u/Superb_Zone_1154

Everyone says a PhD is the worst financial decision you can make. As a current PhD student or PhD graduate, what is your experience? How bad is it really ? Did you find a job ?

I’m especially interested in those who did a PhD in agriculture or biological and physics related fields. And if your PhD is interdisciplinary like mine is, I’m even more interested !

Let me know your experience with the current living crisis. I want to know how to prepare for life after PhD.

Hi, I’m 22 with Saturn in 7th house in cancer. I have Capricorn rising, Sag sun and Pisces moon. I keep seeing everyone say that Saturn in 7th house will mean you will get married late and that relationships are serious and will teach u lessons. This has been true so far and I’m getting sick of it.

Hii, I’m 22F and after a breakup with my bf of 2 years I just feel like there is so much empty space. He was my only friend and it was so nice having a built in person. A relationship just comes with so much routines, dates, socialising with him or his friends etc. I don’t have much friends and I’m really shy / introverted. After the breakup I made a conscious effort to meet people, go to places/events and just do new things. However, it’s so much effort to organise hangouts with friends when you have no long-term close friends. I’m starting from scratch in the friendship department. Any advice ?

For context, I live in a place where it isn’t easy to make new friends. I am a PhD student and my hobbies include playing soccer, going to a local philosophy club, and running or artsy stuff. I don’t really drink and I’ve never been clubbing. I have like 2 friends and no close friends at all.

Hi guys I (22F) broke up with my ex bf (23M) because he joined the airforce and had no time for me. He stopped considering me, couldn’t comfort me when I cried, made promises about gifts and future plans instead of meeting my present needs. It has been 6 months since the breakup and since then I have :

Started a PhD in neuroscience
Written over 13k words for my PhD
Playing soccer more seriously
Joined a philosophy club and made friends
Picked up junk journaling
Made other friends and we do board game picnics, junk journaling, paint-and-sip events and Pilates and i booked 3 concerts

I was crying everyday for months after I ghosted my ex from feeling hurt. Now Im no longer crying and feel more neutral and proud of myself. Should I send him a text ?

The ending was a bit complex because he was against me doing a PhD… He also seemed a bit emotionally closed off and idk things went so fast and I became anxious and he became more distant and I eventually ghosted him…

My counsellor said he’s probably just as confused but we can’t know if he’s moved on or not.

I know there’s no way of knowing but how likely is it that it’s a girlfriend vs a friend vs a random stranger?

Hii I’m 22F and first year PhD student. I want to work alongside my PhD but I can’t find any part time RA jobs that I’m qualified for and I don’t really have enough experience to get hired in the roles that are available. What sort of things should I be applying for if I want a casual or part time role ?

Hii, I’m 22F and just started my PhD this year. I really want to move out from my parent’s home and live on my own but I don’t think i can afford it ok just the scholarship. So I’m wondering how hard it is to balance a job with a PhD. Is that a common thing people do ? Or should I not work and focus on the PhD ? I also want some work experience because I’m worried I won’t have any by the time I finish the PhD and then I’ll struggle to find work.

Recently I was at rock bottom because I went through a breakup, graduated uni, had career uncertainty because I was applying to jobs and scholarships all at once and my ex bf became awful as he joined military etc. I cried daily for 6 months but also I’ve made so much progress this year. I was at rock bottom this year. What was your rock bottom and did things get better ?

Does anyone else struggle with writing a “research story” ? My supervisor keeps telling me to write a story. But it’s so hard to link all the seperate parts, my project is so interdisciplinary lol. And I just suck at structuring because I will write everything and not know how to link each paragraph. It’s so hard.

I’m 22F and started my PhD at the start of this year My ex boyfriend (23M) of 2+ years was very upset, and had discouraged me from applying. He said I shouldn’t do a PhD because I’ll be broke and it’s dumb and that he “feels behind” and i will leave him ? Last year when I was studying hard in honours he told me that men don’t like intelligent/ambitious women and that women don’t contribute to the workforce, they just take coffee breaks. He said if he had a daughter he wouldn’t let her do a PhD and that’s it’s a dumb financial decision.

He joined the airforce himself and became awful and didn’t seem happy / supportive about my PhD. He said I should drop my PhD offer and move wherever the military posted him and do my PhD there (like it’s so easy to get accepted?). I felt really hurt because I worked hard and he said my PhD was dumb and it was the problem between us. I was supposed to support his career and follow him around, while he disrespected my ambitions. I ended up saying goodbye and ghosting him because I felt so emotionally neglected and he was being avoidant. We were dating to marry and I was heartbroken and struggled to feel excited for my PhD.

I’m just confused because at the start he said he liked me because I’m smart. Also, he did plan dates and like care about me and make time for me etc. But he avoided any emotional / hard conversations and was always getting defensive so that every problem was my fault and I could never feel seen or heard. He also didn’t get me anything for my birthday despite promising to and then started asking me what he wants for his next birthday even though his bday just passed ? After that I had enough and ghosted him…

I get so sad and can’t stop crying from 11 days after ovulation and leading to my period so luteal phase. It’s really really bad because I know I shouldn’t want my ex and we’ve broken up since 6 months but the luteal phase makes me cry and miss him so badly. How to fix this?

