u/Sheikhonderun

Excerpt from Sulaiman Jhanjhee (rah)'s speeches and notes.

We have three enemies: (1) Satan, (2) Ego (nafs) and (3) Bad habits

Ego is the architect; it’s more senior than Satan in instructing evil.

“…for indeed the inner self (nafsa) is ever inclined to evil” (12:53)

One day I asked my teacher Inamul Hasan Kandhlawi (rah).

“Satan deceives everyone but who deceived Satan?”

In heaven, there were angels. There wasn’t any other devil there to deceive Satan.

Inamul Hasan (rah) replied, “It was his own ego (nafs) that deceived him.”

While living in heaven, his focus shifted from Allah towards himself.

Instead of praising Allah, he started praising himself.

He started to think of himself, ‘I am great.’

All of us have this enemy within ourselves, the ego (nafs).

The Prophet (saw) said, “To mention your brother in a way he dislikes…If what you say about him is true, it is backbiting. If it is not true, it is slander.”
(Muslim 2589)

Scholar Farooq Makki said:

“One of the biggest sins we commit so casually is backbiting and slandering—we do it without hesitation.

While performing Tawaf in Makkah, if someone pushes us. ‘They are all like this.’  Or we say, ‘People from that country don’t know how to pray.’

If we slander, we do so on a large scale. We pass remarks and sometimes criticize an entire country, an ethnicity or a tribe. Do we reflect on what we are saying? How will we enter Paradise passing statements like these?”

When it comes to marriage.

If a man was supposed to marry a woman. It breaks off or he goes through a divorce. He will sometimes criticize the woman’s complete family, ethnicity, country and gender; make irresponsible statements that all women are like this.

This is slander.

Similarly, if a woman was supposed to marry a man. It breaks off or she goes through a divorce. She will sometimes criticize the man’s complete family, ethnicity, country and gender; make irresponsible statements that all men are like this.

This is also slander.

Excerpt from Sulaiman Jhanjhee (rah)'s speeches and notes.

We have three enemies: (1) Satan, (2) Ego (nafs) and (3) Bad habits

Ego is the architect; it’s more senior than Satan in instructing evil.

“…for indeed the inner self (nafsa) is ever inclined to evil” (12:53)

One day I asked my teacher Inamul Hasan Kandhlawi (rah).

“Satan deceives everyone but who deceived Satan?”

In heaven, there were angels. There wasn’t any other devil there to deceive Satan.

Inamul Hasan (rah) replied, “It was his own ego (nafs) that deceived him.”

While living in heaven, his focus shifted from Allah towards himself.

Instead of praising Allah, he started praising himself.

He started to think of himself, ‘I am great.’

All of us have this enemy within ourselves, the ego (nafs).

Excerpt from Ubaidullah Balyavi (rah)’s speeches and notes.

If the spending of us Muslims on marriage is reduced and what is saved is spent in the path of Allah—on knowledge, on inviting towards faith, on spreading faith, on helping the poor and needy, on helping widows, on feeding those who are hungry, on clothing those without clothes, on giving water to the thirsty, on building rest houses and on digging wells.

Prophet (saw) said, “Who will purchase the well of Rumah and place his bucket alongside the buckets of the Muslims, in exchange for better than that in Paradise?” Uthman (rad) purchased this.
(Nasai 3608)

Despite his purchasing it, he didn’t have any privileged access to it but the same access as any other Muslim.

On the expedition of Tabuk, the Prophet (saw) asked, “Who will spend something which Allah shall accept?” Uthman (rad) responded that he will spend.
(Tirmidhi 3699)

Uthman (rad) responded, “I will take responsibility for 100 camels, including their equipment.” Prophet (saw) urged support. Uthman (rad) responded, “200 camels…” Prophet (saw) urged support. Uthman (rad) responded, “300 camels…”
(Tirmidhi 3700)

Prophet (saw) said, “Whatever Uthman does after today will not harm him.”
(Tirmidhi 3701)

When the expenses of marriage are reduced, the spending in the path of Allah will be increased.  

That is why till the day of judgement, Allah will grant the Companions (rad) the reward of this complete religion.

Because in the beginning, they sacrificed their lives and wealth.

Excerpt from Hussain Ahmed Madani (rah)’s speeches and notes.

Good actions like prayer, hajj, etc. have external forms of worship, but internal worship is gratitude.

