u/organic_freak

My husband and I have really started trying to become more involved in church since having our son (9m) but I’ve really been struggling finding other moms I can really relate with at all. I’m pretty “crunchy” and really weird about my baby doing certain things others do. I really got to learn more about a lot of the women in our group at a event this weekend and they were letting their babies crawl all over the smelly stained church carpet and touch each other with snot going down their face and I was so uncomfortable. I haven’t let my son go to the nursery for many reasons that I won’t get into but they all do. They also talk about a lot of the products I use like they are too bougie for them and use things I would never use on my baby. For instance, I use everything free and clear, no questionable chemicals or scents. I also make his baby food and exclusively breastfeed. I don’t buy processed foods and I do think organic is important. I just find myself sitting there in silence because I know nothing I say will be appropriate I guess. I am not judging them- to each their own- but I feel extremely alienated. I personally am the way I am because I feel like I am supposed to protect my baby from sickness and I don’t want to purposely put things in or on our bodies that aren’t good for us. I guess I’m just looking for advice because this has been really tough for me.

Almost all my in laws got vaccinated (covid) and now I’m nervous with my baby around them. It didn’t really bother me before he was born, but after he was born I started to get really anxious around them and at 9m that anxiety hasn’t really changed. I didn’t really attribute that anxiety to the vax but I’ve never felt uncomfortable being around other family that isn’t vaccinated which is strange.

In recent years I’ve become more aware of how a lot of things we buy are made with toxic additives and this increases our chances of all kinds of sicknesses like cancer, hormonal issues, ect. For this reason, I try really hard to only buy items that aren’t “toxic” such as stainless steel/ glass kitchen ware, solid wood furniture with non toxic stains, natural fabrics (clothes, sheets, ect), organic foods, ect… you get the picture. This has specifically become very important to me because I recently had a baby and want to do the best I can for him and my husband.
This lifestyle is tough though because I constantly feel like things need replaced in my home because they are toxic and non toxic items (especially certified ones) are expensive. Am I being sinful? I understand that everything is God’s will and if he wills us to have cancer we will. Ultimately we should trust him and I do. But I also feel like I should do my best to live clean because our bodies are temples and taking care of them is a way of worship. I feel convicted when I use a potentially toxic item but I also feel convicted about spending money on non toxic things because it doesn’t feel humble. This leads me to feeling deeply upset because then I feel like I’m thinking too much into worldly things that ultimately do not matter.
Any advice? Please be understanding, this first year postpartum has been a whirlwind of emotions as I have wanted to grow closer to God while navigating motherhood and new anxieties.

I’m exhausted. I never realized before how much mothers truly get the crappy end of the stick. I don’t understand why the world is the way it is.
My baby is going through the 8 month sleep regression at the moment and is waking up for long periods at 2 and 5am for no reason. He wants to stay attached to my boob all night and he won’t take a bottle. He also wants carried all day every day and my back feels like someone has beat me with baseball bat and installed a stiff board into it. I constantly feel like I’m never enough for my baby or anyone else and I feel like someone has drained the life out of me.
It’s not even my baby that really even has me spiraling, it’s my monster in laws that are constantly crap talking us for not going to all their family events and raising our child the same way they do. It’s the fact that all of our friends vape, cuss, drink, ect in front of their children (who are also ALWAYS sick) and leave them to go out every chance they get and we don’t want to do the same. It’s the battle with all the grandparents wanting to do whatever they want with him and their nasty comments when they don’t get their way. It’s the fact that I am constantly shamed for not leaving him places but he is literally 8 months old and neither one of us want to be separated. It’s the constant housework that I am doing everything in my power to keep up with. It’s the jealousy that his family has against mine because I like not even a mile from my parents and the constant stress to keep everything “fair” so I don’t get attacked. It’s my poor husband that gets upset every time the baby gets up because he leaves at 5am.
I am just so TIRED and nobody can help me because none of these issues are going anywhere. I love my son so much and in reality he is not the reason for my frustration and I know that. It’s the constant mental load of everything else and the fact that everyone I’m surrounded by apparently doesn’t seem to understand that I am human and just want the best for my child. Thanks for listening to my 4am sleep deprived vent.

