u/fruitinatree

Hello!

I’m looking to go into accounting as a career change - I’m in my late twenties and have worked in retail for the last ten ish years. (I do have a degree but it’s an art one!).

I’ve applied for five apprenticeships but have only heard back from one (was unsuccessful in even getting an interview).

I have a small amount of experience in finance. In my retail role I’m specially trained to manage the cash flow of the store (plus all legal documentation) and outside of work I do a bit of teaching/self employed so do all my own invoicing and money management. I’ve been researching accounting for a while and have decided it’s something I’d like to pursue.

The main hurdle is, I can’t seem to get into an entry level training role. It is something I would really like to pursue so I’ve been considering self funding an AAT (potentially up to Level 4). I’m a bit worried about doing so as I feel being able to gain practical experience while learning is the better option. I’m also worried about how I’d get relevant experience if I self fund and learn in my own time? The apprenticeships I’ve applied for have stated that I’d need a trained accountant to sign off on my training and yeah, I’m not sure how to achieve this when self funding! I don’t know any an accountants!

I’d love to hear about people’s experiences and/or any advice!

Thank you!

Hello!

So I’m looking at applying for an accounting apprenticeship. It’s an Assistant Accountant (Level 3) AAT and I’d be working for a charity. I believe the course would be 15 months.

I was interested in hearing from others who have done a similar course, how you found it and what you went on to do afterwards. Also maybe whether it was worth doing!

I’m a little older (late twenties) so this would be a career change. I understand the apprentice wage is quite low and wondered if/when the pay increases (just to help plan money for the next few years).

Thank you!

Hello! Sorry this is so random!

I make dolls occasionally and a friend has asked if I can make one of her and then a mini version of her dog, a cocker spaniel.

I’ve never made a mini version of a dog before and I have no idea where to start with this! I’ve been able to find a few mini dog sewing patterns but they mostly resemble stuffed toys rather than actual dogs.

In an ideal world I’d love to be able to find a pattern that allows for the dog/its limbs to be moved around to pose it in the real dog’s signature sleeping pose.

If anyone would be able to recommend a pattern or advice or literally anything at this point that would be really helpful!

Thank you!!

I’m twenty six years old and I’ve never had a partner before or even dated:

• my lack of experience is due to being in a bad environment until I was twenty four when I managed to escape. I don’t really want to share this with everyone but I’m not sure what else to say that is honest
• I’m worried that I’m quite old to be so inexperienced and worry how this will be received and that I won’t be able to find anyone

I don’t know how to explain this situation with my family

• Family is obviously going to come up and in the initial stages I was just going it be brief and say “I’m estranged from my family” and then move the conversation on. Long term though, they will probably want to know and it’s not a nice story at all and I worry would change how they feel about me.
• I’m also worried that not having a relationship with my family will be off putting to people

I still sleep with two teddies every night and a night light, how off putting is this?

• my two teddies are the only things I have from the first 24 years of my life so they are my most prized possessions and I cannot be without them!
• I’m afraid of the dark and need a light on to go to sleep

Sex

• I’ve never had it before and am a bit scared of it! It is something I want to experience with a long term partner though but there will be some waiting involved - I don’t know when and how to bring this up as I don’t want to waste their time if they’re looking for intimacy quickly. I also want to know if it’s possible to find a guy at my age who would wait
• I wanted to know if there were any educational resources (not porn!) out there that could explain what to expect during sex as I think it would help lessen the fear and anxiety
• I’m not interested in anything rough and degrading, I only want to have gentle and loving intimacy. Again, when do I share this and is this even possible?

Body insecurities

• I don’t like how I look. I’ve got that annoying sticky outie pouch on my tummy that won’t budge no matter how much weight I lose and I have a lot of scarring all over my body, is this likely to be off putting to a lot of people?
• For this reason, I don’t like the idea of being naked around a partner and would like to always have clothes on around them, is this likely to be a big issue?

More generally, I’m just a little bit odd in comparison to other people. I was isolated from things and people outside of the house so yeah it makes me quite naive and I guess a little stunted in a developmental sense. I’m not really sure what the right word is but I feel very behind in life in comparison to others and worry again this will not be looked on favourably.

Anyway, if anyone’s able to offer any advice that would be really helpful - thank you!

Apologies for the slightly confusing title - I’m struggling to find the words to describe it properly.

I’m having a reoccurring issue where I’m struggling to identify whether the physical sensation is due to a part or you know, it’s an illness or just my body being a body if that makes anymore sense?

A recent example being, since last night, my stomach has been constantly churning and making me feel ill, I keep having the urge to cry but can’t, and I’m struggling to eat and swallow (it feels like something’s stuck in my throat but also like there’s a force trying to push whatever I swallow back up?) It happened suddenly/out of the blue as far as I’m aware (I didn’t notice a trigger). I’m struggling to get in touch with any parts (this is a common experience and hasn’t always lead to a stomach issue) to try and identify it that way.

When you’re struggling to connect with parts, is there another way at trying to identify whether it’s a part trying to talk to you or a non-part related thing (like illness/injury etc)?

Apologies! I hope this is the right place to ask this. Some info might be a bit vague or maybe not accurate as I can’t remember much (and no longer have family who I can ask).

