I was searching Google Maps for my friend Kevin’s address and the top result ended up being Kevin’s butthole cleaners here in corvallis. There are a couple of reviews. Just thought I should mention this local business I discovered in case anyone needs their services or wants to add a review.
Went to sleep last night just parked on an ordinary side street. Then woke up at dawn hearing beeping and seeing flashing lights. Looked out my back window and there was a porta potty right behind me. Looked out the other windows to see all kinds of work trucks and construction cones. There weren’t any signs the night before saying not to park there, so I probably could have stayed and tried to go back to sleep but decided to leave. Now I’m in a nearby parking lot feeling sleepy still, not how I planned on starting my day!
Looks like this will be one more failed attempt at medication. I’ve been on this for about 9 weeks now and have made it up to 3 mgs. It’s not helping at all. I started feeling more depressed when I hit 2.25 mgs, but that could have been coincidence. I’ve been having some occasional akathisia like side effects. Avolition and anhedonia as bad as ever. I have a Dr appt in a week, will discuss if I want to titrate back down then. For those of you that it worked for, did it take this long for you? Is there still hope?
I’m getting impatient. After a long taper I’m finally up to 1.5mg. So far I feel less motivated and no improvement to the anhedonia. I’m trying to stick it out though. If it’s working for you, what is your dose and how long did you have to be at that dose to notice any positive results? Or if it didn’t work, how did you know when it was time to give it up?
I couldn’t even imagine how one would manage this nightmare illness while living in a car. I hope none of you are dealing with this. And even after the current uptick is over I am forever done with bagged salads.
I found an old kids rocking chair and had grand plans of refurbing it, painting a cool design and making money reselling it. I got the refurbing part done, which was more work and money than I bargained on, and did a bunch of sketches for design ideas. But then the hypomania ended. So I now have a nice blank slate but all my creativity and confidence has gone out the window. I’m trying to force myself to finish it but I just don’t seem to be able to do it. The sketches are really good, I know I’m a good artist, but that part of me just seems out of reach now. I wish I could conjure up just a bit of motivation or confidence to finish. Just venting I guess unless anyone has any ideas how to get some of that spark back. I can always sell it as is and try to get at least some of what I spent on it back, it just feels like a cop out though.
I keep hearing this narrative making it sound as if many homeless refuse or would refuse housing. People use it as an argument against housing first type policies. I don’t buy it though. Most people I know would accept housing if it had some privacy and didn’t come with too many strings attached. I’ve only met one guy that actually refused decent housing, so I know they do exist, but I think it’s rare. He was very mentally ill and had been homeless for a really long time. I think people refuse a lot of the current offerings because most of the time it’s a shelter that doesn’t feel safe. I live in my car and was offered to stay in a shelter and I know my car is the much better option, but then I guess I get counted as someone refusing shelter. What do you think, are people that would refuse safe, low barrier housing more common than I think or is it just a BS talking point?
I have my days where I’m feeling like I don’t see how I can go on. I feel like I need to tell someone but there is no way I can say that to anyone in my life. I don’t think any of them really know just how much I struggle sometimes. I don’t want to worry people and I don’t want to put them on the spot of trying to figure out how to react or respond. So I end up going through it alone or calling a crisis line. So far the crisis line in my area has been OK, but then I have to do the delicate dance of answering all their questions about what I have access to while trying to be honest but not saying something that will trigger an in person response. I keep thinking I want friends and family to be more aware of my struggles with this. I even practice in my head about how I would tell them, but then I always chicken out. I think I mostly want them to know so they won’t be shocked if something happens. Not sure what I’m looking for here, just interested to see how others deal with this.
Not really a question, but was the closest flair I could find. I did a couple of months on abilify, starting at 2mg then up to 5mg. I initially felt a lot of activation, but was probably just hypomanic. So it felt like it was working because I was actually doing things but that wore off. Went up to 5mg and still nothing. So going to taper off of that and try Pramipexole next. I’ll give an update when I get there. I’ve tried so many things that haven’t worked it’s hard to have any hope, but gonna try anyway. Interested to hear anyone’s experience with either of these drugs.
As far as I know there is no recommendation to service the transmission if you haven’t been doing any towing, which I haven’t. I have just over 140K miles and I don’t think it’s ever been touched. I’m thinking of getting a simple drain and refill done. Or should I just leave it be? I have had a weird occasional slip when going into 1st gear from a roll, but I think it might be a computer issue because it’s done that for years, it is very occasional, and hasn’t gotten worse. So what do you think, do the drain and refill or nothing?
I started the beginning of May on 2mg. I’m BD2 but was taking it for anhedonia and to help with motivation. I felt like it was working at first but I think it just mostly caused hypomania so it seemed like it was doing something but that ran its course and feeling more down now. I went up to 5mg a couple of weeks ago and not sure if that did much for me. Some days I think I might be slightly more motivated, but still have the anhedonia and depression. If it is doing anything it’s really subtle so not sure it’s worth it. Just wondering if anyone has any words of advice before I add this to the list of things that didn’t really help.
I ran into someone that I knew, and did some freelance work for years ago. I haven’t worked for the past 4 years because things have been too hard. It’s been rough getting older. I’m almost to retirement age, but not yet. She asked if I was working and I could tell she was trying to make sense of why I said no. Then she asks if I took an early retirement, so I just said yes. I’ve been living in my minivan since then to keep my expenses down. Everyone sees it as my vanlife adventure, they imagine me going to all these cool places, but reality is more like bed rotting in the van in some parking lot somewhere, but at least with a nice view sometimes. It makes me feel like I’m living a lie, but trying to get people to understand is just too hard.
Going through old family scrapbooks and just thinking how things have changed over the past century. Let me know what you think.
This is one of my tells, when I’m filling up notebooks with ideas, sketches, etc. I have a feeling this is probably pretty common. I’m also older, so maybe physical notebooks is an old school thing. If not notebooks, then what? Sometimes all those ideas just won’t fit in your head and you need somewhere to put it all.
I’m considering living downtown in a building that doesn’t have dedicated parking (Benton Plaza). My understanding is that downtown residents are not allowed to park downtown, I assume just during business hours. So what do people do? I assume you can pay for a spot in a private lot somewhere, but sounds expensive. Do people park blocks away and just walk, move their car back and forth every night and morning? Ideally I’d just get rid of my car, I lived car free for many years, but I have my reasons for not wanting to do that this time.
I have been post menopausal for some time now and have seen my depressive episodes become much worse as time has gone on. I am starting to realize that hormones may have played a part in that. When I was starting perimenopause I thought that doing it as “natural” as possible was better and I avoided taking hormones like estrogen. I don’t know this for sure, but I think if I had I would be better off now. I didn’t think of this until it was too late, because apparently your body is more receptive to hormone therapy when you are going through that transition or shortly after. So I’m not saying you should do it or not, but it’s definitely worth considering and discussing with a Dr that understands both hormones and the impacts on mental health and bipolar. I’m hoping maybe this helps someone out there.
I’m only on 2mg and I’ve heard this is possible, it’s more activating at lower doses. Funny because I just recently posted how I haven’t been hypomanic for several years. I’m not even sure if that’s what it really or its just that it feels similar. I spoke with my therapist yesterday and she didn’t directly say I seemed hypo, but she did imply that I might be. I have an appt with my prescriber in a couple of weeks and I’m planning on just riding it out until then. It’s nice that I’m actually getting some shit done. Not sure how this will go, if I’ll crash out soon or just keep going as long as I’m taking it. Don’t worry, I’ll call my provider sooner if things seem like they might get out of hand. Interested in hearing others that may have experienced this with Abilify or similar stimulating meds.