u/Triumphantredemption

I’ve noticed something that I find interesting about how some neurotypical people react when they encounter someone who is neurodivergent.

For some background, I have ADHD, autism, and social anxiety. Recently, I’ve been making a real effort to work on my social anxiety. However, I’ve also been spending a lot of time indoors because I don’t really have anywhere to go, and I have very few friends.

A couple of days ago, I visited my brother, who lives in another city. We went out to watch the Club World Cup match between England and DR Congo. On the way, my brother met up with a girl he was seeing, and one of his friends also joined us with another friend. In total, there were four guys and one girl.

While we were watching the match, my brother left with the girl for a while. That left me with his two friends, whom I had never met before. For almost an hour, there was very little interaction between us. I tried to start a conversation, but they didn’t seem interested in engaging, probably because we didn’t know each other. Eventually, I just looked at my phone while they talked to each other.

As they continued talking, I started to feel excluded. I also noticed them occasionally giving me side glances, and it felt as though they were talking about me. Whether that was actually the case or not, that was how it came across to me in the moment.

Later, my brother returned, and after dropping the girl off, we went fishing before stopping for drinks. Once we were there, the conversation became much more relaxed, and everyone was talking. Even so, I still had the feeling that they were trying to figure out where I fit within the group.

At one point, one of my brother’s friends was about to sit next to me. He looked at me briefly, then changed his mind and sat opposite me instead, alongside my brother and the other friend. That left all three of them sitting together on one side of the table while I was sitting alone on the other.

My brother seemed to notice what was happening. He excused himself to go to the restroom, and when he came back, he chose to sit next to me instead. That small gesture made me feel like he understood the situation and didn’t want me to feel left out.

Experiences like this make me wonder about the subtle ways people assess someone they perceive as different. As someone with ADHD, autism, and social anxiety, I sometimes feel that people are trying to figure me out or decide where I fit socially before they fully engage with me. At the same time, I also recognize that social anxiety can make me more sensitive to signs of exclusion, so I try to keep an open mind about what others are actually thinking. Still, moments like these leave me reflecting on how group dynamics can affect neurodivergent people and how small acts of inclusion like my brother choosing to sit beside me can make a meaningful difference.

I’ve noticed something that I find interesting about how some neurotypical people react when they encounter someone who is neurodivergent.

For some background, I have ADHD, autism, and social anxiety. Recently, I’ve been making a real effort to work on my social anxiety. However, I’ve also been spending a lot of time indoors because I don’t really have anywhere to go, and I have very few friends.

A couple of days ago, I visited my brother, who lives in another city. We went out to watch the Club World Cup match between England and DR Congo. On the way, my brother met up with a girl he was seeing, and one of his friends also joined us with another friend. In total, there were four guys and one girl.

While we were watching the match, my brother left with the girl for a while. That left me with his two friends, whom I had never met before. For almost an hour, there was very little interaction between us. I tried to start a conversation, but they didn’t seem interested in engaging, probably because we didn’t know each other. Eventually, I just looked at my phone while they talked to each other.

As they continued talking, I started to feel excluded. I also noticed them occasionally giving me side glances, and it felt as though they were talking about me. Whether that was actually the case or not, that was how it came across to me in the moment.

Later, my brother returned, and after dropping the girl off, we went fishing before stopping for drinks. Once we were there, the conversation became much more relaxed, and everyone was talking. Even so, I still had the feeling that they were trying to figure out where I fit within the group.

At one point, one of my brother’s friends was about to sit next to me. He looked at me briefly, then changed his mind and sat opposite me instead, alongside my brother and the other friend. That left all three of them sitting together on one side of the table while I was sitting alone on the other.

My brother seemed to notice what was happening. He excused himself to go to the restroom, and when he came back, he chose to sit next to me instead. That small gesture made me feel like he understood the situation and didn’t want me to feel left out.

Experiences like this make me wonder about the subtle ways people assess someone they perceive as different. As someone with ADHD, autism, and social anxiety, I sometimes feel that people are trying to figure me out or decide where I fit socially before they fully engage with me. At the same time, I also recognize that social anxiety can make me more sensitive to signs of exclusion, so I try to keep an open mind about what others are actually thinking. Still, moments like these leave me reflecting on how group dynamics can affect neurodivergent people and how small acts of inclusion like my brother choosing to sit beside me can make a meaningful difference.

I have a question Who was the most famous son of Ragnar in the Vikings series Bjorn Ironside or Ivar the Boneless?

