u/fluxcapacitor87

Hi everyone,

I'm new to this community, so please excuse any errors.

I had a mental breakdown about 1.5 months ago. While it was terrible, it did reignite my passion for spiritual pursuits, and I've since been dedicated to meditating. I've been reading Yogananda's materials, especially the Second Coming of Christ, which really resonates with me. I'm also fortunate to have a temple near me that I've been attending.

My breakdown was mystical. Maybe Dark Night of the Soul is the right word for it. But there were certainly mystical aspects to it.

After my recovery, I feel a need to find a teacher to help me on the path. I signed up for the beginner material, but a monk called me and told me they couldn't provide me with the material right now due to my recent breakdown. I understand, and appreciate their being careful.

But I truly feel called to find a teacher. I don't know how to go about it without becoming initiated. I'm in the Orange County, CA area.

Thanks

Edit: this was my second mystical/mental health breakdown, within 3 years. It feels like God is calling me to follow this path. I consider Christ my spiritual teacher, due to my Christian upbringing. I've been searching for a spiritual path for my whole life, reading many books, but I feel God has slapped me in the face to basically tell me, wake up and take it seriously. Be dedicated and consistent. Meditate and practice yoga.

I truly believe the infinite sings us each our own song, trying to lead us back home.

I know, the world is so loud and busy, it's hard to hear the melody. But if we can find moments of stillness, we may just be able to hear our song.

It also helps to tune the heart strings. In stillness, especially through inner-focused meditation, we can concentrate our attention on the heart and see how it plays. Slowly, we may be able to tell it's a little out of tune, a string needs to be replaced, etc. By earnestly visualizing healing energy, light or prana surrounding and penetrating the heart, it can heal. But you must have faith it will heal. I would encourage you to read about your heart chakra if this needs work. I also encourage you to do therapy if you need it, there's nothing wrong or shameful about seeing a good therapist, who honors your true heart.

The universe can also do us a favor sometimes by tuning the heart for us.

I've experienced incredible, mystical synchrony that has acted as a massive tuning fork for my heart to fall in line with. This can be a blessing. Also a curse if it becomes too loud.

The synchronicity can help build our intuition, which is the muscle that guides the heart in finding the harmony to our song.

Finally, when we have true love and charity in our hearts, we may be able to hear the songs being sung for the people around us. Perhaps we can sing along with, to help guide this person on their path. But this is a sacred song, and you must not drown out the main singer. The best musicians are also the best listeners. Be quiet first and add small accompaniments.

Go forth my loves, with open hearts and open ears, and be still. Let the light of love fill you. Breathe deep and smile. Listen.

I've always had a hard time wrapping my head around the concept, how is someone reborn if they are already alive? But if they die, and are to return to life...it makes a lot more sense. He might be talking literally, or it might be a figure of speech that taps into the reincarnation concept.

Edit: I read the Unknown Life of Christ which purports that Christ traveled East to India to study with the Hindu mystics. Viewing Christ's teachings in the gospel through the Vedic lens adds a lot of depth and texture (for me at least).

I believe our souls extend beyond this dimension - they reach into higher dimensions, hence we have our higher self. Most of you likely agree with this topic, but I hate to presume : )

We are also made of atoms, as is everything else in the material world. In fact, considering atoms are 99% empty space, we are a conglomeration of tiny little specks dancing in a void.

But this atomic energy is vitalized by prana/qi - lightforce that sustains all energetic beings in existence. Hence, we look like little universes by the beings that can see beyond our three dimensionality. As above, so below.

Therefore, we are little universes, extending beyond our dimension, high into the heavens : ) We are StarTrees : )

And I truly believe that our brethren above, in concert with the great I AM, are helping to cultivate us, they are tending to our forest of light-trees.

Ram Dass made the comparison of people to trees. There are all kinds of trees, beyond our measure. Some are small, ancient trees growing at the top of a mountain, others are giants growing in dew-soaked valleys. And everything between.

There are no bad trees or good trees. Trees just...are.

