u/sentientwafer

i grew up baptist. the church i was in and my parents have a very literal view on the bible. a big part of this interpretation is spiritual warfare and literal manifestations of demons. this always felt so concrete and real to me. im honestly finding it more difficult to let go of this worldview than it was to let go of the concept of god. learning about how the bible was actually developed in an academic environment was where my deconstruction began. but the paranormal aspect just felt real. i have a horrible human brain and it loves looking for patterns and danger. but i dont want to believe in demons or spirits anymore. the way adults talked about the paranormal was so scary as a child. its so cruel to teach your children that there are spirits so evil and so powerful that they can physically torment you or take control of your body.

lately i find myself searching for articles and accounts to debunk famous hauntings and folk tales of demons. i keep searching reddit for threads debunking really specific paranormal phenomena. mentally i file every story i hear into the category of “true until proven otherwise”. i make it my mission to prove otherwise. sometimes i lose sleep because ive come across some new tale of demons and i cant settle down or relax until i find some thread debunking this specific case.

has anyone else experienced this? im trying to be nice to myself about these fears because i recognize theres trauma here. but im feeling really frustrated because i just cant let it go

i have some pet tarantulas and i keep dubia roaches to feed them. ive grown to really like keeping a roach colony, and i was thinking of getting a pet species. i just think theyre so neat, i love watching them eat and its so cute seeing them after a molt. however, i am really allergic to cockroaches. i change out my dubia’s food and do whatever other maintenance is needed, night. i always walk out of the room coughing and i cant breathe through my nose, and my face turns red. im currently looking for food source alternatives for my tarantulas because of my allergy. but its hard for me to part ways with my dubia colony because i like them a lot. i was hoping there was a species i could keep as a pet that doesnt bother my allergy as much

hello! i have been into astrology since i was 13. i discovered astrology when i was questioning the rigid, conservative form of christianity i had been raised with. as a questioning christian and soon-to-be athiest, i believed that religion is what you find in something rather than being concrete truth. i loved the freedom i had to expolore my relationship with the world through astrology. but as i became more advanced in astrology i found something that i really didnt like. i was okay with my placements that a lot of people find unlikeable, like aquarius venus + stellium. at 15 i began to learn about the divination aspects of my chart, particularly in relation to my family. my sun sign has a lot of strong squares, which indicated great misfortune and death for my older brother. my only brother. i disregarded that information for the next few years. in my mind, divination is what you make of it. and if i chose to make nothing of the chart then it wouldnt matter. but in 2024 my older brother died in sudden, unfair, and unexpected circumstances at the age of 23. and my sun sign has been sitting in the back of my mind ever since. i used to love my chart, but now i cant see anything good in it. my love of astrology is something greif has taken away and i dont know how to take it back