u/gold-eye9072

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I go through this subreddit and see so many guys around 25–30 who are virgins and unhappy about it, and honestly, I wonder why.

I really hope that for most of you, it's not simply about feeling “behind,” but because you actually want your first physical relationship to be with someone you genuinely care about and connect with. If that's the case, I think that's something worth holding onto.

I'm 27F, and since I was 21 and started dating, I've been very clear that I want a partner who is also a virgin, because I am one too. It's not something I decided recently or because of insecurity. It's simply something I've always felt strongly about.

And now I'm 27, and I still haven't met someone in real life who shares that preference and has also remained a virgin.

It's honestly frustrating. I live in India, where dating and relationships are already a little complicated and less openly discussed than in many Western countries. Finding someone who is my age, compatible with me, genuinely interested in a relationship, and also a virgin feels incredibly difficult.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm being unrealistic, but at the same time, I don't want to give up something that genuinely matters to me just because it's taking longer than I expected.

So to all the older virgins here who are unhappy about being one: if you're staying a virgin because you want to share that first experience with someone special, please don't automatically see it as something you've missed out on.

Maybe some of us are just taking longer to find our person.

[ Removed by Reddit on account of violating the content policy. ]

[ Removed by Reddit on account of violating the content policy. ]

Do guys really care about financial status of women they'd like to date or marry?

I meet many guys who want working wives, which kind of goes against the intinctive nature of them being providers or protectors.

I mean if a women wants or doesnt want to work should be her choice right?

I have a debilitated Saturn in my 1st house, aspected by Mars from the 7th, and I genuinely feel this Saturn-Mars tension has manifested as a constant push-pull in my life. Love, relationships, career, family: everywhere I feel stuck despite putting in effort. It’s like I’m moving, but getting nowhere.

For the past 2 years, I’ve been doing Hanuman Chalisa daily, usually once during my morning puja. I had also done Vishnu Sahasranama for some time, although I don’t currently. I also worship Maa Lalita Tripurasundari through a stotram dedicated to Her.

Lately, I’ve been feeling very strongly drawn towards Maa Kali and have this intuition that Kali Sadhana might help me break through this stagnation. But I don’t feel ready to approach Her through formal Kali Sadhana without proper guidance.

So I wanted to ask experienced Sadhaks: is there a particular daily Sadhana or upasana you would recommend for this kind of Saturn-Mars affliction and feeling of being completely stuck? Should I simply continue with Hanuman and Lalita worship, or is there something else I can safely add without initiation?

Would really appreciate genuine guidance. 🙏

I’m 27F and met a 32M on a dating app. He’s in the Air Force and posted near my city. He’s genuinely nice, respectful, and seems to make an effort.

I’m a virgin and have always preferred someone who is also a virgin. He isn’t. I know that shouldn’t automatically make someone a bad partner, so I’m trying not to focus on it too much, but honestly, it does bother me.

The bigger issue is that I’m not really attracted to him physically. I don’t find him unattractive, but there’s just no wow, I’m attracted to this guy feeling.

We were supposed to meet this weekend, but I kept avoiding it for some reason. Then he said he’d drive past my house, get out of the car, and I could at least see him. I gave him my location and he actually did it. I thought that was really sweet.

For context, I’ve dated guys before, but nothing ever really sustained. I always thought I was young enough to eventually find someone who matched my preferences, which honestly aren’t that unreasonable. But as time passes, I’m getting a little disheartened.

And the loneliness is real.

So now I’m wondering if I’m talking to this guy because I genuinely want to give a nice person a chance, or because I’m scared that if I let him go, I might not find anyone else.

I don’t want to reject someone good just because he doesn’t perfectly fit my idea of what I wanted. But I also don’t want to force myself to like someone simply because I’m lonely.

What would you do? Give attraction a chance to develop, or trust the fact that I’m already not feeling it?

I’m 27F, and I’ve been thinking about this dilemma for quite some time. I’d really appreciate perspectives from people who actually practise Tantra/Sadhana, rather than just general dating advice.

I do genuinely crave love, companionship, romance and eventually a lifelong relationship. I have dated men, but a recurring issue has been that they had been physically involved with other people before me. I find that difficult to accept. It doesn’t make me feel good, and I’m not really capable of taking the attitude of “it doesn’t matter, it’s all in the past.”

Ideally, I would want physical intimacy with only one person, who would ultimately be my life partner, and I would want the same from him. Part of this is simply my personal emotional nature, but another part comes from how I understand karma.

There is this idea that as we become more conscious and move towards the Divine, we should try to minimise unnecessary karmic entanglements. Intimacy can create psychological, emotional and perhaps karmic bonds, so I’ve wondered whether being very selective about it is actually aligned with spiritual progress.

At the same time, I’m beginning to wonder whether this ideal is becoming a limitation for me.

I’ve had opportunities for relationships and have walked away from them because they didn’t fit this particular condition. Now I sometimes wonder whether I’m unnecessarily denying myself the experience of love, companionship and life because I’m trying so hard to avoid something that may not actually have the spiritual consequences I imagine it does.