But different trees need different forms and levels of nourishment. Some need more water than others, some need less sunlight than others, different soil, different pH levels, different altitudes. There are so many trees that require so many different types of care.

So with us. Some of us need light, some need darkness. Some of us need love, some humility, some hope, some even fear (I believe). Because we need to grow into our higher selves, but each person is a different tree that needs different forms of nourishment.

As humans our lower dimensional nature is to assign value to everything. Fear is bad. Love is good. But I would encourage all of us to view ourselves as StarTrees that are being cultivated by our brethren, who want us to grow into our higher selves. And our brethren can see what we need. This tree is drooping too much. This tree is starving for water. Let's help it grow.

Faith, hope and charity/love. Have faith and hope that what is in our lives is what we need, to grow into the beautiful, incredible StarTree that we are. And love yourself, others. Love the forest of stars.

On the other subreddits about the phenomenon, people hem and haw about disclosure. You hear the official position that disclosure is ontologically shocking, and then many on the subreddits will counter that if government officials can handle the truth, so can they.

I think most of us on here know disclosure and the truth is far, far more than the nuts and bolts. Even the biologics.

It's the nature of reality, of who we are, of our purpose here on earth, that is the ultimate disclosure.

And compared with the current reality most of the world lives in, it would be ontologically shocking.

When I came into contact with these truths, it literally shut me down. I was no longer a functioning adult. I owed the people I love this functionality, and yet I could not provide it to them.

Imagine parents no longer being able to feed their children as they are in their bedroom, wrestling with the nature of the soul and spirit and who they are and were in previous incarnations.

But yesterday, my friend (a fellow dad) who has wrestled with depression for years, randomly mentioned he's doing ketamine therapy and he's now interested in meditation :) we talked about Ram Dass and Alan Watts. I thought, what a great way for him to start learning about deeper truths, and I envied the journey he is now embarking on. If only more people started to wake up and begin their journeys, I thought.

But then I think, we can help others wake up and begin their journeys. And in fact, this is part of our mission. It's why our brethren above haven't landed on the White House lawn. They want us to be disclosure. Soft disclosure.

I'm sure there are numerous ways how we can wake them up. Gently.

This morning, I imagine all of us being happy little Buddhas interacting with our little circles, naturally inspiring others to start seeking. Loving them unconditionally, loving ourselves unconditionally. Breathing in peace, breathing out peace.

So good morning everyone. I hope some of us can be little happy Buddhas today, causing others we come into contact with to ask, "why is this person so happy? They seem so different, so real." Right questions are usually the first step of the journey.

Much love. The maps have turned blue.

I had a manic episode last month, the same weekend CERN performed its final test before shutting down. Any chance this could have affected my manic episode or even have been a cause for it?

I've been thinking a lot about how differently psychological crises are understood across cultures.

I've experienced two psychotic/manic episodes. In the U.S., the response was what you'd expect from modern psychiatry: hospitalization, medication, stabilization. I'm genuinely grateful those resources exist—they probably kept me safe. And I am grateful for my therapist and psychiatrist, they have kept my feet on the ground.

At the same time, I know that something spiritual was happening alongside the neurochemistry. For me, these experiences weren't only biological; they were also deeply spiritual. I found myself wishing there had been someone whose role wasn't just to help me return to reality, but to recognize what I'm going through as a potential journey, even opportunity, for spiritual evolution and even achievement.

When I look at shamanistic cultures, they seem to have such a different approach to these mental health crises. I feel their cultures are better at holding space for the spiritual insight and questions that come up during these experiences. And even potentially recognize them as a way to enter a spiritual realm.

One thing that frustrates me is that there seems to be a real hunger for spiritual guidance, but social media is flooded with influencers, self-proclaimed shamans, and people selling certainty. Authentic traditions don't seem to work that way. My impression is that genuine shamanic knowledge is transmitted carefully over generations, with humility and responsibility. It reminds me of the reverence many Indigenous traditions have for medicines like ayahuasca—not as shortcuts to enlightenment, but as powerful tools that require preparation, guidance, and respect.

