I'm currently going through a handful of weird medical shit waiting for my Dr while gimme the beat boys and free my soul is playing and I want to kill someone, I didn't bring headphones, fuck
WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA
As they're walking past me. As I'm right there, available to ask for help.
Or even BETTER.
"Oh my GOD I can't FIND (insert item here)!!!" As I'm right there. :) within sight. Like you could just ask me in my bright vest with my name tag.
Like i know they expect me to fall to my knees and ask them WHAT DO YOU NEED MY LORD?? HOW COULD I POSSIBLY HELP YOU??? But like 😭 Could they please also be an adult and ask for help if they need it. My god. It is not that difficult. Please cease your entitlement at once.
I checked for an item for an older lady...didn't have it. Like full stop, not in the store, she had to go online for it. She didn't believe me I guess and asked someone else, they proceeded to WALK PAST ME, and come to the same conclusion next to me. I told her maybe we'd get some closer to the summer.
I would be mortified. Like how was she not embarrassed lmao???? Did she think HIS PHONE would somehow magically bring the item to life??????
I didn't know which flair to put up...but I've been slowly painting the walls of my home, I yearn for color, and my den was next ❤️ I'm so happy with how it turned out. I love purple if uh, you couldn't tell 🥰 The art on the wall is a mix of mine, and purchased art.
And this is only half of them.
Just wanna show off my pretty girl, Citrus (an honorary orange cat) I'm glad she's also my smallest cat with how much she loves laying on me 😂
I work retail so I don't have control over what is played but MY GOD I HATE URGENT BY FOREIGNER
FUCK THAT SONG AND ITS STUPID SAXOPHONES
Am I cooked? Torch the house?!
They gotta stop leaving this shit everywhere, I WILL rip it up and immediately throw it away. Proselytize somewhere else please.
By which I mean, in conversations and friendships. I am an active listener, I ask follow up questions, I try and get to know the depth of what the person I'm talking to is talking about. I want to get to know them.
But when it's my turn to talk and tell a story, the same isn't ~given~ to me.
This has been a constant struggle, in quite literally every friendship I've ever had...and literally everyone I've spoken to. 🫠 It feels like the person is just waiting for me to stop talking so they can say something unrelated or just..insert their own topic or something?
Or, another way I've seen this, is giving advice or commiserating on things. I got yo BACK. I will give you as good if advice as I can and will rally with you. But when suddenly it's my turn...I don't get that in return from most of the people I communicate with.
Am I just selfish?? Am I asking for too much?? 😭 Idk what to do, should I tweak my expectations with folk??
36, afab
https://www.reddit.com/r/rheumatoid/comments/1q5sorn/hi_just_need_to_vent_and_share_what_ive_been/
https://www.reddit.com/r/rheumatoid/comments/1qrguuy/issues_part_2_electric_boogaloo/
https://www.reddit.com/r/rheumatoid/comments/1q97hqq/woke_up_this_morning/
https://www.reddit.com/r/rheumatoid/comments/1s0o1fh/weather_changes/
^ Some light reading if you're interested. TLDR; symptoms started 11/25. Paternal grandmother had awful rheumatoid arthritis in both hands to the point they could not move near the end of her life. For me, both hands, pain in knuckles at first, then redness, mild swelling, and varying levels of stiffness in the morning as time went on. Then I went in and got blood work and xrays at a walkin clinic 1/26, blood work clean and xrays showed nothing (obviously, it's way too soon for any bone degradation to actively show on an xray if my symptoms JUST started). 1 PCP said carpal tunnel, 1 PCP said wrist tendinitis. No numbness tingling in hands or wrist, no wrist pain or swelling. I had to basically beg my second PCP to get a rheumatologist referral because I kept hitting a wall, and the walk in clinic dr only gave me Meloxicam. Appointment was set for 4/29....today!
And...it was just. The worst.
As I went over the entire story he was smirking?? The entire time?? 0 bedside manner. He asked a lot of questions. If I got sick a lot, which yes, last year and this year. 10/25, 11/25, 12/25 I got sick each month, wore a mask till the end of flu season 3/1/26, and within 5 days of taking the mask off, sick again. Brushed it off, as I work a public facing job...stocking at walmart, the late shift. I don't talk to many people so... Okay..?
Told me since I had pain in some of the joints nearest to my nails that it couldn't be rA. Okay..? I can't find anywhere online if this is true or not. I do have OA in the family as well, he said it is more likely that. But I am....36? I mean I'm not saying it's impossible but...I do think I'm a bit young for that to show up so soon.
He also showed me the xray that was taken in 1/26...2 months after my symptoms began to start. And, since it was clean, he said it wasn't rA. OKAY???? TT_TT THE SYMPTOMS JUST STARTED MY GUY. AHHHHH. LIKE OBVIOUSLY NOT. Sorry for yelling I am so frustrated.
Said since I didn't ~present~ with my joints being hot to the touch it wasn't rA. But they have been hot to the touch. They have been swelling, and red. I told him all of this but it was like it didn't matter. He was very dismissive and I felt like I was wasting his time. He had me do more bloodwork, and then that was it, after a prescription for Naproxen. Just..naproxen. Gee willickers, thanks doc.
I am honestly so frustrated. I asked him what I could do right now to help my hands, as I told him they hurt EVERY DAY (some days are worse than others) and he just said "medicate". I...am at a loss. All this time waiting. Driving over an hour to get to this place. Just to be dismissed. Again.
I. Don't. Know. What. To. Do.