u/ricottacat

My (28F) bf (29M) blames me for all his/our issues and told me I've never met his needs or been a partner

My boyfriend when upset tells me I’m the source of his misery, financial stress, debt, emotional damage, and unmet needs. He says he’d be better off financially and emotionally if we’d never gotten together, and he would be ahead if it weren't for me. I’ve been jobless for a few months while trying to finish my degree and deal with the fact that my mom is dying, but he says I don’t have “real responsibilities” like he does because he works 40 hours a week. I've contributed what I can in the relationship and helped with moving costs, household items, handle errands, shopping, cooking, cleaning, and we live in a rural area so this is why its been difficult for me. I've never struggled with work before. He does pay all bills alone though and I know this effects him, and I'm desperately trying for work.

A huge issue is sex/intimacy. He says I haven’t met his sexual needs, and he blames a lot of his unhappiness and insecurities on me. He also says my insecurities as a woman are “fixable” with effort or surgery, so my struggles aren’t comparable to his as a man. He has had insecurities as a man and with himself, he has severe blame towards me with this specific topic and says I've committed unforgiveable and inexcusable actions regarding this. Hes compared me sexually to past partners and his ex, to materials he watched, blames my PCOS which I've also been trying to diet/gym/desperately go to doctors who don't care.

What confuses me is that no matter how much I apologize, take accountability, ask what I can do better, clean, emotionally support him, or try to talk things through, it’s apparently never enough. He says I should already know how to be a partner and that it’s not his job to tell me. He says a relationship shouldnt be this hard and says I've hurt him the worst in his life and destroyed him as a man. This is so damaging to hear, I just had a panic attack outside after hearing this again.

He's also kind of cheated multiple times, by downloading dating apps, sending ntimate pictures to other people because of the resenment he has for me attached to his insecurity. He has lied to me, called me names, exploded during fights, and then justified this by saying the relationship or my behavior “caused” him to do those things, my mistakes pushed him to do these things or say these things to me. Basically that I deserve it because of this or because I'm not sexually attractive anymore after being sick and gaining weight.

He also claims I never supported him emotionally, which honestly hurts because I absolutely have even with my own health issues, stressful periods, and through his emotional breakdowns. I was emotionally supporting him before and after surgery, have always asked if hes okay, how he feels, if he needs anything, offer massages, express remorse, care, or love, he rejects my compliments, reassurance, and efforts a lot. He always paints and sees me in a negative picture and accuses me of the same.

I have tried in this relationship and I have taken accountability, apologized, cried, begged, tried to change, adapt, make effort, listen, it hurts he truly believes I haven't. He says I've projected, I am a liar, a hypocrite, stunted, not a real adult, he was better off alone and never needed help from anyone like I have and he managed to get his s\*\* together. Is what hes said.

The worst part is the constant flip-flopping. Sometimes he says everything is my fault and I ruined his life. Other times he admits he contributed too. Sometimes finances “don’t matter,” then suddenly they’re proof I destroyed everything. Sometimes he says we should’ve never been together, but if I talk about leaving, he gets angry too.

I know I’m not perfect. I can be anxious, emotional, clingy, and intense when I feel abandoned. I have made mistakes and been a terrible gf at times. But I genuinely can’t tell anymore if I’m actually abusive/selfish or if this relationship has just become consumed by resentment, blame, cheating, and emotional damage..I am desperate to fix things as stupid as I may sound for this.

TL;DR: My boyfriend says I ruined his life financially, emotionally, and sexually, while blaming me for his cheating and mistreatment. I’m dealing with being jobless, finishing my degree, and my mom dying, but he says I don’t have “real” responsibilities. I’m trying to understand if I’m truly the problem or if our relationship has become toxic and full of resentment.

My boyfriend when upset tells me I’m the source of his misery, financial stress, debt, emotional damage, and unmet needs. He says he’d be better off financially and emotionally if we’d never gotten together, and he would be ahead if it weren't for me. I’ve been jobless for a few months while trying to finish my degree and deal with the fact that my mom is dying, but he says I don’t have “real responsibilities” like he does because he works 40 hours a week. I've contributed what I can in the relationship and helped with moving costs, household items, handle errands, shopping, cooking, cleaning, and we live in a rural area so this is why its been difficult for me. I've never struggled with work before. He does pay all bills alone though and I know this effects him, and I'm desperately trying for work.

