u/okbirdy

My parents say that when I was little, I used to point at the wall in their bedroom and say, “Make it go away!” while crying, but they could never see anything there. I was 2 when we moved to this house and don’t remember what I might have seen that would have made me so scared. Has anyone else experienced this and successfully remembered what they saw? I lived there for the following 16 years and never really experienced anything paranormal.

I recently moved and got a new job, but the same problems and reasons why I left the old places are popping up again quickly.

I don’t feel truly safe in the space I’m living in, and I don’t feel truly understood or heard by anyone in my workplace/life, honestly.

How do I heal this? I wanted to move away from this city, which is where I’ve grown up and lived for the past 27 years, but spent 7+ months debating and applying to jobs in other cities, but nothing felt right. I feel discouraged and a bit hopeless at this point.

I’m trying to sell a Subaru Baja bike rack (made by Yakima for Subaru) but am not getting any traction locally on FB Marketplace or Craigslist. Where else could I post to advertise something like that? Would be willing to drive to meet someone but I’m located in Ohio.

My mechanic recently put refilled and put dye in my AC system and told me it would last the whole summer because it was a slow leak, but not even 2 weeks later it was completely empty. I told him that this would happen because I’ve refilled it myself, but he said I must have done it wrong. I’m frustrated with this shop always being incorrect and am not going back, so I’d like to see if I can find the leak myself, but don’t know where to check. It’s been a couple weeks since it went out again, so would I even be able to see the dye anymore? I went out and checked under the hood with a UV light a couple days after it ran empty and couldn’t see anything, but don’t know if I was even looking in the right place.

There are three things I’d (27F) like to work on correcting in the gym, and I’ve always wanted to get into weights seriously but have always lacked the confidence. They are:

1. Upper-crossed syndrome
2. Anterior pelvic tilt
3. Weak right ankle/foot

So basically, strengthening pecs/shoulders, core and hips, and legs. I was told to do unilateral exercises to help with my ankle. I also just generally want to feel more strong and fit at this point in my life.

How should I be splitting these up at the gym? How many days a week should I start with for each area? I walk with a weighted vest a couple times a week, try to do at least an hour of walking every day and do yoga a few times a week and follow YouTube pilates videos sometimes, but that’s about the extent of my activity currently. I plan to increase cardio and also am getting into rollerblading, but am at a loss for where to start with weights. Any help?

A couple years ago, I decided I wanted to explore bdsm some more to try to help with my ptsd, but ended up not trusting my intuition and got into a really bad connection with a guy who claimed to be a dom, but in hindsight obviously saw me as a young naive girl who would be easy to manipulate. I did a lot of things I was uncomfortable with and felt like I couldn’t say no. When I did end things, it was extremely scary.

I still sort of want a relationship with some elements of bdsm in the future, but have a lot of trauma from those experiences and haven’t dated anyone long-term or even had sex since then. Truthfully, it just made my ptsd symptoms much worse. I’m left wondering if anyone else has gone through this and had a redeeming relationship afterwards? Or should I just leave elements of bdsm out of my life even though I feel pulled to them to avoid more trauma?

Is it common for anyone else to have clients mention offhand during a booking that someone else might be home during a visit? I have been sitting for a few years now and had never run into any appointments like this, but in the past months, it’s come up numerous times for both cats and dogs. Some family member I haven’t met will be home, hanging out, watching tv, doing yard work, or sleeping, and I’m expected to take care of the animals while they’re there. I don’t mind it so much, but I’m a generally awkward person and would just rather know ahead of time if someone else will be there so I can mentally prepare myself for interaction with another human, and honestly I like Rover because it keeps my human contact to a minimum lol. I don’t feel like I can be myself so much around another person I’ve never met before.

I’ve dealt with a lot of stored trauma in my body over the past few years, and chiropractics and yoga with mindfulness has helped a lot, but the entire right side of my body has been super sore and tight for almost the past year. I stretch and walk and do what I can to help, but when I wake up in the morning, it’s bad again. I have recently started meditating again to help clear my chakras and heal more deeply, and when I get really deep into meditation, my entire right leg will start violently shaking from the hip down and I can’t really control it. Is this a sign of trauma clearing from the body? What else can I do to encourage the process?

I recently bought roller blades to practice after not skating for over 15 years, and I’m looking for a large flat smooth surface to get back into the swing of things. Fairhaven Church in Kettering is the best spot I’ve found so far, but does anyone else have any suggestions? I live in Kettering but am willing to drive.