That leaves me with a question: how do people actually find authentic teachers or healers today?

My intuition is that they're probably not the loudest voices online. I think of Paramahansa Yogananda's account of searching for his guru, Sri Yukteswar. The search itself was part of the path. It makes me wonder whether finding a true teacher is less like shopping for a service and more like a long process of discernment.

I'm curious what others here think.

Have any of you found mentors, healers, or traditions that helped you integrate profound experiences in a grounded way? What made you trust them? How do you distinguish genuine wisdom from charisma or grift? What was your journey like?

I'd love for this community to become a place where we can share experiences and help one another navigate these questions thoughtfully.

I have an odd request...and maybe this is the wrong place. I'm looking for some kind of mystic indigenous shaman I can consult with about recent psychotic experiences. Ideally in southern CA. Any recommendations?

Hi everyone,

Not sure how many of you are out there, but I think one of the great benefits of this community will be providing just that - a community for those of us who need support.

So this is me, checking in with you all :)

As for me, I'm doing okay. Still wrestling with what happened, that will take some time to process. But what about all of you????

I don't know about y'all, but I feel pretty isolated when it comes to this subject. It would be wonderful if there was some kind of way we could somehow meet up and chat in person. I don't know if that's allowed on here, but if we can coordinate monthly meet ups or something, I'd love to do that. I live in Orange County, CA.

First I want to put a disclaimer on here: I have bipolar disorder 1.

I say this at the beginning of my post, knowing it can feed into stigma, lower my perceived credibility and can potentially undercut what I'm writing here. I hope you all give me the benefit of the doubt and continue reading. I've managed this illness for the past 3 years, while being a dad, husband, avid gardener, small business owner, caring neighbor, t-ball coach, while supporting my family and attending therapy, peer support groups, and overall taking care of my mental health.

This is hard for me to share. It's very personal. And I know the judgment it can bring. But I need help putting some perspective on my recent psychotic break. I tried getting help from r/Experiencers, but unfortunately I did so in the thick of my episode and it caused me to be permanently banned (understandably). I really respect the moderators over there, and I know they have a responsibility to protect and steward their community. Unfortunately, due to my ban, I'm searching for a safe community I can share my experience with and receive earnest, respectful feedback.

This post has to do with Disclosure Day.

My break happened the day Disclosure Day was released. I never saw the movie. But I've heard about scenes and aspects, and it is eerily similar to what I went through. So, even though I haven't seen it (yet), I should probably say SPOILER ALERT.

That morning, after I dropped off my youngest at preschool in the morning, driving home I witnessed a dog who had been hit by a car. It was dreadful. We (my eldest was with me) were driving through my neighborhood and there was a couple people bent over and attending a dog that was lying in the middle of the road. I slowly drove past the scene, but it was obvious what happened. I started crying.

My psychosis seems to have spiraled from there. After I dropped off my eldest at summer camp, I went home. I was trying to pull myself together. In the garage I felt that someone had entered my body and was in control. I called them the puppet master. They were making me dance like a marionette.

I hear this body-control happens in the movie to a degree. Colin Firth's character has a device that allows him to control other people's bodies?

During my psychosis, there was an overwhelming amount of synchronicity. I didn't even know this was a term until I was at the used book store and saw Jung's Synchronicity on the shelf.

Many synchronicities had to do with animals. There was also a falling star. I don't want to get into the details of these. They were...special, and I hold them close to my heart.

I also experienced an incredible amount of empathy. I kept crying for the world, for the hurt that was out there. The homeless, the unloved, children hurt and dying, the killing of the innocent, the lack of compassion.

I recognize I might be pulling threads here. But what I went through was very real. I could use some help putting perspective on this from a community who is more familiar with the phenomenon. My family, friends, no one thinks about this stuff. I do. I always have.

Any of you out there who may deal with mental health, I would greatly appreciate your input. My therapist says I might be on the spectrum, and I hear this can also play a role in the phenomenon. Any of you experience things like this?

