u/iphoneuser112345

25m Florida native here, specifically Northeast Florida. I've had it with this place and I want out. It isn't what it used to be for... Obvious reasons. I'm left leaning, I like live music and nightlife, culture like natural history museums, as well as outdoor stuff like hiking and fishing. I pay $750 a month for a room to save money but I'm willing to go up $1500. I went to Dallas and OKC last year and they both seemed alright considering the political situation. I'd rather live in a blue state if I can but with where I'm at in my career it's just too expensive. Any suggestions?

Back in 2022 I met a girl at a show who I ended up becoming very close with. We had a lot in common like metal, horror, goth shit and I can honestly say those were some of the best years of my life. Hell, I ended up developing a crush on her and even after I told her and she rejected we still stayed friends. I even became friends with her boyfriend.

Fast forward and me and my ex end up breaking up (I had a crush on her before I met my ex). A bunch of my friends took her side, including another good female friend who I think actually secretly hated me but that's another story.

I crashed out on a lot of my former friends but not the subject of this post because I thought she had me. But I don't know, I just had this feeling like we'd lost what we had in common. We had slowly begun to drift apart because of just general life stuff so the thought was pretty convincing. Also there were times in our friendship where I felt like she wasn't really listening to me but she has ADHD.

So one day I found out my ex sent a text to my mom accusing me of stalking her. I SEE RED and immediately send her a bunch of nasty messages basically saying I'm gonna ruin her like and get her fired from her job. Because I got her her first adult job.

So Ex gf sends screenshots to subject of this post. Subject of this post sends screenshots to me. Not in a confrontational way just more so why would you do that. I see red again. I go on a rant about how fucked up it is that ex gf keeps getting my friends involved in out break up. She doesn't respond.

I don't think she wanted to take my exes side, but my ex and I have very different communication styles. I don't talk to my friends everyday because it's over stimulating, just talking to one person, usually a partner, is enough for me. Ex gf is goddamn yapper who talks to like literally everyone all day.

Including my former friend. I feel like psychologically my ex planted the seed of doubt if that makes sense. I mean, I understand why she would confront me if I was about to do something ILLEGAL, but over something like getting her fired? After she ruined my reputation? So one day after thinking about it I block her.

But I don't know, I feel like if I could make her see that what my ex was doing to her was wrong maybe we could have still been friends. Sometimes I think about reaching out again saying I'm sorry for how I reacted with the hopes of reconnecting, but at this point I feel like we'd have become different people. What do you think?

25M I met my now ex girlfriend on hinge and had success with tinder and bumble as well. Not to brag but it was the first time in my life that I felt desirable. 6 months after we break up I redownloaded hinge a week ago and I got like 3 matches that went nowhere. I'm just wondering why there was such a stark difference? I made sure to delete my account when things got serious with my ex so I know it's not that my profile has been sitting there inactive for years. And I used mostly the same photos and prompts. Is there anything I can do?

I live and Florida and work in healthcare. And the frequency of patients being rude, insulting and yelling at me, or us outright having to call security increasing. I work in the hood too so the aggression is more pronounced. But the violence is so bad its leaking into the "good" neighborhoods. Yesterday a guy threatened to fight me in line at a Walmart over a pack of ramen in a rich part of town. I feel unsafe. I want to leave but I just don't have the money. But I might just have to thug it out before I get a gun fucking gun pulled on me.

I know I should quit but GOD MOTHERFUCKIN DAMN vodka is good. When I eat enough, I can knock back a pint, vibe to some anime or video games, crash out, have some good dreams and wake up the next day fully rested and ready to go. After I wake up from a night of drinking I get a nice after glow, especially when I have a monster. This isn't sustainable and I'm gonna need to quit at some point, but I'll enjoy this lifestyle before I need to quit.

Not really looking for advice just need to rant

This has been quite the depressing realization. I'm 25 and most people in my area are having kids or least getting married. Comparison is the thief of joy yes I know. And financially I'm in no place to even think about any of that. Still hurts though.

I've been in relationships before, and feel like a POS for saying this but I've only ever told a girl "I love you" it's what you're supposed to say. It's not that I didn't care, quite the opposite. I'm a very sentimental person. The way it felt was more like a really good friendship that included sex.

Another thing is my appearance and my personality. I am conveniently attractive, and I dress very alt. Not too over the top, more subtle and suitable for my age. But I'm a huge nerd. I'm into things like spec evo and Soviet science fiction. I always end up attracting the wrong people, mostly toxic alt girls who stick around because I'm "different" until it becomes inconvenient. Frankly I'd rather be alone than deal with that garbage, but it is nice to feel desired.

I've stopped dating alt girls or trying to meet people at shows. I need emotional maturity and intelligence in a partner. And so far every goth or metalhead I've dealt with has been a toxic, abusive (on some level), MORON. Chudettes, one might say.

Even in more nerdy spaces it's been rough. People assume shit. I remember in college I was in anime club and eventually I found out like everyone there hated my guts. And I know it wasn't because I was rude or anything.

I'm not dating anyone right now just to reflect on things. I had a very messy break up months ago and she took all my friends. I've been crashing out over this quite a bit and abusing substances, mostly cheap alcohol because it's the most accessible where I live.