We should express gratitude for performing good actions.

Unless and until there is gratitude, the soul will not benefit.

As gratitude enriches the soul.

“If you express gratitude, I shall certainly give you more” (14:7)

Excerpt from Sayyid Abrar Dhulyawi (rah)’s speeches and notes.

In Arabic, it’s called ‘namima’ or calumny, which refers to malicious gossip intended to cause conflict between people or to damage their reputations.

Prophet (saw) passed by two graves and said, “Verily, they are both being punished but not for a sin difficult to avoid. One is punished for the habit of calumnies while the other is punished for the habit of soiling himself with urine.”
(Bukhari 1378)

During Abdul Malik Marwan’s reign, a servant through calumny instigated a dispute between a husband and wife. This made the husband suspicious, and he killed his wife. When the wife’s family found out, they killed the husband. Both the husband and wife were no more but a conflict broke out between the two families.

Per one narration, the first thing to be called to account on the Day of Judgement will be prayer. (Riyad Salihin 1081) Whereas in another narration, the first cases to be decided among the people will be bloodshed. (Bukhari 6684)

Because among Allah’s rights, the first matter to be accounted for is prayer. Whereas among people’s rights, the first matter to be accounted for is unlawful bloodshed.

Scholars have attempted to explain the relationship between the punishments of the grave and the first accountabilities on the Day of Judgement.

The explanation is due to unclean urine; there is negligence in prayer. And due to calumnies, conflicts arise that can lead to murder.

Thus, these punishments begin in the life of the grave long before the Day of Judgement.

The Prophet (saw) said, “To mention your brother in a way he dislikes…If what you say about him is true, it is backbiting. If it is not true, it is slander.”
(Muslim 2589)

Scholar Farooq Makki said:

“One of the biggest sins we commit so casually is backbiting and slandering—we do it without hesitation.

While performing Tawaf in Makkah, if someone pushes us. ‘They are all like this.’  Or we say, ‘People from that country don’t know how to pray.’

If we slander, we do so on a large scale. We pass remarks and sometimes criticize an entire country, an ethnicity or a tribe. Do we reflect on what we are saying? How will we enter Paradise passing statements like these?”

When it comes to marriage.

If a man was supposed to marry a woman. It breaks off or he goes through a divorce. He will sometimes criticize the woman’s complete family, ethnicity, country and gender; make irresponsible statements that all women are like this.

This is slander.

Similarly, if a woman was supposed to marry a man. It breaks off or she goes through a divorce. She will sometimes criticize the man’s complete family, ethnicity, country and gender; make irresponsible statements that all men are like this.

This is also slander.

The Prophet (saw) said, “To mention your brother in a way he dislikes…If what you say about him is true, it is backbiting. If it is not true, it is slander.”
(Muslim 2589)

Scholar Farooq Makki said:

“One of the biggest sins we commit so casually is backbiting and slandering—we do it without hesitation.

While performing Tawaf in Makkah, if someone pushes us. ‘They are all like this.’  Or we say, ‘People from that country don’t know how to pray.’

If we slander, we do so on a large scale. We pass remarks and sometimes criticize an entire country, an ethnicity or a tribe. Do we reflect on what we are saying? How will we enter Paradise passing statements like these?”

When it comes to marriage.

If a man was supposed to marry a woman. It breaks off or he goes through a divorce. He will sometimes criticize the woman’s complete family, ethnicity, country and gender; make irresponsible statements that all women are like this.

This is slander.

Similarly, if a woman was supposed to marry a man. It breaks off or she goes through a divorce. She will sometimes criticize the man’s complete family, ethnicity, country and gender; make irresponsible statements that all men are like this.

This is also slander.

Excerpt from Sayyid Abrar Dhulyawi (rah)’s speeches and notes.

In Arabic, it’s called ‘namima’ or calumny, which refers to malicious gossip intended to cause conflict between people or to damage their reputations.

Prophet (saw) passed by two graves and said, “Verily, they are both being punished but not for a sin difficult to avoid. One is punished for the habit of calumnies while the other is punished for the habit of soiling himself with urine.”
(Bukhari 1378)

During Abdul Malik Marwan’s reign, a servant through calumny instigated a dispute between a husband and wife. This made the husband suspicious, and he killed his wife. When the wife’s family found out, they killed the husband. Both the husband and wife were no more but a conflict broke out between the two families.

