u/mermaidlifexo

Why does it take you longer to process? After 30 days off no contact, why do you always come back?

I think you should remember there are people in awe of the things you do, and how you live each day. So while you're doubting yourself, it's a gentle reminder that everything's gonna be okay. That people are blown away by the things you do, and how you hold yourself together. That despite all, you're still standing and pushing on through the grey weather. People are in awe of you. I think you just forgot. In awe of your confidence, your smile, and how you hold the hurt despite the odds. So, on the days you doubt yourself, please remember how special you are. For there's people who look at you to light the way when they're nights without stars. I think you should remember there are people in awe.

someone, somewhere is living their happiest moment
while someone else is carrying their heaviest sorrow;
*that is the nature of life,* seasons change, roles
reverse, and every emotion finds each of us in time,
so do not feel left behind by another person’s joy;
celebrate their light while trusting your own path,
and remember that if you are in a hard season right
now, it is only a *wave*, and the tide *always turns.*

someone, somewhere is living their happiest moment
while someone else is carrying their heaviest sorrow;
that is the nature of life, seasons change, roles
reverse, and every emotion finds each of us in time,
so do not feel left behind by another person’s joy;
celebrate their light while trusting your own path,
and remember that if you are in a hard season right
now, it is only a wave, and the tide always turns.

Something I’ve learned is that being the bigger person doesn’t always feel good in the moment. In fact, it can feel frustrating to offer your warmth and patience to someone who isn’t giving the same in return, or to someone who hasn’t treated you with the same care. But being the bigger person rewards you later, because one day you’ll look back and be so grateful that you didn’t allow someone else’s behaviour to make you change who you are, or the way you show up in the world. You’ll have kept your dignity, and that is priceless.

Hi, I’ve adopted a dog who has been in and out of my care for a year and a half now. He was had 7 homes in total and unfortunately after 11 months his owner abandoned him due to him becoming naughty and killing chickens (I live in Thailand) he isn’t aggressive at all to humans or dogs but he does bark at people and every time I tell him off, he thinks it’s a joke. I have to reward him with treats to get him back on the lead, or to stop barking at people. He’s been abandoned so many times and I really just want him to live a happy life, but he just doesn’t listen, thinks everything is a joke and only returns if treats are involved, so I feel like I am enabling his bad behaviour (I.e barking at people) even though he would never bite and is always in a playful mindset. He’s 1.5 years old now. Any advice would be greatly appreciated

I have a strong moral compass and a clear sense of right and wrong, but I struggle when people close to me don’t share those same values. I find it hard to understand how they can think so differently. I want to navigate this better, how do I let people have their own perspectives without judging them?

I want to share something personal. I consider myself deeply spiritual and I do believe in God, but I don’t follow a specific religion. Every full moon and new moon, I palo santo and sage my house, and I write out my manifestations. But I also struggle with my brain sometimes doesn’t fully believe, even when I want it to. I’d love to know if others have experienced that push and pull and how you keep going despite it?

Observation: Every morning, a small ritual. Ryan Holiday’s words arrive like light through a window, each page a mirror held up to the day ahead. The Daily Stoic isn’t read so much as inhabited, you don’t just learn philosophy, you live it, one meditation at a time. There’s something sacred about sitting with these ancient voices before the noise begins, letting Marcus Aurelius and Epictetus whisper their steady wisdom into the chaos. It rewires you slowly, quietly. Not with thunder, but with the gentle persistence of water on stone. The book doesn’t promise enlightenment, only clarity. And maybe that’s enough

Observation: Every morning, a small ritual. Ryan Holiday’s words arrive like light through a window, each page a mirror held up to the day ahead. The Daily Stoic isn’t read so much as inhabited, you don’t just learn philosophy, you live it, one meditation at a time. There’s something sacred about sitting with these ancient voices before the noise begins, letting Marcus Aurelius and Epictetus whisper their steady wisdom into the chaos. It rewires you slowly, quietly. Not with thunder, but with the gentle persistence of water on stone. The book doesn’t promise enlightenment, only clarity. And maybe that’s enough

I’m struggling with my ex who picks and chooses when he wants to be with me. He’s been unfaithful by downloading dating apps while we were in a relationship - (31M) and me (31F) I forgave him because this is his first ever serious relationship. So I’ve used his lack experience and emotional intelligence on me being his first partner. I do have a temper, and get really angry and say nasty things, which I need to get better at, but I feel like he constantly gaslights me in my reactions to his whiplash and disrespect and disregard, each time I am the one apologising where I feel he takes accountability only when he wants to mend things then just wants to do another disappearing act. I know I’m old enough and wise enough to walk away at this point, it hasn’t been healthy between him and I the last 6 months, but I see so much potential in who he can be and I do feel guilt I can be so spiteful when I am hurt and angry. But they say the biggest form of manipulation is them blaming you for your reaction to their disrespect. So I’m constantly battling in my head.

