u/Unfair_Log3531

i just finished highschool, and it’s almost the end of my last summer break. i spent the summer hanging out with friends and stuff like that but whenever im alone i just don’t do anything, and ive gotten into a slump that i can’t get out of. any time i spend at home is just being on my phone, scrolling or doing whatever. i don’t go outside unless it’s to friends or to work. it’s like when im alone life just doesn’t happen. and in my country it’s too hot in summer to be outside before sundown so from the moment i wake up until the moment i finally go out with friends in the evening, i don’t do anything besides scrolling, sleeping, maybe playing video games, eating, and finding other ways to pass time on my phone. i noticed i don’t know how to have fun with myself anymore. it’s like im dependent on other people to feel like im having fun. i have a few hobbies that i haven’t touched in months, and for some reason, starting to go back to them just feels like a chore. i want to learn to have fun with myself again, does anyone know how to start?

i have a singular beehive in my 3 year save because i just thought its boring and only gives 1 honey once in a while that is barely worth anything anyway, and i always saw farm layouts posted here and seen so many beehives with flowers around and i always thought its for aesthetics. why did nobody tell me that placing flowers nearby actually has a point?!

i often realize i don’t feel real. not in a depressing kind of way, more in a scary way. i live my life like normal, i have friends and i go out and i have work and im on summer break so life is supposed to be at peak rn
but recently sometimes when i sit down(it doesn’t matter if im alone or around people) and my brain gets quiet, i suddenly realized i am a living, conscious being around other conscious beings. i suddenly realise my eyes can see, that the things around me are real. and when i try to understand what’s going on in my brain when i don’t have those realisation moments, i realise i live life like it’s some sort of video game. i barely grasp the concept of time. i just finished highschool, but in my head i’m in the seventh grade. i also barely grasp the idea of other people being real, having thoughts and lives. in my head, when i don’t see the person around me, they no longer “exist”. if i keep up with the video game analogy, it feels like i moved to a different level where this person isn’t present, and maybe will return at a different level. like every person is an npc, only active when im around. but the weirdest thing is that i can’t even grasp the idea of me existing. it’s like im another npc. i mean i do stuff and i think but it feels like none of these thoughts and actions are actually mine. it’s just that life as a whole is something i can’t fathom. it’s like trees are not trees, it’s a concept i called a tree, and when my brain gets quiet for even a second, i suddenly see that tree as the concept, not the thing, and i get scared. but it’s not just trees, it’s my relationships, people around me, my life, and me. it just sort of feels that life is on autopilot for me, like someone else is the player and i just watch, and only for a random few seconds i actually realise im alive, and my actions come from me, and they have consequences.
it’s scary, like really scary. and i feel alone in this, but maybe it’s normal? i never had a conversation with a friend where i actually confessed this feeling, only once, and that friend didn’t relate

is there like a quiz or something? do i need to go and just try on everything?
some clothes that i like just don’t look good on me because of my body type, and as im figuring out my personal style i also want to find things that compliment my body, knowing what necklines and cuts look best. is it just trial and error?

from the moment the boulder is removed and you get the copper pan from willy, i haven’t used it once, and im on winter y2. is this normal? am i missing out on something? it just felt like a hassle to carry it when it’s not even guaranteed that ill find many panning spots so i just never bother taking it with me for ores i could easily get in the mines

anyone knows where i could buy one? i was visiting recently and tried to find one in town but couldn’t. now im back in my country and im looking into buying one for my collection