Per one narration, the first thing to be called to account on the Day of Judgement will be prayer. (Riyad Salihin 1081) Whereas in another narration, the first cases to be decided among the people will be bloodshed. (Bukhari 6684)

Because among Allah’s rights, the first matter to be accounted for is prayer. Whereas among people’s rights, the first matter to be accounted for is unlawful bloodshed.

Scholars have attempted to explain the relationship between the punishments of the grave and the first accountabilities on the Day of Judgement.

The explanation is due to unclean urine; there is negligence in prayer. And due to calumnies, conflicts arise that can lead to murder.

Thus, these punishments begin in the life of the grave long before the Day of Judgement.

Excerpt from Mufti Tariq Masood’s speeches and notes.

In marital conflicts, always listen to both sides before having an opinion. In fact, it’s best to reserve your judgment on a matter until you hear both sides.

People can lie whether it’s the husband or the wife. People present themselves in a naive manner to manipulate or influence you.

One man came with his son and started complaining about his wife. She is quarrelsome, always bitter, and disobedient to him.

We know that in Islam a wife is expected to be obedient to her husband. So he started by saying that his wife is of ill character and argues with him.

Now, any listener would get misguided and easily swayed by that narrative to support the husband.

He didn’t divulge the actual reason his wife is upset with him.

The son who was sitting with him told me in the meeting that the father is involved in drugs and has wasted a lot of money on them.

Similarly, a woman complained to me that her husband doesn’t financially support her.

We know that in Islam a husband is expected to financially support his wife. So she started by saying that her husband is not good. Somewhat naively expresses that her husband doesn’t provide for her, as if she doesn’t know a husband should be providing for her.

Now, any listener would get misguided and easily swayed by that narrative to support the wife.

If people didn’t know that the husband is expected to provide in Islam, even the homeless would have got married.

When I caught and questioned her husband, he proved to me, through his bank statements, that he has been providing for his wife. When I confronted his wife, she had nothing to say.

Now when people like these create false narratives in trying to portray their spouse as evil and wicked.

How much hatred and suspicion among men and women do they create in society? They accumulate that sin.

Obviously, there are disobedient wives and irresponsible men. But we should always listen to both sides before forming an opinion.  

Excerpt from Ibrahim Dewla’s speeches and notes.

To create consistency in one’s actions and not allow any free time to go to waste.

This cultivates a temperament of servitude. This temperament is necessary.

People tame animals to do work for them. An animal’s true nature is wild. But if it’s trained and disciplined then it becomes accustomed to its home. Even if you leave it outside, it will return to its home.

I remember when I was young. We would see the buffalo enter the pond to cool itself. If we tried to swim towards it, it would go further away. Later, we would leave.

After the buffalo had its time in the water, it would then return home by itself.

Why? Because it’s accustomed to that home now.

In the same way, a person who becomes accustomed to worship develops attachment to it. After that, there is no need to wake that individual; they wake up on their own.

If someone says I cannot wake up that means there is yet to be attachment to that worship.

Like the buffalo. If there is no attachment, it will wander in the wilderness. But if there is an attachment, it will return home.  

Therefore, through consistency (istiqama) we will develop attachment to worship and righteous actions.

Excerpt from Farhat Hashmi’s speeches and notes.

Aisha (rad) reported: “…Then the Prophet returned therewith, his heart was trembling, and he went to Khadija and said: Wrap me up, wrap me up! So they wrapped him till the fear had left him.

He then said to Khadija: O Khadija! What has happened to me? And he informed her of the happening, saying: I fear for myself.

She replied: It can’t be. Be happy. I swear by Allah that He shall never humiliate you. By Allah, you join ties of relationship, you speak the truth, you bear people’s burden, you help the destitute, you entertain guests, and you help against the vicissitudes which affect people…”
(Muslim 160a)

She knows and acknowledges her husband’s good traits.

People who live with us, we don’t know or acknowledge their good traits.

Because we are self-absorbed, invested in our own world and thoughts.

We constantly look for shortcomings.

Where is the shortcoming?

What is ‘not there’?

Our focus is on that.

Excerpt from Farhat Hashmi’s speeches and notes.