A huge issue is sex/intimacy. He says I haven’t met his sexual needs, and he blames a lot of his unhappiness and insecurities on me. He also says my insecurities as a woman are “fixable” with effort or surgery, so my struggles aren’t comparable to his as a man. He has had insecurities as a man and with himself, he has severe blame towards me with this specific topic and says I've committed unforgiveable and inexcusable actions regarding this. Hes compared me sexually to past partners and his ex, to materials he watched, blames my PCOS which I've also been trying to diet/gym/desperately go to doctors who don't care.

What confuses me is that no matter how much I apologize, take accountability, ask what I can do better, clean, emotionally support him, or try to talk things through, it’s apparently never enough. He says I should already know how to be a partner and that it’s not his job to tell me. He says a relationship shouldnt be this hard and says I've hurt him the worst in his life and destroyed him as a man. This is so damaging to hear, I just had a panic attack outside after hearing this again.

He's also kind of cheated multiple times, by downloading dating apps, sending ntimate pictures to other people because of the resenment he has for me attached to his insecurity. He has lied to me, called me names, exploded during fights, and then justified this by saying the relationship or my behavior “caused” him to do those things, my mistakes pushed him to do these things or say these things to me. Basically that I deserve it because of this or because I'm not sexually attractive anymore after being sick and gaining weight.

He also claims I never supported him emotionally, which honestly hurts because I absolutely have even with my own health issues, stressful periods, and through his emotional breakdowns. I was emotionally supporting him before and after surgery, have always asked if hes okay, how he feels, if he needs anything, offer massages, express remorse, care, or love, he rejects my compliments, reassurance, and efforts a lot. He always paints and sees me in a negative picture and accuses me of the same.

I have tried in this relationship and I have taken accountability, apologized, cried, begged, tried to change, adapt, make effort, listen, it hurts he truly believes I haven't. He says I've projected, I am a liar, a hypocrite, stunted, not a real adult, he was better off alone and never needed help from anyone like I have and he managed to get his s** together. Is what hes said.

The worst part is the constant flip-flopping. Sometimes he says everything is my fault and I ruined his life. Other times he admits he contributed too. Sometimes finances “don’t matter,” then suddenly they’re proof I destroyed everything. Sometimes he says we should’ve never been together, but if I talk about leaving, he gets angry too.

I know I’m not perfect. I can be anxious, emotional, clingy, and intense when I feel abandoned. I have made mistakes and been a terrible gf at times. But I genuinely can’t tell anymore if I’m actually abusive/selfish or if this relationship has just become consumed by resentment, blame, cheating, and emotional damage..I am desperate to fix things as stupid as I may sound for this.

TL;DR: My boyfriend says I ruined his life financially, emotionally, and sexually, while blaming me for his cheating and mistreatment. I’m dealing with being jobless, finishing my degree, and my mom dying, but he says I don’t have “real” responsibilities. I’m trying to understand if I’m truly the problem or if our relationship has become toxic and full of resentment.

Hellllllo brother country 🇰🇷🇹🇷 !! (Lowkey proud to have a dollap of korean in my gene pool). I am familiar with Turkish, English, Kazakh (kinda) and Russian (kinda), not Korean..unfortunately but if there was promising longterm work/residency in Korea, obviously I'd do immersive tutoring and dedicate the time.

I guess..I got excited when I saw someone on TikTok beg for good kebap vendors 😎 but lowkey I'll cook but obviously was curious about stable career for international sector, if there was anything specific? I'm kind of flexible with an IR degree and a few tech/language certs, and can get a TEFL but would rather not unless its a safe way in. Any suggestions on skills or prospective for something needed? I'd like to earn my keep.

Very kindly 🫂

I really cant collect everything out into a post right now but I am desperate for male perspective in the shoes so I can please..get some clarity

Hi! So I'm probably going to delete this because this is my closet skeleton and I have a lot of unresolved emotions/thoughts with this. I am Eurasian and live in the US, and met my ex at University. I didn't notice any red flags until multiple months in and brushed them off. He had issues with immaturity, jealousy, and anger. Now that I remember actually he faked a British accent for a few months before I found out and that really put me off to things but I tried to understand maybe he was insecure as an international student.

