u/Specific-Cause-5973

I think I know the answer to this but I just want confirmation that if I cleanse my house wanted spirits won’t go away.

My dog is being put down in our house today. My mom wanted me to cleanse the house before he passed to make sure we don’t cleanse his spirit away. I already smudged but we are having some people over for this that even though I smoke cleansed last night I can feel the energy is already going to a lower vibration.

I was going to frankincense after he left, I have a feeling and some people IRL confirmed it wouldn’t get rid of his spirit and actually welcome spirits and energy we want to be there. Can someone please confirm this for me before cleanse again?

I think I know the answer to this but I just want confirmation that if I cleanse my house wanted spirits won’t go away.

My dog is being put down in our house today. My mom wanted me to cleanse the house before he passed to make sure we don’t cleanse his spirit away. I already smudged but we are having some people over for this that even though I smoke cleansed last night I can feel the energy is already going to a lower vibration.

I was going to frankincense after he left, I have a feeling and some people IRL confirmed it wouldn’t get rid of his spirit and actually welcome spirits and energy we want to be there. Can someone please confirm this for me before cleanse again?

I think I know the answer to this but I just want confirmation that if I cleanse my house wanted spirits won’t go away.

My dog is being put down in our house today. My mom wanted me to cleanse the house before he passed to make sure we don’t cleanse his spirit away. I already smudged but we are having some people over for this that even though I smoke cleansed last night I can feel the energy is already going to a lower vibration.

I was going to frankincense after he left, I have a feeling and some people IRL confirmed it wouldn’t get rid of his spirit and actually welcome spirits and energy we want to be there. Can someone please confirm this for me before cleanse again?

I think I know the answer to this but I just want confirmation that if I cleanse my house wanted spirits won’t go away.

My dog is being put down in our house today. My mom wanted me to cleanse the house before he passed to make sure we don’t cleanse his spirit away. I already smudged but we are having some people over for this that even though I smoke cleansed last night I can feel the energy is already going to a lower vibration.

I was going to frankincense after he left, I have a feeling and some people IRL confirmed it wouldn’t get rid of his spirit and actually welcome spirits and energy we want to be there. Can someone please confirm this for me before cleanse again?

Hello! Idk if this is the right forum but I’m looking for other Black activists and community organizers in Upstate SC who can help me come up with a coordinated response to what is occurring against our community such as the recent verdicts of Rick Chow who murdered Cyrus Carmack-Belton, and the verdict of Karmelo Anthony.

Thank you!

I had a friend who stopped being friends with me. Badly conflict avoidant and I had an inkling if I ever brought up my grievances with this person the friendship would end.

Well that is quite literally exactly what happened. I brought up ways they hurt me and the friendship ended. They brought up resentment from 3 years ago when they asked me to edit something for them, felt like I criticized it harshly. It was wild they waited until 3 years when I brought up a grievance to even bring this up, and at the time I was beside myself. They told me not to think our friendship wasn’t real because it was.

I realize now that wasn’t the case. What he believed to be kindness was cruelty. He felt like I couldn’t handle conflict when at the end of the day it was him. Everyone who knows me knows I am one who is always willing to have difficult conversations, if a problem is brought up to me I sit with it, internalize the message, and seek to correct my behavior and the issue at hand. But then decided I could not handle it. It was a projection of his own conflict aversion.

I also had a wild ride with my own self esteem stemming from childhood. It’s much better than it ever has been now, but admittedly it dipped after the friendship breakup. I had this philosophy that no one was so nice to pretend to be friends with you. But I could tell for a while the friendship was waning, when I kept suggesting friendship trips and they’d plan it with everyone but me, and other things too. But I figured it was all in my head because the other philosophy I had is if someone cares about you and your bond with them, they’ll be willing to have difficult conversations that will make the friendship stronger.

And I realized I’m correct. NO ONE is so nice to pretend to be friends with anyone. To do so is actually an act of extreme cruelty. He tries to be kind but at the end of the day, he is beyond cruel.

And realizing we were never friends, not truly, has helped me to finally get over it. I had grieved it after a month, but the was still a lingering sting of betrayal. Sure there was a betrayal but why am I holding weight to a betrayal to someone who projected their conflict avoidance onto me, to make it seem I was the one who couldn’t handle it to avoid a level of blame. Why would I hold any weight to a betrayal of anyone who clearly had no idea who I was in so many regards and I realized in our final conversations he had never truly seen me. Why would I hold any weight to a person who holds grudges and does not bring up problems until I bring up something first, then brings up something totally unrelated from years ago, mean girls type of shit. Why would I hold any weight to a person who values their ego over relationships.