Aisha (rad) reported: “…Then the Prophet returned therewith, his heart was trembling, and he went to Khadija and said: Wrap me up, wrap me up! So they wrapped him till the fear had left him.

He then said to Khadija: O Khadija! What has happened to me? And he informed her of the happening, saying: I fear for myself.

She replied: It can’t be. Be happy. I swear by Allah that He shall never humiliate you. By Allah, you join ties of relationship, you speak the truth, you bear people’s burden, you help the destitute, you entertain guests, and you help against the vicissitudes which affect people…”
(Muslim 160a)

She knows and acknowledges her husband’s good traits.

People who live with us, we don’t know or acknowledge their good traits.

Because we are self-absorbed, invested in our own world and thoughts.

We constantly look for shortcomings.

Where is the shortcoming?

What is ‘not there’?

Our focus is on that.

Excerpt from Mufti Tariq Masood’s speeches and notes.

In marital conflicts, always listen to both sides before having an opinion. In fact, it’s best to reserve your judgment on a matter until you hear both sides.

People can lie whether it’s the husband or the wife. People present themselves in a naive manner to manipulate or influence you.

One man came with his son and started complaining about his wife. She is quarrelsome, always bitter, and disobedient to him.

We know that in Islam a wife is expected to be obedient to her husband. So he started by saying that his wife is of ill character and argues with him.

Now, any listener would get misguided and easily swayed by that narrative to support the husband.

He didn’t divulge the actual reason his wife is upset with him.

The son who was sitting with him told me in the meeting that the father is involved in drugs and has wasted a lot of money on them.

Similarly, a woman complained to me that her husband doesn’t financially support her.

We know that in Islam a husband is expected to financially support his wife. So she started by saying that her husband is not good. Somewhat naively expresses that her husband doesn’t provide for her, as if she doesn’t know a husband should be providing for her.

Now, any listener would get misguided and easily swayed by that narrative to support the wife.

If people didn’t know that the husband is expected to provide in Islam, even the homeless would have got married.

When I caught and questioned her husband, he proved to me, through his bank statements, that he has been providing for his wife. When I confronted his wife, she had nothing to say.

Now when people like these create false narratives in trying to portray their spouse as evil and wicked.

How much hatred and suspicion among men and women do they create in society? They accumulate that sin.

Obviously, there are disobedient wives and irresponsible men. But we should always listen to both sides before forming an opinion.  

Excerpt from Sulaiman Jhanjhee (rah)'s speeches and notes.

We have three enemies: (1) Satan, (2) Ego (nafs) and (3) Bad habits

Ego is the architect; it’s more senior than Satan in instructing evil.

“…for indeed the inner self (nafsa) is ever inclined to evil” (12:53)

One day I asked my teacher Inamul Hasan Kandhlawi (rah).

“Satan deceives everyone but who deceived Satan?”

In heaven, there were angels. There wasn’t any other devil there to deceive Satan.

Inamul Hasan (rah) replied, “It was his own ego (nafs) that deceived him.”

While living in heaven, his focus shifted from Allah towards himself.

Instead of praising Allah, he started praising himself.

He started to think of himself, ‘I am great.’

All of us have this enemy within ourselves, the ego (nafs).

Excerpt from Hussain Ahmed Madani (rah)’s speeches and notes.

Good actions like prayer, hajj, etc. have external forms of worship, but internal worship is gratitude.

We should express gratitude for performing good actions.

Unless and until there is gratitude, the soul will not benefit.

As gratitude enriches the soul.

“If you express gratitude, I shall certainly give you more” (14:7)

Excerpt from Sayyid Abrar Dhulyawi (rah)’s speeches and notes.

In Arabic, it’s called ‘namima’ or calumny, which refers to malicious gossip intended to cause conflict between people or to damage their reputations.

Prophet (saw) passed by two graves and said, “Verily, they are both being punished but not for a sin difficult to avoid. One is punished for the habit of calumnies while the other is punished for the habit of soiling himself with urine.”
(Bukhari 1378)

During Abdul Malik Marwan’s reign, a servant through calumny instigated a dispute between a husband and wife. This made the husband suspicious, and he killed his wife. When the wife’s family found out, they killed the husband. Both the husband and wife were no more but a conflict broke out between the two families.