He wanted to spend a lot of time together and move in after a few months. After we started living together he isolated me and I was not allowed to have friends, family, or talk to even a grocery clerk without accusations and rage. He grew angry with me if I was exposed to my allergies, he made me switch my degree from linguistics, and once he said a very horrid direct insult regarding MY home country. He looked down on me for this, for working and going to school, I didn't know this until he made it apparent later on.

Somehow he convinced me to go to China, I somehow obtained a visa despite my country of origin and present country, I went for a few months. I love China, I love Chinese culture and can find relation being Eurasian/Asian mixed, but I appreciates China's history, modernity, and the food so much. When I think about my memories in China I actually breakdown and get so sad because I feel like maybe its not safe for me to go back. Everyone I met, all the places I went, the regions, I feel so incredibly depressed if I can't ever try to return.

I say this because his parents work in the governmental party, I think his dad was a mayor or something important LIKE that in a specific region. Will I be okay if I work/tourist in another region? Is it not safe at all for me? Is there a risk that if I'm back he or his family would be notified? I mean this could entirely be a lie, I mean they could afford to send him abroad and pay $40k tuition a semester and also pay $80k to his bank transfer for the annual budget? I have no idea. The life I experienced there I feel at least this was authentic.

I miss his grandparents and cousins, how warm his dad was, how his mom would care for me despite being a bit less warm than her husband. I tried with Mandarin, which annoyed my ex that I wanted to learn.

They never know the truth for why we divorced. He hit me when he was beating our pet after I gave it too much attention, this was a pet he insisted on getting after he drowned the previous one after it scratched him when he hurt it. I still have nightmares where I hear the noises she made and I breakdown about it often. I don't have their address to write to them. I am 90% sure he married me for citizenship and to have US greencard, since he pushed marriage and his parents actually weren't cool with it. Like they liked me but wanted us to wait, he rushed it.

After we married, I couldn't go back to work when he complained about spending even though he was the one to control the money. I'm not sure if he was honest with his parents for why I could only provide my scholarship monthly stipend as contribution, as he refused to let me work. They couldn't understand that I'm adopted, my parents died and I wasn't left with money, yet this was a reflection on my worth as a woman? Anyway.

He was obsessed with firearms and the freedom of having them in the state we lived in. He would pretend to get emotional and try to harm himself. I couldn't take all of this and asked for a divorce. I actually asked for an annulment but he refused. He fought me a lot on it, I walked away with my life and didn't ask for anything. I rebuilt alone with nothing.

He joined the military to keep his residency and not depend on me for renewal. He tried to call me to get back together for about 6 months to a year after we divorced officially. I don't actually know if he really loved me.

He said we'd have a big wedding in China but we never made it that far. It was just a court house, I wore a black dress and knew the day we did I shouldn't but did anyway. I never got a real ring or anything. I actually got Covid during our beach trip during the courthouse vacation week and he got mad at me for this too, lol. Yelling at me and making me drive feverish, absolutely rotten. I think its because he was a spoiled only child from a wealthy family. Who knows?

I don't know if this is normal..if I was naive and fell for an obvious 'gotcha'. I don't know if I can ever go back to China, if its safe, if I shouldn't. My ex aside, when I visited I was questioned in Uyghur and in Mandarin, so. Maybe I'm over worrying? Thats why I wanted to ask you guys. This sub is very heartwarming, informational, has the best vibes and insight. I really appreciate you taking the time to read this and its been heavy on my conscious to try to gain some perspective on this. Thank you kindly.

I really hope there is and wanted to know if anyone could DM me so I can hopefully meet cool people and make new friends!

I had bunnies, hamsters, and have babysat a lot of pets and exotic pets. I also previously had a ferret as a pet and loved Cheesecake with every part of me but had to rehome him in fear my violent ex would kill my ferret. I had to pretend he was too much work to keep him safe.

Its been 6 years since this and I am alone in the US and really want to channel love, care, and ability to a rescue ferret. I am completely open to getting an elderly ferret or special needs ferret, and have experience with deaf animals.

I have ferret proofed an apartment before, still supervised and leashed just in case, absolutely love them so much. Them..minks..stoats..weasels..❤️

I wasn't sure if it just depends on your area or what the process is like..but if anyone had any suggestions, advice, or experience obtaining a rescue and insight regarding, I'd love to hear from you!