I’m to the point that I can’t even hear the woman’s name without immediately getting in a bad mood. She had very little to do with us before my son was born. We heard from her maybe once a month and only saw her on holidays. Now since my son has been born, she harasses us to make time for her every other Saturday and always has some kind of drama. I literally cannot stand being around her. My husband’s dad died during Covid and his wife recently got remarried. We went to the wedding and she is all mad about that. She has been in my husband’s life since he was 10 and she’s always been good to us, of course we went. I also recently had to ask her not to kiss him, which I have always said since he was born, and she showed her butt in a restaurant and started crying. It’s one simple rule that I have always had, I wasn’t even rude when I said something. She’s constantly telling us that she is going to therapy and she’s going to have to quit her job because she’s depressed- like she’s blaming us. She also is mad we won’t go to her house but she has tons of animals and her house used to be smoked it- my son has pretty bad eczema and I don’t want it to flare. It is also a hour away and my son hates the car. I’m just so over it. She calls my husband and complains to him all the time and I obviously get to hear all she has to say. I hold my tongue so often- I just want to tell her that she’s miserable to be around and to leave us alone.

We have been working with our 7 month old on and off since 4 months (took breaks between 4 and 6 months due to lack of interest). Anyways, he’s tried probably 15+ things at this point but is becoming increasingly more un-interested in food. We are still doing purees because he chokes and gags if we do anything the least bit chunky. We might get two or three bites barely in his mouth before he refuses to open his mouth again. He will literally tense up and huff and puff at us because he doesn’t want any more. We try everyday and introduce new foods frequently but it’s not getting any better. I’m just a bit lost on what’s going on and if I should be concerned. I know food is “just for fun” right now and he is growing great but is there something else I should be doing? He is also exclusively breastfed and refuses to take bottles. He literally went 6+ hours without eating last time we tried the bottle. He’s honestly a great baby, just very set in his ways when it comes to eating and sleeping.

Hey friends. I have a 7 month old son and am at the start of my child raising journey. We plan to have many more. I am looking for advice on some things I have felt very conflicted about. I know we as Christians are supposed to be set apart which I am okay with. Almost everyone I am surrounded by however holds the belief that my children should do the same things as every other kid. I am specifically struggling with holidays and the man made “traditions” they have been given. I don’t particularly want to celebrate Halloween with my kids because of the dark meanings behind it. This is especially hard because my son’s birthday is Halloween. I also struggle with the Easter bunny and Santa because it overshadows the true meaning of those holidays for children. I am also feeling weird about Christmas trees and such because of the pagan reasons behind them. I also feel like it’s wrong to lie to your children about something like that, think about how devastated you were when you learned it was all fake and your parents lied. I’m okay with this idea of a “spring gift basket” and Christmas presents in a way that doesn’t disrespect the true meaning of these holidays. I am receiving so much criticism for these views though specifically from family. I would really appreciate some advice and additional facts if there are any that I can sit and ponder on. I understand that we all need holidays because they give us something to look forward to and raise our spirits, I just don’t know how to do it in a way that glorifies God. At the end of the day, I want my children to be saved and I don’t want them to be led astray because of traditions the rest of society follows.

Guys….. motherhood is actually so hard. I feel like the person I was is gone and while it’s not a terrible thing, there are moments where it is so sad. My kiddo is 7 months and we’re currently on a trip for a wedding. I haven’t spent a ton of time with these people since my baby was born but I tried to spend some time today with them. We were shopping which I used to love to do but I struggled so much today. I don’t think they noticed or cared which makes me feel better but it’s so isolating. I LOVE my baby SO MUCH. I just want a moment where he is content in his stroller and doesn’t want the boob or to be held. Shopping is so hard as it is too because he has eczema and really struggles with flares around fragrances and I have been trying to go more organic and do natural fibers for his sake. The mom guilt for even wanting to have a moment of how things were is so sad too. I don’t know what I wanted out of this but I’m just feeling down.