I lived in Canada (Vancouver) from age 2-6ish (2001-2006ish) with my family. We were in Canada due to my dads job, I know he was on a work VISA and that my mum wasn’t allowed to work and I don’t think we kids were allowed to enrol in state funded schools.

My parents separated and my dad moved out of the family home. My mum and us kids were only allowed in the country if we were with my dad/registered to the same address as him. Once they separated, my mum and us technically should’ve left the country as our VISA’s were no longer valid.

No one official was initially informed of my parents separation and my mum ended up applying for citizenship for her and us kids. We were granted citizenship.

My dad then filed for divorce. It was incredibly messy and my dad ended up telling the courts that my mum and us kids applied for and were granted citizenship whilst we were technically in the country illegally.

Our citizenship was revoked and we were then formally given either 4 or 6 weeks to leave the country. In those 4/6 weeks, we weren’t allowed to leave the house and had these random men come visit us. I remember when they came round we all had to sit in the living room and they would look round the house.

On the day we were flying out of the country, we had four men collect us from the house and drive us to the airport. We were then accompanied from the car, through the airport and directly to our seats on the plane. A man and a woman then waited by us until the plane was ready to leave (they got off the plane).

When we landed in our home country, no one was waiting for us or stopped us or anything, we were treated like any other passenger.

I remember not liking our home country and asking my mum if we could go back to Canada and she told me that we weren’t allowed to go back ever again.

Anyway, it’s 20 years on and I’ve always wondered what technically happened and whether I really would never be allowed back in Canada?

Sorry it’s so long and waffle-y, thank you for reading!

I’ve been bitten by the same dog at work three times now as of today (I do mean a literal dog as I work with dogs as my job). Spoke to my boss/owner of the business and they will not be getting rid of the dog and said if I don’t like it I need to leave. They’ve then said to think wisely about leaving as they won’t be providing a reference for me.

From a safety perspective, I think the best thing to do is leave now. I obviously do not have another job lined up but will be applying like mad to anything and everything.

How do I navigate this with potential employers? I don’t know how to explain why I’ve left my current job and why I’m not able to provide a potential employer with a reference from my most recent job. I know this is going to look so dodgy and I don’t really know what to do!

(I have been advised on the legal side of things, thankfully. I’m just really worried I won’t be able to find a new job due to no reference and potentially a period of unemployment. I also don’t know how to work all of this on a CV etc etc.)

I’ve been bitten by the same dog at work three times now as of today. Spoke to my boss/owner of the business and they will not be getting rid of the dog and said if I don’t like it I need to leave. They’ve then said to think wisely about leaving as they won’t be providing a reference for me.

From a safety perspective, I think the best thing to do is leave now. I obviously do not have another job lined up but will be applying like mad to anything and everything.

How do I navigate this with potential employers? I don’t know how to explain why I’ve left my current job and why I’m not able to provide a potential employer with a reference from my most recent job. I know this is going to look so dodgy and I don’t really know what to do!

Quick edit to add: I do mean a literal dog - I work with dogs (in North of England if that’s relevant)

Further edit: thank you very much for the responses regarding ACAS/legal side of things, I will be following advice/getting supported with this. Apologies I’ve been poor with responding, I was only expecting a few replies. I have read through everything and I’m in the process of getting documentation of everything, speaking with the relevant people, and looking for new jobs. I really appreciate everyone taking the time to help with this!

I’ve got loads of conflicting parts on the matter and I’m struggling to sort them.

The specifics are that I need to lose fat and gain muscle.

I have a part that’s taken great offence to this and has come forward with the mindset of ‘Unacceptable!!!! We’re going to stop eating to sort this out immediately’ (said part reminds me very much of Lemongrab from Adventure Time).

Off the back of this, I’ve been introduced to another part (who I realise has been running the show for a crazy long time) who is very scared of the thought of restricting our food intake and needs to have constant access to food and the freedom to eat what they want when they want (which is how we’ve been existing for basically our whole life).

I really struggle to access Self and find for more desperate moments like this I will just pretend to be a mother to myself/think like a good mum would.

The Good Mum has come forward with the suggestion that why don’t we try eating a more balanced diet (our diet is very poor) and exercise (we don’t really do this due to another part). The Good Mum is pretty sure that doing this will sort our weight out and we won’t need to resort to more destructive ways of sorting ourselves out but parts aren’t convinced.

The above mentioned part does not like us exercising, especially if the intent behind exercise is to lose weight. Apologies if these aren’t the right words to use, but I find if we do try to exercise anyway, this part will punish us in some way for doing so (somatic sensations leading to us being physically sick, binge eating afterwards or during the time we should be exercising).

There’s also several other parts who use food as a way to cope. They’re very panicked at the thought of not having their desired foods on hand and they feel abandoned.

I really don’t know how to manage everyone’s needs in this situation. I feel like if I prioritise my physical health, my parts/mental health will suffer and vice versa.

A little context - I’m a 30 year old woman and I’ve never had a partner or anything in this department.

I was speaking to some of the girls from work and they were all saying they were nervous for their first times and that being nervous is normal, but it’s not that I’m nervous, I’m actually quite scared.

As in I get panicky thinking about having sex. My brain primarily goes to: what if he doesn’t stop if I ask him to? What if I get forced into doing something I don’t want to do? How do I know that I’ve got the right partner to try this out with? What if he hurts me?

I know there’s no one ‘normal’, but I guess are these thoughts common and something you’re able to get over?