🐞 Firstly the cast looks amazing, all the main casts prior performances have been fantastic! And everyone else deserves a breakout role and despite maybe having a smaller role is going to do equally as amazing!!

They have kept so many small details to honor the book and I am honestly not ready to see so many moments on the screen. I know 1000% I will be bawling my eyes out, seeing some of Joseph Zada's moments in the trailers and how much emotion the rest of the cast has put in..I'm not ready 😭.

(If you haven't read SOTR please don't continue reading as I'm not giving spoilers but I want to freely talk without worrying of spoiling for someone, so stop here 🐞🐞🐞)

I'm not ready for Maysilee, Ampert, Wellie, Haymitch's doves and events after he comes home..I wonder if they'll keep the chocolate scene in or how much they'll change for the film rating. I'm not ready for Buck and the others and wonder if they'll keep all of the mutts in this book in the movie. They have already teased SO many emotional moments. I love all the colours they've added and I think the final motion picture will include even more. I feel like Wyatt will be as emotionally impactful as he was in the novel, I wonder how deep they'll go with Louella and if they'll include any of the songs in the book? :(

I'm rereading the book for the 3rd time in the past year, I think I do a read every 4 months now haha. As much as I love the entire series..SOTR, and the original HG hit different.

I haven't had this since I could snag it at a Vietnamese run Asian Market in Tempe area. You could buy it frozen by the box wholesale :(

I live in the rural south rn and its horrible but I'll be leaving soon to find the best Vietnamese food stops like I did in AZ, CA, NY, and the UK.

But whats a good recipe for Bánh Bôt Lọc I can make at home with frozen banana leaves, tapioca starch, prawns..I've had the tofu variant and like it. The prawn one is my favourite but my SO hates shellfish..:( and neither of us eats pork often enough nor wants to eat mass produced pork/chicken so we stick to vegetarian/fish/beef private options for meats in the US.

Is there a way to make this with something to supplement the prawns and pork thats not tofu? (Any game meat? Non-tofu option but if there isn't really anything I'll make it the traditional way and maybe sub pork for beef :c

If I am obsessed with this dish, Phò Gà, Bún Chà Giò, Gòi cuôn, Canh khoai mõ, and literally every Viet seafood dish, does anyone have any other recipes to try at home/order out?

I honestly cant live without a Lee's Sandwiches near me and I make phò bone broth at home for autoimmune issues but pleeeeaaaase like at this point even if I could pay someone to deliver them I would.

That is all :c

I have no idea what this is, but it was a chicken dish and she served it on a small long plate. There were three balls of chicken and it had skin on it and the texture was divine. It wasn't fried or tempura, it was served as a cold dish. I loved it so much 😭 if anyone can help me figure this out. Believe me I've tried googling it over the years and my childhood friend has no idea what I'm talking about because her mom always cooked so much stuff.

And this is coming from someone who when starting college actually studied psychology and neurobiology when I previously majored in genetic engineering. I always thought that the mental health field was advanced, there were multiple therapy, treatment, and medication options..that the biggest hurtle was a cultural feelings towards mental health..

It wasn't until I actually needed help..that I saw how flawed, horrid, and sociopathic the system in the US really is. It for me started during the height of covid, after very rough personal life events (abusive relationship), I was finally able to work again, had a horrible roommate, and a bad eating disorder. I was just told I had ADHD when I said the stress was affecting my ability to focus and balance full time school and 3 jobs. But who wouldn't stress like this freshly divorced with no family help or support system? So they threw Adderall at me..that didn't help.

I moved overseas and to NYC, didn't get help until I moved back to GA where I had graduated high-school (military family). I didn't realize what a shit hole GA was and how stuck in the stone age they are to workers rights, wages, education, and their medical system. If I went into detail on the unprofessionalism, abuse, and toxicity of the medical system I've experienced in GA, I'd reach the character limit.

My old PCP here and the Psych I went to both laughed at me for using Genesight despite being told that by another PCP. They got weird about me saying SSRIs dont work for me and I was forced to try all the main ones as a teenager back in this same area. GA LOVES SSRIs and they LOVE Hydroxyzine. I have said neither of these options work for my panic attacks, adrenaline, anxiety, or helps me sleep.

