u/Tasty-Bee-8339

I have lived in my apartment complex for five years. I am the first apartment in the complex, which is very convenient, and has caused me minimal issues. Every year, the sound of kids and school buses starts. I hear some noise, but never considered it an issue, because kids go to school. The bus stop is about 20 yards from my apartment.

However, this year it is extremely noisy, and it’s not the kids, it’s the parents. The buses start running at 6:30am to 8am. These parents are so loud. And instead of walking all the way down to the bus stop with their kids, several of them stand on the sidewalk outside my bedroom window talking. These are all men. There is also one woman who stands in the grass outside my window, sometimes talking on speaker phone, and repeatedly encouraging her dog to “go potty, Piper!”

I have been sick with the flu. This morning the play by plays of the weekend football, were coming through my windows and blackout curtains. I could hear everything they were saying. I felt like ESPN was outside my window. It is out of my character, but I do get mean when I’m sick, so I opened my window and yelled, “Everything okay out there fellows? I was worried because of all the yelling.” They did quiet down a bit after that, but I could still hear everything detail of the game.

1. I have a problem with them not being down at the bus stop with their kids. There are about six other parents down there, but still, the speed limit on the main road is 45 mph. It would only take a second for the worst.

2. 6:30 is still quiet hours. I get up for work at 8am, and ever since school started this has been waking me up.

I don’t know if this is worth a complaint. I’m afraid it will only cause retaliation and get worse. I try hard to keep the peace and ignore a lot of stuff other people complain about constantly. Just looking for input.

My parent’s have an old tree in their yard, that they know is full of bats. The bats continuously kept getting in their home, but now they have had the house bat proofed, and it cost them a fortune, because you cannot exterminate bats. So, the professionals closed up every crevice in the house, but had to do it in a way that any remaining bats could get out. So far so good. It’s been two years.

However, the “bat tree” is starting to decay and is looking kinda dead. What’s crazy is the tree cannot be cut down, unless my parents build a sanctuary for the bats in another tree. My brother just wants to cut it down without using a professional, but I’m afraid there could be legal ramifications for my parents, because they have already had a tree company tell them it’s unlawful to cut it down. I’ve been looking at bat habitats on Amazon all day, and I can’t believe this is my life.

I (52f) am openly atheist and so is my 18yo daughter. My (21)nephew sent “save the dates” to everyone in the family, including my two sons and ex-husband, but excluded me and my daughter. He is very involved in the family church, and wants to become a youth pastor. The wedding will be at the church, and they are having it on Easter weekend, which is so weird to me. Americans make a lot of plans around Easter weekends and weddings are not usually one of those things.

Both of my sons(22&23) are quietly atheist, and my ex will say he is a Christian, but has no idea what that even means. My oldest son doesn’t want to attend, my middle son says he will be attending, and my ex husband (whom I’m extremely close to) says he is indifferent.

I have mixed feelings. I’m hurt. My nephew was close to us growing up. He’s the same age as my middle son. We lived together for a while, and my ex and I even took him to Disney World with us when he was 12. On the other hand, I have so much resentment towards that church, that the last time I had to go inside there, I had a panic attack. I really hate that place. It brings back every trauma I have from being a teenager there.. So, maybe I should appreciate the easy out. My daughter’s feelings are hurt, but she said if she has to shut her mouth to be included, she’s going to be left out a lot. I love that girl.

My oldest son suggested we plan a weekend family vacation, including my ex. My middle son would stay behind for the ceremony. I like this idea, and we may do that, if it is financially feasible.

I have had two discussions with my mother about no longer being a Christian, and not wanting anything her god has for me. I went 18 months without speaking to her the last time we fought over my disbelief. And she left me alone for a few years. Recently, she has been creeping the discussions about jesus in, and instead of reminding her that I’m not taking about it, I just ignore her.

Well, I just reset my boundary- in concrete, after I got this text about my dying uncle. Of course I wish the timing was better, but I find zero condolence in her text, in fact it feels more like an, “I saved Him!” brag. I copied the text messages below.