I was having a good day everything felt almost perfect but I don’t know what changed; I just fell apart without warning. I hate this feeling, yet I can’t seem to escape it. Maybe, in some quiet way, I even welcomed it. Now I just want to play my favorite song on repeat until the sound dissolves into silence

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/Jt1uVHPGi4
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/k62QIqTKfD

Spoilers everyone seems to be mad at Ivar for various reasons, but I think he was the best character in the series. I liked him for many reasons, but the main one was that he was the only son of Aslaug who was truly determined to avenge her, while his brothers chose to do nothing.

My parents separated when I was a child. My siblings and I lived with our mother, who was narcissistic. From the time we became teenagers, she frequently got involved with different men and often brought them into our home. This deeply angered me.
As the eldest son living in the house (my older brother had already moved out), I would speak up about how uncomfortable and disrespectful it felt to have these men around. My mother hated me for it. She would tell me that if I didn’t like it, I should move out making it seem like I was the problem for complaining, even though I was only 14 at the time.
She often justified her actions by saying she was doing it for us because we didn’t have enough money. This only made me angrier. I would tell her she wasn’t helping us at all and that she was actually humiliating the family. Some of the men were people I knew personally including individuals I had to work with at part-time jobs and some were very young. Eventually, I stopped confronting her because I convinced myself that maybe she truly believed she was doing it for our benefit.
Now, as an adult, there are speculations that she was once a sex worker. I still don’t want to believe it, but given everything I witnessed and know about her behavior, it’s hard to dismiss the rumors. What hurt most was not just what she was doing, but that everyone around us knew about it.

Why do some girls become extremely angry or hostile if you don’t pursue them romantically, especially if they seemed to like you? I don’t want this to come across as rude or creepy I genuinely want to understand.

I’ve noticed a pattern in my own experiences. Some girls who were initially friendly and kind toward me suddenly changed. They started gossiping about me with their friends, acting rude whenever they saw me, or behaving in ways that seemed strange and unnecessary.

For example, there was one girl I asked out. Things were going well between us, but when I finally asked her out over chat, she told me she was living in a different city. Since I didn’t know she had moved, I didn’t pursue it any further. A few months later, she came back, but I never brought it up again. After that, her attitude toward me completely changed. She started acting cold, rude, and just generally weird around me. I don’t know whether it had anything to do with the fact that I had asked her out once and then never mentioned it again, or if it was something else entirely.

She’s not the only one, either. I’ve had similar experiences with other girls, which is why I’m curious if there’s a psychological explanation for this or if I’m simply misinterpreting the situations.

I stopped attending family functions and gatherings involving my parents and siblings, and I no longer include them in any celebrations or important events in my life. The reason is that they always seem to find ways to embarrass me in front of others.

When I was younger, my narcissistic mother would often embarrass me at family events such as funerals, weddings, ceremonies, and other gatherings. She seemed to do it to gain attention from others. Whenever I received positive attention, she would often react by yelling at me, criticizing me, or gossiping about me with members of our extended family.

Over time, my siblings appeared to adopt the same behavior. Now, as an adult, whenever I celebrate something and invite them, they often do things that leave me questioning why I invited them in the first place.

Is this type of behavior common in narcissistic families? Has anyone else had a similar experience?

Did anyone else have a similar experience with their narcissistic parents?

My narcissistic mother seemed to enjoy seeing me in distress. She would always find reasons to physically abuse me, often over things that made no sense to any reasonable person. Sometimes, instead of doing it herself, she would convince my father who was her codependent enabler to beat me under the guise of discipline.

I remember one particular incident when my parents got into a huge argument because my father didn't react to a complaint my mother made about me. The argument lasted for almost two hours. Eventually, my father asked her what she wanted him to do, and she replied that she wanted him to discipline me which really meant beating me.

At some point, my parents separated, but I wasn't aware of it at the time. The reason I didn't know was because they had sent me to live with another family for almost two years. It was during those two years that they separated. When my mother eventually came to pick me up and I reunited with my family, I thought things would be different. Unfortunately, they weren't. In fact, things became even worse.

My mother would beat me for almost anything, fighting with a sibling, not doing chores, or simply for something she decided to blame me for. Because of this, whenever she tried to beat me, I would run away and come back later when she had calmed down or after it was evening. This frustrated her, so she came up with a new tactic.

Instead of punishing me during the day, she would wait until midnight. She would wake me up and start beating me. This happened so often that I can barely remember a time when it didn't. Afterward, my siblings and I would be awake for a while. Sometimes they would go back to sleep, and other times my mother would let them sleep in her room while I stayed alone in our shared room crying.