The PCP said I have to try Effexor or she's going to prescribe me antipsychotics. This was an establishing visit with her, and she refused to listen to me about my symptoms, concerns, how desperate I was to relieve panic I've had for 2 years now consistently and daily..nope. These people honestly I think get off to it or they really are sociopaths.

She refused beta blockers or any actual anti anxieties and I understand the risks involved with benzos but I literally would give anything for a 1mg not daily script, I have been in constant panic since being ejected out of a car, a traumatic life, and not being well off currently economically. I understand a lot of people are anti medication but I wanted to temporarily have at least the option to calm down. I'm tired of insomnia, heart palpitations, adrenaline surges, crying spells, worries, and the crushing chest pain waves. I really have to work and go to school so I need additional aid..I've tried breathing exercises, mind exercises, redirecting attention, praying, crying, processing emotions, reassuring myself, cold or hot water, calling someone, no I actually really need help for anxiety/panic (:

Finding a doctor that listens...oooooof. They like to judge, stereotype, and treat you subhuman. They said there are no effects with Effexor and that it wouldn't make my adrenaline surges worse. It did. It made my nausea, vomiting, sleep, worse. It blunted my intuition and self regulation because I am self aware even if I'm struggling.

They don't factor in life stress, they don't factor in your records, your medication history, they will put you through the same 6 months on this, 3 months on that..its awful. Its so weird to pay so much to go to the doctor and they treat you like they are doing you a favor by not even listening to you or giving you something better for your body? If addiction is the only concern..may I raise you: Effexor withdrawals.

I had cyclic vomiting from an ovarian torsion and the ER staff was so mean to me about my mental health notes that bias doctors in the area put in here. GA medical "professionals" are so petty, toxic, and trashy. Ironic when they want to give a lecture but they have a vape and delta pen on the desk. They gave me Reglan at the ER and I had the worse panic and climbing out of my skin restlessness..they told me that's not common, the first they've ever seen or heard of anyone react like that, and then misheard me ask for Benadryl as asking for a Benzo, then sent the lead doctor in to lecture me. I literally cant.

At this point I'm afraid to go to the doctor and I withdrawed from Effexor. I get cold turkey isn't wise but I was on 37.5mg for 3 months and went 3 days without a dose and just rode it out..I thought I was dying but I'm almost to day 6 and it feels a lot better and I feel more myself..and this medicine was HELL on my already anxious panicked body.

I will be going overseas for care. I'm done.

I have tried for sooo long to make both of these and it always turns out never how I've had at authentic Japanese cuisine level :( and I am a decent cook and a lot of my other dishes I'm able to make at home and enjoy more than ordering in/going out.

Do I need to cave an get a special pan or is there anyway to just make either of these with basic cookware? Like I 100% know its something I'm doing or maybe I'm japanese egg culinary repellent naturally..but I am desperate!

I don't like eating meat daily while living in America and am trying to incorporate eggs a few meals a week, so this is absolutely dire 😭

Hi guys! I'm 26F and I was born in Turkey, turkish is my original nationality..and it literally separates Europe from Asia, with 70% of the country being west asian.

I was born in Turkiye and am Turkish but ethnically I am Turkish, Greek, Italian, and Armenian (mom's side) and my dad's side is Kazakh, Mongolian, and Korean. I'm a mixture of West/Central/East Asian and European, but I guess having reddish-brown hair and distinct light golden eyes..its like I have to defend myself?

Tbh its just been men in the US that say things like:

"You aren't really asian. You aren't asian enough. West and Central Asia isn't really Asia. You're barely Korean, if only you got the good genes. If you were full Korean you'd be really hot. Why don't you have monolids? You're just trying to be asian, are you a weeb?"

I'm really tired of having to educate others that Turkey is not a Middle Eastern country, not everyone there is even Muslim really, I'm not and my family does not care, lol. Its like Turkey has all kinds of races and ethnicities but we are all Turkish there, as would the same be in Canada, Australia, UK, US, etc. Same logic, idk why white American guys have this difficulty.

And HONESTLY some male friends I previously had that were fully SAE wouldn't invalidate me for being asian BUT they were hard pressed that I'm white, I'm mixed, THAT aspect is more positive.

It honestly makes me feel really awful. I know turkish and some Mandarin, Korean, Vietnamese, French, Italian, and other Turkic languages like enough that if I traveled there I'd be alright at least getting food and basic conversations.