In the first part of my life, I gave into gossip and got into bad friendships with toxic people very easily because my parents modeled it and I honestly didn’t know any better. However, in the past few years, I’ve started to prioritize boundaries, my own values, and living in a way that makes me feel good; in the process, I’ve lost a lot of connections and relationships. It doesn’t bother me, and sometimes it does get lonely, but I enjoy my own company and would rather be alone than feel lonely around others and lower my vibration.

This year, I made a new friend from work, and everything seemed great at first. However, after we hung out a couple times, she seemed to bring up other coworkers a lot and I felt pulled into talking about them as well. I thought we were getting together to talk about life and hang out, but it ended up just being gossip about her family, people I don’t even know, and some coworkers who are arguably annoying, but not worth talking about. She also seemed to want to make assumptions about my past and family. Afterward I felt a little guilty for feeling pulled back to my old ways and don’t really want to continue the friendship. Is it possible to find friends who don’t gossip? I want to have hope that I might find a positive friend group someday, but is it just a given that people talk about others behind their backs?

I currently live in the US and met someone earlier this year living in Germany who recommended I get a job at a US Military base overseas because I would like to move out of the country. I have experience as a teacher and applied to a few civilian positions in Germany, but was never contacted because I live in the US. Is it possible for a single woman to even get a job at an overseas base, or do they only pull from families of military currently stationed there and people who are already there with a work visa? Am I wasting my time, or has anyone else successfully done this?

Earlier this year I met someone by chance on an online game I like to play sometimes back from when I was a kid. We hit it off right away and became friends, started talking more seriously, etc. He lives across the world and wanted to spend a lot of time together texting, calling, communicating. I liked him but at the time was extremely overburdened with work, the logistics of our situation, and trying to figure out a way to meet in person, and the constant communication was only adding to the stress.

He mentioned that he and his sister had talked and he had told her about me, but also that he calls her “fat” and “ugly” etc sometimes jokingly on the phone (because they live in different countries). He’s 26 and she’s a bit older and he said that she told him that that hurts her feelings when he says these things, but he laughed while retelling the story and said “he didn’t care.” It really put me off of him at the time, but I also don’t have a close relationship with my brother and am not sure if this is just normal with little brothers? I saw photos of her and she’s gorgeous! I ended up ending the relationship not long after, for a few other unmentioned reasons too, without really giving a reason why. I wished him well and he did the same eventually.

Lately I’m thinking about him a lot and wondering if it was a hasty decision, or if this was a red flag and I did the right thing.

Or just burnt out? I was an elementary teacher for five years and this past year really took a big toll on my nervous system. I’ve decided this was my last year and have been done teaching for three weeks now though, but still don’t feel any better. I’ve been walking almost every day, doing yoga and Pilates, trying to eat healthy and do activities I used to love, but feel almost worse, if anything. I am isolated without any true relationships in my life which probably doesn’t help, but at this point am not sure what to do to connect with others when I don’t even feel like going to buy groceries. I smoke weed daily and am planning on quitting this week because I’ve noticed it’s not helping, but I know that won’t help my mood immediately. PTSD has made it hard for me to trust anyone and I just feel directionless. Has anyone moved on from this?

I feel like I’m at a huge tower moment in my life and at the start of a new cycle, but don’t know at all what it holds for me. My job just ended and I’ve realized I don’t want to be a teacher anymore, and I’m about to go month-to-month on my apartment lease with the hopes of moving this summer. I’m just having so much trouble deciding what I actually want!

I feel immensely burnt out, and I thought that I would feel better after three weeks of not working so far, but I’ve tried meditating every day, doing chakra cleansing, yoga, doing things I used to love, etc and almost feel even worse. I want to take a vacation but am not sure if I can afford it, lol. Making decisions about anything just seems so difficult right now. Do I need to release something? Any advice to get past this hurdle?

I’m 27F, single with a cat and dog, and ready for a change. My goal is to move somewhere overseas (either for a masters or job) in a year, but for the moment, I’m going month-to-month on my lease here in the Midwest while I decide where to move in the meantime. I live thirty minutes from where I was born and raised and have always wanted to leave the state, but am struggling to pick a place for the next year while I figure out an international move.

I lived in Orlando for a summer during college and really disliked it, but have always loved the ocean. It would be nice to be near a coast but everywhere I look into seems crowded and expensive, obviously. My rent is cheap at the moment but for many reasons, I want to move out of my current complex and figured I might as well take the chance to go out of state. I’ve considered Eugene, Oregon, somewhere near a Carolina coast, and along the Gulf coast in Florida, but none of them feel “right.” I love being outdoors, walking and hiking, would prefer someplace that doesn’t get a ton of snow after this past winter. I have family in Maine and on the Atlantic coast in Florida so I’d like to avoid those if possible. I feel ready to leave the nest, but am not sure where to fly! Any suggestions?