Even today, I get triggered whenever someone walks into my room while I'm asleep. I am extremely hypervigilant when sleeping. I remember one time when I was in a relationship and sleeping beside my girlfriend. During the night, she got up and went into the living room. Later, when she came back and opened the door, I suddenly started screaming. She was so startled that she screamed too and ran back into the living room.

The next day, she asked me what had happened. I didn't know how to explain it, so I lied and told her I had been having a bad dream. The explanation didn't seem to make sense to her. She just looked at me with a confused expression, and I remember thinking that she probably believed I was crazy.

Did anyone else have a similar experience with their narcissistic parents?

My narcissistic mother seemed to enjoy seeing me in distress. She would always find reasons to physically abuse me, often over things that made no sense to any reasonable person. Sometimes, instead of doing it herself, she would convince my father who was her codependent enabler to beat me under the guise of discipline.

I remember one particular incident when my parents got into a huge argument because my father didn't react to a complaint my mother made about me. The argument lasted for almost two hours. Eventually, my father asked her what she wanted him to do, and she replied that she wanted him to discipline me which really meant beating me.

At some point, my parents separated, but I wasn't aware of it at the time. The reason I didn't know was because they had sent me to live with another family for almost two years. It was during those two years that they separated. When my mother eventually came to pick me up and I reunited with my family, I thought things would be different. Unfortunately, they weren't. In fact, things became even worse.

My mother would beat me for almost anything, fighting with a sibling, not doing chores, or simply for something she decided to blame me for. Because of this, whenever she tried to beat me, I would run away and come back later when she had calmed down or after it was evening. This frustrated her, so she came up with a new tactic.

Instead of punishing me during the day, she would wait until midnight. She would wake me up and start beating me. This happened so often that I can barely remember a time when it didn't. Afterward, my siblings and I would be awake for a while. Sometimes they would go back to sleep, and other times my mother would let them sleep in her room while I stayed alone in our shared room crying.

Even today, I get triggered whenever someone walks into my room while I'm asleep. I am extremely hypervigilant when sleeping. I remember one time when I was in a relationship and sleeping beside my girlfriend. During the night, she got up and went into the living room. Later, when she came back and opened the door, I suddenly started screaming. She was so startled that she screamed too and ran back into the living room.

The next day, she asked me what had happened. I didn't know how to explain it, so I lied and told her I had been having a bad dream. The explanation didn't seem to make sense to her. She just looked at me with a confused expression, and I remember thinking that she probably believed I was crazy.

Did anyone else have a similar experience with their narcissistic parents?

My narcissistic mother seemed to enjoy seeing me in distress. She would always find reasons to physically abuse me, often over things that made no sense to any reasonable person. Sometimes, instead of doing it herself, she would convince my father who was her codependent enabler to beat me under the guise of discipline.

I remember one particular incident when my parents got into a huge argument because my father didn't react to a complaint my mother made about me. The argument lasted for almost two hours. Eventually, my father asked her what she wanted him to do, and she replied that she wanted him to discipline me which really meant beating me.

At some point, my parents separated, but I wasn't aware of it at the time. The reason I didn't know was because they had sent me to live with another family for almost two years. It was during those two years that they separated. When my mother eventually came to pick me up and I reunited with my family, I thought things would be different. Unfortunately, they weren't. In fact, things became even worse.

My mother would beat me for almost anything, fighting with a sibling, not doing chores, or simply for something she decided to blame me for. Because of this, whenever she tried to beat me, I would run away and come back later when she had calmed down or after it was evening. This frustrated her, so she came up with a new tactic.

Instead of punishing me during the day, she would wait until midnight. She would wake me up and start beating me. This happened so often that I can barely remember a time when it didn't. Afterward, my siblings and I would be awake for a while. Sometimes they would go back to sleep, and other times my mother would let them sleep in her room while I stayed alone in our shared room crying.

Even today, I get triggered whenever someone walks into my room while I'm asleep. I am extremely hypervigilant when sleeping. I remember one time when I was in a relationship and sleeping beside my girlfriend. During the night, she got up and went into the living room. Later, when she came back and opened the door, I suddenly started screaming. She was so startled that she screamed too and ran back into the living room.

The next day, she asked me what had happened. I didn't know how to explain it, so I lied and told her I had been having a bad dream. The explanation didn't seem to make sense to her. She just looked at me with a confused expression, and I remember thinking that she probably believed I was crazy.