I have grown up eating asian food and Turkish foods because my adoptive dad spent majority of his life in Japan and I remember going to college and my roommates saw my groceries before they actually saw me and when they did they gasped and were like "We thought you were going to be asian based on your groceries" and I got really quiet and told them "I am..but okay" and its like the spent the next few months drilling me, quizzing me linguistically because they didn't believe I spoke anything but English with my Californiaaaaa aceeeeent.

I was a part of the Asian & Pacific Islanders Association at my college and made a lot of friends my first semester there, I just wanted to help out because I was forced to immigrate to America and its been hard for me in many ways. A lot of people secretly talked crap about me (not in the club) and said I had an Asian fetish or was a weeb.

For being CULTURED AND EDUCATED people will literally ask if you're a weeb, or insinuate all kinds of assumptions and then want to argue with me on if I'm really asian or not, its honestly dystopian.

If I make any Japanese or Korean food I grew up with, I'm fake. If I make turkish food, I'm fake or actually just Middle Eastern. And that boils my blood because its not like that and the Ottoman Empire and Byzantine Empire and Roman Empire all existed there and encompassed so much.

And let me tell you, honestly. Turkish people have always accepted me no problem. But Mediterranean people are very patriot and nationalistic and its also hard there because they just say "American" to me now...and they don't think you're REALLY Greek or Italian even if your grandparents on one side live in Italy and are from the Calabria region. Like they shame you for being southern italian, they shame you for your family being on a Greek island and not mainland. Like it really doesn't end.

I've just said I'm Eurasian to keep it simple or Aegean and Asian. No one understands but no one wants to be educated or believe me, its like they think I'm harvesting special points because even my boyfriend has said "do you think you're special or something because you aren't"

And I cannot tell you how depressed I am and anxious from this and life in general because its like I am only accepted back in Turkey. Thats the only place I've felt safe and understood.

Does anyone else have similar experiences or has any advice?

I apparently had chickenpox when I was young and then got it a second time which I do remember, and have a forehead scar from it.

I've been told by everyone, "I'm probably going to get shingles" and I'm 28F, I'm absolutely terrified and I don't know if theres anything I can do to prevent this?

Please excuse my ignorance and anxiety, I'm so sorry if this isn't my place to inquire.

Hi, I just found this subreddit and I just really need people who understand. I have PMOS, OCD and anxiety/panic disorder, I relocated back to GA like almost 3 years ago at this point..and I cannot describe the step down its been with wages, quality of life, and medical care.

I tried to get treatment for panic/anxiety, but was dumped SSRIs despite telling them none of them worked for me that I have tried, and I didnt ask for anything in specific. They still pushed Zoloft at me, ignored my Genesight that my PCP told me to take, they pushed Hydroxyzine despite it not working, increased the dose, also put me on an antipsychotic but lied to me and told me it was just a sleep medication. When I had to go to the ER for ovarian torsion, they judged me for being on an antipsychotic..and didn't believe me when I was dumbfounded and confused that my doctor wasnt honest about that. The same doctor had told me to cold turkey Zoloft/Sertraline for a colonoscopy and I literally banged my head screaming and crying in my closet. I called my psychiatrist because insurance in GA only grants me access to literally 2 locally scrappy psychs, and he didnt even try to return my call until a week later. I just never went back to him, he refused to listen to me anyway.

My new PCP refused to give me beta blockers, any kind of actual classed anti anxiety, and threatened that if Effexor doesnt work for me that her next line will be antipsychotics. I will literally never go back to that demons office, she laughed at me and said her Nigerian medical background she knows Effexor and an increase of Hydroxyzine will work for me.

It does not! :D

I've been having cyclic vomiting with ovarian cysts and a lot of reproductive cycle issues. I am so sick of being gaslighted that its okay, my hair fell out, I literally gained like 80 lbs and the doctors just think I'm fat and lazy, and that I'm clinically insane. Its literally terrifying. I have had my OBGYN here in Middle GA be so unprofessional, NPs and MDs SO unprofessional. Literally before my surgery they saw I had a major accident and then were like "oh my god you should be dead, how did you survive, what was it like?" BEFORE SURGERY, thats GREAT medical care, holy shit. "MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS" Lmao.