Help a girl out , I got a balayage 3+ years ago and my hair has never been the same as before. I want to grow it down to my hips like it used to be when I was a teen. But I got a lot of hair loss from the balayage bleach and now my hair went from straight to this wavy texture and the new growth is also wavy…

Guys I’m genuinely confused whether I was the avoidant or my ex in my last relationship. What even is an avoidant ? How do I know if I’m avoidant or if I just like to have a healthy amount of space ? People are saying my ex was controlling and just awful so now I’m confused because he told me I’m avoidant and I can be a bit self-focused but I don’t neglect my partner’s feelings. He was neglecting my feelings and avoiding hard conversations whereas when I’m avoidant I’m genuinely busy with work/studies and too exhausted to make time for another human being. Or sometimes I get avoidant because I’m worried if I rely on him too much and he leaves me I’ll get hurt and I feel like I need to keep some independence or I’ll get very hurt.

I’m confused if I was avoidant or he was ?

I’m 22F and started my PhD at the start of this year My ex boyfriend (23M) of 2+ years was very upset, and had discouraged me from applying. He said I shouldn’t do a PhD because I’ll be broke and it’s dumb and that he “feels behind” and i will leave him ? Last year when I was studying hard in honours he told me that men don’t like intelligent/ambitious women and that women don’t contribute to the workforce, they just take coffee breaks. He said if he had a daughter he wouldn’t let her do a PhD and that’s it’s a dumb financial decision.

He joined the airforce himself and became awful and didn’t seem happy / supportive about my PhD. He said I should drop my PhD offer and move wherever the military posted him and do my PhD there (like it’s so easy to get accepted?). I felt really hurt because I worked hard and he said my PhD was dumb and it was the problem between us. I was supposed to support his career and follow him around, while he disrespected my ambitions. I ended up saying goodbye and ghosting him because I felt so emotionally neglected and he was being avoidant. We were dating to marry and I was heartbroken and struggled to feel excited for my PhD.

Has anyone had similar issues when starting their PhD ?

Hii ! I get really sad some days so I wanted to make myself a comfort items bag. Recently, I’ve bought some loop earplugs and chamomile tea and heat pack. I’m wondering what other comfort items I can buy for these really hard days when you are so sad and can’t stop crying or it’s been a rough day or you have PMS or period cramps or tired or whatever. What other things should I buy for my comfort bucket ?! What are you favourites ?

I’ve felt really really sad and cry a lot. This has been happening since December when my boyfriend joined airforce and the relationship slowly got worser and worser and ended. At the same time, I finished my honours degree and applied for new things like jobs, PhD scholarships, internships etc and was in constant uncertainty about my relationship and career. Now I have started a PhD, am single again, made some new friends etc. I’ve actually done a lot of new things but I just feel so sad and I cry so much. It’s especially worse around my period. I think it might be depression because I’ve never felt this sad for this long (6+ months). Is this a normal response to big life transitions or can it be depression ?

Every time it’s 10-11 days before my period I get incredibly sad and can’t stop crying. I miss my ex, I miss something I don’t know what and crave comfort. It is so extreme that I can’t study for more than 20 minutes and everything will make me irritated or really really sad. I will sleep 10 hours and still wake up exhausted and my body aching even though I skip all exercising. How do I fix this ? The worst part is the feeling lonely because that just makes me cry even more and I genuinely can’t help it because my work is an isolated, focused, lonely profession.

I’m 22F and started my PhD at the start of this year My ex boyfriend (23M) of 2+ years was very upset, and had discouraged me from applying. He said I shouldn’t do a PhD because I’ll be broke and it’s dumb and that he “feels behind” and i will leave him ? Last year when I was studying hard in honours he told me that men don’t like intelligent/ambitious women and that women don’t contribute to the workforce, they just take coffee breaks. He said if he had a daughter he wouldn’t let her do a PhD and that’s it’s a dumb financial decision.

He joined the airforce himself and became awful and didn’t seem happy / supportive about my PhD. He said I should drop my PhD offer and move wherever the military posted him and do my PhD there (like it’s so easy to get accepted?). I felt really hurt because I worked hard and he said my PhD was dumb and it was the problem between us. I was supposed to support his career and follow him around, while he disrespected my ambitions. I ended up saying goodbye and ghosting him because I felt so emotionally neglected and he was being avoidant. We were dating to marry and I was heartbroken and struggled to feel excited for my PhD.

Has anyone had similar issues when starting their PhD ?

I’ve noticed that I get sooo sleep, I can sleep 10 hours and still feel drowsy all day. Also, I get so so bloated it’s not even funny. Just ONE day after ovulation, my boobs will get sore, I’ll feel sleepy, sad and SO bloated. I’m not even joking, I barely eat and I feel so bloated. Like today it’s 6pm and all I had was some oats for brekkie and then two sandwiches and now I feel sooo bloated I can’t even focus on my study. Every part of my body feels so heavy and achy even though I sleep SO fucking much. Is this common ? Is there a cure for this because it lasts for 10-11 days after ovulation and doesn’t go away until my period comes. That means that I get 10-11 days of hell followed by another 2-3 days of hell when the period comes which is like half a month of agony 😭 How can I stop the bloating ugh. I MISS NOT BEING BLOATED.

I dumped my bf because HE started creating emotional distance, lack of reassurance and nonchalance. There was outside factors like he was extremely busy due to his new career (airforce training) . He made promises to fix it later but the trust was broken on my end and I had to leave because I was getting anxiety attacks. He didn’t try to repair. Should I reach out or should I wait for him or just move on ? We were together over 2 years and he was very mixed signals , talking about marriage but ignoring my present emotional needs.