Did anyone else experience something like this growing up?

When I was younger and living with my parents, my narcissistic mother would often use food deprivation as a form of punishment. Sometimes it was because I had done something she considered wrong, and other times it was for things she simply blamed me for. She would tell my siblings not to give me any food, and they were usually happy to go along with it because they hated me just as much as she did.

She would make me apologize to her repeatedly before finally allowing me to eat, and sometimes this would go on for days. During those times, I would visit my friends and hope that someone would offer me something to eat. One friend in particular, who was very close to me, noticed that something wasn't right at home. Although I never fully explained how badly I was being treated, he told me that whenever I was hungry, I could come to his house and his mother would make us food.

There were also times when my mother would instruct my sister, who was responsible for preparing meals, not to cook anything at all. I would go to bed hungry, only to wake up the next morning and discover that they had cooked and eaten during the night without waking me or saving any food for me.

I feel like food was used not only as a punishment but also as a way to humiliate, isolate, and control me, I hated my mother for making me beg for food as a child.

Did anyone else experience something like this growing up?

When I was younger and living with my parents, my narcissistic mother would often use food deprivation as a form of punishment. Sometimes it was because I had done something she considered wrong, and other times it was for things she simply blamed me for. She would tell my siblings not to give me any food, and they were usually happy to go along with it because they hated me just as much as she did.

She would make me apologize to her repeatedly before finally allowing me to eat, and sometimes this would go on for days. During those times, I would visit my friends and hope that someone would offer me something to eat. One friend in particular, who was very close to me, noticed that something wasn't right at home. Although I never fully explained how badly I was being treated, he told me that whenever I was hungry, I could come to his house and his mother would make us food.

There were also times when my mother would instruct my sister, who was responsible for preparing meals, not to cook anything at all. I would go to bed hungry, only to wake up the next morning and discover that they had cooked and eaten during the night without waking me or saving any food for me.

I feel like food was used not only as a punishment but also as a way to humiliate, isolate, and control me, I hated my mother for making me beg for food as a child.

I have a question. Why do sons who are favored by a narcissistic mother the golden sons often seem to have such negative views of women?

I’m asking because I’ve noticed this pattern among my own brothers. Unlike me, they were always heavily favored by my mother and have maintained very close relationships with her. Over the years, however, I’ve observed that they seem to share similar attitudes toward women. They often appear to view women more as objects or possessions than as people.

For example, I remember having a conversation with one of my brothers about his girlfriend at the time. He told me that one of the main reasons he liked being seen with her was that people respected him more when they were together. At the time, I didn’t think much of it. I assumed he simply enjoyed the attention they received as a couple. Looking back, though, it struck me as odd that his focus seemed to be more on how she enhanced his image than on who she was as a person.

Another example involves one of my married brothers. A few months back I happened to overhear a conversation between him and a friend. Somehow the discussion turned to his wife, who had given birth to their son just three days earlier. During the conversation, my brother said that he could never fully trust his wife or treat her too well because, sooner or later, she would betray him. I found that comment shocking, especially considering everything she had just gone through and the fact that they had just welcomed a child together.

There have been many other incidents like these over the years. I’ve often heard my brothers speak negatively about women, express distrust toward them.

Because of these experiences, I’ve started to wonder whether there is a connection between being the favored child of a narcissistic mother and developing unhealthy attitudes toward women. Has anyone else noticed a similar pattern, or is there another explanation for this behavior?

I have a question. Why do sons who are favored by a narcissistic mother the golden sons often seem to have such negative views of women?

I’m asking because I’ve noticed this pattern among my own brothers. Unlike me, they were always heavily favored by my mother and have maintained very close relationships with her. Over the years, however, I’ve observed that they seem to share similar attitudes toward women. They often appear to view women more as objects or possessions than as people.

For example, I remember having a conversation with one of my brothers about his girlfriend at the time. He told me that one of the main reasons he liked being seen with her was that people respected him more when they were together. At the time, I didn’t think much of it. I assumed he simply enjoyed the attention they received as a couple. Looking back, though, it struck me as odd that his focus seemed to be more on how she enhanced his image than on who she was as a person.

Another example involves one of my married brothers. A few months back I happened to overhear a conversation between him and a friend. Somehow the discussion turned to his wife, who had given birth to their son just three days earlier. During the conversation, my brother said that he could never fully trust his wife or treat her too well because, sooner or later, she would betray him. I found that comment shocking, especially considering everything she had just gone through and the fact that they had just welcomed a child together.