Mom:

I just saw Uncle Doug. He is now in the ICU awake, but unable to talk and barely able to breathe. I asked if I could pray with him and if he'd like to pray to have Jesus come in his heart. He nodded. I told him to say the words in his mind and Jesus can hear him.So I prayed and afterward he kept trying to tell me something, but I couldn't understand him. After I left, I kept hearing in my mind that I should have said this or that then the scripture came to me "there is now therefore no more condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus" so I know the enemy was trying to make me feel like what I did was for nothing. But I know Jesus can make something out of my words that are just what he needed. I believe Doug heard, understood and prayed for himself. I really believe he's moving on to be with the Lord.

Me:

Mom, I love you but I don’t want to hear this spiritual stuff. I don’t believe in it, and my belief is not a choice. It’s a conclusion I came to after studying the bible in its original text and historical timeframe, and the writings that came before it. Please share these kind of thoughts with people who think it’s real. I dont need you to pray for me because I dont desire your god or his afterlife. Everyone goes to hell in someone else’s religion- and there are currently 10,000 of them. I’m completely at peace wherever I do or don’t end up, but I will never bow down to a god who chooses a plan for humanity, that includes children being molested, dying of cancer, and starving to death, when he has all the power in the world to intercede. That’s not love.
I love you and want a relationship with you, but I don’t want to hear about jesus. I have never changed my mind since i told you I stopped believing. My mind has only strengthened. Please respect this boundary. And I don’t mean that I don’t want to hear about people at church or what you are doing at the church, I just don’t want to hear this supernatural stuff, because I don’t think it is from a god.

I hope uncle Doug passes in peace. I’m glad you are at peace about it. I love you.

This is my best friend’s story, but I personally think she was wrong and was wondering what other’s might think.
My friend lives in a very nice HOA, where she has been in trouble a few times because she hates being told what to do. It’s always been minor infractions, like she painted her door Steeler’s Yellow when they went to the Super Bowl, and she got a $500 fine.

She decided to give her kid a huge graduation party, the kind where the kids stay all night and she takes the car keys. She knew it would be a nut house for a night. She wrote a polite letter, explaining to her 12 closest neighbors that her kid was graduating, there was going to be a party for one night that it would probably be noisy, but please be understanding. She included a $25 Dunkin’ gift card in every note.

Well, someone called the cops, and she got fined by the HOA again. I told her that $25 isn’t enough to buy some people’s good night sleep, even if it was just one night.

Was the gift card a bad idea or a nice gesture? Would you ignore a sleepless night, if you got a nice note and some free coffee?

I (52f)work at a small non-profit. I have a coworker (39f), in a lateral position, who is extremely messy. She leaves messes everywhere she goes. For instance, she will do a painting activity with a dozen people and leave the paint brushes in a bucket of water for days, until someone else (usually a volunteer) cleans them. If she is looking for something, she leaves every single cabinet door open. She gives kids popsicles and juice boxes to walk around with and never once has she cleaned up a sticky juice spot off the floor. I make the kids sit with their snacks, so there is minimal cleanup, only to find myself cleaning up after her groups. Every time she does any activity, she leaves the mess for someone else.

When I first started, I went to my boss about it. She said that it has always been an issue, but no matter how much they talk to her about it, she says she cannot remember because she has ADHD. At this point, I have cleaned up this women’s messes dozens of times. She gives no regard to the size of the mess she is making, because she never cleans it up.

I have taken a couple of opportunities to politely point out that she is leaving her messes for me, but she never takes it well, and actually walked away from me without cleaning up. It came to a head this week and we ended up in my bosses office. It was heated. I was mad and I said some rude things. I said she happily sits in her office, while the rest of us clean up after her. I offered to trade her jobs, since hers is so emotionally exhausting she can’t mange to wash a coffee cup. I also responded in utter shock, when she blamed me for not reminding her to clean up her messes, when I know she has ADHD. I replied with, “I most certainly will not remind you, because you are not a five year old that should need reminding. This is a matter of you being inconsiderate.” She walked out and told the CEO I was creating a “hostile work environment”, which did make me laugh out loud, I guess only reinforcing her idea that I am hostile.

But wait, it gets better… Her mother (who is a regular volunteer with us) came in shortly after the incident, and talked to my boss and the CEO, asking why we would refuse to accommodate her daughter, by reminding her to clean up after herself? The mom thought it was a reasonable ask. The CEO and my boss disagreed, but they did get the coworker on the phone to discuss further. The coworker agreed to come in and finish up her work for the next month, but not when I am there, because she feels “unsafe” around me.

