u/scifihere

Anybody else feels the supposed feminist subs on Reddit (yes, including the feminism sub itself) have been hijacked by men?

There are multiple posts every week on whether or not remove body hair, as if that’s women’s biggest problem right bow 🙄 But I’ve noticed that posts criticizing men’s behavior either get removed or get jumped by a bunch of accounts with “not all men”, “my husband definitely isn’t like that” or “there are also wonderful men out there” comments.

It’s sad but also makes me feel lucky to have found this sub. It feels like the only safe space for women on the internet. I really hope any future mods for thia sub (I know there was a call), get thoroughly screened and verified.

Any recommendations for a no-rinse makeup remover? Vichy Purete Thermale 3 in 1 was my go to for years until they changed the formula (I think?). It’s just not the same as before.

Any suggestions for a good moisturizing makeup remover?

I used to have crushes on attractive athletes or actors. Admired artists, authors, scientists, etc.

Not a single one of them has not disappointed me after digging more into their personal lives. I am just done with admiring or looking up to any male icons. They all turn out to be shitty people at the end with a skeleton in their closet.

I mean Bill Gates ffs…I used to admire him and Melinda so much and he turned to be a POS…

Steve Jobs, Albert Einstein, even Ghandi…If these are the supposed good guys, what can we expect from the rest?

Posting from another sub since crossposting is not allowed. Just so happy I don’t have to deal with this level of disrespect and neglect:

“Has anyone else had their husband obsessively check in on your undercarriage postpartum? He was making comments about having sex after one week. At week two he was asking to see my stitches. He got me a menstrual heating pad and massager as a gift one month postpartum....

I'm just so burnt out mentally and emotionally with everything going on. He drinks and games most night and I still havent gotten more than 4 broken hours of sleep. Hes planning a romantic date for us and arranged childcare for both kids, but all I want is rest and a clean house. He knows this and rolls his eyes.

Just... why. Why is it always about getting rocks off with men?”

Now…other women in the comments saying their husbands were so amazing and understanding during postpartum….I’d like to believe that but the cynical (?) part in me remembers all the men I’ve come across who can’t control themselves around women when they have a pregnant/postpatum wife at home…

For those of you who are posting spoilers today, I hope both sides of your pillow are warm for the rest of the week.

Btw, having a spoiler tag but attaching photos or spoiling in the title are just as bad if not worse.

Since the majority of posts on this sub are focused on lack of sexual intimacy…here is a thought? How about HRT for men to decrease their sexual desires? Who knows, maybe humans are not supposed to be that sexual beyond a certain age?

If you think about it, men’s sperm quality significantly declines by age and it’s not recommended to have kids, even if you can, beyond a certain age. So maybe what happens to women in menopause is in tune with nature and a signal for men to tone it down, not to find a younger non-menopausal woman and potentially knock her up.

The fact that most men in here want to force their wives to get on HRT is ridiculous. How about you reduce your testosterone levels so you get in tune? And before you remind me that HRT has other benefits, yes I am aware. But who are you kidding? We know that most of you just want to improve your sex life.

In summary, if the issue is non-matching sexual desires, why don’t men get on meds to get on the same level? Be logical in your responses.

What are your thoughts on men advising women to go on HRT? Do you think if this didn’t help their sex life, they would be so invested and interested in women’s health?

I read the menopauseshedformen sub where men constantly whine and cry about not getting sex, and talk about leaving, cheating, and polygamy. All the men in the comments are “is your wife on HRT yet?” or “Why is she resisting HRT? If she doesn’t want to get treatment, that’s on her.”

It makes me not trust HRT anymore. It’s starting to feel like another popular new thing that is designed to serve men. At the same time, I don’t want to be a pessimist and ignore its real positive benefits.

Any thoughts on this? I feel hormonal therapy should be approached with a lot of care and caution. But right now, it feels like people are prescribing it like candy just because it helps the marriage and sex life.

On average, what percentage of women experience the emotional symptoms of perimenopause (rage, lack of affection, extreme mood swings, etc.)? Is it the majority, 50%, 30%? Any research on this?

I think knowing the statistics would be helpful in terms of setting the expectations, building compassion, etc.

I recently read a comment from a guy who was crying about how men’s midlife crisis is a direct consequence of women’s peri menopause and how society has guilt tripped and shamed men for something that’s merely a reactionary response to being treated unfairly by their wives during peri and menopause.

I was infuriated. How would you respond to something this atrocious?