Per one narration, the first thing to be called to account on the Day of Judgement will be prayer. (Riyad Salihin 1081) Whereas in another narration, the first cases to be decided among the people will be bloodshed. (Bukhari 6684)

Because among Allah’s rights, the first matter to be accounted for is prayer. Whereas among people’s rights, the first matter to be accounted for is unlawful bloodshed.

Scholars have attempted to explain the relationship between the punishments of the grave and the first accountabilities on the Day of Judgement.

The explanation is due to unclean urine; there is negligence in prayer. And due to calumnies, conflicts arise that can lead to murder.

Thus, these punishments begin in the life of the grave long before the Day of Judgement.

Excerpt from Ubaidullah Balyavi (rah)’s speeches and notes.

If the spending of us Muslims on marriage is reduced and what is saved is spent in the path of Allah—on knowledge, on inviting towards faith, on spreading faith, on helping the poor and needy, on helping widows, on feeding those who are hungry, on clothing those without clothes, on giving water to the thirsty, on building rest houses and on digging wells.

Prophet (saw) said, “Who will purchase the well of Rumah and place his bucket alongside the buckets of the Muslims, in exchange for better than that in Paradise?” Uthman (rad) purchased this.
(Nasai 3608)

Despite his purchasing it, he didn’t have any privileged access to it but the same access as any other Muslim.

On the expedition of Tabuk, the Prophet (saw) asked, “Who will spend something which Allah shall accept?” Uthman (rad) responded that he will spend.
(Tirmidhi 3699)

Uthman (rad) responded, “I will take responsibility for 100 camels, including their equipment.” Prophet (saw) urged support. Uthman (rad) responded, “200 camels…” Prophet (saw) urged support. Uthman (rad) responded, “300 camels…”
(Tirmidhi 3700)

Prophet (saw) said, “Whatever Uthman does after today will not harm him.”
(Tirmidhi 3701)

When the expenses of marriage are reduced, the spending in the path of Allah will be increased.  

That is why till the day of judgement, Allah will grant the Companions (rad) the reward of this complete religion.

Because in the beginning, they sacrificed their lives and wealth.

Excerpt from Mufti Tariq Masood’s speeches and notes.

In marital conflicts, always listen to both sides before having an opinion. In fact, it’s best to reserve your judgment on a matter until you hear both sides.

People can lie whether it’s the husband or the wife. People present themselves in a naive manner to manipulate or influence you.

One man came with his son and started complaining about his wife. She is quarrelsome, always bitter, and disobedient to him.

We know that in Islam a wife is expected to be obedient to her husband. So he started by saying that his wife is of ill character and argues with him.

Now, any listener would get misguided and easily swayed by that narrative to support the husband.

He didn’t divulge the actual reason his wife is upset with him.

The son who was sitting with him told me in the meeting that the father is involved in drugs and has wasted a lot of money on them.

Similarly, a woman complained to me that her husband doesn’t financially support her.

We know that in Islam a husband is expected to financially support his wife. So she started by saying that her husband is not good. Somewhat naively expresses that her husband doesn’t provide for her, as if she doesn’t know a husband should be providing for her.

Now, any listener would get misguided and easily swayed by that narrative to support the wife.

If people didn’t know that the husband is expected to provide in Islam, even the homeless would have got married.

When I caught and questioned her husband, he proved to me, through his bank statements, that he has been providing for his wife. When I confronted his wife, she had nothing to say.

Now when people like these create false narratives in trying to portray their spouse as evil and wicked.

How much hatred and suspicion among men and women do they create in society? They accumulate that sin.

Obviously, there are disobedient wives and irresponsible men. But we should always listen to both sides before forming an opinion.  

Scholar Hussain Ahmed Madani (rah) said and my notes.

“Good actions like prayer, hajj, etc. have external forms of worship, but internal worship is gratitude.”

Marriage is also an external form of worship, wherein the internal worship is gratitude.

Even if there are things in a marriage that are not ideal. Just like in prayer, hajj things or circumstances may not be ideal.

The fact that an individual got married is itself an act of worship for which there should be gratitude.  

A man as a husband should cultivate gratitude in his marriage.

A woman as a wife should cultivate gratitude in her marriage.

“Because unless and until there is gratitude, the soul will not benefit.

As gratitude enriches the soul.

Allah says:

“If you express gratitude, I shall certainly give you more” (14:7)

Therefore, we should express gratitude on any good action we are able to perform.”