Both of my episodes I had highly mystical experiences. They were beautiful and terrifying. Now that I'm in recovery, I'm trying to figure it all out - what was insight/revelations, what were delusions and hallucinations.

I've started reading a book by Dr. Richard Saville Smith called Acute Religious Experiences. He has bipolar 1 and seems to be a respected scholar in this field. The book has a really interesting take on manic mystical experiences.

I want to cling to the revelations, but I also don't want to feed into a god-complex. But I would love to talk with others who did have similar experiences.

During my manic episode I experienced a lot of synchronicity. Part of the synchronicity was going into a used book store and finding a book by Carl Jung called Synchronicity (ha!).

It's an interesting book because Jung really puts himself out there as a psychologist. He's willing to tackle the acausal events that hold significant emotional weight for people experiencing them. He discusses archetypes and even makes comments about the nature of space/time being constructs of consciousness. Some of his points were also informed by conversations he had with Einstein. Pretty cool stuff.

I appreciated the book and how it validated some of my synchronicistic experiences. I would encourage some of you to check it out if you need validation of your experiences.

Both of my episodes I had highly mystical experiences. They were beautiful and terrifying. Now that I'm in recovery, I'm trying to figure it all out - what was insight/revelations, what were delusions and hallucinations.

I've started reading a book by Dr. Richard Saville Smith called Acute Religious Experiences. He has bipolar 1 and seems to be a respected scholar in this field. The book has a really interesting take on manic mystical experiences.

I want to cling to the revelations, but I also don't want to feed into a god-complex. But I would love to talk with others who did have similar experiences.

I was diagnosed with Bipolar 1 disorder in November 2023. I recently had my second manic experience that landed me in the hospital.

I was experiencing incredible synchronicity, body control, and hallucinations/delusions.

I believe in God and I consider myself a devotee of Paramahansa Yogananda. I believe what I experienced was mystical, and that I'm being told that I need to further prepare my body so I am more prepared next time this happens. Meaning practice kriya yoga, align chakras, cleanse the boys. Get the temple ready basically.

I am also a big fan of Ram Dass :)

I started my own community that focuses on the spiritual/mystical aspect of this experience. But maybe this is the better place for those kind of conversations?

Ive started to read Jung, and I also found a really interesting book called Acute Religious Experiences: Madness Psychosis and Religious Studies by Richard Saville Smith. This book really resonates with me.

One big take away from my recent episode is I need community and people I can talk to about this.

Is this the right place for me or am I barking up the wrong tree?

It's easy (for me at least) to get caught up in the religious aspect of the phenomena.

But the phenomena also interacts with our culture, and more specifically, art.

I want to talk about movies :)

It's been said that our greatest artists are those who live in a flow state, where they are swimming in the greater consciousness. This ocean of consciousness is stocked full of imagination-fish, inspiration-whales, thought-sharks, and a whole lot of other super brain-food.

Our greatest artists are able to catch from the ocean, and then cook/prepare their catch in a way that nourishes the rest of us. Think of JC feeding the five thousand :)

Movies are a delicious dish served from the ocean of consciousness. But what are movies? They're stories (duh I say to myself).

We, people, need stories. And children especially need stories, it's how children learn. And God wants us to approach him as children: "Jesus said, 'Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."

For me, it seems obvious that Close Encounters and now Disclosure Day, are cosmically inspired to help us understand the phenomena. But there are plenty of others that I think are more subtle.

One for me is Peter Pan :)

A boy who never grows up (or is immortal) taking care of other children (who don't want to die), fighting evil pirates (taking what rightfully belongs to other people) who care only about themselves and are terrified of the crocodile of time (souls trapped in 3d space/time, unwilling to ascend).

This is why I might refer to us as Lost Boys :)

What are some movies that speak to you in multiple layers, that feel like treasure maps on the path to ascension?

It's easy (for me at least) to get caught up in the religious aspect of the phenomena.

But the phenomena also interacts with our culture, and more specifically, art.

Today, I want to focus on movies :)

It's been said that our greatest artists are those who live in a flow state, where they are swimming in the greater consciousness. This ocean of consciousness is stocked full of imagination-fish, inspiration-whales, thought-sharks, and a whole lot of other super brain-food.