So I’m caught between two thoughts:

“If I know what I want and believe it is spiritually meaningful, why compromise?”

and

“Am I turning a spiritual principle into a psychological attachment of my own?”

For those of you who practise Tantra or have studied these traditions seriously, how would you look at this?

Is sexual/romantic involvement with another person actually considered a significant karmic entanglement in the Tantric framework? Does having multiple partners necessarily create obstacles on the spiritual path, or is the intention and consciousness with which intimacy happens more important?

And if you were in my position, would you hold firmly to this ideal, or allow yourself to experience relationships and trust that spiritual discernment can coexist with them?

I’m genuinely confused and would love to hear how practitioners understand this.

I’m 27F, and I’ve been thinking about this dilemma for quite some time. I’d really appreciate perspectives from people who actually practise Tantra/Sadhana, rather than just general dating advice.

I do genuinely crave love, companionship, romance and eventually a lifelong relationship. I have dated men, but a recurring issue has been that they had been physically involved with other people before me. I find that difficult to accept. It doesn’t make me feel good, and I’m not really capable of taking the attitude of “it doesn’t matter, it’s all in the past.”

Ideally, I would want physical intimacy with only one person, who would ultimately be my life partner, and I would want the same from him. Part of this is simply my personal emotional nature, but another part comes from how I understand karma.

There is this idea that as we become more conscious and move towards the Divine, we should try to minimise unnecessary karmic entanglements. Intimacy can create psychological, emotional and perhaps karmic bonds, so I’ve wondered whether being very selective about it is actually aligned with spiritual progress.

At the same time, I’m beginning to wonder whether this ideal is becoming a limitation for me.

I’ve had opportunities for relationships and have walked away from them because they didn’t fit this particular condition. Now I sometimes wonder whether I’m unnecessarily denying myself the experience of love, companionship and life because I’m trying so hard to avoid something that may not actually have the spiritual consequences I imagine it does.

So I’m caught between two thoughts:

“If I know what I want and believe it is spiritually meaningful, why compromise?”

and

“Am I turning a spiritual principle into a psychological attachment of my own?”

For those of you who practise Tantra or have studied these traditions seriously, how would you look at this?

Is sexual/romantic involvement with another person actually considered a significant karmic entanglement in the Tantric framework? Does having multiple partners necessarily create obstacles on the spiritual path, or is the intention and consciousness with which intimacy happens more important?

And if you were in my position, would you hold firmly to this ideal, or allow yourself to experience relationships and trust that spiritual discernment can coexist with them?

I’m genuinely confused and would love to hear how practitioners understand this.

Ever since I started connecting with Maa Lalita Tripurasundari, I feel like I’ve started experiencing beauty in a completely different way.

It’s difficult to explain, but suddenly, beauty feels almost overwhelming to me.

I could see someone incredibly beautiful, a graceful woman, an elegant man, a beautiful flower, a sunset, a piece of art, even a beautiful little moment between people, and instead of just thinking “that’s beautiful,” I feel this incredible sense of awe in my heart.

Sometimes it actually brings tears to my eyes. Just… happy tears.

And it isn’t limited to what I see. Even when I think about something beautiful, I can feel the same thing. It’s like my heart gets filled with this strange mixture of wonder, gratitude and tenderness, and I don't really know what to do with all of it except tear up.

I don't know if anyone else has experienced something like this through their spiritual journey, but it feels very special.

It’s almost as if connecting with Her has made me more sensitive to beauty itself.

And honestly, I just wanted to appreciate that today. ❤️

I’m 27F and met a 32M on a dating app. He’s in the Air Force and posted near my city. He’s genuinely nice, respectful, and seems to make an effort.

I’m a virgin and have always preferred someone who is also a virgin. He isn’t. I know that shouldn’t automatically make someone a bad partner, so I’m trying not to focus on it too much, but honestly, it does bother me.

The bigger issue is that I’m not really attracted to him physically. I don’t find him unattractive, but there’s just no wow, I’m attracted to this guy feeling naturally.

We were supposed to meet last weekend, but I kept avoiding it for some reason. Then he said he’d drive past my house, get out of the car, and I could at least see him. I gave him my location and he actually did it. I thought that was really sweet.

For context, I’ve dated guys before, but nothing ever really sustained. I always thought I was young enough to eventually find someone who matched my preferences, which honestly aren’t that unreasonable. But as time passes, I’m getting a little disheartened.

And the loneliness is real.

So now I’m wondering if I’m talking to this guy because I genuinely want to give a nice person a chance, or because I’m scared that if I let him go, I might not find anyone else.

I don’t want to reject someone good just because he doesn’t perfectly fit my idea of what I wanted. But I also don’t want to force myself to like someone simply because I’m lonely.

What would you do? Give attraction a chance to develop, or trust the fact that I’m already not feeling it?