u/dumbass_777

I AM ON BIRTH CONTROL. I SKIP THE PLACEBO PILLS.

and yet, almost all of my favorite pairs of underwear get stained by my unexplained brown discharge. WHY????????? I DON'T EVEN HAVE A PERIOD ANYMORE. I GOT RID OF IT BECAUSE THIS KEPT FUCKING HAPPENING EVERY SINGLE CYCLE AND I WAS SICK OF IT.

i hate having a uterus that can just bleed all over all of my favorite items of clothing for no fucking reason

have a good day. i hope this doesn't happen to you nearly as much as it does to me. i literally cannot escape it. i want to fucking die.

in the original script, wish nikki was supposed to just kill herself and that's how the movie would end.

apparently they only did ONE take (the one that stayed in the movie) just to see how it would go and everyone liked it! but it wasn't in the original script

i think that it's a better ending than just her killing herself. it makes the story just that much more horrifying.

what are your thoughts?

i'll admit most of these are readable but they're still funny

or maybe i'm just used to it so i can decipher her code

edit: PLEASE READ BEFORE YOU COMMENT

couple of things, because i am getting comments constantly that are all just negative and im tired of it. im also tired of answering the same questions over and over.

i posted this on this subreddit because it fits the subreddit and i thought most people would find it funny. jfc was i wrong. you guys are exhausting.

1- no my girlfriend is not illiterate. she is one of the smartest and most knowledgeable people i know (not that illiterate people can't be smart or knowledgeable, but it does tend to mean they didn't get a good education which is unfortunate). she reads and writes poetry and she loves linguistics. she likes to learn a little bit of a lot of languages. she knows a very good amount of french and she can read latin pretty well. she used to be conversational in esperanto but she has since stopped practicing that one. she is still pretty good at norwegian even though she learned that a while ago. she is currently learning greek and arabic. she also knows a decent amount of finnish. i'm probably missing some but you get the point. she also does coding and programming and has been since she was 8, something that would be pretty hard to do if you were illiterate or a bad speller because typos and writing commands to computers don't really go hand in hand. computers don't tend to easily recognize mistakes. so i can guarantee you she knows how to spell and read. also, no, she is not dyslexic and she already wears glasses. and english is her first language and mine as well.

2- no, she is not on drugs or alcohol. we are 18 and 19, and therefore not of legal age to drink, and we are both pretty straight edge and don't have any interest in drugs or alcohol.

3- she DOES NOT type like this all the time. if you think about it for even a second, that fact would make sense. if she did type like that all the time, why are almost all of the screenshots in this post of only one or two text messages each? don't you think i would post screenshots of the entire screen if this was what all of her texts looked like? no, i only took screenshots of the worst instances, and that is what you see here.

4- i couldn't give two shits if you would block or break up with someone over this. that is ridiculous and very much overreacting. i love my girlfriend and we have been together for 4 years and i'm not going to break up with her over something as silly as making some typos sometimes. it truly is not that deep. personally, i think it's really rude to tell someone "your partner is so annoying. if i were you, i would fucking break up with them" over something as inconsequential as typing badly. maybe that's just me. but i'm not going to throw away a wonderful, strong, healthy, loving relationship with my favorite person because of something THAT minor. and honestly it concerns me that some of you are saying you would.

5- why are people saying that i'm also bad at typing? i made one single typo out of all of the screenshots, i really don't see what made you think this.

6- she types like this because her screen protector is messed up particularly around the keyboard area and her phone is just a little too small for her fingers. she has a habit of picking at and chipping off the edges of her screen protector, and as it stands right now, the edge is right over the letters a and m and also is covering the backspace button so it's hard to backspace. we are going to get her a new one. are you happy? update: we got a new one now. you can stop telling me to get her a new one now bc we already did.

7- since someone asked, no the screenshot that i sent her in the first photo is not a screenshot of one of our text conversations. why would i send her a screenshot of our own conversation that she has seen before and in fact participated in and say "this is what it's like reading your texts sometimes" ?? which means, in this context and probably most others, "here is an example that i found of texts that resemble how you text sometimes". also its a different color?? the messages AND the background are both different colors from those in my screenshots??

i made sure the seams lined up and everything to make sure im not seeing it wrong. nope, its just like that.

we have this app to keep track of shifts and swap or pick up shifts and your availability is automatically set to all day every day 24/7 forever, and the only way to change that is to submit a request.

the worst part: you have to pick out of a list of approved reasons and there are literally *3* of them.

i have dance classes on mondays and fridays and i guess i can just miss them if i have to (its only my favorite part of my week and also something i have to pay for but whatever) and luckily that's my only other obligation but what if i was still in school instead of taking a gap year? what if i had another job? what if i had to have 2 or even 3 jobs to support myself and because of this stupid feature of the app i cant set myself as not available for the times of my other job? even if it was one week of having to choose between shifts at either job, that could mean getting fired.

i am going to talk to my manager my next shift and he seems like a nice guy (i just got this job last week so idk but he seems chill) so i think he'll just let me set monday and friday to only be available the first half of the day, but what if he was completely not understanding at all? what if he was the kind of manager with a power trip who thinks you should just want to put all your time into your job? actually how does anyone navigate having school or 2 or more part time jobs to support themselves when corporations constantly forget or just ignore the fact that you are a person and you sometimes have obligations outside of work?