it’s really long, but i need your help
i’m graduating highschool in a minute. there’s a girl in my class that became friends with me and some other girls at the begging of highschool.
i want to start this off by saying she’s a good person, and i feel like i need to cut things off also because of her as a friend, but also because in some way im not treating her right(let me explain)
she joined a few months after we started highschool, and we’re only 30ish kids in my grade overall(small school) so when she joined most friend groups at least for the beginning were already formed. in the day she joined she seemed really shy so i went to talk to her and she was nice so i introduced her into my friend group and she was with us ever since.
in the previous school she went to before switching to mine, she was bullied for stupid things, and it really crushed her self esteem. she’s really insecure, and in our school(we’re 30 kids in one grade, we’re forced to get along) everyone is friends with each other so switching from being bullied into being in a school where everyone is suddenly nice to you, is life changing. the reason i mentioned the insecurity(there’s nothing wrong with that!) is to explain some things. she tries really really hard to befriend everyone, being extra kind and extra overall, trying to prove herself as worthy to be friends with the “cool” kids and i get that, but she’s stepping on me(and other friends) when she gets any opportunity to feel included with the “popular” kids. i have a few examples, but i don’t want this to be too long so ill give only one: in a school camping trip(about 6 months ago) her, another mutual friend, and i, were talking to a few kids from the grade below us. the conversation was really fun and we were all laughing, and she stood next to me, and at some point she was taking over everything i tried to say and physically pushed me out of the circle we stood in. it was a subtle push, it was like hugging me but i felt her actively move me so she can get in the circle and she stopped only when i was almost fully out and she took the place i stood at, talking to them and laughing loudly.
i never confronted her, i’m terrible at confrontation. i talked to the other friend about it the same night, and she said she saw it too.
this was one example, but things like this happen subtly every once in a while. i just don’t feel like this is the way she is as a person, it’s just because what she went through. this has been going on for almost the entire time we’ve been friends, and i can’t shake this feeling that if the “popular” kids gave her the opportunity to join their friend group, she would easily abandon us for them.
and i’m so terrible at confrontations. i felt this way for so long, and never said anything, because i was scared she’ll deny it and it’ll make me look like im making things up to turn people against her when she’s already struggling. the thing is, she’s also extremely sensitive, like really sensitive. but it’s only one way, if she makes a mean joke about me(i don’t care, i like this humour), then it’s fine, but when somebody makes the slightest mean joke directed towards anything revolving her, she’ll take it personally, get quiet and it’ll be obvious she was offended. and it’s okay to be sensitive, i’ve adjusted my humour around her and others can too. it’s just became tiring, because hanging out with her feels like walking on eggshells, because she gets hurt so easily, but at the same time never notices when her jokes become too much.
but that’s the problem, if i try to talk to her and cut things off, no matter how i’ll try to say it, she’ll take it way worse than anyone would. i’m one of(if not the only) the only stable friendships she has at our school. for a while i just thought of waiting until we graduate and leave to different places, maybe our friendship will kinda die out and i wouldn’t have to do this. but i don’t want to be this person, that just disappear while pretending everything is fine. last week after prom we were sitting outside and she cried and said she was grateful that i was there for her for all of high school and she said she loves me and i said it back. and i felt so terrible at that second. all of what she did to me was because she felt she needed to try so hard to make friends and be seemed as “cool” or something like that. and i feel so mean, but i just don’t know if i can handle this friendship after all those years that i suffered from it a lot more than i should in a normal friendship. but now i feel so bad, it feels like im abandoning her right before we go into new chapters in which mostly everyone would prefer to have one solid friend. but i don’t even know if im in the right or if im being selfish, and i dont even know if i should talk to her or just let the friendship die after we graduate. i don’t really want to do this to her. but i feel so terrible lately because i basically pretend everything is fine while i think about cutting things off for a few weeks now

looking back on previous relationships i can never see the problem leading to the breakup until the relationship is over. i get really attached to people, especially because of the physical touch or warmth, even if not extreme. i can feel dissatisfied about something and have it truly bother me with my partner, but then we cuddle or something and i just forget it, it disappears. i’m not in a relationship currently and i want to “prepare” myself for the next one because i don’t want to fall into this pattern again. do you have any advice how can i be less attached to physical touch and intimacy so it won’t “blind” me of the problems i’m having in the relationship?
it’s gotten to a point where i’m always the one being broken up with, never the one to initiate the breakup, because i just ignore everything that’s bothering me for those moments of physical intimacy.

i’m 18f, i have a few friend groups, some from school and some just scattered around my hometown. i’ve noticed lately that when i get home from school, or from any social hangout wether it’s at a friend’s place or at a bar(drinking is legal at 18 in my country don’t worry), i notice that my stress levels are in the sky. my body is in like a state that i can’t even explain, just stress. my brain is way too active and i tense up physically when i’m around people and i don’t notice it until i leave most of the times.
do you have any idea why am i this way? i don’t have social anxiety or something, i’m a pretty social person and i enjoy talking to people. but i just get so stressed, and i can’t find the root of the problem. there are certain people that make this feeling stronger, like very sensitive friends that get offended easily, so it’s like walking on eggshells. but sometimes the most normal friends that i have the most fun with just make me feel this way too.
it’s like a physical stress, not only mental. body tensing up, my shoulders are really tight and mentally i feel like i can’t be calm, my heart speeds up and even when i notice it happening at the hangout, i can’t calm it down until i’m completely alone. do you relate? do you have any idea why this might happen and what can i do to help it?
edit: important to note that this usually doesn’t happen around new people, only after i start to see them normally

18f

because obviously i can’t just get up and leave sometimes

this urge shows up randomly and suddenly i want to block every phone call, ignore my responsibilities and just disappear and not interact with anyone

do you relate? do you have any ideas on how i can get over it when it happens, or if it’s possible to stop completely?

edit: i mean disappear by just staying in my room not talking to anyone, not by ending