r/wasian

Idk what to do bruh(and yea i dont have the girl privilege meaning dont flood my dms so yea)

for context: my father is white, my mother is southeast asian and i am mixed race (asian and white). I have mixed features but i look more like my mother/asian side and get mistaken for just asian most of the time.

also for context: my parents had a messy divorce in the previous years.

I honestly don’t really know what to make of this experience and how to feel about this. Me, my sister, father and his parents were out in public having drinks and we were talking about my plans to move to a bigger city than the city i currently live in for university- which is a small city by the coast in the country we live in. My sister, father and his parents all live in a rural area of the countryside which is where i grew up and i hated it. Being the only mixed race poc in my small town, going to a predominantly white school with maybe five other poc kids in the entire school was not a fun experience growing up. There was a lot of racially motivated bullying and harassment, especially during covid. There was even an instance where i was physically assaulted by two people who had issue with me because of my race, because i was “dirty”.

My father disapproved of my plans for the future and his reasoning and response was along the lines of “cities just aren’t safe. you’re a vulnerable white woman and cities are full of so many (insert horrible words/slurs for non white people) who have taken over this country”. Reminder- i am half white, half asian, and monoracial asian passing.

By this point im used to my father being openly, loudly and publically racist (he has said some very racist things about almost every race on the planet that isn’t the white race) and i am fully aware that he did not take the divorce to my asian mother well at all. I am also transgender- ftm- and my father is aware of this and has been for the past seven years but chooses not to acknowledge it. Doesn’t surprise me, i’m used to that by now. That being said, im BAFFLED that he called me a “vulnerable white woman” when i am very clearly not white and he knows i’m not a woman and am in the process of transitioning. Like i expected him to ignore the transgender aspect but to call me white??? HE is the one who decided to marry my asian mum, move her half way across the world, and have two children with her (me and my sister). For him to call me white despite being fully informed about my heritage and having functioning, working eyes in his head… it definitely upset me, invalidated me and also stunned me. Even now i’m stunned that my own father is basically ignoring my heritage and white washing me because now that he’s divorced from his “exotic wife” i guess he hates asians or something???

He made some passive aggressive comments regarding my race in the past (e.g “the way you are sitting isn’t very english” “that’s not very english of you”) but i never imagined that he would be getting bolder and more ludicrous in this way. Is this a relatable experience for other Wasians here or is my family just straight up terrible??

Be honest…

Just curious about how well the average wasian person ages compared to the average Asian person. Asians are known for having great skin and aging very slowly, whereas white people are known for the opposite, so I'm wondering if wasians also inherit the aging genes from their Asian side, or if they usually age like their white side. For those of you who are older than 30, how well have you aged, and do you think you look considerably older or younger than full Asian people who are your age?

I present mostly white. Only occasionally will people ask the rude and invasive question of, "So, what are you?" But I typically pass as white. But holy shit, do (most) white people have NO chill when they discover I am mixed. Microaggressions every day, blatant racism, and I somehow become the token Asian friend every single time and become their excuse to make racist Asian jokes.

Having to explain racism to grown adults because they think it's okay just because I'm not black(the only race they correlate with racism) and look white is frustrating and baffling. But I'm not Asian enough to fit into most Asian spaces. I'm generally brushed off as white, and I find it a bit embarrassing and shameful that I only speak English and have such a high disconnect to my Asian heritage. I even feel too white for wAsian spaces, but I honestly feel constantly disrespected and a little in danger trying to fit myself into predominantly white spaces. I'm lucky to have a best friend who is also mixed, not wAsian, but black and white. He has similar struggles to me and also has a heavy disconnect from culture due to being raised by two white parents. But it's still difficult and lonely.

Sorry for the vent post. If context is needed, I am 22, male, ⅔ white and ⅓ Japanese. My mother is white, and my father is wAsian.

fellow wasians, how are you shaping your brows? my hairs grow in weird directions and every brow place i go to tells me they can't work with it. help i am tired of being chopped :)

This is more of a question towards all that have this tradition, but i really want to have a traditional chinese tea ceremony at my wedding.

However because of where I live and who I am marrying (in addition to most of my chinese family having now died), the majority of wedding guests & ceremony attendees will be white. The only actual chinese people would be my mother, my sister and I.

You could obviously argue that I can do whatever I want and it's my wedding, but I am more worried about:

1. how awkward it will be for his parents and grandparents, who basically don't know anything about the culture and tradition

2. how much of an "exotic spectacle" and "interesting and unique cultural experience" it will be to the people involved, rather than being seen as a genuine tradition (you get exactly what i mean).

Is it too awkward if there's no more chinese people? I would be completely fine with the europeans gawking if at least 20% of the wedding attendees were chinese, but because it'll just be us three, I'm worried what it'll be turned into.

I wanted to know if there are any states or cities that are highly populated with Asian/White mixed individuals. Where i’m from (northern virginia) there is a decently high amount of wasians and i was just curious if there’s anywhere else like it? I would assume california and maybe new york/new jersey?