You can literally look up all the toxic nurses, medical gaslightling, medical negligence that people die from and cant sue for or prove, MOST in one video by SheeraSherraOnTheWall like 8/10 crap nurses, nurse abuse, twerking on dying patients, we're ALL GA.

Grady, Emory, Houston Healthcare, Piedmont, Navicent, or Atrium..ALL SHIT. IDK if its the south but the amount of literal trash with a job title is outstanding. They truly take your money and dont care about you at all.

They didn't give me surgical socks despite being a fall risk for my surgery recovery. They didn't care I was dehydrated and not recovering well and still kicked me out without meds except norco which made my stomach issues worse and I couldn't even take them. They didn't refill my anti nauseas. They didn't care I peed myself and then got so mad at me like I wanted to. When I was crying and begging for help vomiting a nurse hissed at me to LITERALLY "SHUT UP! You're disturbing other patients!"

I am in like thousands of medical debt now, without any help for me problems. I went from modeling in Manhattan to being bloated and balding, and they just literally do not care or do anything, I've gone to multiple PCPs, specialists.

So my point with this now is all of these medications within like 1 year as well as recently being given Reglan at the ER..then being gaslighted. I don't know how this is going to be okay, I actually do feel insane now at this point. When they gave me Reglan I had a horrible reaction and asked my nurse to please give me Bendadryl. I literally asked for Benadryl and she got all jumpy and weird and was like "DUUHHH DURRRRR I CANT GIVE YOU A BENZO, AND THATS WEIRD YOU SAY REGLAN IS CAUSING YOU ANXIETY, NONE OF MY PATIENTS HAVE EVER HAD THAT REACTION"

WHAT THE FUCK DO THEY GET OUT OF THIS?? IS THIS A FETISH?? IS EVERYONE HERE A FUCKING FREAK? IS IT THAT HARD TO BE A HUMAN BEING TO SOMEONE OR GOD DAMN FUCKING ACTUALLY LISTEN OR DO YOUR FUCKING JOB?

I can't sleep anymore, I go to bed at like 6am and wake up at lunch, the fight or fight doesnt turn off, I'm dissocating, I dont feel okay, something always feels off or wrong, I am shakey, my jaw is clenching all the time, I am so nauseous or put off to pretty much everything except soups, I feel like I should break up with my boyfriend so he can have someone normal, my moms dying and then I'm alone in America as a foreign adoptee and I am TERRIFIED if this is the life I'm going to have in the US, or how I'm treated for anxiety.

Let's pretend I didn't have a metabolic hormonal disorder that can cause anxiety or anything else I mentioned, right? Even if it was all mental, why do you treat me like I'm subhuman or why are you more merciful to animals?? Like dogs or cats can get prescribed shit for anxiety but a fully grown functional human?? Oof, they must be drug seeking!

Mind you, my bf works in health tech for this shithole state and he has quite literally seen and I have with my own eyes, so many nurses here are high at work, bring their weed pens to work, vape at work, I had literally asked for help aid from doctors and nurses to stop vaping and they laugh and say they are addicted to and don't prescribe shit.

They fake their piss tests, which I wouldnt give a fuck but I DO when THEY can be prescribed whatever the hell they want and get personal cocktails of medications for their anxiety and 12 hour shifts, but IM not a nurse faking my piss tests, so even fathoming 1mg of an anxiety anxiety for not even daily use, ooooof, I'm insane and entitled I guess! And criminal despite not having addiction or anything legally, just one parking ticket.

I want to beat my head into the fucking wall at this point and I'm debating just working in Seattle for like 2 years to pay my debts and dip, Idk if I'm poor overseas, I'm poor here, and at least in my home country panic attacks ARE taken seriously and its not a $4k+ medical bill to get your vitals taken and screamed at.

I'm suffering. I don't have help. I don't know what to do. My body and my mind do not feel like mine anymore, I feel so fucking far away, I literally cannot function, I'm probably going to lose my 3 year relationship, my mom this year, I am desperate to go back to college, I have been out of work since January and I've worked since 17 with a limp from my accident.

I broke 23 bones, went through a month long coma, six month recovery, I do not take any pain meds except an occasional ibuprofen but believe me, god man my back hurts sometimes and I CANT sleep. But they DO NOT give a fuck. I would give anything to just have my hair grow back so I can go to fucking work without it being weird, or maybe have my bf NOT have a wandering eye or doubts of me and my health issues which he didn't sign up for and he's sick of being the breadwinner.