I know my words can sometimes be harsh, and I do work on being better, but this straw broke the camel’s back. I dont want her to quit. I have no problems with this woman, other than the fact that she’s a slob. I just want her to stop making messes for everyone else. AITA for refusing to be her “cleanup reminder person” and laughing about it?

I just got off the phone with my 76yo mother. We discussed the new movie Odyssey and my mom mentioned something about the Trojan Horse being a real historical event. I objected, but then she objected. I start second guessing myself, because my mother, the former middle school HISTORY teacher, is correcting me.

This woman went to school in the 80’s, and has a PHD in behavioral education. She has taught several subjects including Elementary Eduction, English Eduction, and American history. Yet she believed that the story of the Trojan Horse was real?

But wait… this is also the woman who thinks Jesus turned water into wine, he raised people from the dead, and he is coming back to create a new Earth… Of COURSE SHE THINKS GREEK MYTHOLOGY IS TRUE. My mother is both educated but also naive. No matter how many PHD’s you obtain, if you are not a critical thinker, you’re going to get bamboozled.

The good news is, I was able to send her an internet link, and she reeducated herself. She ended up agreeing with me that she somehow “Mandela Effected” the horse into reality.

I feel like I understand her better now. Maybe next time I can tell her who else in history turned water into wine, and open her up to some critical thinking.

Edit: The amount of Greek Mythology apologists in the comment section of an atheist page is alarming. I never disputed anything except evidence of a Trojan horse existing. I didn’t make any other historical assumptions, and people are trying to explain to me how it might have really happened, despite the lack of any and all evidence. So do we only dispute Abrahamic gods in this sub?

I love fish n chips. It’s my go to food when I travel and eat out. I also love a copious amount of malt vinegar on my fish n chips. My husband says I can’t possibly tell a difference between various restaurant fish n chips, because of all the malt vinegar I use. If a restaurant doesn’t have malt vinegar, I’ll ask for apple cider vinegar. My husband told me it’s like putting ketchup on a t-bone. Maybe I really do just like malt vinegar, but I can’t think of anything else I would want to dump it on. Am I ruining my fish n chips with a rude amount of vinegar?

Towards the end of my deconstruction and transition to atheism, I made a last ditch attempt to red the Bible front to back, without a study guide or even reading the footnotes. I didn’t ask god to guide me, I just read it like I picked it up from the library. This was my 12th read, and I saw things I never saw before, the things leaders and curriculum told me to gloss over. This time I didn’t. I also started fearing for my parents. They are not Christ- like at all. They are maga mega church Christian’s. And the more I read about Jesus’ words, the more I feared my parents already had a place reserved for them in hell.

What a relief to realize hell doesn’t exist. The next time my mom asks me about my atheism, I’m going to tell her if I go back to Christianity there is no doubt in my mind she and my dad are bound for hell.

I want to start out saying that what is happening to snap/ebt benefits in the US is dehumanizing and abhorrent. It’s unfair. I don’t want anyone to misinterpret my post as supporting the current system. However, it’s the system we have for the moment, and I don’t think we talk enough about volunteering. I do not know if all states allow volunteering under ABAWD, so please check your state’s specifics. I am in WV.

When hearing the word “volunteer” I think a lot of us immediately think of packing boxes in a food pantry or volunteering at a senior center. However, volunteering can be so many things, and there are many creative ways to get volunteer hours in, to qualify for the ABAWD.

I work at a resource center with a food pantry. We have had an influx of volunteers this year, due to ABAWD. One of the ways people are getting volunteer hours in, is making reusable grocery bags at home, with donated tshirts. It only requires scissors and the ability to make knots. The volunteers make the bags at home, track their hours, and my boss signs off on them. We give out so much food, we run out of these bags weekly. They are 100x stronger than plastic, and are needed for people who are walking with their items. We also have a volunteer who makes phone calls for us, asking for donations or asking if businesses would do food drives. We have a volunteer who takes pamphlets home and folds them for us.

I’m sure there are thousands of ideas out there for unconventional volunteering. If it’s the only way that someone can maintain their snap/ebt, I believe we can find a way. Let’s beat this system that seems to only be concerned with taking food out of peoples’ mouths.