u/a_me_

My daughter just started kindergarten last week, she loves it and has made friends. Aside from a handful of the kids, most kids send packed lunches, as do I. My daughter has been telling me her and he friends share their lunches and eat together. She doesn't have allergies so generally this might not have bothered me but all her friend brings is ultra processed junk food. Yesterday, her friend had blue takis, red takis, Oreos and cereal for her lunch and snack. Today she had the same thing.

I'm not overly crunchy but I try hard to avoid a lot of the ultra processed snacks. For my daughter's lunch she had chicken cabbage soup with rice (she requested it, it's one of her favorites), I also sliced some kiwi, cucumbers, crackers and homemade scones for her snack. Yesterday I packed a pasta dish, mango, cucumber, yogurt pouch and cheese balls.

I'm genuinely happy that she's made friends and she's happy at school but I cannot get over the amount of ultra-processed foods she's now consuming on a daily basis. The teacher to student ratio is stretched very thin so I don't even think they can proactively monitor the kids to prevent sharing. Besides talking to my daughter I'm not even sure how to go about it... I'm honestly surprised at what people choose to feed their kids on a daily basis.

My only form of exercise this pregnancy has been long walks, generally an hour plus daily. I took a break last week for various reasons and my pelvic girdle pan - SI joint pain flared up (never an issue pre pregnancy). I was practically limping around the house. The only way I found relief was to resume walking. I've now noticed a trend were if I don't get close to 15k steps/day it flares up, sitting for more than an hour makes it flare up. This is my 3rd pregnancy and first time experiencing it. Am I doomed to have to be on my feet constantly for the next 14 weeks? Has anyone had this?

My only form of exercise this pregnancy has been long walks, generally an hour plus daily. I took a break last week for various reasons and my pelvic girdle pan - SI joint pain flared up (never an issue pre pregnancy). I was practically limping around the house. The only way I found relief was to resume walking. I've now noticed a trend were if I don't get close to 15k steps/day it flares up, sitting for more than an hour makes it flare up. This is my 3rd pregnancy and first time experiencing it. Am I doomed to have to be on my feet constantly for the next 14 weeks? Has anyone had this?

I need clarity if I'm just hormonal because I'm pregnant and this is a typical situation and I need to calm down. My husband and I had an argument this morning that he brought up because he felt I was being disrespectful or cold towards his mother.

My MIL received her permanent residency and moved in with us. I was honestly happy about it. I grew up around my grandparents and it was a good childhood. Generally, I let a lot of things slide without saying anything or bother me as much, unless it has to do with the kids' health. My son has a genetic condition that is life threatening and will require a blood transfusion if he takes certain medications or eats some foods. Some foods are worse than others, but his hematologist and rheumatologist gave us a list of medications and foods he has to avoid. When MIL came I told her about his condition, beans and fish are the worst triggers for me from the foods we consume regularly (luckily so far he has only needed 2 iron transfusions). I had majorly cut those out from the family diet and when she came I told her about his condition and not to give him certain foods but I didn't try to restrict her diet. Her response was he will outgrow it and God will heal him. I told her he cannot outgrow it, his DNA will have to be rewired. She likes to eat moi-moi, akara and beans, I buy her the beans when she asks. Anyway, she was now giving the beans to our youngest because he asked for it, he was not even up to 18 months. She will fry akara, eat it in front of him and give him some, what little child does not like fried food? I told her to let me know when she makes akara so I can make puff-puff because he won't know the difference. Since a lot of local food has crayfish and iru, he can't have much Nigerian foods without us modifying it. This happened on a few occasions where she kept trying to offer him the food, I had to be physically removing him from her. She only stopped after I asked my husband to talk to her. The whole event left a sour test in my mouth.

Now this morning, the argument was I'm not asking her or him for help around the house enough. Because most nights I come to bed exhausted and that doesn't leave much time for sex. I'm 20 weeks pregnant and I think as adults living in the same house, there are some things that are just a given and must be done. We all know we must eat, after we are done eating plates must be done, counters wiped, etc. I told my husband, "do you want me to be telling you and your mom to go wash plates, sweep, vacuum, mop etc." I literally cooked the food, served them and now I have to tell them to clean up, I don't understand. His response was, "okay, if you need help tell me and I will tell my mom to do it".