Idk, man. I really don't know anything anymore except this country's medical system is DOG SHIT and expensive. I hate it here, genuinely. I genuinely do. I wasn't even born here nor wanted to come, never felt like I belonged.

I've had akathisia now for what, six months? Longer? I couldn't say, my mind is mush.

I currently and unfortunately live in GA, US. This is the worst state rated to work in, healthcare, so many things. Its horrible. I'm not in Atlanta.

I've gone to 5+ doctors, multiple specialists, mental health referrals..I gave them my genesight, I've begged for help for hairless, weight gain, pcos/pmos symptoms, ocd, and panic disorder.

I've been gaslighted, infantized, ridiculed, stereotyped, judged, ignored, dismissed, and of course labeled as drug seeking. Why? Oh, because Lexapro, Sertraline, Buspirone, Effexor, and Prozac don't work for me? Wow!

I have zofran and fenegran, my pcp refused to give me beta blockers or any emergency use anti anxiety. She threatened to put me on an antipsychotic before an anti anxiety. I hate the stigma against anti anxiety medications and I want to lose my mind.

I owe thousands in medical appointment fees and co-pays, but no medication, no help. I can barely think or function, I wake up nauseous, I have cyclic vomiting and panic attacks constantly. I literally wake up with panic attacks. I have been saying for years I have CONSTANT anxiety that doesnt go away.

If they allowed assisted goodnight in the US, I would at this point. Since they refuse to give me even a few pills to just feel normal after suffering constantly. I just want to be able to sleep. Its 4am and I'm wide awake, melatonin, benadryl, and magnesium do not help me. I begged for sleep medicine also, she wouldnt do that.

Idk why they love SSRI/SNRI and Hydroxyzine so much, but I hope karma gets all these pigs back one day.

Ive been on 37.5mg for 2-3 months and have two weeks left, I have the little orange tablets not the XR with beads. Thank you..I'm sorry to ask. I dont know if a pharmacist could give me an emergency supply, I cannot go to a self pay urgent care or anything right now because thats $100+ for just self-pay alone and I dont have a job at the moment.

This is my experience and I've been begging for years for my anxiety and panic to be taken seriously. I have OCD and every morning since like age 12 I've woken up with intense nausea, cyclic vomiting, dry heaving, hot and cold flashes, a thudding heartbeat, chest pressure, stomach pain, and god if I have to have diarrhea I literally feel like I'm dying.

I've been tested for GI issues and have acid reflux and stomach ulcers when stressed. Obviously, lol! Its quite literally constant panic. I can have multiple panic attacks a day, no reason, crying episodes, I have BEGGED doctors in GA to PLEASE let me have a few beta blockers or anti anxiety meds for emergency use. I don't ask for specifics, I dont ask for benzos even though I know they would be helpful. I just want 1mg, like 5 pills for emergency use..please. ALL THEY DO HERE IS SSRI OR SNRI. Yes, I take Effexor. Yeah, its helpful. But it doesn't solve even half my symptoms. I even threw up so much the past three days that I went through Effexor withdrawals.

They wont give benzos, they wont give beta blockers, they will give Hydroxyzine but that doesnt help me much honestly. If I told them that multiple years where its effecting my quality of life and sanity, I am brushed off as anxious, crazy, and drug seeking. Like honestly I'm at the point where I'm going to work and fly home to Turkiye and see if at least I wont have this fucking problem, but that will take months in this economy.

I hate doctors. I hate medical professionals. I hate psychiatrists. At least in GA, USA THEY DONT LISTEN OR GIVE A FLIP. I'm sorry, its 11am for me and I woke up at 9:30 on the dot, took an 8mg fennegran when I got the nausea waves, still vomited, still palpitations and misery for literally almost two hours now. And its like this EVERY DAY for me, I am so TIRED of it.

I drink water, I drink electrolyte drinks, I live on applesauce and soup. I have soft blankets, I take hot baths, I try to exercise, I try to do artwork or listen to music, I try breathing exercises, I try looking around the room for grounding techniques, I pray to God, I cry, I calm myself down or try to. Like I am so tired of just begging for help and I am so sick of being gaslighted.

I have nocturnal panic attacks that bleed into waking up and sometimes last for 4-6 hours. I can't live like this.