I briefly floated the idea of getting back on the apps so I had my mom take some pictures of me but I didn't get any likes. I've let myself go. My skin looks terrible, I'm not sleeping, I just don't have the energy to maintain my health. I probably shower once every 3 days. I have no one to talk to anyone.

I feel like if I relocated to a blue state or big city I would be much better off, but I don't have the money or energy to plan something like that right now. I'm working on getting my health back and I'm seeing steady results.

I really hope one day I meet someone who will make the wait worth it.

Almost done with this book. I feel a lot of you might like it. I won't spoil it. Frankenstein's monster sees how good other people's lives are and how horribly they treat him because of his appearance, and he directs his rage towards his creator and those close to him. It's only like 200 pages so not bad if you aren't a book person.

I think it would be sick asf and pay homage

I Cried

This my first time in NYC. I live in bumfuck Florida and I can't afford to travel most of the time. I had sort of the same experience when I went to Dallas, but it didn't drive to tears. Especially seeing the people my age. I was in Uber on the way back to my hotel and I saw this young couple on a street corner embracing each other with such passion. Seeing that, in that setting, with everything that's going on just sent me into tears, and my Uber was like you good bro? I told him I was from Florida and he was oh. I understand. In spite of everything, this pocket of goodness, this bastion of what American should be still stands.

I genuinely hate working out. I find it to be extremely boring and aggravating and I hate every single second I spend in the gym. Whenever I have to go to the gym throughout the week I do not look forward to it. I think "fuck I have to work out!" It's like a second job. I don't understand how people enjoy this shit. Gym bro and gym girls generally suck too. But I have to stay healthy so it is what it is

Let me tell you what happens when you enter a relationship with this mindset. The first few months might be aight. You have sex, cuddle, do things together. Then the novelty wears off. You get into arguments. You start to want more space. Then you realize that despite the fact that you have a partner, you're actually incredibly lonely and miserable. Yes, you have a partner, but you're still broke, still addicted, still have no career. Back at square one. Do not for a fraction of a second think a relationship will make you happy. Oh yeah, and don't think it will last forever. Statistically speaking it most likely won't. The break up is messy, both you and you're ex are angry and traumatized, maybe she gets with your best friend or steals your friends and ruined your reputation.

I'm moving to OKC next year from north Florida. I'm considering getting a studio apartment in Midwest City because it's dirt cheap and it seems like it's very community oriented. However it seems very family-centric so I'm to sure if there would be much to do as a single 25 year old man. What are some of your experiences with MWC? Any other parts of the OKC metro that you would recommend? Oh I know to stay the hell away from Del City.

I'm sure there are exceptions, but as a 25 year old guy this has been my experience. They don't read. Their sense of humor sucks. They don't have their own original opinions, they just spout whatever shit they hear on social media. Hell some people in this age bracket can't even watch a full movie. Or if they do they have to pull out their phone. They want to be mentally ill so badly (ADHD, autism, whatever). They aren't original, they just copy whatever's popular, be it fashion, music, art, etc. Like GODDAMN it's no wonder this is the loneliest generation. Because the real ones are few and far between.

I'm not an incel but I think topic might be incel adjacent. In my experience, every time I break up with a girlfriend, my female friends always take their side and turn against me 99% of the time. Please convince me this isn't normal because other guys I know have told me the same thing. I really value platonic friendships and I don't want to have to give that up.

Edit:

-There is an unfortunate bias towards women when there is friction in a relationship or mixed gendered friend group. However I can still choose the way I react in said situations

• I'm emotionally disregulated and need therapy.

Little background, 25M I dated this girl 23F briefly a couple years ago. Things didn't work out but we ended up becoming close. Talking about each other's trauma, going to shows getting tattoos together etc.

Then I end up getting into a long term relationship. My (now ex) girlfriend and my ex friend got along just fine. I'll spare the details but the relationship went to shit so I leave her.

It almost immediately becomes apparent that my ex GF has stolen all my friends. Including the friend in question. One day she sends me a voice message screaming at me saying I'm a POS, telling me to grow up, that she hopes I drink myself to death (I struggle with alcohol, please don't judge).

(I want to say also that despite the damage my ex did, I kept my head down and was very civil. She sabotaged literally all of my IRL relationships. She even texted my mom accusing me of stalking her.)

In that moment I let it go, tell her that I'm not arguing with her. That was months ago. Fast forward to last night and I had a dream about me and my ex friend hanging out like we used to. I wake up sobbing. Then I reflect on how much that friendship meant to me, and how she was so willing to stab me in the back.

I was civil about the breakup. I truly cared for My ex friend, while to her I was just some orbiter. My ex GF and my ex friend decided to be nasty and petty. I get really, really angry, probably the most angry I've been in years. So I unblocked my ex friend and lost my shit. I don't even remember all of what I said. I called her an evil backstabbing bitch, that I hope she and my ex GF rot in hell. Really mean stuff, I know.

After I cool off, I feel bad. I realize this is unbecoming behavior. So I apologize, but I insist that my ex friend is still a horrible person and that I never want to see her again.

I feel awful.