So I told my husband I needed help cleaning the kitchen after dinner yesterday, he did most of the dishes. But didn't wipe the counters or sweep the floors. We moved into a new house that we've seen cockroaches, so I don't want to sleep with a dirty kitchen. I now had to do the rest of the kitchen cleaning, and his response is my level of cleanliness is too much, left to him he will clean the kitchen every few days - we cook in this kitchen everyday. After that I cleaned the bathrooms, no one cleans this except for me, even the bathroom my mil sorely uses and the kids will occasionally use . So by the time I got to bed it was midnight and he was waiting for me, which I assume fueled the argument. His response was I don't have to clean her bathroom. I have small kids they don't understand the bathroom is filthy, they will touch the toilet and put their hands in their mouths. I've not complained to him about the cleaning, I just do it because it has to be done.

And the next point he brought up is he felt like I'm  disinterested in the conversations going around the house and don't show joy to join the discussion. Most of the time they are talking, the conversation is mixed with English and their local language. Logically I can't follow the conversation, so I go on my phone, play with the kids, or do a chore around the house. And the other times it's gossip about people back home.

Now we also have different levels of spirituality. She goes to a church that does not allow pants, perfume, earrings, makeup, etc. So I have to hear constant remarks about my appearance a few times a week. I wear stud earrings, I only put makeup on Sundays and the makeup is tinted sunscreen, mascara and lip gloss. My daughter's earrings are not even pierced, which essentially was to appease her. I haven't brought this up with him and just let it go.

I need clarity if I'm just hormonal because I'm pregnant and this is a typical situation and I need to calm down. My husband and I had an argument this morning that he brought up because he felt I was being disrespectful or cold towards his mother.

He is Nigerian, I'm not and recently my MIL received her permanent residency and moved in with us. I was honestly happy about it. I grew up around my grandparents and it was a good childhood. Generally, I let a lot of things slide without saying anything or bother me as much, unless it has to do with the kids' health. My son has a genetic condition that is life threatening and will require a blood transfusion if he takes certain medications or eats some foods. Some foods are worse than others, but his hematologist and rheumatologist gave us a list of medications and foods he has to avoid. When MIL came I told her about his condition, beans and fish are the worst triggers for me from the foods we consume regularly (luckily so far he has only needed 2 iron transfusions). I had majorly cut those out from the family diet and when she came I told her about his condition and not to give him certain foods but I didn't try to restrict her diet. Her response was he will outgrow it and God will heal him. I told her he cannot outgrow it, his DNA will have to be rewired. She likes to eat moi-moi, akara and beans, I buy her the beans when she asks. Anyway, she was now giving the beans to our youngest because he asked for it, he was not even up to 18 months. She will fry akara, eat it in front of him and give him some, what little child does not like fried food? I told her to let me know when she makes akara so I can make puff-puff because he won't know the difference. Since a lot of local food has crayfish and iru, he can't have much Nigerian foods without us modifying it. This happened on a few occasions where she kept trying to offer him the food, I had to be physically removing him from her. She only stopped after I asked my husband to talk to her. The whole event left a sour test in my mouth.

Now this morning, the argument was I'm not asking her or him for help around the house enough. Because most nights I come to bed exhausted and that doesn't leave much time for sex. I'm 20 weeks pregnant and I think as adults living in the same house, there are some things that are just a given and must be done. We all know we must eat, after we are done eating plates must be done, counters wiped, etc. I told my husband, "do you want me to be telling you and your mom to go wash plates, sweep, vacuum, mop etc." I literally cooked the food, served them and now I have to tell them to clean up, I don't understand. His response was, "okay, if you need help tell me and I will tell my mom to do it".