There have been many other incidents like these over the years. I’ve often heard my brothers speak negatively about women, express distrust toward them.

Because of these experiences, I’ve started to wonder whether there is a connection between being the favored child of a narcissistic mother and developing unhealthy attitudes toward women. Has anyone else noticed a similar pattern, or is there another explanation for this behavior?

Why is it so important to my narcissistic mother that I get married and start a family?
I’m in my 20s and I don’t want to get married or have children. I’m afraid of repeating the same dysfunction I grew up with. I come from a very dysfunctional family, and my mother is a narcissist who has made my life miserable since I was a child. She turned all my siblings and extended family members against me and bad mouthed me to everyone she knows.
Now she’s suddenly telling me that I need to get married. The last time I visited her, she said she’s been talking to a girl she thinks would be good for me and wants to introduce us. I told her I don’t want a girlfriend right now, but she kept pushing the idea. She insists that I need a wife and kids. I’m left thinking, “When did she start caring about what I want?
I’m still confused why is this so important to her?

One thing I find very upsetting as the child of a narcissistic parent is how my mother handled conflicts between me and my siblings while I was growing up. Whenever I had an argument or fight with one of them, she would never take my side even when I clearly wasn’t the one at fault. Instead, she would twist the situation to make me the bad guy. She’d say things like, you’re so ungrateful, you’re always sad, or you don’t know how to be friendly with people. No matter what actually happened, I was always the problem.
However, when two of my siblings fought and she stepped in to resolve it, her approach was completely different. She would say things like, both of you are my children and I love you both equally, before calmly addressing who she thought was in the wrong. She never offered me that kind of reassurance or fairness. Instead, she would immediately blame me for everything. If I tried to point out how unfair her judgment was, she would sometimes even get physical.
I’ve always wondered why she felt the need to say I love you both equally to my siblings during their fights, fights that didn’t even involve me.

One thing I find very upsetting as the child of a narcissistic parent is how my mother handled conflicts between me and my siblings while I was growing up. Whenever I had an argument or fight with one of them, she would never take my side even when I clearly wasn’t the one at fault. Instead, she would twist the situation to make me the bad guy. She’d say things like, you’re so ungrateful, you’re always sad, or you don’t know how to be friendly with people. No matter what actually happened, I was always the problem.
However, when two of my siblings fought and she stepped in to resolve it, her approach was completely different. She would say things like, both of you are my children and I love you equally, before calmly addressing who she thought was in the wrong. She never offered me that kind of reassurance or fairness. Instead, she would immediately blame me for everything. If I tried to point out how unfair her judgment was, she would sometimes even get physical.
I’ve always wondered why she felt the need to say I love you both equally to my siblings during their fights, fights that didn’t even involve me.

I’m a 25-year-old guy, and I’ve never really been the romantic type. But there’s this one girl I can’t stop thinking about.

We’ve known each other since elementary school. When I was 6, my parents moved to a new state, and I was enrolled in the same school she attended. The moment I first saw her, I completely fell for her.

Our families quickly became close. Our moms became good friends, and whenever her mom visited, she would bring her along. That’s how we started playing together — me, her, her two siblings (a brother and a sister), and my siblings. Eventually, both families started attending the same church, and we grew even closer.

Then her family relocated, and she switched to a different school. A few years later, my parents moved to the same area, and I was enrolled in her new school. I was almost 9 at the time, and every day, my feelings for her only grew stronger. But I never told her how I felt.

After we graduated from elementary school, she went to an all-girls high school while I moved to another state to live with my aunt and continued high school there. After two years, I moved back home. When I asked my sister about her, I learned that both of her parents had passed away and she was now living with one of her aunties. I felt really sad for her.

I didn’t see her for a long time. I had almost forgotten what she looked like until one day I unexpectedly saw her coming back from school. All my old feelings came rushing back. I thought about asking her out, but I didn’t have the courage.

I would often dream about us getting married and living together. One day, I told my mom about one of those dreams. To my horror, she mentioned it to the girl. I was so upset and embarrassed that I felt like I had ruined any chance I had with her. After that, I decided to stay away.

She eventually finished high school, went to college, and graduated. I finished high school, started college, but later dropped out.

Some time later, we reconnected on Facebook. I asked for her number, and she gave it to me. We talked for a while, but that was it. I wanted to ask her out, but I was too scared she might reject me. I didn’t think I could handle that, so I just let her be.