism. I want to learn but I guess Its too much. I want to be serious in practice but I guess its being exaggerated.