So I told my husband I needed help cleaning the kitchen after dinner yesterday, he did most of the dishes. But didn't wipe the counters or sweep the floors. We moved into a new house that we've seen cockroaches, so I don't want to sleep with a dirty kitchen. I now had to do the rest of the kitchen cleaning, and his response is my level of cleanliness is too much, left to him he will clean the kitchen every few days - we cook in this kitchen everyday. After that I cleaned the bathrooms, no one cleans this except for me, even the bathroom my mil sorely uses and the kids will occasionally use . So by the time I got to bed it was midnight and he was waiting for me, which I assume fueled the argument. His response was I don't have to clean her bathroom. I have small kids they don't understand the bathroom is filthy, they will touch the toilet and put their hands in their mouths. I've not complained to him about the cleaning, I just do it because it has to be done.

And the next point he brought up is he felt like I'm  disinterested in the conversations going around the house and don't show joy to join the discussion. Most of the time they are talking, the conversation is mixed with English and their local language. Logically I can't follow the conversation, so I go on my phone, play with the kids, or do a chore around the house. And the other times it's gossip about people back home.

Now we also have different levels of spirituality. She goes to a church that does not allow pants, perfume, earrings, makeup, etc. So I have to hear constant remarks about my appearance a few times a week. I wear stud earrings, I only put makeup on Sundays and the makeup is tinted sunscreen, mascara and lip gloss. My daughter's earrings are not even pierced, which essentially was to appease her. I haven't brought this up with him and just let it go.

I feel like I'm really struggling right now and not being as productive as I would like to be. Maybe I'm spending too much time on my phone, idk. My house is starting to look more disorganized than I would like it. I'm 13 weeks pregnant, have a nearly 2 year old at home with me, a 5 year old in preschool. We recently moved from a 2300sqft house to a 4000sqft house. I feel like the exhaustion is largely due to pregnancy but I want to find time to exercise again.

I also spend 2hours per day doing school pickup and drop off for 5year old. The drive is 30 minutes each way.

I wake up around 7:30, make breakfast wake the kids up, head to preschool and won't be back home till 9:30. Between 9:30 to 11, I'm catching up on chores and making breakfast for my husband and I as well as lunch for 2 year old. We then read a few books and play together before he goes down for a nap around 12.

From 12-1:30, I'm doing more cleaning from breakfast, and tidying up and starting dinner. I then wake him up, feed him and we go out to pickup 5 year old. We get back home around 4. Which I sit outside for like 30 minutes- 1 hour so they can play and get some sun in. By the time we get back inside I'm bathing them and getting dinner served/finished up. We eat dinner around 6:30, they don't get off the table till past 7. And it's already time to start getting ready for bed. It's a long bedtime process, we read a few books, sing some songs, pray then they will fight me. On a good day they are asleep by 9pm (9/10, 2 year old will fight sleep till close to 11) and then I'm just exhausted. I manage to bath and maybe do dishes before I just pass out.

I'm about to drive myself crazy with the mosquitos. I have removed all vegetation from my backyard and that has drastically reduced the mosquitos we see and we are able to sit in the backyard. My front yard has beautiful shrubs, lots of mature trees, shade, my neighbors yard are all full of beautiful vegetation as well. Only issue is we can barely use our front door without being overwhelmed by mosquitos. My one year olds legs were covered in mosquito bites from being by the front for less than 5 minutes. Every time we open the front door, mosquitoes enter. Is there anything I can put by my front door to deter them? There is a creek less than 0.5 miles away from my house.

We moved into a new house, it took about a 2 weeks to connect the washer and dryer. We are using a washer and dryer from the previous owners and they went without use for at least 1 year. Once we connected the washer/dryer and started using them, the laundry room has a putrid smell. It's horrible and some of the living spaces close to the laundry smell as well. It's LG front load washer, I ran the tub clean cycle 3x (1 empty, 1 with vinegar and another with bleach) and it didn't do much for the smell. I then tried to clean the rubber seal as best as I could. I also cleaned the filter and emptied out the water. It still smells. At this point I'm not sure where the odor is coming from, but it makes me want to puke. Our clothes do not smell and I don't use any scented products on them.