Guys, I have tried so hard. I just can’t stand my mother-in-law. I don’t hate her, but there is so much about her that really bothers me. How in the world am I supposed to deal with this? I have prayed and prayed and prayed. I have ignored my own feelings on multiple occasions. I suck up my feelings a lot but I’m so over it. I find myself sitting there on the edge every time we’re around her. I have a seven month old and I feel like it’s been one thing after another since he’s been born. It was easy before he was born because she chose not to have much to do with us but since he’s been born, it’s become too much. She is also extremely southern which I am not. The thing that really has me bothered at the moment is when we went to lunch on Saturday she was kissing all over him, but she knows I don’t want her kissing him. I said it before he was born and I’ve said it multiple times since he’s been born yet she chooses to ignore me and push boundaries. Anyways, at lunch, I simply said
“please don’t kiss him, it really just bothers me” and then she said, “ I was just kissing on him to make him laugh”, and then I said “ I know I just really don’t like anyone kissing him. I don’t let anyone kiss him except for us.” and then I dropped it. Well baby ended up having a little bit of a meltdown because he was tired so I left for probably five minutes to go to the car, pop him on the boob and let him fall asleep, and came back. Well, after lunch, we got in the car and my husband proceeds to tell me that she literally started crying because I told her that she can’t kiss him. I wasn’t mean, I didn’t yell. I just simply said please don’t kiss him and she proceeded to have a scene in front of everybody while I was gone. Obviously, my husband defended me so that that’s not the issue here. But it’s always something with her. I just struggle with this so much biblically. From what I’ve read, the only thing that she’s actually entitled to with my son is to teach him about the Lord, so I don’t think not letting her kiss him is a sin. I don’t want her kissing him (or anyone) because several people in my husband‘s family have cold sores and I also just don’t think it’s necessary. They can give him a hug or anything else, I just don’t want their mouth near him. I swear sometimes she is so possessive over him and it’s not cool. There are so many other things that I am not even going to go into here, but please just give me some advice. I would really love to move across the county to avoid these situations at this point, it’s making me that miserable.

My kiddo has about 10 pounds until he is out of his current car seat. I’m considering the nuna because it’s greenguard gold and will last pretty much until he is done with car seats. Any better options? Obviously they all aren’t great because they are mostly plastic but looking for the better out of the worst.

Hey everyone! I was feeling extremely nauseous and had a terrible headache the other day and had some strange spotting which made me pretty suspicious. I took a pregnancy test and sure enough I’m pregnant. Wasn’t exactly planned, I’m not upset, but I’m needing some encouragement on breast-feeding. A lot of things I’m reading say I’m going to lose my supply and that just breaks my heart. I have been exclusively breast-feeding without an issue and my baby refuses to take bottles. I will be exactly 6 months pregnant when my son turns one. How far do you guys think I’ll get? Any advice?

I have a 6 month old and I absolutely cannot stand going to family events with the in laws. Before anyone starts to attack, I handle going to my family’s events just fine and it all comes down to boundaries. With my family, I don’t have to worry about being harassed about passing him around and really don’t have to worry about anyone touching him. It’s great! I can let my parents hold him, and even my grandmother without worrying about him getting passed around, kissed, or touched by everyone. On the other hand, my husbands family just can’t seem to catch a hint. I do everything in my power to avoid going to anything with them because I know I’m going to be incredibly anxious and end up crying when we get home. Several of them smoke and they will touch all over his hands and face, some of them even kiss him knowing I am not okay with it. They act like I’m the problem and I can’t stand it. Do I have some mild postpartum anxiety, maybe, but I really think it’s instinctual to not let my child be treated like a toy. I let his mother come to our house and spend time with him so I’m not a terrible person. His father literally DIED during COVID. I just can’t stand going to events and I know they all hate me for it. His grandmother tries to have everyone over once a month and we never go and they always shame us for it. Does anyone else deal with this? Any advice? I’m never going to be okay with him being passed around and kissed, that’s just how I feel. They know this and are so mean about it.

I’ve been wanting to grow deeper in my faith and find my purpose so to speak and I’m just so lost. What does God want me doing with my life? I understand I’m supposed to submit to my husband, manage the household, take care of the children and teach them to follow Jesus, serve others, and be an example for other women but is there more? I grew up to be very strong willed which is something I really struggle with considering the bible calls us to be more quiet and obedient. I’m just needing advice, I’d really appreciate some verses and example of what I should be doing.