I am quick to take the blame, but for once I realized this is not me.

And in the months since this friendship breakup, I have found true friendship so pure. I know what it is like to be seen. To have a bond that can handle hardship. To have people who value me enough to have conversations. And I never have to doubt where I stand with them, they make it clear and they know they can expect the same of me in return. They know that a disagreement is a place for conversation and not an end. I am so thankful for the friendships I’ve fostered that I may not have had that friendship had ended.

A major part of closure for me is kinda just speaking my mind to the person even if I don’t expect any type of response. I understand that’s messy and I’m beyond that, so I will pretend this will get to him somehow, and he will find this, and regardless of he internalizes the message, I got it off my chest and I can live free of the weight of a fake friendship that haunted me, and bask within the pure love I receive in the friendships I have nurtured due to this friendship ending. And I can delete you off my socials, I can let go of the momentos, and move towards living in the present.

Our friendship ending was the best thing that happened. It has changed my life so much for the better. And I am so grateful for where I am today as a result. I can’t help but say I hope my absence was felt in your life for the pain you caused me the first month of this year, but in the end, I hope your life ended up better as a result.

I had a friend who stopped being friends with me. Badly conflict avoidant and I had an inkling if I ever brought up my grievances with this person the friendship would end.

Well that is quite literally exactly what happened. I brought up ways they hurt me and the friendship ended. They brought up resentment from 3 years ago when they asked me to edit something for them, felt like I criticized it harshly. It was wild they waited until 3 years when I brought up a grievance to even bring this up, and at the time I was beside myself. They told me not to think our friendship wasn’t real because it was.

I realize now that wasn’t the case. What he believed to be kindness was cruelty. He felt like I couldn’t handle conflict when at the end of the day it was him. Everyone who knows me knows I am one who is always willing to have difficult conversations, if a problem is brought up to me I sit with it, internalize the message, and seek to correct my behavior and the issue at hand. But then decided I could not handle it. It was a projection of his own conflict aversion.

I also had a wild ride with my own self esteem stemming from childhood. It’s much better than it ever has been now, but admittedly it dipped after the friendship breakup. I had this philosophy that no one was so nice to pretend to be friends with you. But I could tell for a while the friendship was waning, when I kept suggesting friendship trips and they’d plan it with everyone but me, and other things too. But I figured it was all in my head because the other philosophy I had is if someone cares about you and your bond with them, they’ll be willing to have difficult conversations that will make the friendship stronger.

And I realized I’m correct. NO ONE is so nice to pretend to be friends with anyone. To do so is actually an act of extreme cruelty. He tries to be kind but at the end of the day, he is beyond cruel.

And realizing we were never friends, not truly, has helped me to finally get over it. I had grieved it after a month, but the was still a lingering sting of betrayal. Sure there was a betrayal but why am I holding weight to a betrayal to someone who projected their conflict avoidance onto me, to make it seem I was the one who couldn’t handle it to avoid a level of blame. Why would I hold any weight to a betrayal of anyone who clearly had no idea who I was in so many regards and I realized in our final conversations he had never truly seen me. Why would I hold any weight to a person who holds grudges and does not bring up problems until I bring up something first, then brings up something totally unrelated from years ago, mean girls type of shit. Why would I hold any weight to a person who values their ego over relationships.

I am quick to take the blame, but for once I realized this is not me.

And in the months since this friendship breakup, I have found true friendship so pure. I know what it is like to be seen. To have a bond that can handle hardship. To have people who value me enough to have conversations. And I never have to doubt where I stand with them, they make it clear and they know they can expect the same of me in return. They know that a disagreement is a place for conversation and not an end. I am so thankful for the friendships I’ve fostered that I may not have had that friendship had ended.

A major part of closure for me is kinda just speaking my mind to the person even if I don’t expect any type of response. I understand that’s messy and I’m beyond that, so I will pretend this will get to him somehow, and he will find this, and regardless of he internalizes the message, I got it off my chest and I can live free of the weight of a fake friendship that haunted me, and bask within the pure love I receive in the friendships I have nurtured due to this friendship ending. And I can delete you off my socials, I can let go of the momentos, and move towards living in the present.

Our friendship ending was the best thing that happened. It has changed my life so much for the better. And I am so grateful for where I am today as a result. I can’t help but say I hope my absence was felt in your life for the pain you caused me the first month of this year, but in the end, I hope your life ended up better as a result.