Our greatest artists are able to catch from the ocean, and then cook/prepare their catch in a way that nourishes the rest of us. Think of JC feeding the five thousand :)

Movies are a delicious dish served from the ocean of consciousness. But what are movies? They're stories (duh I say to myself).

We, people, need stories. And children especially need stories, it's how children learn. And God wants us to approach him as children: "Jesus said, 'Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."

For me, it seems obvious that Close Encounters and now Disclosure Day, are cosmically inspired to help us understand the phenomena. But there are plenty of others that I think are more subtle.

One for me is Peter Pan :)

A boy who never grows up (or is immortal) taking care of other children (who don't want to die), fighting evil adults who care only about themselves and are terrified of the crocodile of time (souls trapped in 3d space/time, unwilling to ascend).

This is why I might refer to us as Lost Boys :)

So, put down your phone today and put on a good movie that gives you happy thoughts (fly Lost Boys, fly!).

RU

FI

OOOOOOOOOOOOOO

We keep hearing from the powers that be, the truth implied with NHI/UAP/UFOs (the "woo") is ontologically shocking, and society will not be able to handle it.

I think it will be ontologically shocking for the majority of Americans who subscribe to traditional Western religions. And likely that means a majority of their constituents.

But there are those of us who approach life from a different religious or spiritual background, and for us, I don't believe it will be ontologically shocking.

Truth should not be shocking to those already on the path to truth. Because the true path is a homecoming - a place of arrival for our quantum selves to remember, this is our home, this is where we/I come from.

Ram Das calls it loving remembrance.

Take Christians for example. Evangelicals in particular.

I am a follower of Christ, however I do not consider myself a Christian and certainly not an evangelical. I am a devotee of Paramahansa Yogananda, whose teachings are in line with what physics is currently telling us about the nature of reality. For example, physics now tells us reality is a hologram, or as Paramahansa would say, a cosmic motion picture, or God's dreams.

Unfortunately, evangelicals are on a path that moves away from truth. As Paramahansaji says "Christ was crucified once; but his teachings are crucified daily at the hands of superstition, dogmatism, and pedantic theological misinterpretations." They are children playing with God's Holy Words, similar to the Powers That Be playing with God's Holy Technology. They do not understand because they are not on the path to truth and self-realization.

The "Woo" of the phenomena is not outrageous if you've read Autobiography of a Yogi. Telepathy, remote viewing, OBE, time distortion, synchronicities, this is all common in the yogi's life story.

Reality is a delusion (Maya), and space/time is merely a false obstacle that once the soul is ready, can be tossed aside so the true self can realize its quantum nature.

As a take away, perhaps one role we are meant to play in this performance is to help our misguided brethren find their path back to the truth. Truth resonates within. As a guide, we can listen and perhaps hear the song the Creator is singing to a lost soul, and perhaps we can sing in harmony to bring that lost soul back to our Cosmic Creator, and to awaken their inner resonance. So many lost souls are dead to their bodies, their temples are in disrepair. Let's help them clean up and restore their temple.

For those of us in the pursuit of our quantum nature, we must recognize that our body is a temple, a holy vessel given to us so that the soul may elevate to higher consciousness. We must honor and take care of this temple. Heal and nourish the Facia and other quantum organs. Meditate, spend time in silence. Go to the top of a mountain to escape the lower vibrations that are holding us down.

To learn more about this process, I highly recommend you spend time with the discourses being provided by u/Miserable-Work9192.

With the dawn of this more enlightened age, the time has come to stop the crucifixion of Christ's teachings. His pristine message should be resurrected from it entombment by Self-realization, the inner enlightened experience of truth. The Second Coming of Christ (grossly misinterpreted by most Christians) is happening now, as more of us are realizing Christ Consciousness.

I should also say that you do not have to be a follower of Christ to be on the true path. There are other paths that lead to truth. I only have one hand on the elephant.

Love to you all on your journey to truth. Godspeed

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