Question for people who dive in Koh Tao:
I’ve done several dives but never got certified, and I’m planning to finally do my Open Water course there. I live in Koh Samui so closet option.
My biggest issue is poor visibility, I really prefer clear water (of course)
Between August and September, which month usually has better conditions?
Monsoon in Koh Samui, is Oct/Nov but I’m not too sure about Koh Tao? Can you tell me your experiences of diving there in August or sept?

The first thing I noticed about Koh Samui is that it has perfected the art of appearing relaxed while being quietly chaotic underneath. It is an island that sells serenity as a lifestyle, while simultaneously operating on a logic that suggests nobody is entirely in charge.

I arrived with the grand intention of doing absolutely nothing, which sounds easy until you realise genuine idleness requires commitment, discipline, and a near total rejection of guilt.

What follows is an observation from a woman, who’s is awe of dogs and Thailand.

The Hierarchy of the Beach Dog

There is a highly sophisticated and completely unspoken social order among the dogs of Koh Samui. Not the pampered villa dogs with imported collars, but the beach dogs sun faded creatures who look as if they have spent years marinating in salt, sand, and indifference.

I watched one particularly weathered specimen, a dog with the build of a retired boxer and the expression of a man who has stopped checking emails, establish total authority over an entire stretch of Chaweng Beach simply by sleeping in the middle of a footpath.

He didn’t bark. He didn’t move. He merely occupied space with such absolute conviction that tourists carrying smoothies, hotel staff with luggage carts, and overly enthusiastic children instinctively diverted around him.

Occasionally, he opened one eye, assessed the situation, and returned to sleep with the heavy resignation of leadership. It is a level of personal authority I have spent most of my adult life failing to achieve.

The Symphony of the Scooter

If you sit still long enough, you realise the scooter is not transportation on Koh Samui. It is infrastructure. It is bloodstream. It is religion.

They do not ride scooters here so much as become one with them.

I watched a family of four navigating a steep bend near Lamai: father driving, mother side, saddle on the back, one child wedged in front, another somehow balanced behind, all moving uphill with the calm confidence of people who have made peace with physics.

The sound is constant a high, nasal buzzing that fills every road, lane, and shortcut. At first it feels intrusive. Eventually it becomes atmospheric, like cicadas or waves.

And yet there is choreography in the madness. Nobody appears to indicate. Mirrors seem decorative. Helmets are interpreted creatively. Still, collisions remain surprisingly rare.

The Monks and the Morning Heat

Before the beach clubs start pumping bass and before the first smoothie bowl is photographed for social media, the island belongs to a different rhythm entirely.

At an hour no holidaymaker should reasonably witness, the monks appear.

They move quietly along the roadside in saffron robes, barefoot against warming concrete, collecting alms. The roads are calm. The air is still. Even the dogs seem less interested in barking.

Locals wait for them with rice, fruit, and prepared food, offering each item with a quiet reverence that makes you reassess your own spiritual condition.

The monks accept everything without ceremony, without performance. Just presence.

The Aromatic Assault

To exist in Koh Samui is to accept that your nose will never be bored.

The island assaults the senses without warning or apology.

One moment, the breeze carries frangipani, coconut oil, sea salt, and charcoal grilled satay an aroma so perfect it feels artificially engineered.

Then the wind shifts.

Suddenly you are inhaling warm diesel fumes, fish sauce, damp drains, and something biological that has been left in the sun far longer than was wise.

The contrast is extraordinary.

There is a woman near Fisherman’s Village working a grill with the focus of a military strategist. Garlic, chilli, lime, and smoke rise around her in waves so powerful they seem to bypass the nose entirely and go straight to the soul.

The smells of Koh Samui do not politely introduce themselves. They arrive like uninvited relatives and take over the house.

The Illusion of Scheduling

Perhaps the most striking thing about Koh Samui is its total refusal to acknowledge urgency.

I watched a man repairing a longtail boat engine by the pier. He approached the task with the pace of someone assembling a puzzle he had no emotional investment in finishing.

He tightened one bolt.

Then he stopped to smoke.

Then he stared at the engine for several minutes.

Then he wandered off to drink iced tea and chat with another man who appeared to have no official role in the repair whatsoever.

Then he returned and loosened the same bolt.

This continued for over an hour.

In London, this would trigger visible stress, raised voices, passive aggression, and at least one deeply sarcastic comment. Here, nobody seemed concerned.

The boat would leave when it left.

Time on Koh Samui is not linear. It stretches. It bends. It dissolves in heat and humidity.

At first, this is maddening.

Then something shifts.

You realise the world does not end because something starts twenty minutes late. You realise not every moment requires optimisation. You realise sitting under a fan on a plastic chair, watching waves and scooters and dogs and people drift past, may not be laziness at all.

It may, in fact, be the closest thing to wisdom.

I’ve traveled all around Thailand and I have to say, I can’t think of a better island to live on. Everything is accessible here but maybe I haven’t spent enough time anywhere else? Where feels like home to you as an expat? Where do live and what feels like home to you?