Edit: Aside from being furious, I found this concerning. All the efforts to raise awareness around peri menopause, and they are now going to use it against women?

The cynical part in me is starting to think maybe this whole awareness thing is not really to help women but to change the narrative about women’s capacity and abilities after 40, and to give men like this an excuse to be assholes.

First, I want to thank the members of this lovely community. I have always got the most helpful and realistic answers to my questions on here, compared to the other subs (perimenopause, menopause, etc.). I am really appreciative of you all! 🩷

I am in my late thirties and have started planning for and envisioning my older years. I am currently single and childfree by choice and am pretty happy with this decision so far. Reading about peri and menopause stories now, I can’t help but dread the future a bit and what it holds for me.

My main question right now is: 1) for those of you who went through peri and menopause as a single woman, was that ok or did you wish you had the support of a partner? 2) For those of you who had a partner, how was it or did you wish you went through it alone and single?

I have discovered a pattern in my cycle: About a week before my period (around day 19 to day 26), I become emotionally distant, prefer to be alone, don’t cry or get sentimental, no desire for sex, a bit irritable, but very logical, driven, and focused on work. I actually like it.

Then as the period gets closer, I soften up. I can feel the transition, and when the period hits, my tears flow easily, I miss everyone and love everyone so deeply, become sensitive, and desire sex.

Are these fluctuations normal? Someone on another forum said these are classic PMDD symptoms.

In my 30s, I have discovered a pattern in my cycle: About a week before my period (around day 19 to day 26), I become emotionally distant, prefer to be alone, hard to cry or get sentimental, no desire for sex, a bit irritable, but very logical, driven, and focused on work. I love it.

Then as the period gets closer, I soften up. I can feel the transition, and when the period hits, my tears flow at any moment for no reason, I miss everyone and love everyone so deeply, become so sensitive…I hate it.

Is that one week before the period how menopause feels like? If so, I can’t wait!

This is not a jab, I am genuinely curious: Why do men insist on having sex and go through the trouble of taking the blue pill when the thing is not working anymore?

Isn’t that nature’s signal that you should be retiring from sex?

Would love to know and understand why.

Edit: I am impressed by the number of angry and frustrated people on this sub. Like damn 😂 I take my words back: Y’all should absolutely go take a blue pill and get laid. Release that frustration. Immediately.

Can you describe what brain fog actually feels like? I see this term used a lot on the peri and menopause sub and it seems to be one of the common symptoms, but I don’t know what it actually means or feels like.

Is it like not being able to focus or think straight? Or is it more like brain fatigue and checking out?

Can you describe what brain fog actually feels like? I see this term a lot on this sub and it seems to be one of the common symptoms, but I don’t know what it actually means or feels like.

Is it like not being able to focus or think straight? Or is it more like brain fatigue and checking out?

Can you explain what brain fog actually feels like? I see this term a lot on this sub and it seems to be one of the common symptoms, but I don’t know what it actually means or feels like.

Is it like not being able to focus or think straight? Or is it more like brain fatigue and checking out?

My mother is in her 70s and has started having excruciating pain in her joints and bones. It’s to the point she can’t sit or sleep without being in tears and pain killers the doctor has prescribed are not helping. She stopped taking her bone density (?) pills a couple of months ago and that was when this pain started. She has started taking them again but with no effect.

I am getting hopeless. Anybody has an experience with this and knows what we can do? Doctors haven’t been helpful other than prescribing painkillers which are also really rough on her stomach.

Any help or advice would be much appreciated.

Is there any co-relation between pregnancy and peri symptoms? For example, childless women vs women with children and number of pregnancies?

How about life stylr factors, such as being an athlete, having an active lifestyle, alcohol consumption, smoking etc.?

Are there any research out there?

Everytime I post a relationship question on the 40plus or 50plus women subs, the comments get flooded with all these women who have amazing husbands and have been “one of the few lucky ones”. It’s almost like a competition on who has the most wonderful partner and who has been the most fortunate.

When I ask that same question on this sub, the replies are completely different, so much closer to the reality and to what I see with my own eyes in everyday life.

Why do you think it’s like that?

What percentage of men truly understand the hormonal fluctuations of women or show support for managing them?

My experience has been that men only add to my anxiety and not the other way around. They are generally not very sensitive or considerate (yes, even the best of them) and even those who try to have empathy or understand the struggles, can’t do it fully or for a long time.

I keep wondering if it’s worth getting in a relationship considering all the ups and downs, or would it just be easier to stay single and not get stressed about your partner’s lack of empathy or understanding.